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This is a writing assignment. Please do not write your name on your paper; instead, put the last 4 digits of your student ID # at the top of the page. Use a word processing software program (such as MS Word) to write your paper.

You comments will remain confidential -- I will not match your paper with your name.

Your paper should be between about 2 to 5 pages long. It will not be graded -- you will get full credit as long as you take this exercise seriously.

Print a copy of your paper, and give it to me at the next class session.

Later in the semester, we will review and discuss the comments.

Please write as thoughtfully, clearly, perceptively, and honestly as possible. Your classmates will read your anonymous comments, and some of your comments may be selected for inclusion in a book I am writing. (If, for some reason, you do not want your classmates to read your anonymous comments, or you do not want your anonymous comments included in the book, please write a note indicating this at the top of your paper.)

There are no "right" or "wrong" answers. Simply describe, as honestly as possible, what you feel and think. Again, all of your comments will remain anonymous.

In contemplating the traits of the opposite sex in general, as a group, write one or two paragraphs to answer each of the following questions. You do not need to include the question itself before your response. Also, think about what you actually like or dislike about the opposite sex IN GENERAL, not about the specific characteristics of one or two people you have known.

Also, you are writing about how you think the opposite sex actually is, not how might like them to be. Be honest -- don't try to censor your thoughts or worry whether they are politically correct.

When you are finished with your paper, save and print it. Then you will need to also include your comments about the opposite sex with those of your classmates at our class wiki web site (see: http://drmillslmu.wikispaces.com/,

Log in. Click on our class, Psyc 3010, and then click on Homework Assignment 1, women's or men's responses, as appropriate.)

Click the "Edit This Page" button at the top of the page. Then scroll down to each question to paste in your response to that question, followed by the last four digits of your student ID. Click "Save" when you are done.

Note: If you are doing the "Reactions to the Comments by Women" homework, do NOT insert your results below. Instead insert them in the Reactions to Women's Comments page.

#1. Think about the previous interactions you have had with the opposite sex. Has a situation ever occurred with someone of opposite sex that you found deeply puzzling and/or incomprehensible? And which you also think is somehow a function of that person's gender (not just the specific individual involved)? If so, think about what happened, and the behaviors, cognitions, motivations, or emotions of the opposite sex that you found particularly puzzling.

Fall 2017 class:

  1. I find it extremely puzzling how men do not clean up after themselves! They leave their clothes everywhere, they do not wash their dirty dishes, they leave the toilet seat up or do not clean the pee off the toilet seat. Its baffling how disgusting and messy they are and they do not seem to care. Men never stop and think maybe I should clean up my mess, rather they leave it without hesitation. They act so nonchalant and expect others to clean up after them, as if they are not capable (0224).

An interaction with an opposite sex can be different than what someone may expect. It can be puzzling when a guy does not understand what the girl wants or what is bothering them. I think that guys do not think out of the box, and that can be irritating to the girl because they do not understand what makes the girl happy. It bothers the girl when the guy does not recognize the things that puzzles the girl because the girl always recognizes the small details in everything. I feel like the guy does not take a situation seriously at certain times and when something upsets the girl, they try to win over an argument to think that they did nothing wrong. I think the guy tries to pretend that the situation never happened, and that annoys the girl because the girl always like the resolve the issue at the moment. Also, I find it puzzling when they fail to recognize what annoys the girl the most because I think recognizing what annoys the girl the most should be something they think about rather than for it to be ignored (9745)

1. I cannot think of a major thing that completely puzzles me about the opposite sex, but one small thing would be their concentration. I always find it difficult to understand why most males zone out when they are watching TV. You try to talk to them and they do not respond at all, but then I remember that I have been told many times that they cannot multitask as well as females do. Another thing that I do not understand is why all men mainly want sex from women. Why does that have to be the first thing they think about when they think about a woman? (8804)

1) I find it puzzling how it seems like men do not think things out. I do not feel like they understand the concept of feelings. I find that men are not very emotional and do not understand when a woman needs them to listen and have compassion. Woman need to discuss and express themselves and talk things out in order to move on. (4605)

1. In high-school my main friend group consisted of three girls and five guys. We were all really close and because of that our guy friends knew very personal and deep things about each of us. One of my girl friends had struggled with bulimia and during a conversation with my guy friend he brought it up as a joke. To me this was a time where I was deeply puzzled because I could not understand how he was able to make a joke about a very serious issue and one that his best friend went through. I just concluded that it was because he was a guy and he could not fully empathize with something like that. (7497)

1) I think that men think that as soon as they tell you they love you, they don’t have to show you love or be verbal about it again. It’s like they assume you just know how they feel about you but if they are leaving you on “read” or haven’t texted all day, you always wonder if you did something wrong. Or if they just don’t care enough to contact you? It also frustrates me when they want to act one way in front of their friends like they’re a bro and can’t be tied down and on the other hand when it’s just you two, they’re romantic and sweet. For girls we don’t suddenly have a personality change when were with our significant other and friends versus by ourselves with our partner. Is it an ego thing or lack of confidence by trying to impress your “bros”? It baffles me. (8090)

#1. I was a swim coach this summer for kids between the ages 2 and 6, both males and females. I know it’s silly to dissect a scenario like this when there’s such a huge age gap, but I truly believe gender plays a huge role from the instant children begin to interact with classmates, teammates or anyone outside their immediate family. There was always one trouble maker in every class I taught, and his name was Colton. There were many times that he’d watch girls in the class attempt to try something out of their swimming capabilities and make comments such as “she’s a girl, she’s not going to learn that as fast as I can”, or “you can’t teach her that, she’s going to be too slow. Leave it up to the boys.” This was particularly hard for me to handle because I couldn’t be upset with the boy for being instilled with this instinct and way of fathoming the reasons that some of the swimmers couldn’t learn as fast as him, but I also wanted to defend the girls, as a woman myself that knows it’s very possible that a girl can be a better swimmer than a boy. I think this was learned through observation from his father, and for some reason his mother never stood up for the fact that she too can be competitive and a fast learner as well. (8701)

1. Often, I find myself in situations with the opposite sex in which their behavior is strange to me. Mostly it is because, in my experience, males are inconsiderate and unobservant of their significant other. Women tend to take certain situations more to heart than men do. What I have come across the most with men is that they tend to just avoid and ignore you when they don’t want to talk about something or when they are no longer interested. In our generation, texting/messaging is the most popular form of communication. For example, dating apps like tinder and bumble are the main online dating forums these days. It is very easy to ignore someone over text messages. However, when you are in any sort of a relationship with someone, ignoring their text message does not mean that you are automatically going to be able to ignore them in real life. Men are not very confrontational, and therefore are more communicative electronically. Women love the intimacy of being able to talk to people to face-to-face. What I found to be most interesting is that men do not believe that what they are doing is rude, they just find it to be the easiest way to let a girl down. (2775)

1. I find myself often questioning the ways that men show and convey their emotions. They seem very open and for the most part willing to listen to deep or emotional conversations, though when asked about their own lives and emotional wellbeing they completely shut down. It seems that man as a whole just don't want to share their feelings as it may damage their reputation or cause someone to perceive them differently. I am puzzled by the way they seem to be able to almost compartmentalize how they feel. One minute feeling emotional or frustrated then suddenly changing gears and being completely okay like nothing ever happened, willing to forget the entire experience in order to not deal with emotions. (9609)

1. I find it puzzling the way males, in general, can find ways to sexualize women in order to gain the approval or friendship of other males. Additionally, sexualizing woman tends to be something men bond over and can relate to between each other. I have witnessed two male friends of mine see a girl and then glance at one another in a way that they think is discrete communication, but is very much noticeable to those around them. I cant seem to comprehend the notion of men gawking at women in a rude and disrespectful manner, then being praised for their behavior. I cant seem to tell whether it is a function of a hyperactive sex drive in men, or poor personality traits that most men seem to possess. (0082)

1. Something that I have noticed to be particularly puzzling of the opposite gender would be how they often times do not comprehend when another person is upset. I used to think they did it on purpose but I have come to realize that as a gender, men are much less receptive to people’s feelings, when not directly told of them. Therefore, if you are upset with a guy generally you have to tell them directly otherwise they will never know. (5649)

  1. One situation I experienced with a male that I found to be deeply puzzling was after I went on a date with a boy who told me that he couldn’t wait to see me again but then ultimately never reached out to me after words. I think that him not texting me and letting me know his reason for why he didn’t want to go out any more could be a comment on how men often do not consider the emotions and feelings of others. Additionally, I think that him completely disappearing could speak to men choosing to avoid situations that require them to be uncomfortable sometimes. (9336)

1. A few times in high school a guy that my friends hung out with at football games come up to me and start a conversation. The first time he came up to me it was to tell me that I should know he did not have a crush on one of the other girls in the group. I told him I didn’t think he had a crush on her and wasn’t really concerned. He then went on to tell me that he was much better than her anyway showing me with hand gestured scale that he was “up here” and she was “down here.” This offended me and I walked away. Later he came up to me again and flat-out asked me if I had low self-esteem. Perplexed, I asked, "why are you asking me this" and he said that I should not have agreed to go to the formal dance with another guy, his friend, who he deemed “below me.” We ended up having a really awkward double date before the dance. In hindsight, I think he was attracted to me and was trying to impress me with his confidence. I think that he thought he could win my favor by telling me that he was better than my friend and that his friend was not good enough for me. (0632)

1. One of the most puzzling situations I’ve encountered with the opposite sex happened just recently this year. I come from a family where the men tend to be very close minded and masochistic. One day, when I was working on a research paper, my uncle came home complaining about how hungry he was. He went to the kitchen and seeing that there was no food prepared, he yelled at me saying that it was my obligation as a woman to care for the men because they had been working out in the sun all day. We quickly got into an argument that really didn't get anywhere because of his stubborn belief that women should be nurturing and “stay at home wives.” What really upset me more about this situation is that my uncle is not the only male that I’ve encountered that thinks women are like prized possessions that just clean and cook for them.

I find myself often questioning the ways that men show and convey their emotions. They seem very open and for the most part willing to listen to deep or emotional conversations, though when asked about their own lives and emotional wellbeing they completely shut down. It seems that man as a whole just don't want to share their feelings as it may damage their reputation or cause someone to perceive them differently. I am puzzled by the way they seem to be able to almost compartmentalize how they feel. One minute feeling emotional or frustrated then suddenly changing gears and being completely okay like nothing ever happened, willing to forget the entire experience in order to not deal with emotions. 5609

Responses from the Fall, 2016 class:

1. I’m not sure if this counts as an interaction, but in middle school, we rotated classrooms and desks kind of like high schools do and I shared my desk with a group of 7th grader boys, and I would always find these drawings (and once even paper cutouts) of dicks. Just so many different doodles of dicks, how their dicks were bigger than their friends’ dicks, their friends sucking on their hairy phallus, just endless dicks in my desk. It was that sort of jokingly “homo-no-homo” sort of thing? Why boys are so fascinated by their own dicks and why they feel the need to engage in heterosexual yet honestly homoerotic interactions completely baffles me. (0496)

1. A situation that was baffling to me was after this guy told me he wanted to marry me and that he didn't date girls unless he saw a future with them and that he was a relationship guy and that he even thought we were lovers in a past life, he told me that he did not want a relationship and he had never said anything to imply that or try to make me become attached. There are a lot of other reasons and examples of why this guy is crazy, but it was so baffling to me that he could say that and wholeheartedly believe that he was no contradicting himself. I like to think that I pretty good at reading people but that really threw me off. (38750)

1. I’ve had instances where I’ve talked to guys for a long period of time, and they’ve legitimately flat out told me they liked me, and then slowly it fizzles out, or when we hangout together they don’t make a move, and I don’t know if because they’re nervous or their feelings change, but it just left me feeling confused and like I was playing some sort of game. I think this goes into boys being clueless and not realizing that they’re playing a game because they don’t analyze the situation like I do. However, I was super confused for a while and when I did eventually end whatever was going on I was left sort of wondering what went wrong and what that person’s reasoning or feelings were. 1. I find it incredibly puzzling when a guy that should know me very well considering how long we have been dating still fails to pick up on the cues that tell him something is bothering me. Me having to tell him what is wrong just angers me even further because by now he should know me front and back and know what pushes my buttons and what makes me happy. Failing to recognize patterns in my emotions and his behavior is incredibly puzzling for me because as a girl I pick up on the smallest details and fluctuations in a guy’s demeanor, tone, etc…yet the fact that a guy I’ve been dating for for months is so oblivious is incredibly puzzling. It makes me question if he purposefully tries to dodge the situation and look oblivious to avoid confrontation and a fight, or if whenever similar arguments occur—the things I say go in one ear and out the other and he doesn’t actually take into consideration what I’m saying and change his behavior for the future. 9994

1. yes, there are some instances I have encountered where a male's behavior has puzzled me such as when they catcall out of their cars when women are walking down the street. it might be a function of their gender in the aspect of domination as it can be seen as asserting their power over a female. It is less likely that females will catcall out to males in public, as they are seen as more reserved and to themselves than males. (5908)

1. One thing I’ve found to be particularly puzzling is that most men would rather lie than show true emotion. A lot of guys I’ve dated have lied to get out of having deep, emotional conversations. Even my dad has lied about “being too busy” or “not caring” all to not have to share his feelings, because it obviously made him feel extremely uncomfortable.Ultimately, I don’t understand how the ends justify the means. (7407)

1. I cannot think of a specific situation, but what is deeply puzzling is how some men can be so unemotional. Sometimes, when I get in arguments with my partner, I show behavior and give obvious signals that I am upset and/or sad and he does not notice. It really makes me angry and it causes an even bigger problem because I am already upset and then him not knowing makes it worse. I do not understand why he does not notice the obvious behavior I show to let him know I am upset. 3892

1. Upon getting in arguments with male characters in my life, such as my dad or my boyfriend, I often find the resolution or end of the argument to be very puzzling. I find that I need to fully work through and argument and talk about it until each side is fully satisfied. However, I find it odd that sometimes the male in the situation will simply get tired of talking about whatever we are arguing about and wish to cut it off and end the conversation. If this is done, I do not feel like I am ok with what has happened. However, my boyfriend can cut off an argument without fully talking about it and wake up in the morning and act like nothing happened. Similarly, my dad seems to act like he forgot the argument an hour later, while I am still thinking about it and still bothered by it. It seems they can show no emotion towards the argument just a short period of time after it ended. It leads me to wonder if men are simply able to move on more quickly, less emotional, or possibly less bothered by confrontation. (8778)

1. I have definitely been in a situation where I was just left deeply puzzled by an individual of the opposite sex. I don’t think that this was a function of that person’s gender; I honestly think it was due to his inability to competently communicate his ideas. Although I do think that males in general have a harder time communicating their ideas and thoughts. 1524

  1. I have found that previous interactions with the opposite sex are confusing to me at times. I believe that the opposite sex is emotionally handicapped in a way. They handle their emotions differently than women. There have my times with not one, but a few of my ex-boyfriends that have shown me men tend to keep things inside rather than express their feelings outright. Women that I know have shown they are much more emotional and in a situation such as a fight they want to talk it out and ensure that their side is being understood and sympathized with. Men on the other hand, tend to not want “drama” and like to retreat from problems even if that means hurting the opposite sex. I have experienced men ignore my feelings as a woman and do not like to deal with problems that occur. During my last breakup, my ex completely cut me off. This to me was something I could not understand as I would never do this to anyone while their feelings were hurt. I found it puzzling that he was able to ignore me after supposedly loving me and just one day it went away. I find it incomprehensible that he could go out with his friends and talk to other women right after the break up. This all showed me that men process emotions differently, many times they don’t wear their emotions on their face. This may have something to do with the gender role of being a man. Men are not supposed to cry or be sad, they are the providers and have to stay strong. This is how our society teaches men to be. Especially in our society today, many men are encouraged to “play the field” and be “players”. This is confusing to me because when I am seeing someone, I tend to only see one person at a time because I would never want to hurt anyones feelings. (6955)
  1. Something that I found puzzling about the opposite sex is that often times they disregard the emotions of other people, especially when it comes to conflict. It feels as if they have trouble empathizing with those involved. For example, there have been instances where some of my friends of the opposite gender have asked me whether or not they should string someone of my gender along for fun. Even though I told them that it was a bad idea, and they agreed that it was a bad idea, they still went through with it. They did not take the emotions of the person they were talking to into consideration. (0974)

> > 1. It puzzles me how males are so simple minded at labeling, whether it is labeling colors, relationships, clothes, or foods, their cognitive thought processes aren’t the same as females. Speaking from a personal experience, my boyfriend at the time labeled me as a “friend” when our relationship was more complex and developed. When I asked him why he called me a “friend”, he said it was because we were not officially dating. From my perspective, the title of a friend has a specific role and characteristics that did not appropriately fit with the type of relationship we had. When it comes to situations like dating or clothing, I feel like men have simple categories filed in their minds. If baffles me how simple minded they are and how they do not have such a large spectrum of thinking like women. (8870)

  1. I’m always puzzled by how deeply hunger and sleepiness affect men. In my experience, being hungry or tired has certain emotional and physical affects on men that I don’t see as much in women. I’ve seen a lot of men completely stop doing whatever task they’re doing once they realize they’re hungry. And if they aren’t able to successfully get food, the hangry-ness (anger or grumpiness caused by hunger) just hits them. The same goes with being tired; it seems as if slight hunger and sleepiness make men unable to focus on anything else, which I find to be kind of strange and funny. (9166)

1. I find it puzzling how the opposite sex does not take the feelings of women seriously because a lot of the time it seems that they underestimate the severity of the situation or how it affects the feelings of women. In many instances because of this men do not show empathy or sympathy, when really if they took they time to see the situation from the woman’s point of view, even if they didn’t agree, they would at least try to provide a more comforting response to the woman. Also, even if men don’t agree, if someone that you love is upset or hurt, I believe men should be supportive of the females and not write off the woman’s reactions as dumb, irrelevant, out of proportion, or simply PMS-ing. (1481)

1. One person in particular comes to mind, whenever he offers to go out to run errands, I tell him in detail what to get however when he comes back he gets all the wrong things. When tell him that he got something wrong or did not get an item, he then acts defensive saying things like, “I worked a long day…why do I have to do everything?” He changes the subject and puts the blame on me simply because he did not listen. In general, I find when men don’t listen they make up an excuse or spin it around on you. Also I am puzzled why they offer to do things if they don’t really want to do it? Usually when they mess up things like directions or errands they won’t admit they forgot what you said or say they don’t actually know what they are doing. Instead they want praise and their egos to be stroked. I feel a simple thank you would usually suffice but no it’s like they come home from school or their job and then tell you about all the stuff “they did” and then don’t empathize with what your day was like. Then when you bring up a struggle you had in the day it’s like they have to one up you. (5945)

1. I often find myself puzzled by the actions of males. Many of their actions fail to take other into consideration and they often act without thinking. It can be difficult to see, from a woman's perspective, why men sometimes act the way they do. I think men are more impulsive then women and that influences the way they behave as well. Women seem to be more intentional in their actions and try to see the bigger picture before they act. Personally, it is hard to understand why men fail to pause and think of the repercussions before they act when I try so hard to think about the outcome before I act. (8003)

1. I find it puzzling that some guys are just so scared of the big commitment of the title “girlfriend.” For some reason, giving the girl the title of “girlfriend” pulls a switch in their head that makes them think it was a proposal or something. Even though they would be hanging out the same amount and acting the same way as if they were not officially dating. (9097)

1. It puzzles me the way guys are socialized to be less emotional. From personal experience, I have found that guys actually have a lot on their mind and a lot of insecurity that they just chose to mask. I’ve dated guys who have told me that me that I’ve changed their lives because I’ve helped them realize and come to terms with things about themselves that they never let themselves look into before I encouraged them. While it does both me that men sometimes act more rationally than emotionally and struggle to pick up on social cues, I believe some of this has to do with socialization, not inability. (3816)

1. A recent situation I experienced with the opposite sex I found to be very deeply incomprehensible. I definitely think it was something that had to do with the gender, because I really don’t feel that it was behavior typical of those of my own sex. This guy and I had been talking for a solid two weeks and he had told me that he liked me. He told me that he wasn’t really looking for a relationship, but not necessarily NOT looking for one either. Kind of just one of those “whatever happens, happens” type of deals. This was fine with me because I was in the same position. So he took me out on two dates, made and talked about plans for the future, etc. Fast forward…we hang out one night and he tells me he wants to have sex with me but doesn’t have any sort of protection. So I of course say no, not until he has protection will I have sex with him. He says that is totally and completely okay because he is not trying to rush anything and seems very sincere about it. As I’m leaving his house, he tells me we should get together for dinner in the next day or two and kisses me goodbye. I never heard from him again. Was it seriously all because I didn’t have sex with him? If so that seems like something only a male would do. I have never heard of an instance such as that where the male and females roles were reversed. If he was so upfront about what he was looking for, why didn’t he just tell me that all he wanted was sex in the first place? I don’t understand the cognition behind that at all. (8635)

1. There has been many times where I find the opposite VERY puzzling. For instance, I have had a past relationship with a boy and years passed after we ended but every other time I see him, he is either very warm and friendly or very cold. I don’t understand because the last encounter can be great and fun but the next he decides to ignore me and push me to the side or make snide comments. I think this goes into the complex of the male’s ego. He has to be the one dominating the interactions and having that sense of control. So when he decides to either be fun and good humored or dismissive and passive aggressive it is his way of evoking control so that later I can decipher what he was attempting to mean. (3584)

1) Based on pervious interactions I have had with the opposite sex, I find men’s approach to commitment and labels puzzling. This is because they typically want the relationship without the labels. I dated this guy who persistently pursued me after we met out at a bar. His persistence led me to believe he was a relationship guy looking for a girlfriend. We started hanging out a lot and I became under the impression that he might be nervous to ask me to be official, therefore I decided to initiate the conversation. He hesitated and then explained that we are getting to know each other and that he is not ready to make it official. I was okay with that answer but it was also confusing. I was confused because he had admitted he liked me, had taken me out on dates, wanted to be exclusive and got me a thoughtful Christmas present and card. He even flew home with me and met my family before being comfortable labeling me as his girlfriend. I think this is somehow a function of his gender because as an individual he wanted the relationship but it was his perception about the label (and maybe the feelings associated with it) that scared him. Nothing about our relationship would have changed had we made it official sooner. (9634)

#2. In general, what do you like about the opposite sex? What do you dislike? Again, think of the opposite sex in general, as they actually are, not how you might like them to be different.

2. I like how men tend to be more confident in their self image and don't spend as much time getting ready and thinking about how others may perceive them. I like that they are straightforward and often easy to read. My dislikes about men is their unwillingness to be vulnerable because it calls into question their masculinity. For the most part, I like when men are competitive and confident about themselves, but there is a limit to when they start to let their ego get to them.

2) I like that guys have self-confidence because they do not think too much about what others think of them. Also, I like the fact that they do not hold grudges for a long time. Girls tend to hold grudges on their friends for a long time, but I find that guys move on faster. I like that they are straight-forward, protective, and have a more independent personality. I dislike the fact that guys are messy, do not show emotion, do not communicate effectively, and focus on a person’s look rather than their personality. I do not understand why guys do not like to show emotion because girls sometimes do not know what is going on in the guy's mind. I think it is better to express how you feel rather than keeping it in. Majority of guys like to date girls who is pretty, and that is something that I think should not be the number one factor in dating a girl. (9745) 2. What I like about the opposite sex is they have a very confident persona. They are not extremely self-critical and they tend to be happy with themselves. Men tend not to struggle with many insecurities, or at least do not openly express them. However, what I dislike about men is their lack of communication. When a situation arises I love to talk about my feelings but men tend to close themselves off and not want to resolve the issues. They want to just let it go and forget the problem existed, but in the end it causes a bigger problem down the road. (0224).

2. In general I really like the opposite sex. I think that they are easy to get along with and I like that they do not have much drama. They are fun to be around because it is always light-hearted fun. What I dislike about men is that they tend to be insensitive towards feelings and are not good communicators when you need them to be. When you try and talk to them about your feelings or about something you need reassurance on they tend to not take much interest and in return it can make you feel worse. (7497)

2. In general, I like how men are not dramatic, or at least less dramatic than woman. They do not go out seeking or wanting to hear the latest drama the way females do. I also like how men tend to be more confident than woman because they are no as self critical as females. Women feel that they have to wear makeup to look different or better than their naturals selves, and men do not do that and still seem to be more confident with themselves. There also things that I dislike about the opposite sex, like how messy they are. It seems like men are not organized and rely too much on the women in their life to clean up after them, and to know where all their belongings are. Men do not seem to worry about cleaning up after themselves as much as women do, and they are also much more unorganized. Being unorganized may also lead to them not being careful with their money, which becomes a problem in the long run. (8804)

2. To be honest, I can’t really think of any stereotypically masculine traits that appeal to me. What I like about the boys in my life are gender neutral traits such as kindness and intelligence and all that. What I don’t like about the stereotypical male is that they get angry and aggressive and violent more easily, they’re pretty messy and can’t take very good care of themselves hygienically, they tend to be shallow and objectify women, they place too much emphasis on being sexually promiscuous, they don’t help with housework or with children, they get so needlessly worked up over sports, they aren’t in touch with their own and other people’s emotions, and so on and so forth. I think men feel like they constantly have to prove their own masculinity, which is kind of annoying. (0496)


  1. I mostly like that men are protectors and also their spontaneity is something I can be envious of. I dislike their lack of cleanliness and hygiene, and the fact that they can be stubborn and insensitive at times.
  2. I mostly like that men are protectors and also their spontaneity is something I can be envious of. I dislike their lack of cleanliness and hygiene, and the fact that they can be stubborn and insensitive at times.

2. I like how men are so simple, they are easily satisfied, and choosing an outfit does not require much time and money. I dislike that men are not emotionally intelligent. (3892)

2. I like that men are more likely to say exactly how they feel and not be as passive aggressive as females. I dislike that they at the same time do not seem as i tune to their own emotions and to other emotions compared to females, as it comes across like they do not care as much. (5908). 2. I like how men tend to conduct themselves more confidently. They don’t hesitate when speaking or acting and go after things they want without reluctance. I dislike when this confidence goes to far and the person appears to be cocky, and stubborn and impossible to talk to. In general, the things I like about men are that they are athletic and strong—I find it attractive to watch them play sports or get really excited and passionate about a sports game. Also, having an athletic and strong physique is something I like about men. I like that men have confidence and I like that they take charge in difficult or sketchy situations. For instance, if my tire was flat, I like that a man would take charge and help fix it. For the sketchy situations, for example, if I were being harassed a guy takes charge and makes me feel protected and gets me away from an unwanted situation. Also, I like that men keep a pretty consistent emotional demeanor—meaning their emotions are not going haywire and they aren’t tipped off by the littlest inconveniences.

In general the things that I dislike about men are that they can be stubborn and always feel the need to be right. This can make any debate or argument difficult because they are stuck in their own ways and refuse to take into consideration other peoples opinions or advice because of their own stubbornness or ego. I also don’t like that men can be really messy and sloppy. I don’t like that men are so clueless about women’s emotions because it seems that unless we explicitly tell them exactly what is wrong they cannot pick up on the cues telling them that something is wrong. And even so, when you do explain what is bothering you—they still can be entirely clueless and not recognize why it’s a problem or just don’t want to put in the effort to understand. I don’t like that in general men do not have a filter for what they are saying and can be incredibly inappropriate and vulgar—saying things in front of girls and even their girlfriend that is crude and makes girls feel uncomfortable. (9994)

2. I like how men do not over-think and complicate things. I believe that I, and probably many other women, often over-think things. However, men in my life are always able to break matters down simply and avoid worrying excessively. I dislike that men often do not pick up on subtle emotional cues, and have a harder time reading emotions. (8778) 2. I like that males often tend to come off as confident, even if they are faking that confidence it is refreshing to see people who don’t constantly outwardly express their insecurities. I also like that they are able to “take a joke” instead of taking everything personally. I do not like their large egos, along with their overall arrogance. From my experiences it seems like men are more likely to express their superiority in whatever situation they can whereas females tend to be more humble. 1524 2. I like that if I am with a straight male it is different from being with a straight female, because society has conditioned women to be in competition with one another for men, and when you're with a man it's not like that. I feel a little more relaxed in that sense. Overall though, I like that guys are not as competitive with women as they are with men. I think that this is probably true because of the way society is set up and women are probably more competitive with other women than against men. I dislike that men are conditioned, in Western society at least, to bottle up their emotions and pretend they don't have any. (38750) 2. I like that guys tend to be pretty confident and uncomplicated when it comes to their decisions. I’m not trying to say that they don’t think things through, but I have noticed that they do not seem to dwell on a decision after it is made. For example, when a guy gets dressed in the morning his decisions are simple and quickly made—pants, shirt, shoes and move on. (0632) 2. I like the freedom in which most men seem to live. Most seem relatively uninhibited and unapologetic about the manner in which they live their lives. I also admire their lack of emotional aggression — in my experience, men don’t often elicit drama or hold grudges against others. However, this unapologetic aspect of men’s personality may also turn into excessive stubbornness and unwillingness to admit to being wrong. (9166) 2. I like that men are providers and often times take care of their families. I enjoy how men look and the joy they bring when I am attracted to them. I like that men are confident or at least that they act confident and “fake it until they make it”. I like that men tend to have a more easygoing personality and sense of humor, they tend to take my jokes less seriously than women. I dislike that the opposite sex appears to be emotionally handicapped when it comes to problems in relationships. I have heard from so many girlfriends of mine that their boyfriends or ex boyfriends are the same way. It makes me wonder are we the problem, or are they? We may be too sensitive, but they may be emotionless. It could be a mix of both. I dislike that men tend to have big egos and often come off arrogant. This could mean they are trying to cover up insecurities to fit in with society’s view on how they should act and feel. (6955) 2. Some qualities about men that I enjoy are their ability to me athletic and straightforward – they do not beat around the bush when you ask them for their opinion. I strongly do not like how men are not as openly emotional as women. They do not seem to be as sensitive or personable in situations that involve expressing their feelings or thoughts, especially relationships. A lot of men act like oysters and bottle up their emotions to seem like a tough guy or someone who is not fazed easily with sensitive topics. 8870 2. I like that men have a type of dominance to them. Dominance can be very attractive in the situations ranging from asking out a woman to mutually consensual sexual events. I dislike the insensitivity of men when dealing with women’s emotions. I believe that men can easily write off emotions as unimportant, unlike a woman who would spend time talking about the situation and trying to make the person feel better by thoroughly listening and responding in a caring way. (1481)

  1. Something that I like about the opposite sex is that they are straightforward when it comes to their opinion or their emotions. Often times, they do not have a hidden meaning behind what they are saying. If they dislike someone, most of the time they will make it apparent that they dislike them, and if they like someone they let it be known that they do. Because of this, you do not have to be worried whether or not they are telling the truth about their feelings. However, something that I dislike about the opposite sex is that often times they go too far with their honesty and lack a filter. This can lead to very uncomfortable situations, and there have been instances whether either me or my friends have been left in uncomfortable situations because of this. (0974)

2. I like that men are generally easy to read meaning that they say what they mean and there isn't much else to it. I like that they can be strong and assertive when need be but sometimes, they can take it too far. Every now and again, guys need to be able to back down and lose an argument. I like that guys are outdoorsy and athletic. Being athletic myself, it's nice to have people to be active with and be outside. I like that guys can be more emotionally stable than women tend to be. They are more even-tempered most of the time, which makes their behaviors more predictable than a woman's. I dislike that men aren't as aware of the emotions of others and are less empathetic than women are. I also dislike that men can be jerks and have no filter sometimes. Some of the things they say or do are annoying or degrading and sometimes they don't realize it. (8003)

2. In general, I like the vast difference from femininity. Masculinity is a mystery to me and it’s like a puzzle I want to solve. For example, they look physically different, have hair all over their body, smell a certain way, and are built in a whole different manner (usually taller, and have a greater mass). In general, I dislike their superiority complex viewing women as lesser whether it’s financially, academically or physically. Our society has ingrained into the male mind that they have to have control over women. Once I overheard my friend’s roommates talking about how they would never take a female boss seriously. I was shocked listening to them as if a women could not be just as enforcing as an employer. But it is not only those boys who think women are weak, there is a greater picture. Boys are taught from a young age to not “cry like a girl” or “to man up” there is an emotional stigma. Emotions equal weakness and I absolutely cannot stand the emotional disconnect some men have, not being able empathize is a real problem. Empathy is not a weakness, so there should be no emotional stigma. (5945)

2. I like how most males are genetically more protective and tough then women are. However, I do not like how for most males it gives them a sense of empowerment over females. (9097)

2. I enjoy how light-hearted and calming men can be. Additionally, because they often struggle being emotional and vulnerable, it makes it that more special when you’ve gotten to the point where you both are open, expressive and supportive. I’ve also found that my guy friends are some of the most loyal and considerate people when you become very close to them. (3816)

2. In general, I like that males are protective, funny, non-dramatic, straight forward, and physically strong. I don’t like that they are afraid of showing emotion, clueless in many relationship situations, stubborn, and messy/disorganized when it comes to think like their rooms and clothes. (8635).

2. I really enjoy the carefree and simple mindset that males have towards life. All the men in my life tend to have a linear way of thinking that is more rational and are able to be more clear and assertive, while I struggle to make decisions or think clearly in some situations because my emotions get the best of me. I dislike how stubborn they can be! I am also stubborn so sometimes arguments are inevitable (3584)

2) In general, what I like about men is their simplicity. They are simple in the sense that they are straightforward and low maintenance. They say what they are thinking because they don’t over think and complicate things. They are low maintenance because they care less about image. I also like how they are protective. I feel safer walking with a man and am comforted by his presence, even if we are alone in my house. The usefulness of men is also likeable. They are especially handy when moving because they are able to lift heavier objects and some have a truck. In general, what I dislike about men is their lack of emotional intelligence. I don’t know if they are even aware that they do this, but they seem to not be in tune with their emotions because they don’t express them as much as women. This then leads to a lack of empathy, which is frustrating when we want them to understand why we are upset. A lack of empathy then results in narrow-mindedness, which is frustrating when trying to discuss worldviews that are different than their own. (9634)

2) I like how men are known as the protective ones. When going out with a male friend its like always having a bodyguard because he is the one who will take care of everything in any situation. I also like how are less judgmental on themselves because girls are always more opinionated and hurtful about themselves and others. I dislike how men are disorganized. They are dirty messy do not feel the need to keep their things in order and organization a key to success. I also like when males show confidence. It’s a really attractive quality, however, there is a difference between confidence and cockiness. I also think it is very important for a man to be able to support his family very well. Success for a man is important because it gives them confidence and respect from others and helps keep his family happy. I know money is not the only thing that counts, however, to a certain extent is important to look into that to see how he will be able to support and take care of you and your family. (4605)

2. Generally speaking, I like how a lot of guys can be protective over a girl and try to make them laugh whether it be a friendly relationship or a romantic one. And from most of my experiences, I like how a lot of times they put the woman first. Their straight-forwardness is also something I appreciate. Males are much simpler than women so sometimes I feel it being easier to be friends with a guy than a girl. They do not tend to go behind your back and say negative things about you. On the other hand, what I do not like is their stubbornness, lack of cleanliness, and double-standards. To me it seems as if men think it is alright to get close to other women when in relationships but find it completely horrific when their partners ever interact with other men. (4259) 2) What I really like about men is that they are strong and tall. They can be protective and comforting to have around in scary situations and life in general. They can be great companions who are always by your side. They keep you safe from harm and make you feel loved and comforted. I also think that deep voices are incredibly attractive. I also like that men don’t have to put much effort into their looks. I find it impressive to be honest. What I dislike about men is how disrespectful some men can be; from cat calls, to uncomfortable staring, whistling, disrespectful treatments and misogynistic comments. I find it disappointing that these issues have persisted on for years and years. That kind of behavior is taught and learned. It has to come to end. It is just disgustingly disrespectful. I also don’t like when men are overly-confident or cocky and are unwilling to be vulnerable and open. Openness and vulnerability are the key to any successful and healthy relationship. I think that men’s inability to be vulnerable is a detriment to many worthwhile relationships. (8090)

2. When it comes men, I enjoy how straightforward they are. If they have a problem with a friend, they will say it to their face and ten minutes later the problem is resolved as it never happened. They say what they think which is often refreshing. I dislike on the other hand how confrontational most men seem to be. Its as though when angry, they try to pick a fight just for the sake of being angry and often their fights lead to a physical altercation. (9609)

2. What I like the most about the opposite sex would be their confidence/willingness to protect women and put others first. I also tend to like their humor and easy-goingness. What I dislike about the opposite gender would be their lack of empathy (although it is usually not intentional). I also dislike how aggressive and loud they can be.(5649)

2. Generally what I find most appealing about the opposite sex is humor, their strength, protectiveness, and their nonchalant nature. The strength most men have is not only physically appealing but also very useful for heavy-lifting and their height is useful for when someone like me cannot reach a top shelf. Protectiveness goes hand in hand with masculinity. Men show their masculinity by being concerned for their significant other’s safety and well-being. However, there is a fine line between being protective and being possessive. This is not a trait distinct to men, there are many women that are considered crazy or jealous because they are constantly concerned as to where their significant other is. What I mean by nonchalant nature is that men are very relaxed and flexible with their time. They do not desire drama of any sorts and they are very accommodating. I dislike that that men are clueless of the hints women sometimes drop. I do not necessarily mean that every guy should be able to read the minds of women, however, I definitely feel that they could be a bit more observant and considerate of women’s emotions. This leads into their “closed-off” behavior towards their partners. Men view portraying their emotions as a sign of weakness, when they should view it as a way to connect with their partner on a deeper level. (2775)

I like that the opposite sex seems to trigger so many emotions for each other. Whether that be because of feelings, conversations, words, interactions — there are always so many follow up reactions about encounters that go on between a male and female. Although a lot comes along with those feelings, good and bad, it’s stimulating to even have interactions like that which I think are far more different than same sex interactions. I also like the instant feeling of protection that I feel around men.

I dislike the way that their hyper masculinity can get in the way of truly connecting with women and the pride that they have to put aside to empathize and understand the way the women naturally want to nurture and care for a male that they care about.

#3. What is the one thing that the opposite sex most misunderstands about your own sex?

One thing that men often misunderstand about women is what we mean to say. Men tend to take everything a woman says as literal. They suck at reading between the lines, interpreting emotions, or understanding what is left unsaid.

3) I think that guys misunderstands the fact that girls are sensitive and emotional. Girls being sensitive and emotional is part of who they are because I believe it is better to show your emotions rather than keeping it inside because it can be hard in a relationship if one person does not understand what you want. Also, girls are born with different hormones and those hormones tend to make girls more emotional the way they are. (9745

3. They think that women are overly emotional when it is usually just because they are not in touch with their emotions and are not able to express them. If you ever bring up something that they did which upset you they get extremely defensive and blow it off saying that you are too emotional and that you are over reacting about the situation. (7497)

3. The one thing men do not understand about women is that we are extremely strong, physically and mentally. Women go through painful menstrual cramps every month and if they decide to have a child- their body goes through a tremendous change. Women also deal with an influx of hormones that take a toll on our mental health! (0224)

3. I believe males misunderstand how much females actually think. Females tend to overthink everything, which is why they are more dramatic at times. Males do not really understand the way women think of everyday things, which also leads to misunderstanding of communication. Women can understand each other more than a man can understand a woman, because females think the same way.(8004)

3. I don’t think women are overly emotional, it’s just that men aren’t in touch with their own emotions so they can’t empathize. (0496)

3. When men think that women belong in the kitchen. Not all women like to cook or even know how to cook. (3892) 3. Men seem to always be misunderstood in thinking that women always want something serious. They think if they take you on a real date you are going to try to marry them or that if you want to hang out more you are trying to be their girlfriend. (8778) 3. Males often times do not understand nonverbal cues nor do they realize they exist. From what I’ve noticed they can’t read body language or tone of voice as well females. So I can’t blame them when a girl says “it’s fine” and they take that for face value. Men tend to be more straightforward so when they hear “it’s fine” they do not ask more questions because they are not reading body language. 1524

3. I think that the opposite sex tends to think that women are “crazy” and “dramatic”. I don’t necessarily believe that is true. Although women can act in those ways, there are often underlying reasons why. For example, many of my ex’s, some who I am friends with now, have told me this about myself and the other women they have and are dating. Just the other day one of my guy friends said, “I attract the crazies”. I believe men do not realize that women have emotions and when those emotions are rejected or ignored and viewed as unimportant, we feel disrespected and in turn act out in order to get the response we want. However, I have found that it is easier to get the response and closure within yourself because you will never hear the exact answer you want too. It will never be perfectly correct. (6955)

3. Assuming that anger or other strong emotions are because we’re on our cycle is a big thing that men tend to misunderstand about women. Feeling passionately enough about something to vocalize it doesn’t necessarily mean that. Also, hormones don’t have full control over our emotions during that time; we don’t become completely different people, so what we say or feel could definitely be stemming from somewhere. (9166)

The one thing that men most misunderstand about women is their sensitivity. Men can be rude and insensitive and say cruel things to women and don’t understand that their words can have a very negative impact. However, at the same time, they make comments about our sensitivity by saying things like , “don’t be so sensitive” which only escalates the frustration and furthers the problem.

3. Something that the opposite sex misunderstands from my own sex is that there are times when we want to have the solution to the problem and there are times when we want to talk and not necessarily come to an answer straight away. As shocking as it may sound, there are times when we want to talk about our feelings, or how a situation occurred, without wanting to come to a solution as to how we can stop feeling that way or how we should simply get over it. (0974)

3. One thing that men most misunderstand about females is the pain of giving birth and contractions. Although I have not gone through the process of childbirth yet, from my understanding, it is the most intense physical pain any women have to go through. Men cannot comprehend the anatomy of a woman during childbirth.8870

3. I feel that men most misunderstand that women crave attention. Women put a lot of effort into their looks and in everything they do, so for a man to ignore the work that women put in and not pay attention to the ways that she tries to get him to notice her can be frustrating. (1481)


  • Body image issues. I feel like men don’t look so harshly at women’s bodies as women tend to look at their own bodies. Also men don’t judge their own bodies as harshly and tend to make changes by eating healthy and working out and not resorting to eating or body disorders.

3. The thing men most don't understand about women is our emotions. We're so much more in tune with how we're feeling and can sense how others are feeling while men have a much harder time reading people's expressions and actions. (8003)

3. Women do not think that men should never show their feelings ever and that they always have to be the macho man to be attractive. (5908)

3. That it’s difficult to be a woman. That there are many hurdles women have to jump through to be taken seriously and be treated like an equal. Males try to compensate for the fact that they are treated better than women so they coddle us, “oh you can’t do that, let me do that” almost like were incapable of providing the same level of work. (5945)


  1. 1. The male species misunderstands most about females would have to be our thought process when we expect males to know what we are thinking and feeling. I try to think about it from their perspective and take into consideration with how simple their thinking is and how little drama they like to deal with. If girls are always silent about an issue, there would be no way for a guy to read your mind and assume that you are upset about something.

3. We are not all catty and overdramatic. We also don’t necessarily all fit the “jealous” and “insecure” type either. I think a lot of the problem is the way that men and women tend to show affection and their emotions are just different, so it often seems like women are more affectionate – but from my experience it’s just a difference in love language. Women may naturally like words of affirmation and gifts, whereas guys may show love with acts of service. (3816)

3. There are two things I think men misunderstand the most about women. Men think that women are incredibly complex and they also think that they are overdramatic. Personally, I do not believe that women are more complex than men, but I have heard a lot of men say that they think women are confusing and "just don't make sense." I have found that when guys say this, usually it is because they are failing to be self-aware or look at a situation and think about what they could have done to cause a woman to act in such a way. Or they are not empathetic enough to put themselves in the woman's shoes and see how they would feel, because if they did they would realize that they would feel hurt too and suddenly women aren't that complex once men see them as people instead of just focusing on one aspect of them. Likewise, often times when guys say that women are overdramatic, it is because they are failing again to put themselves in their shoes, and rather than taking responsibility for their actions that caused the woman to be legitimately upset, which would mean they messed up and they don't want to admit any kind of fault, they make up and excuse, such as "girls are just dramatic" or "girls are crazy", which is just another way to put down and discount their feelings. I think that men would not misunderstand women as much if they treated them as human beings who have the same emotions as them and get hurt too, and instead of calling them overdramatic, realizing that maybe they just vocalize their emotions more than men because society deems it more acceptable for them to do so. (38750)

3. One thing males most misunderstand about females is that we are too emotional. And, if we are emotional about something, that it’s simply because of our hormones or the fact that we are women. It almost seems as though they take away the depth of the subject matter we are emotional about and inly attribute it to our sex. (8635)

3. Often time's men forget that women are also able to separate emotions from physical attraction. It is not just males who are able to distinguish physical attraction and emotional attraction. A common misconception is that every girl is looking for a relationship when in reality women are just as capable and actually do participate in the hook up culture (3584).

3) One thing that men misunderstand about women is our “strength”. Men perceive us as weak because we express our emotions and are more sensitive, but we actually embody a lot of strength because of the societal obstacles that we have to overcome in our everyday lives. Even if we aren’t aware of it, we are constantly overcoming objectifications and assumptions regarding our abilities. Constantly having to prove our worthiness requires a strength that men haven’t developed.

3)Often times I hear men calling women dramatic or crazy, but they do not understand the mentality behind women’s actions. Usually I find that girls act crazy because there is a reason to act crazy. It’s not like we want to be dramatic and act like lunatics. If we aren’t given a reason to act that way, we won’t. Men can reject women’s emotions and this can make us overthink and act in ways we wish not to. (4259)

1) The opposite sex which are men most misunderstands a girls train of thought. Boys don’t understand when a girl is really upset because girls usually say nothing but it’s the tone that gives it away. Boys need to stop and think about a girls feelings first before they assume it is all okay. Boys do not make the effort to try and figure out what is going on in the girls mind, instead they act clueless and act like they don’t understand what they did wrong. Men think that woman are dramatic. Woman express their feelings and men don’t see it or understand it and believe them expressing their emotions is an act of drama and being crazy. 3) I think that men often think that women are too sensitive, but I think it’s rather the inverse that men are not sensitive enough. From a young age, many men are taught to suppress their emotions, to be tough, to be brave, and to be the man of the house for their sisters and mothers. I think that it is crucial for men’s development that they are taught at a young age how very important it is to be in touch with your emotions and how you’re feeling. Men are trained to think of sensitivity as something that is intolerable, especially among other men. So it only makes sense that they would feel so strongly that women are over-emotional because they were never fully allowed to express or accept that kind of emotion within themselves. (8090)

3. I think what men misunderstand the most about women would be our feelings in general. I think guys have a hard time understanding what we are feeling 90% of the time which is why there tends to be such a large communication issue a lot of the time.(5649)

  1. I feel as though men, as a stereotype, sometimes view women as more emotional or weaker than they are. In the sense that they are incapable of separating their emotions from certain situations. I have also heard that men think women love to gossip and thrive off of drama. It is strange because as a girl I would agree that I do enjoy talking about others, however, I do not necessarily always speak of them poorly. Since women do much more enjoy communicating with each other, they form a bond through their similar interests. Also, I would like to add that drama is in fact entertaining to listen to at times, but personally I do not enjoy starting drama or being involved in drama. Men also do not understand that women want honesty. I would much rather a guy tell me that he is not interested in my right off the bat as opposed to dragging me on for a few months before doing so. This way there are not as many feelings involved and both parties can feel slightly more relieved. (2775)

1) The opposite sex which are men most misunderstands a girls train of thought. Boys don’t understand when a girl is really upset because girls usually say nothing but it’s the tone that gives it away. Boys need to stop and think about a girls feelings first before they assume it is all okay. Boys do not make the effort to try and figure out what is going on in the girls mind, instead they act clueless and act like they don’t understand what they did wrong. Men think that woman are dramatic. Woman express their feelings and men don’t see it or understand it and believe them expressing their emotions is an act of drama and being crazy.

#4. Think about a time when you found yourself particularly attracted to someone of the opposite sex. What characteristics of that person do you think attracted you? What was the most important factor that attracted you to this person, e.g., physical appearance, personality traits, self-confidence, social status, friendly gestures toward you, et

The first thing that attracts me about a guy is his physical appearance but it is his personality and charisma that gets me to develop feelings for him. Beyond his looks, I like a guy who is easy to talk to. I tend to be a very shy person so when I meet a guy that gets me talking and make me feel comfortable, I get attached emotionally. I’m usually attracted to men who is funny and and intellectually smart that challenges my opinions and presents me to new ideas. I like men with ambition and confidence without being too arrogant or cocky about themselves. Overall, a friendly and outgoing personality is what makes them extremely likeable.

4. I have had three serious boyfriends and each time it was something different that made me attracted to them. Most recently it was because he is a hard worker and has drive and motivation. He is also very caring and loves life. He cares about his friends and family and most importantly is a gentleman. He takes an interest in my life and makes an effort with my friends and family. (7497)

4 . The last man I found attractive was extremely funny. He was a bit quiet, but when he did talk he would make people laugh so much they’d almost cry. He would also joke with me and that made me feel special. (0224)

4) I find it attractive when a guy is tall, muscular, funny, and has a caring personality. Also, it is attractive when the guy puts you first before anything else. Attractiveness is not just about the physical features, but it is about their personality. If they have a friendly gesture towards you, that is a plus because they should always treat you with respect. Respect is something that someone should always find attractive in a guy because if they do not have respect for you, they will just use you. (9745) 4. I like a guy who is relatively well groomed and doesn’t smell bad. The last guy I liked was really nice, funny, a huge dork, intelligent consumer of media, aware of social justice, and secure enough in his masculinity in that he didn’t feel the need to demonstrate his “machoness” all the time. We’re both artists, and he is tremendously talented and I’ve always admired his work. Even though he’s way better than I am, he never talked down to me and was always encouraging. (0496)

4. The eyes of the person of the opposite sex are what attract me first, and other physical appearances also attract me first, such as height and build. After the initial first look at the person, if I get to hear the person speak to others or myself, I find it attractive if I catch that they have a great personality. I consider a great personality someone who is funny but also serious when needed. What I find the most important in order for someone to be attractive to me is that they are respectful not only to me, but all women such as mothers, sisters, and friends. He has to understand that women need to be respected and are not just some side piece.(8804)

4. Physical appearance has a lot to do with my attraction towards the opposite sex, but personality is what either makes or breaks it for me. I like guys who are tall, tan, and buff, but that does not mean that I am not frequently attracted to a guy who is only one of these things or even none of them. I think there are many different types of beauty and I have been attracted to men of all races. I like guys who are sweet and caring towards others and who are also confident and outgoing. I like guys who are friendly and are not afraid to start conversations or say hi to people even if they do not know them well. I like guys who go out of their way to be nice to people and who don’t feel like they have to prove themselves or show off to their friends. For me to be really attracted to a guy, he has to be confident and secure with himself and be his own person and also make an effort to get to know me and talk to me. One guy I liked would always come up and hug me, even if he was with his friends, he would take time to hug me and ask me about my day and that made me feel special and like him more because he singled me out and took time to show he cared, even if it was brief because he was running late to class. (38750)

4. Some of the few physical characteristics that men possess which I am attracted to are: tallness, muscular (a fit man), eyes, broad shoulders, clear skin, and nice teeth. As far as personality traits, I am attracted to someone who shows that they are kind, genuine, and caring. Also, I am typically attracted to men who are the same ethnicity and social status as me. (3892)

4. I am most attracted to confidence, adventurous spirit, and the appearance that he has his life together. I find it very attractive when someone is independent and shows their unique love for life. Personality is most important, but also appearance is important. Of course it was also important that he act friendly towards me. In terms of looks, I am attracted to a healthy physique. (8778)

4. I think its a combination of the little things someone is attracted to that makes someone infinitely more attractive as a whole. Looks definitely play a role because they are often what grips you about someone right off the bat. But more importantly, when a man has an attractive personality that is contagious to be around, that's the most critical aspect. Beyond that when someone has a good balance I thin that's very attractive (for examples being responsible and also spontaneous, etc.) and then everything from there (such as a good job, a nice family) just seems like a bonus. (1569) 4. I find myself attracted to men who are confident but not overly arrogant and men who can communicate openly. I am most attracted to people who can match my relaxed energy level. People who are too laid back bore me and people who are always on the move exhaust me. 1524 4. The person that I am currently attracted too now first caught my attention because of his looks. After getting to know him, I realized that he was shy and not arrogant but did in fact have self-confidence and independence which inspired me. Also, the fact that he can cook and I can’t is a major plus! (6955) 4. When I found myself attracted to the opposite sex, I think something that I found attractive was their confidence. However, there were cases when this confidence became cockiness. Even though I was well aware of how annoying their confidence could be occasionally, I tend to overlook this because this is what got my attention from them in the first place. Physical appearance was also a factor, but I do not believe it was as important as their confidence. (0974) 4. In order for me to be attracted to someone, they have to be physically be attractive (they do not need to be a high 10 on the scale from 1-10), taller than me, brunette, ambitious in life, has goals for success, athletic, enjoys beer, loves sports, and is family oriented. 8870 4.The last guy that I found attractive was a very humorous individual. He had a very serious look to him and acted dominant, but he also had the ability to just act like a goofball. He had a very deep voice and was 6’2”, which I found incredibly attractive. He was never the popular guy and always remained the type of underdog character. He would write me hand written letters and spend hours to me talking on the phone because we were far a part from each other. This aspect made me feel important because it showed me that I was worth his time and made me feel like I was the highlight of his day. When we were together he would always put his arm around me in a protective way and even had me walk on the inside part of the street while he walked on the side with the cars which he claimed was so I wouldn’t get hurt. He would also surprise me with gifts at random times and would always talk about how amazing I was to his friends and parents so I felt important and loved. (1481) 4. One particular guy that I was attracted to seemed to have it all. He was good looking, athletic, intelligent, outgoing, kind, funny, and had an overall great personality. I think the most important factor that attracted me to him was his outgoing, down for anything attitude. I liked his adventurous nature and how excited he was to try new things. (8003) 4. I use to believe the strongest connection of immediate attraction was finding the person who was good looking however when I started going out with guys who were my ideal physical match, I found there were no commonalities. Then once I found them to have nothing in common with me, I found them no longer attractive and everything physical felt staged or fake. Once I let go of the physical aspect I found I was much more attracted to qualities they had, such as empathy, kindness, a good listener, someone who really tried understand me instead of change me. (5945) Their confidence attracted me and their ability to talk to me openly as I am shy and need that initiation from the opposite sex as well as their sense of humor. Their friendly gestures towards me made me feel that they liked me and secure that they did like me, which attracted me the most. 4. The first thing that attracts me to a guy is my ability to trust him. I chronically date my best guy friends because they earn my trust, and by the time we start dating I generally consider them the most genuine and caring people I know. In general, I tend to gravitate towards quieter/nice guys with a sense of humor. If they make me feel comfortable and loved and aren’t afraid to be a little more on the sensitive side, then I gradually become more and more attracted. No specific physical characteristics except for maybe being more muscular/stocky. (3816) 4. Even though I had a boyfriend at the time, I found myself crushing big time on a guy I met my freshman year. He was a fellow athlete and classmate. It was a variety of things that made me attracted to him. It was his height, his skin, hair, and eye color, deep voice, self-confidence, humor, intelligence, and friendly, gentlemanly gestures towards me (holding the door open, walking me home in the dark). (8635).

4. The first thing I desire about a guy is their sense of humor and playfulness. But the first thing I notice is their physical attractiveness. I have a type, tall, tan, and athletic looking with self-confidence and with a great head on their shoulders (its like finding a unicorn). I love high energy and someone who is always doing something. I am attracted to the chase of the guy, if they are always in motion and laughing and they flirt but not too much. (3584)

4. I remember finding this one guy really attractive due to his height and really healthy physique. He had a really nice smile, funny, and had the same interests and hobbies as me. He was also very self-confident and had a good social status. He was also always friendly to me and tried to make conversation. I feel like everybody first notices someone due to their looks, but what I think counts the most is that person’s personality. You can be the most attractive person in the world, but if you’re a jerk then I completely forget about your looks. Looks fade away eventually, even the greatest looking people end up ugly one day. Personality stays and counts the most. But still, good looks don’t hurt either. (4259) 4. Thinking about someone I was recently attracted to, some characteristics that initially attracted me would be their physical attributes. Some examples would include facial features, physique, smile, and laugh. The most important factor for me would be an open, kind, respectful, and humorous personality. I think that a great sense of humor is one of my favorite attributes in a guy. If he can make me laugh, I probably find him more attractive. Confidence is also very attractive but to a certain degree. Men who are overconfident and full of themselves are extremely unattractive. Men who are physically fit and take care of their bodies are also very attractive. Taking care of one’s physical and mental care and health is also a sign of responsibility and maturity which is an attractive trait as well. (8090)

4. What attracts me to guys the most would definitely be their sense of humor and overall personality. Physical appearance is also important because you need to feel attracted to them physically but the humor/personality is a make-or-break for me. (5649)

#5. In your opinion, what are the strengths and weaknesses of the opposite sex?


  1. Strengths: Their systemizing and mechanistic skills. Their physical strength to handle heavy material. They are quicker at making decisions and don’t tend to hold grudges therefore are more forgiving.

Weakness: Not so good at communication and expressing their feelings.

5. Men’s weakness is that they do not know how to order food! They struggle with properly communicating what they want and then become upset when their order is wrong. However, their strength is they do not hold grudges. Although a friend can say or do something offensive, men tend to shrug it off and become buddies like nothing happened. (0224

5. The strength of males is how they seem to be protective in tough or scary situations. Their first reaction is to protect the people around them quickly, where as for females it may take longer for them to figure out what to do. A weakness I see that males have is how they do not think things through. Sometimes the way they answer questions come out wrong because they do not think before they speak as much as women do. Also, their actions at times can be dumb because they do not think about the consequences before acting.(8804)

5. Men tend to be less self-critical and I think that is a strength. They are not in touch with their emotions which I think is a weakness and they are not good a communication. (7497) 5) I believe that guy's strengths are being straightforward, driven, and move on from an emotional situation easily. Guys have the tenacity to just say how they feel, and I think that is great because it creates a better relationship with the girl. Weaknesses that guys have are that they are not empathetic and do not pay attentions. They do not take other’s opinions seriously, and I find that not a good thing because it can hurt many people’s feelings.(9745) 5. Some strengths are that men are stereotypically actually physically strong. They also know how to take charge and lead a group. However, when they lead a group, they have to do it their way because they know best, and don’t really like to listen to comments or critique. Think of the stereotypical “we’re lost and need to ask for directions” scenario. And again, men aren’t in touch with their or others’ emotions. (0496)

5. I think that strengths in males is they aren’t afraid to say how they feel or do whatever they desire to do, without worrying too much about if it hurts someone’s feelings or not. I think they’re weakness bounces right off of that in the sense that when they do hurt someone’s feelings, they don’t know how to apologize in the sincerest way because they tend to not understand why their honest actions result in an unintentional offense. (8701)

5. Strengths: protecting, strong, drivenWeaknesses: emotional understanding and availability/maturity, ego (1569)

5. In my opinion, men’s strengths are being straightforward, protective, and able to simplify things. Their weaknesses appear to be difficulty reading emotions and difficulty expressing their own emotions. (8778) 5. I think some of the biggest strengths of the opposite sex are the ability to move past little problems or inconveniences quickly and their ability to admit their anger or frustration. Often times when girls are angry with each other they tend to be passive aggressive towards one another or they just don’t speak to each other and hold onto a grudge. Men on the other hand tend to air their problems out in the open without filtering out their feelings. Their ability to be honest about their anger probably allows them to move past those small bumps in the road faster than girls. A weakness I think they have is that they aren’t as willing as girls to admit their sadness or confusion. I think this might stem from their need to maintain a hyper masculine façade that looks down upon showing weakness or “admitting defeat.” 1524

5. I believe the strengths of men are that they have a strong motivation to succeed. They have confidence and let emotional problems affect them less than woman. Although I hate that about the opposite sex, I am almost jealous because I wish I could shut off my emotions sometimes and just not feel/ignore them. Some weaknesses of the opposite sex seem to be their inability to listen and stay organized. Often times I find that men do not keep their attention in a conversation that they do not care about. I also find that men tend to be extremely messy and tend to put things off until last minute. I think their inability to cope with emotions can also be a weakness because it may cause them not to grow in future relationships with others and most importantly themselves. (6955)

I think that a strength of the opposite sex is that they are able to recover from arguments easily. Even if there are physical blows exchanged, they are still able to be friends with each other afterward. The situation does not seem as serious that way. However, this can become a weakness when I perceive something as a deeper problem, but they do not. (0974)

5. 1 believe that the greatest quality about men is their ability to be confident in everything they do. They usually uphold a sense of dominance that not that many women can display without being judged. A weakness that men have is their lack of being as nurturing as women. 8870

5. The physical strengths of men are a strong jawbone, broad shoulders, tone arms, tone stomach/ abs, body hair but not in excessive amounts. Character strengths of men are their ability to get over situations and not hold grudges (most of the time) when dealing with other men. I like how men have a laid-back kind of attitude and more freely take chances and take charge whether it is dealing with pursuing women or demanding that raise at work. (1481)

5. One strength of males is that they can be more intimidating than women and that they often use this trait to get what they want. I think that men often use their intimidating demeanor as a scare tactic while some don't have that. Another strength of men is their emotional stability. Women can have it pretty hard when it comes to dealing with out emotions especially when our hormone levels are constantly changing. Some weaknesses of men are their lack of empathy for others and their inability to see things from another person's point of view. (8003)

5. Strengths: Physical strength such as manual labor, lifting heavy stuff, moving things etc., they can act as a provider financially, provide protection. Weaknesses: emotionally can’t express themselves openly almost as if they are afraid to appear upset or touched about something, dirty can’t clean up after themselves, huge egos, believe that they are more superior at this or that and always have to one up you, aggressive tend to be more violent, and are clueless about others, can’t tell when someone had a rough day or needs to talk to someone who had a great day and needs to talk. (5945)

5. I believe that the strengths of the opposite sex include the ability to let things go, to be level headed, to think rationally, to forgive themselves and others, the act protectively and to be generally more easy going. I think the weaknesses are their inability to deal with/acknowledge their own emotions, to be overly aggressive, to be somewhat insensitive, to be less vulnerable. (3816)

5. A strength of the opposite sex is that they are usually taller and more muscular, so when I am with them I feel safer than if I was just with women. A weakness of the opposite sex would be that they are not as self-aware as women are and this can lead to a whole host of issues. It can lead them to misunderstand where a woman is coming from or also make it harder for them to understand why she is upset. (38750)

5. Strengths of males are that they quite physically stronger, more mentally and emotionally tough, more self-confident, and driven. Weaknesses of males are that they have a low emotional IQ, always worried about showing and maintaining their manhood, and oblivious in relationships often times. (8635)

5. Strengths: strong, driven, decisive /// weakness: the fact that they think they must hide their emotions from the outside world and their relentless stubbornness. (3584)

5. In my opinion, I think that men are better at navigation and handy-work than women are. I also find it that men handle stressful environments better than women do. They don’t panic as much or at least don’t show that they’re so stressed out. Also, when I’m travelling with a guy, I feel like chances are we won’t get lost. When travelling around with just girls, chances of getting lost are higher. Even though they have some strengths, they can also be very stubborn. They don’t understand emotions too well either.

5. I think that one of men’s strengths is their historical role in society. Men have typically been our leaders, the one’s who take charge and affect change and it is a privilege that they have had for thousands of years. Tying into this, men are physically more capable in many ways with stronger bodies and capabilities in areas like sports. Men also tend to not overthink what other people say or think about them and that can be beneficial to their growth in confidence and overall disposition. Men’s weaknesses on the other hand are suppressing their emotions if they feel hurt or distressed. They unhealthy, often bottle up their feelings and resort to impulsive behavior.(8090)

5. The strengths of men tend to be along the lines of saying whats on their mind and not beating around the bush. They are also good at figuring things out as simply and efficiently as possible, unlike women who tend to overthink. Their weaknesses have to do more with empathy and opening up emotionally as well as communicating well with others.(5649)

#6. Can you think of any instances in which you have personally been treated unfairly by the opposite sex? If so, give a brief description of what happened.


One occasion that has always stood out in which I was treated unfairly by the opposite sex happened in the fourth grade. There was a new student in our classroom and rumors started going around that he had a crush on me. He had told all the boys in our class how much he liked me and how pretty I was. However, that quickly changed when I showed up to school with my hair up, exposing my “big ears” as he called them. As a fourth grader I wasn't too concerned about my image and looks but ever since that day I felt embarrassed and ashamed to show my ears. Till this day I think about what that boy told me and it upsets me because his little comment has stayed in my mind ever since. I don’t think men how serious and traumatic their hurtful comments could stay in woman’s head.

6. I cannot think of a time where I have been personally treated unfairly. (7497)

6. An instance where I felt extremely mistreated was when someone from the opposite sex told me my job and sole responsibility was to do everything for my boyfriend. This particular person told me I need to maintain the house clean, cook for my boyfriend, iron his clothes and make sure anything he needs I provide. (0224)

#6. I have been treated unfairly by the opposite sex in ways that showed a presumed assumption of my physical and mental capabilities just because I am female. There’s been times at the gym when I feel extremely judged when I’m picking up heavier weights and a male stops me and asks me if I meant to grab that specific weight. Or in group projects, every time it’s been a creative project and I’m the only girl in the group, I automatically feel pressure to do majority of the work for the sake of my grade and for the instant tendencies that males have to give that responsibility to women. (8701).

6) An instance when I felt I was mistreated by the opposite sex was when I was expected to wash the dishes. I was once told that since I was a girl, I am suppose to be washing the dishes and doing the chores throughout the house. I find that not necessary because it teaches guys to be lazy. I did not agree on this task of just girls washing dishes because guys can also wash dishes even if it's not the norm. (9745) 6. The last time I was treated unfairly by the opposite sex was when I was inappropriately touched on the bus. (0496)

6. I was treated unfairly in high school when I was in an Easter play for my youth group and we were rehearsing with our youth director and the priest came to watch and he told me I could not play my part because it was a male part and "no one would believe I was a man", so he gave it to a guy and I had to settle for not having a speaking part simply because I was a girl. (38750 6. I was treated unfairly by the opposite sex when I was playing powder-puff football for the school. The guys from the football team were coaching our team, and the girls wanted to scrimmage against the guys for practice, but the guys insisted that it wouldn’t be fair because they were too good for us and we wouldn’t get very fair. I ended up scoring a touchdown on them. (2418) 6. When I was dating someone who realized that he was fearful of developing serious feelings, so he made the decision to cut me off completely and just stop talking to me (thus hurting me) rather than run the risk of hurting himself. I think men sometimes fail to realize that the development of feelings is just as scary for females as it is for males, so when they experience that fear they may have more of a tendency to run from it or shut it down. (1569) 6. There have been instances when I feel that I have been treated unfairly by the opposite sex because they have put their needs before mine. For example, someone I was seeing was afraid of putting a title on our relationship due to fear from a previous relationship, but a title was something that was important to me. (8778) 6.I’ve had many experiences with being treated unfairly by the opposite sex, but one particular instance that happened in an academic setting stands out. I was in AP Chemistry as a senior in high school and a boy from the brother school was also in the class. Just from the way he spoke he clearly had sexist values and one day they manifested into a comment he made to me stating, “Girls are too stupid to be in science and that’s why I don’t want to do this project with you.” He made this comment in a class full of high school girls and our teacher who was also a female and had a Ph.D. 1524 6. I cannot think of a time that a male treated me unfairly. (8804)

6. I have recently been mistreated by my now ex-boyfriend. He had left on a family vacation and had told me he was going to tell his family we were going to get back together after one of our thousands of break ups. While he was gone, I found out he had cheated on me and not told his family anything. He proceeded to break up with me online and ignored me for over 3 months. This was the most disrespectful thing that the opposite sex has ever done to me because while I was feeling all these emotions I got no closure or recognition for the pain I was going through. After giving time to someone and investing feelings into them I believe that they should have enough respect to have a conversation like that in person. Again, this showed me that some men decide to run from problems and feelings and push it under the surface rather than deal with it head on. (6955) 6. One instance where I remember being treated unfairly was in high school, specifically in the marching band. In marching band, we had section leaders, who were assigned to each section in order to supervise and help when the band director could not. Often times, the section leader is supposed to be the most capable player in the section, and even though I was more capable than one of my counterparts, they were chosen instead of me. Even when we were both the section leaders, often times people would ask him for this advice in terms of music instead of me, usually when they were not from our section and did not know about the differences in our abilities.(0974) 6. The last time I was mistreated by the opposite sex was when my ex boyfriend called me dumb because I did not agree with what he said. I did not want to concur with how he spoke to me and said I was done with the fight and wanted to move on, but he was offended by my lack of submissiveness that he offended my intelligence. 6. An instance where I felt unfairly treated because I am a female was at my work. The manager was a man and he would talk to the females and males differently. At work he would tell the females what tasks needed to be done, while at the same time he would have conversations to the men about basketball for a long time, while putting due dates for the assignments of women. Just because a male doesn’t feel like he can talk to women about sports, it doesn’t mean that he can remove responsibility from the males and act in a friendlier and less strict way just because he can relate to them in conversation. (1481) 6. I think that men can be players and often treat women unfairly. I've been the victim of this and it was not a good experience. I was dating a guy from another school and later found out that he'd had a girlfriend the entire time. I stopped talking to him and he couldn't figure out why. (8003) 6. Recently walking down, a city street in SF, I was cat called. This was not the first time usually living in the city catcalling or men making a pass at me happens frequently. However, this man started following my friend and I, saying nasty things and asking personal questions. He followed us for quite a while and when I didn’t respond to him he acted aggressively saying things like, “all you’re good for is putting your mouth around my c*ck.” When I showed lack of interest in him he returned with aggression. However, this man hasn’t been the only man who has acted out because of a lack of interest on my part. In my experience it’s almost like they feel like you owe them something whether it’s a response or more. (5945)

6. A time I was treated particularly well by the opposite sex was my freshman year of college. I was studying really late in the student-athlete academic center. It was a big building and it was almost completely empty and pretty creepy. It was also a solid 10 blocks away from my off-campus dorm, and I felt afraid. I realized when I was packing up my stuff that the guy I had a crush on was the only other one in the building and he was packing up his stuff too. When we left the building, he turned right with me instead of left where I know was the direction of his house. When I asked what he was doing, he said he was going to walk me home because it was late and he wanted to make sure I was safe. I feel that that absolutely had to do with the male gender and their instinct to be protective. (8635)

6. I dated a boy for 5 years and at the very end he cheated on me with my best friend and the girl who outwardly disliked me. After I found out he ignored all my attempts to understand went wrong and after 5 months of me feeling like it was all my fault he finally decided to talk to me and then proceeded to try and get back together. He thought that because we were both going through a difficult time that he had the go-ahead to act out and do what he wanted because he wasn’t in control. (3584)

6. It has happened often where the guys in the group make the final decision of what to do or where to go. I feel like they think that their opinion matters more than female opinions. Regardless of how wrong they are, they won’t admit to being at fault because they are too stubborn to even admit it to themselves. (4259)

6. One instance I can remember was in high school in my Chemistry class I worked with my male friend who sometimes tutored me after school and helped me with concepts I was struggling with. I remember at the end of the year thanking him for his help and asking him if he was planning on signing up for AP Chem. I told him how I wished I had as much ease understanding the material and he responded “Well don’t worry you’re a girl you’re not supposed to understand all of this”, and while I know he wasn’t intentionally trying to make such an offensive statement, it goes to show that these boys are learning this kind of behavior at a young age. To our detriment, they may be carrying on these beliefs for the rest of their lives. (8090)

6. A time I was treated unfairly by the opposite sex was when my ex-boyfriend told me that I “couldn’t talk to any guys” after we broke up but the same rule did not apply to him. He would talk to any girl he wanted to which is a total double standard.(5649)

#7. Can you think of any instances in which you have been treated particularly well by the opposite sex, simply because of your (or their) gender? If so, give a brief description of what happened.

As a woman, I get treated well when men hold doors for me and offer to pay when I go on a date. I also feel more protected when I’m with a man I trust and I can get into places such a nightclubs for free.

  1. An instance where I was treated well for being a woman was when I would go to clubs and get in free or guys buy me drinks. (0224)

7. My boyfriend is someone who treats me extremely well. He always treats me with respect and looks out for my best interest. He genuinely cares about me and my life. He is always making an effort to see me and be involved in my life. He always opens doors for me and pulls out my chairs. He always makes sure that I am comfortable and feel protected. The other night I was walking home and he called me to make sure I wasn’t walking home alone and that when I got home I was safe. (7497)

7) I have been treated particularly well by the opposite sex many times. There has been times when a guy helped me carry heavy objects and paid for my meals. One time, I was in a rush to the airport, and this guy saw me struggling to carry my luggage to my destination and decided to help me carry it. I was really shocked by his actions, but it made me think that guys should always help girls when they are struggling to carry heavy objects. (9745) 7. Men sometimes yell compliments at me or attempt to start conversations with me for the sake of getting my number. In a less overtly creepy way, men will sometimes open the door for me. (0496) 7. There has been a time a have been treated well by a male. Once in downtown LA a man was letting me park in his car wash that was inside a public parking lot for free because he thought I was pretty. It was very weird and I did not accept, and after paying for parking, he kept saying how I didn’t have to pay if I parked in his spot, and how I could have saved money. Although t was a nice gesture in the beginning, after it started to feel like he was trying to make me feel bad for not taking his offer.

7. Yes, I believe that women are given preferential treatment especially in night social-settings. Women are let into parties and bars much more frequently that men, and once inside they are given preferential treatment often by being bought drinks, etc. (1569)

7. It is hard to think of an instance when I have been treated particularly well by the opposite sex because of my gender as a woman. A possible example could be when I visit my grandparents and my grandpa puts my brother to work doing labor in his backyard and allows me to relax. However, while this was nice, this could be taken as my grandpa not believing I am as capable as my brother. (8778)

#7. The instances that I’ve experienced good treatment by the opposite sex has been by my best friend. I’ve had a tendency of becoming close with males quiet easily, obviously situationally depending on who the person or how much we get along with them. This has helped me realize that there is a very optimal opportunity to become close with a male and feel protected, loved and cherished. I haven’t felt that in a relationship yet and have yet to feel like I’ve been treated properly in that situation. (8701). 7.I’ve definitely gotten glimpses of special treatment for being a girl before, but I’ve never experienced a large special act. I have had guys pay for my meal on dates even if I insist on paying half, but that’s as special as it’s gotten. 1524 7. I have been treated well by the opposite sex recently. The guy I am currently seeing made me an amazing dinner and killer margaritas. He complimented me all night. It was nice to feel appreciated and wanted. I feel like men can be providers and caretakers and this was an example of that. (6955) 7. There are instances where people of the opposite sex have helped me carry things, especially with lifting heavy objects. This works perfectly for me because I do not have as much upper body strength as I want, which can be a problem. (0974) 7. Whenever I go out to bars or to clubs in Las Vegas, it always helps to be a female because you can get into places for free while guys have to wait in line or pay a fee. 8870 7. I was recently on a flight where I was sitting in the middle on two men. The man on my left side was an old grumpy man and the man on my right side was a fairly attractive man in his 40s. When I sat down in my seat the man on my right, lets call him Tom, preceded to ask me about myself and acted very sweet to me. I figured that he was just a charming and nice person, as he proceeded to offer me opportunities to get free things from the business he was running. He also switched seats with me so I would have the aisle seat and wouldn’t have to sit in the middle seat, which everyone hates. I saw this as him being a kind person, because he had 3 children, who weren’t present, and saw me as a child myself because I am only 19. He then started flirting with me very strongly by referencing the mile high club, to which I was shocked and preceded to play dumb on what that meant. He then smiled and started explaining it to me to which I mentioned that he had a wife at home. At the end of the flight because I was going to miss my connecting flight he made an announcement on the whole plane that I have a connecting flight and cleared the way for me to make it in time. I do not believe that he would have helped me off the flight or offered me free things if I wasn’t a female. (1481) 7. Being a woman has a few perks. Some men, not all, still believe in chivalry. It's the small things that make a big difference in my opinion. Holding doors open, paying for dinner and other things like that. I don't have one particular instance when I was treated extra nicely but just small acts of kindness help. (8003) 7.When I was out at this bar a gentleman sitting next to me made some small talk barely even an interaction but very polite ended it by saying goodbye. Then later I found out he covered my meal. I’m sure if I wasn’t a woman he wouldn’t have done that. Not only that but the same night I went to this other bar and there was a huge line, the bouncers immediately let us pass the other people in line, now I’m positive that was because I am a woman. (5945) 7. Sometimes this goes the opposite way, and men are nicer to me because I am a woman. I called an Uber to pick me up from the airport recently, and my Uber driver immediately got out of his car to put my bags in the trunk and was very friendly towards me, instead of being annoyed he had to put them there. I know that this could just be part of his job or him trying to get a 5-star rating, but I don't know if he would have been as eager to put my suitcases in his trunk, say if I had been a muscular guy who was 6'3", or if he would have just assumed I could do it myself and not gotten out of his car to help. (38750)

7. There are many instances that I have been treated well by the opposite sex. I value the little things like men opening doors for me or the man taking my suitcase and packing it on the car. Yes, I am capable of doing these things myself but it is nice that there is someone who wants to do them for me to be doing something nice. Going out of their way to do a kind action. (3584).

  1. 1. 7. Because I am a female, whenever I go out on a date, everything is paid for, and I never touch a door handle, and I usually make the decisions as to what I want to do or how long to stay, etc.

7) I feel like a lot of times I get more attention or better service from males than from females. I feel like men will start random conversation with me than females will. For instance, when I go to the gym I will never be approached by another woman, but have been many times by men for just casual talk. Also, when we go out to eat and sit at the bar with just girls, the workers tend to give us a lot of free food and drinks than when with males in the group as well. (4259) 7. Some things that come to mind would be men holding the door open for me or opening my car door. I guess these are just natural gender norms that I experience as a woman. Often when I arrive to a line at the same time as a male they allow me to go ahead of them or even pay for my meal. (8090) 7. There have been many times where I have been treated particularly well by the opposite sex because of my gender. One example would be when a random guy has paid for my food in line (at subway for example) or when guys help me move a bunch of my really heavy stuff without asking for anything in return.(5649) #8. Describe an instance, or instances, when you have been rejected by someone of the opposite sex to whom you were attracted. How did they reject you? Was their behavior inconsiderate, rude or insensitive? How did it make you feel? How might they have done it in a more considerate way?8. I do not think there has been an instance where I have put myself out there with a guy and been rejected. I am usually not one to gain feelings with guys who have not shown any interest in me. Although I have gained stronger feelings for some people than they have for me I was aware of that so I did not share them and began to distance myself. (7497)8. I had been talking/dating this guy for about 3 months, but we had known each other for almost 5 years. We seemed to be going pretty well when one day he just stopped calling and texting me. I did not hear from him for about 2 months when I finally heard he had gotten back with his ex-girlfriend. I thought it was extremely inconsiderate that he just ghosted me. I would have preferred that he’d be honest and just tell me I still have feelings for someone else, rather than leave me wondering what went wrong. He could have called or even texted me as long as he would have been honest. (0224) 8) I have been rejected before through text message, and that was not a great way to reject someone. I felt that was rude because rejecting someone through text message. He did not have the nerves to tell me in person, and that made me feel worthless. I thought he knew better, but he decided to end everything over text message. He did even call me to talk this over, which was another thing that I found inconsiderate. I think if he called me, I would have taken this rejection a little better, but text messaging was just unbelievable. (9745) 8. I’ve never been rejected before, but I have rejected someone before so maybe I’ll talk about that instead. I met this guy at a bonfire and we talked and flirted for a bit, but he got way too forward too fast and it was very creepy. Unfortunately I had already given him my number after I realized this, and my phone couldn't block callers. He kept texting me and following me around in person to ask me to hang out with him even though I wasn’t interested. What made this really creepy was he would do this in the form of asking me to "piggyback ride" him. Every single time he saw me he literally begged me to do this and it was very, very uncomfortable. When we met in person I would just give an excuse about how I was busy and had to go and thus couldn’t hang out with him, and with texts I would do the same thing but eventually I would just ignore them. If I or any of my friends saw him coming in our direction, I would literally dive under tables so he wouldn’t see me. (0496) 8. I had been talking to this guy for two months when he ghosted me. He cut off all contact and completely stopped talking to me and when I sent him an angry drunken text a few months later describing how I had been hurt and I would have appreciated if he had had the guts to just tell me he didn't want to see me anymore. He didn't reply, but he has watched every single one of my snapchat stories since he ghosted me and continues to like my pictures on Instagram. I don't get it and at this point I think it's childish and rude since I feel like he's trolling me because there's no other logical explanation for it. (38750) 8. In middle school I had a crush on a guy who had a crush on my best friend. He rejected me indirectly by always paying constant attention to her when she was around and making me feel invisible. I knew he didn't mean to, but it was definitely somewhat insensitive. I think being rejected is always hard because its nothing but personal, so it hurts like crazy. I guess he could have tried to be considerate or a little more discrete about his feelings for her when I was around (1569)

8. I was rejected by a guy who initially showed a lot of interest in me, but stopped as soon as I seemed interested as well. He rejected me by completely cutting me off, such as not replying to my texts and being very short if we ran into each other in person. His behavior was rude and insensitive, especially considering we had been friends before. It made me very disappointed in our friendship and could have been handled better with clear communication. (8778) 8. I have not yet gone after someone I find attracted, therefore I have not felt rejected by someone I find attractive.(8804)

8.He rejected me over text message and his behavior was quite considerate for how awful of a person he is. It made me feel upset, but also relieved that I finally had an answer of if he liked me or not. 1524

#8. I’ve been rejected in instances that where I had high hopes for something, but not in a sense that I’ve approached someone and they’ve rejected me in a way that has to do with a conversation where I put myself out there to ask them out. It was a rejection that I asked what we were, and my head was in a complete different place than he was that led to me feeling like I put myself out there and got rejected for doing so. It wasn’t rude, but it was definitely inconsiderate in a way that I felt as though he should have told me before I felt the need to establish that thin line. It made me feel as though I shouldn’t invest time into relationships unless I know there is complete reciprocation. I think a more considerate way would be for him to be more in tune with the way that I was communicating with him and understanding that my feelings were going in the opposite direction as him, but at the same time I can’t expect the opposite sex to understand what I’m feeling from observation. (8701).

8. I was recently rejected by my ex boyfriend. He decided he no longer wanted to be with me. I think their behavior was rude, insensitive, and inconsiderate because it was done online. It made me feel disrespected, ugly and worthless. He could have been more considerate by doing it to my face in person instead of leading me on and then ignoring me for months. (6955)

8. I have not been rejected by someone by the opposite sex because I have never told someone of the opposite sex that I was attracted to them because of my low self esteem at the time. However, I have friends that have been rejected by the opposite sex, and they have had varying experiences. Most of my friends have been let down lightly, being told that they would want to stay friends and that they do not feel the same way. (0974)

8. An instance where I was rejected by the opposite sex was when I wanted to hang out with a boy that I liked after an event, but he was nonchalant about seeing me afterwards. He walked away from me and pretended like he was in a rush to be somewhere else. I text messaged him asking what his plans were and he never responded to me. I was very offended by how he acted. I would have appreciated a response even if it was a no. 8870

8. A few years ago there was a young man who I frequently talked to in and class and we would continuously make eye contact with each other. I believed that he liked me, so one day I asked for his number and if he wanted to hang out sometime later on. He said yes and put this number in my phone, to which I was very happy about. Right after this happened he proceeded to tell me about this girl that he likes. I was shocked, upset, and felt stupid, but I tried to hide those feelings and started to ask him questions about her and wished him luck in pursuing her. A few minutes later when I got in my dorm room he texted me, and all the messages were about the girl. I believe that he knew I liked him and maybe this was his way or sending me the message that he wasn’t interested, but it seems like a bit much in my opinion to continuously talk about another girl to a girl who just asked for your phone number. Also him and I weren’t even friends, so it made me upset that he decided to spill his whole heart out to me about her. I believe that the more considerate way to have dealt with me and my feelings to have not mentioned the girl at all, but rather say that he is interested in hanging out and getting to know me better as a friend. (1481)

8. One instance when a man rejected me was sophomore year by a friend. I was very attracted to him but we were such good friends and he didn't want to jeopardize the friendship we had built over the past couple years. He was very nice about it and we're still friends today without any sort of tension between us. (8003)

8. In third grade there was this popular boy every girl in the grade had a crush on including me. Girls started going up to him telling him they liked him and he would smile and act nice towards them. So I thought if it worked for them it must work for me. Well I was absolutely wrong because when I went up to him and I said I liked him under my breath he straight up started laughing wildly and ran up to his friends saying that I liked him. That was a low day in elementary school for me, I definitely felt insecure after that. If he just left off the laughing part or running his to friends or really any of that sweet moment. (5945)

8. My freshman year of high school, a guy I really liked was sitting with me at a football game. He had told me how much he liked me and was holding my hand. Homecoming was coming up in about two weeks, and I was hoping he was going to ask me to be his date. I guess he sort of did, but it went a little more something like this, “So…Homecoming is coming up. I’m planning on asking this girl Jordan, but if she says no, would you want to go with me?” It was the biggest slap in the face I have ever experienced from a guy (thank goodness for that). Completely setting me aside as a backup choice was inconsiderate, rude, and insensitive. It made me feel like I wasn’t good enough to be his date, and if anything he would have to settle for me. (8635)

8. I remember one night I went out and me and this boy were flirting and it was fun and harmless and I was having a good time. An hour passes and we haven’t had the chance to really talk so I go up to chat a little more and at this point he turns to me and says, “no … sorry, but like your blond friend…” and I laugh to myself and I was just like woah. My feelings weren’t hurt because he decided he was more attracted to my friend than me, I was just taken aback that this guy felt so empowered and confident to dismiss another person like that instead of just having a friendly conversation and saying, “hey I think I would like to get to know your friend more” instead of just moving me to the side. (3584).

8) I don’t remember ever being rejected but I remember instances of rejecting others. This one time I was walking around a park with my family and a fairly good looking guy came up to me and tried to talk to me. He kept telling me how I was the most beautiful girl that he had ever met and really wanted my number. I told him I had a boyfriend and awkwardly tried walking away. I felt bad but I really wanted to get out of there. (4259)

8. I haven’t personally experienced any dramatic rejection but I know many of my friends have and I have seen how difficult it can be. One friend I really cared about had been hooking up with this guy she liked and he told her how much he was into her and wanted to take the relationship to another level but the whole time he was also hooking up with another girl and telling her the same things. It was a slap in the face for both girls and I really felt for my friend in this dramatic situation. This guy really screwed her over and betrayed her trust. (8090)

8. This was a long time ago but in elementary school I remember telling one of the guys in my grade that I liked him and his response was “oh well I don't like you back”. I remember thinking he could have been a lot nicer with the way he told me! (5649)

Imagine that you have known someone of the opposite sex for about a month. You have dated this person several times, but so far there hasn't been any kind of physical intimacy (holding hands, kissing, etc.) between the two of you. Now, you are out on a date with this person again.

How would you try to influence this person in each of the following circumstances:

#9. Situation 1: The date has been going very well and you feel very physically attracted to this person. How would you influence this person to become physically intimate, and to go as far sexually as you wanted to go?

9. I would get closer to him and put my hand on his knee or arm. If he would still not get the hint, I would just slowly start grabbing his hand. Then I would wait for him to initiate a kiss, but if he didn’t by the end of the night I would kiss his cheek. (0224)

9. I would move closer to them or initiate casual contact like brushing his arm or maybe grab onto his arm. (7497)

9) I would start making physical eye contact to make him know that I want to become physically intimate. Before everything gets into action, I would ask them if they are okay with being in intimate because consent is the key in all relationships. It would not be a good thing to pressure someone to be intimate because if you do get intimate, you would not feel comfortable.On the other hand, if the he does feel like being intimate, than I would be flirty and start getting close to him. From there, it will just be a natural gesture in what will happen if he decides to kiss me or not. (9745)

9. If I knew a male for about a month, and we have gone on several dates and there has still been no intimacy but I find him very physically attracted, I would ask him if he also finds me attractive or not because I find him attractive. If he does, then I would just ask why he has not tried to hold my hand or kiss me, and that would answer my questions and maybe lead to it actually happening.(8804)

9. It would be time to turn up the flirts. Sometimes some men aren’t as forward as the stereotype, so in addition to flirting I might have to make the first move when the time is right. Since we haven’t really been physically intimate before this date I would probably only go as far as a kiss this time. (0496)

9. If I was on a date with this person again, I would try to kiss him. Depending on what we were doing on the date what influence when and how I would try to initiate this. i think I would wait for a moment when we were alone or had some privacy and stare into their eyes and then close mine and move my head towards him to kiss him. If we were in a car this would probably be easy to do when he was about to drop me off at home. If this went well and the kissing was reciprocated, I would probably start unbuttoning his shirt or tugging at it to see if he wanted to go further, and judging from his response, take it farther or stop there. (38750) 9. I would probably hold his hand or give him a kiss on the cheek at some point throughout the date to signal that I was interested physically to ensure that that was a clear aspect of the relationship and that we were on the same page. later I would suggest that we go back to one of our places and see how he responds, and then probably talk to him about how I felt about him as an explanation for me desire or trust to be intimate for him (1569)

9. I would probably try to make basic physical contact with him, such as putting my hand on his knee or holding his hand. After that I would wait for some sort of response and let him initiate any further contact. If he did initiate further contact and it became more intimate, I would later verbally express what type of physical affection I was ok with at this point. (8778)

9.I would probably initiate some type of casual contact, like brushing his arm or touching his hand. I might even initiate holding hands. I probably wouldn’t initiate a kiss or anything further than that though. If I was comfortable enough with the person I would probably even ask why we hadn’t kissed yet. 1524

#9. When I feel sexual tension, I hint in gestures that I brush up against him, get closer, twiddle my fingers by his hands if we ever get close or seem to approach a “moment”. I wouldn’t want to put myself far out there just in case I’m reading the signs wrong, but I think sometimes the opposite sex needs a bigger sign that we’re interested than we think. (8701).

9. If the date was going well and I was physically attracted to the person I was with, I would try to look for cues to how he was feeling. If I felt we were on the same page I would just go for it. I would flirt and probably move closer to that person to the point where I could eventually lock eyes with them and go in for a kiss! If I was unsure, I would drop low-key hints that I was attracted to him and see how he reacted to that. (6955)

If I wanted to be physically intimate with someone, I would ask them if it was okay. I would not want to pressure them into being intimate with me if they are not comfortable, and I want it to be consensual. I would also start off with hand holding, and then occasionally progress towards being more intimate. I do not mind if it takes more time, and if the situation arises where the feeling is not mutual, I would rather that we had taken it slow. (0974)

9. For the scenario, I would instigate the first flirtatious gesture myself. I would start rubbing his arm or sit close to him, anything to make it obvious it is time for him to kiss me. 8870

9. If I was on a date and I wanted the intimacy level to continue to process I would be touching his shoulder/ arm and knee. I would laugh at things he was saying and I would be making flirty remarks to things that he would say. I would also change the tone of my voice so it sounded sexier instead of the type of voice that you use to talk to a friend. I would also be staring in his eyes, making eye contact and holding it, trying to see if he maintains it as well, hoping that it leads to kissing. I would make sure to be sitting close to him and positioning my body facing him. (1481)

9. I would initiate things slowly and see how comfortable he feels holding hands or kissing before initiating any other sort of intimacy. I would only go as far as he wanted and would not try to control the situation too much or make him feel uncomfortable. (8003)

9)I would probably just look at him, smile and laugh at what he’s saying and try to be funny. I’ve never made a move physically; I usually just wait until he does. (5945)

9. Given the first situation, I think the first step is to ask the other person how they feel about you. If it’s a response you’re happy with, then start to get closer to them physically and see where that takes you I suppose. (8635)

9. I like to think I am a fairly blunt person so in a scenario like this I would ask the guy why don’t you just kiss me already? The worst he can say is no and, my ego might be a little bruised; I will survive and be able to move on instead of playing a guessing game. Assuming that goes well and gauging how far I wasn’t the level of physical intimacy to go I would also be vocal in telling them where I felt the line should be drawn at that time. (3584).

9. If I was physically attracted to this person and wanted to show it I would probably trying holding his hand and playing with it. I might also try making more eye contact to get a feel of what he’s feeling. Once we are on the same page I’d probably lean in for a kiss. (4259)

9. For me, eye contact is very intimate. I would probably try to engage in more eye contact to show I’m really interested in them and that I want them to kiss me. I would maybe find a way to hold their hand or brush mine past theirs as an indication that I wanted to hold hands. I would maybe kiss them on the cheek to let them know the affection I have for them. (8090)

9. I would influence this person by maybe scooting closer to them if we were sitting next to each other or I would try and accidentally touch hands with them to try and get them to hold my hand. I would also act very interested in what they have to say and laugh a bit more than usual and lean into them while laughing. (5649)

#10. Situation 2: The date has been going well, but you do not feel particularly physically attracted by this person. However, you can tell that this person is really turned on by you. Still, you know you're not interested in physical intimacy, and/or the subsequent involvement or commitment that might follow. How would you influence this person to avoid becoming sexual?

10. I would probably make up an excuse of why I needed to leave or have my friend call me and say that she needed me. I would try and leave the situation in a polite way but not drag out the date any further.(7497)

10. I would avoid eye contact, shrug off any advancements he would make, and keep distance between us. I would also emphasize that fact that we are just friends hanging out. (0224)

10) I would say I am not ready for any sexual relationship, and would like to take this relationship slowly to see where things take us. I think that the key would be having less dreamy eye contacts and not getting too close to the guy because if you get too close to the guy, they might feel that you are turned on by them. It is best to be clear that you are not interested sexually because sometimes the guy may not understand and will still take things to the next level. If you are confident in what you say about this sexual relationship, than he will most likely respect what you say. (9745) 10. Say things like, “It’s cool that we’re friends and can just hang like this” and stuff like that. Body language would be closed off and away, less eye contact, shrugging away from touch. If worse comes to worse I might have to be explicit and just tell the person I’m not attracted to them to their face if they’re too oblivious. I’d rather not do this because stereotypically, men do not take rejection well. (0496) 10. If I was not attracted to the person, but he obviously was attracted to me, I would let him know exactly how I feel. I would not want to lead him on and possibly have him try something sexual with me if I did not feel the same way. I would rather be honest and let him know that I do not feel the same way he does about our relationship. It would be hard because I do not want to hurt someone’s feelings, but it is always better to be honest, you just need to know how to say things.(8804)

10. I would try to create distance between me and this person. If they stepped closer to me, I would back up and slowly step backwards. However, I am really bad at this and if someone I don't want to kisses me, I will kiss them back because I would feel too awkward to say no because I wouldn't want to hurt their feelings. (38750) 10. I would make it clear that I wanted to remain in public places to avoid any further intimacy (such as not wanted to go back to either of our places, or somewhere where I knew that we would be alone together) and then just try to be clear and emphasize my enjoyment in spending time with him and talking to him such that there is an emphasis away from the physical aspects of our relationship. (1569)

10. I would not initiate any physical contact and shy away a bit when he did. If he initiated going back to a private place where there would be an opportunity for us to be more intimate, I would verbally voice that I was not interested in this type of relationship, but let him know that I enjoy hanging out as friends. (8778)

10.I would start using the term “friend” a lot more often in reference to the boy. I probably would also pull away from any physical contact that way he doesn’t get the wrong idea. 1524

10. I am really bad at saying no. When I have been in a situation where someone is interested in me and I am not interested in them, I tend to make up an excuse to leave and usually avoid them and their texts in the future. This I realize is a little hypocritical of me considering when guys have done this to me, my world is over for a week. (6955)

10. I would make it very clear verbally that I am not interested sexually. I do not want to rely on nonverbals because I have friends who are of the opposite sex who have told me that they do not understand nonverbals. I do not want to risk any possibility of miscommunication. (0974)

10. If I do not want someone to execute any sexual activities upon me, I would start talking about my ex boyfriend or start talking about someone I am currently interested in. If I really have to, I would lie and talk about how I am not ready to be with anyone or have a desire to pursue any form of relationship. 8870

#10. I would try to ease on the flirting and make most conversations very friend-like. If he were to make physical gestures, I’d either make a facial expression or response that is very apparent that I’m not interested in physical intimacy. I would hope to eventually rack up the nerve to tell him to not get physical with me if it crosses a certain line and he isn’t getting my other clues. (8701)

10. If I were on a date with a man who I was not interested in, I would avoid all psychical contact. I wouldn’t hold his hand or touch his leg, even if I was talking to him in a platonic way. I wouldn’t want physical touch to be interpreted by him as him having a chance with me. I would also change the tone of my voice to that of uninterested and not a flirtatious tone. If we were sitting next to each other I would be positioned in a way that I was facing forward instead of turning my body towards him. While I am not facing him I would be looking around at other guys, and making it noticeable that I am checking them out instead of paying attention to him. (1481)

10. I would first do the head turn/ cheek move if he tried to go in for a kiss that I didn't feel comfortable with. If that doesn't work, I would tell him that I'm not comfortable with any sort of physical intimacy and say that I hope he respects my decision. I wouldn't do anything I was uncomfortable/ not ready for. (8003)

10) I’m horrible at avoiding it, I try to act polite and eventually he usually does try to make a move and then I just let him kiss me and then I look at my phone and pretend I received a text and make up an excuse to leave. Then I end it on and a thank you and refer to him as bud. (5945)

10. Given the second situation, I would influence this person to avoid becoming sexual by using pretty convincing body language that makes it clear I’m not interested in things going in that direction. (8635)

10. I like to think I am a fairly blunt person so in a scenario like this I would ask the guy why don’t you just kiss me already? The worst he can say is no and, my ego might be a little bruised; I will survive and be able to move on instead of playing a guessing game. Assuming that goes well and gauging how far I wasn’t the level of physical intimacy to go I would also be vocal in telling them where I felt the line should be drawn at that time. (3584)

10. If I’m on a date and am not physically attracted to the guy but know that he is attracted to me I’d feel very uncomfortable. Before he tried to make a move I’d probably say how I’m not feeling too well or have a family emergency and really have to go home. I would feel bad to straight up tell them that I’m not interested. This way I won’t make them feel too bad. (4259)

10. I would probably friend zone them politely. I would likely tell them how much I care about their friendship and what a reliable and loyal friend they are. If they tried to become physical I would tell them that I really cared about them as a friend and don’t want to ruin the friendship that we have. (8090)

10. I would influence this person by using body language. For example, I might keep my hands together and away from them (i.e. clasped in my lap) or I may scoot a bit further away (especially if you notice them starting to make a move). (5649)


For each of the following sentence fragments, complete the sentence, and, if you wish, add a few more sentences to complete your thought. Do not include the sentence stem in your response--only your answer to it.

#11. In general, it seems that the opposite sex has a tendency to become "insanely" jealous when...

11. There are other guys talking to their girlfriend or showing some type of interest in her. (0224)

11. Other guys ask me to dance with them

11. another man gets the girl he likes.(8804)

11. They see their girlfriend talking to another guy that they do not like or is better than them. (9745)

11. You talk to people of the other sex (0496) 11. ... he see's another man flirting with his girl (1569)

…he watches you pay more attention to another guy than to him. (8778) #11. …you talk to them about other guys’ physiques/personality traits that you like or they see you becoming close friends with another male. (8701)

11.they see someone else near something they presume is their “property” or “territory” 1524

11. Other guys flirt with me in front of them. (6955)

11. You have close guy friends. (7497)

11. ...they see a woman they are interested in interacting with other men closely, especially if they view this man as a threat. (0974) 11. I compare them to other guys.8870

11. Men seem to become insanely jealous when a woman decides to go out with her female friends for the night to bars or parties without him. Even though men want to be able to have the freedom to have nights out with their male friends. (1481)

11. ... they see "their girl" talking to another attractive guy that they don't know very well. (8003)

11) other men are interested in me in either a romantic or physical way. (5945)

11) you talk to someone else that is potentially someone that likes you/someone you could be interested in (8635)

11) I hang out with my guy friends for about the same or more amount of time I spend with them. (3584).

11) The opposite sex talks to me or if I hang out with guys. (4259)

11. other guys stare at you or compliment you (8090)

11. the girl they like begins talking to another guy and they feel threatened. (5649)

#12. When it comes to initiating sexuality for the first time, the opposite sex...

12. tends to be just as nervous (0224)

12. Lean forward for a kiss and tend to get very touchy

12. can get too pushy too quick.(8804)

Should ask for consent before taking it to the next level. (9745) 12. Is sometimes not as forward as the stereotype, but if we were going with the stereotypical “man’s man,” then they can move just way too fast without considering the woman’s feelings (0469)

12. wants the process to move a lot faster than the woman wants it. (6553) 12. usually makes the first move (8090) 12. ...should be more verbal when asking the woman what is ok. (8778) 12. is more forward in initiating. 1524 12,. Tends to kiss you. (6955) 12. Usually makes the first move. (7497) 12 .... is more aggressive and eager to push those boundaries. (0974) 12. should put his arm around me and make the first move 8870 12. Males are good at initiating sexuality, because many times men are expected to take charge in such situations. (1481) 12. ... is often very forward. Men tend to take the reigns on initiating sex, or so it has been in my experiences. (8003) 12. is straight forward and aggressive about their intentions. (5945) 12. gets pretty serious pretty quick. (8635)

#12. …takes most hints the wrong way or gets too excited the second you guys kiss. (8701)

12. Will make the first move and be more upfront and bold about initiating sex (3584).

12. Is more likely to try to initiate the first move.(4259)

12. always makes the first move and tend to get noticeably nervous before doing so, giving us a hint when something is about to happen. (5649)

#13. The opposite sex seems clueless about...

13. the female anatomy and her sex drive (0224)

What the women feels about a difficult situation or concern.(9745) 13. Emotions, non-explicit communicative cues (0496)

13. our emotions and why we like to communicate more about them. (6553)

13. women’s menstrual cycle.(8804)

13. Period cramps

13. …connecting emotional cues to their cause (8778).

13. the menstrual cycle 1524 13. how much effort girls put into their appearance (8090)

13. Emotions and feelings. (6955) #13. …the emotional aspects and the right way to satisfy girls (in the simplest ways). (8701) 13. ... emotions. (0974)13. emotions. (7497)13. The female anatomy when it comes to sex. They have a different sex drive from women 8870 13. Men are clueless about the amount of effort that women expect them to put into having a successful relationship. Most men do not continue to put in the effort as the relationship progresses, which is something we can especially see in marriages when men get too “comfortable” and the romance and excitement dies. (1481) 13. ... how to effectively communicate with women. They aren't very good at explaining their emotions or connecting with others on an emotional level, which can make communication more difficult. (8003) 13. the female beauty routine. (5945)

13. how to talk to a girl when she’s upset (8635)

13. Women want to be surprised with flowers every now and again! (3584).

13. why women get emotional in the first place. They think we're being overdramatic about everything.(4259)

13. understanding when girls are upset about something. (5649)

#14. Being romantic is something that the opposite sex...

14. tends to lack and not understand (0224)

Should understand and take seriously.(9745) 14. Does not care about (0496)

14. Can either be very good or need to put more effort on 14. should be because it helps them be more attractive.(8804)

14. ... should enjoy and want to bring about and hopefully take part in it (1569)

14. should put more effort into and engage in quite often (8090) 14. …should enjoy for both themselves and their partner. (8778) 14. can be good at, but it is not common 1524 #14. …is either completely clueless about or shocks any girl when they even remember to bring roses to a date or pay for dinner. (8701) 14. Is bad at (6955) 14. ... does not do as well as most women expect. (0974) 14. Can be good at, but they either overthink or under-think the standards of fulfilling their significant other’s needs 8870 14. The opposite sex is only good at being romantic within the first stage of the relationship, and then less effort is put in. In the “chase” of a relationship a man appears to be fully invested and putting in time and resources to make the female interested in him, but once he feels that he has her, the effort diminishes. (1481) 14. ... is sometimes good at it with hints and clues about when to do it. Some guys are naturally more romantic than others but some need hints from girls as to when they want more romance. (8003) 14. is bad at. (7497) 14. generally, develops with age or emotional maturity. (5945) 14. really only seems to do when the relationship is exclusive/official (8635) 14. can be surprisingly great at (3584) 14. Can actually be really good at. When a guy really likes you I feel like he goes out of his way to please you. (4259)

14. is not very good at unless they REALLY like the girl and are really trying to impress them. (5649)

#15. Sometimes it seems that the opposite sex puts their boyfriend/girlfriend through a series of relationship "tests" by...

15. seeing how you act when other men fair with you (0224)

Testing them by asking them to do certain things such as having sex with them. (9745) 15. “If you love me you would suck my dick” (0496)

15. Inviting them to meet their family/friends

15. forgetting their birthday.(8804)

  1. 15....seeing how they react when another man is flirting with them. (1333)15. introducing her to his family. (6553)

#15. …bringing them around their friends, seeing how they take dates into the matter of their own hands, how they are around a setting with multiple girls and how he shares his attention, and eventually bringing them around family. (8701) 15. …introducing them to friends and family or inviting them to travel or go on vacation with their family. (8778) 15. testing how calm and collected they can be in a variety of different situations 1524 15. Seeing if they get jealous when other girls are involved and by not answering your texts right away. (6955) 15. ... determining how loyal they are, which can include how they talk to other men. (0974) 15. seeing how they would react to petty situations 8870 15. Men test women in relationships by remaining boyfriend and girlfriend for a long time of the relationship before asking the woman to marry her. While the relationship status remains boyfriend/ girlfriend man will sometimes ask about her previous relationships. (1481) 15. ... having them prove their love through sometimes meaningless tasks. Girls, specifically, have their boyfriends prove their love or devotion by having them prove they know their likes/ dislikes or how dedicated they are to the relationship. (8003)15. flirting with other girls (8090) 15. testing how far the significant other will go or cater to their needs. (5945) 15. Bringing her around his guy friends. (7497)15. asking questions they may sneakily find information from (8635) 15. Introducing you to their friends, introducing you their parents/family and by going on vacation with them to see how well you work together alone (3584). 15. By introducing you to their family. From my experience, family is very important and their opinions matter a lot. (4259)

15. seeing if they care enough to be the first one to text/call them. (5649)

#16. The opposite sex seems to support equality for the sexes except when it comes to...

16. sexuality! When women have multiple sex partners, they are considered whores or sluts, but men can sleep with as many people as they’d like. (0224) 16. sexuality or money. (7497) Having a better job or being stronger.(9745) 16. They just don't, stereotypically

#16. …anything domestic, sports.(8701)

16. equal pay.(8804)

16. career or job position. Men always want to make more money than women. (6553)

16. Women not being good at cooking, cleaning, or taking care of children

16. women being sexually liberal (8090) 16. …issues that regard the woman’s body, such as abortion. (8778)

16. anything domestic, such as cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children 1524 16. Sports. (6955) 16. ... threatening their own status, especially when it comes to their capabilities. (0974)16. Sports or drinking. Guys think that girls cannot drink as much as them (8870) 16. Men support equality when it deals with women making the first move. It seems that men find it attractive when a woman can confidently ask a man out, and they claim that its not only the job of a guy to ask out the female.(1481) 16. ... sexuality. Men are allowed to have as many sexual partners as they please without getting judged while women are called vulgar names for having too many partners. It's a complete double standard. (8003) 16) higher job title. (5945)

16. physical strength (8635) 16. Women having to have the ability to cook and clean, which is more important than having a career of their own (3584)16. Job titles and power in all forms(4259) 16. physical activities.(5649)

#17. Possessiveness is something that the opposite sex...

17. deals with frequently (0224)

Should not take seriously because it can lead to problems in a relationship.(9745) 17. Is more guilty of than they realize (0496)

17. has with their girlfriends.(8804)

17. struggles with and have trouble controlling. (6553). 17. tends to have. (7497) 17. is just as guilty of as women (8090) 17. …may have trouble controlling if there is not trust in the relationship. (8778)

17. often turns into aggression 1524 #17. …something that comes naturally but can be unnecessarily exaggerated when the person doesn’t feel secure or stable in the relationship. (8701) 17. Needs to work on because it leads to jealousy 17. Is a lot of. (6955) 17. ... takes part in often. (0974) 17. Secretly has. Everyone gets jealous but something needs to instigate the jealous for it to come out 8870 17. Possessiveness is something that men are guilty of. (1481) 17. ... needs to work on. Men tend to view women as objects of possession while women view men as another partner/ friend. (8003) 17. should never feel if you are in a healthy, communicative relationship. (3816) 17) rely on or embody when they are insecure. (5945)

17. has when they feels the relationship is being threatened by a third party (8635)

17. Definitely can have issues with. Especially when friendly conversations with other men or being out in social settings. Making sure that everyone around knows that you are "their woman", which is a total turnoff (3584).

17. Has was too much of. A relationship should feel like a relationship, not like having a third parent. (4259)

17. displays quite often. Men are usually a lot more openly possessive towards women, as they get angry when they see them with another guy. They often feel the need to mark their territory by making a public scene displaying their affection. (5649)

#18. When it comes to physical attractiveness, the opposite sex...

18. values it highly in women (0224) Believes that they should get on the same level as the other person. (9745)

18.Does not put in the effort, usually. And when they attempt to, it’s usually just hair gel and Axe body spray. (0496) 18. values it fairly highly in mate selection (1569)

18. …finds it important and often tries to match it with their own. (8778) 18. Can be good looking without even trying 18. values it highly.(8804)

18. is hit or miss 1524 18. tends to judge a girl off of it. (7497) #18. …relies heavily on it and makes that the decision point on deciding to get to know the girl any further than her outside appearance. (8701) 18. Can be very attractive (6955) 18. ... puts women into different categories as to whether or not they'll pursue anything with them, and physical attractiveness is an important factor. (0974) 18. Should present himself with good hygiene 8870 18. Males are physically attractive when they have a strong jawbone, broad shoulders, a deep voice, and are taller than 5’10”. (1481) 18. ... scores high if they are athletic and physically fit. Also, brown hair and light eyes are nice. (8003) 18) has generally a friendlier disposition. (5945)

18. rates this as more important than other attributes (8090)18. does not have to try nearly as hard as females do (8635) 18. Men value the physical attractiveness of women over anything else, beauty over brains. Men have a desirable physical appearance when they are strong, tall, with a prominent jaw line and are fit. (3584). 18. Look a lot better with an athletic physique. (4259) 18. takes this into consideration before anything else when looking for a love interest. (5649)

#19. Money and status is are things that the opposite sex...

19. find highly important (0224) Should value because it is important in the future if you have a family to raise.(9745) 19. Values quite a bit, but for themselves. I don’t think men particularly care if their prospective partners have money and status, but of course that’s a bonus. (0496) 19. thing is important.(8804)

19. ...are impressed by, but also intimidated by (1569)

19. …appreciate and try to match with their own status (8778)

19. take for granted 1524 19. Values and prioritizes #19. …tend to be important but people deny that it will make or break their decision on dating someone. (8701) 19. Value (6955) 19. ... should take into consideration when it comes to their perceived attractiveness. (0974) 19. Should consider. It is not an important factor, but when it comes to raising a family, women always factor in how the other partner is going to be able to contribute to support a family. 8870 19. Money and status are something that men in society appear to thrive for and use this as an advantage to get the attention of the attractive or high status female. It also allows them to have their pick of many females and to continue to meet new attractive females. (1481) 19. ... cares a lot about. Men see their income and status as a symbol of their manhood. (8003) 19. prioritize. (7497) 19) seems to be driven by. (5945) 19. is usually more responsible for achieving (8635)19. really cares about (8090) 19. Value for their future. They desire/are driven by a lot of money and a high social status (3584). 19. Care for a lot. I feel like men are more money driven than women. (4259)

19. find very important and often times tend to put first in a relationship. (5649)

#20. It hurts me most when the opposite sex...

20. fails to treat me with respect, see me as inferior, and belittle my feelings. (0224) Lies and does not respect me. (9745) 20. Sexually objectify women in any way (0496) 20. It hurts me most when the opposite sex insults a woman because of her looks. I think that men don’t realize how hurtful it is when they say a snide remark about a woman’s appearance. In my experience, I have had my feelings hurt when a male friend insults another girl, even if I don’t know her. It makes me wonder what they think about me, even when the relationship is completely platonic. (0632)

20. Offends and disrespects me #20. …tears apart the appearance of a woman or thinks that their body is something to use for sexual pleasure. (8701) 20. ...fails to treat me with respect and to see me for the individual that I am, no matter the situation (1569) 20. doesn't at least try and empathize with your feelings or act like they care that you are upset. (7497)20. is disrespectful and underestimates women (8090) 20. treat women like an object.(8804)

20. …focuses solely on physical intimacy and appearance, rather than regarding me for the whole person that I am and appreciating what else I have to offer. (8778) 20. is late and don't appear to respect my time 1524 20. Ignores and rejects me. (6955) 20. ... disregards the feelings and experiences of women. (0974) 20 Uses me for physical pleasures only and does not care about my feelings. 8870 20. It hurts me when males fail to understand how certain things they do or say can come off as insensitive and rude. (1481) 20. ... degrades women. Whether they are aware of it or not, it needs to stop. (8003) 20) harasses me when I don’t reciprocate their feelings towards me. (5945)

20. disrespects me (8635) 20. Puts me in a category as if because i am a woman i must be dumb or not as smart as them (3584).20. Cares so much about what a woman looks only on the outside. (4259) 20. disregards my feelings by putting their own well-being before mine. (5649)

#21. I feel best about the opposite sex when...

21. they appreciate and value me (0224) They are understanding,trustworthy, respectful, and are open to my opinions. (9745) 21. They are kind and respectful. (0496) 21. They make me feel safe and protected instead of intimidated 21. they are respectful and protective.(8804)

21. ... they see and value the positive qualities that I possess and we can mutually enjoy each othesr company (1569) 21. I am around my boyfriend. (7497) 21. …they understand me as a whole and appreciate my strengths and are not bothered by my weaknesses. (8778) 21. they're understanding towards my feelings and show empathy. 1524

21. They are giving me the attention I think I deserve. (6955)

#21. …I make real intellectual connections and feel as though their best interest with me lies with my best interest in them. (8701)

21. ... they take time to understand why equality is important and don't use it as an excuse to get attention. (0974)

21. is confident and nice to me.8870

21. I feel best about the opposite sex when they are being charismatic or humorous. (1481)

21. ... they listen and are considerate of others. (8003)

21) when I’m not around teenage boys. (5945)

21. i trust them (8635)

21. They are down to earth with a good sense of humor who understand that I am human and I mess up but they will still love me (3584)

21. They try to make you feel comfortable, try to understand you, and respect you. (4259)

21. When they are sensitive, respectful, romantic, protective, and vulnerable (8090)

21. I feel like I am being respected/listened to. (5649)




#1. Think about the previous interactions you have had with the opposite sex. Has a situation ever occurred with someone of opposite sex that you found deeply puzzling and/or incomprehensible? And which you also think is somehow a function of that person's gender (not just the specific individual involved)? If so, think about what happened, and the behaviors, cognitions, motivations, or emotions of the opposite sex that you found particularly puzzling

  1. Situations that I find interesting are when men have sex with women and do not become emotionally attached. Yes, there are women out there who say they can have sex without “catching feelings” but it usually ends up in some drama. Men’s sex life appears to not correlate with their emotional self. (4012)

1. I have found a consistency among men to avoid commitment of any kind after a sexual experience, or to somehow perpetuate his own fears of commitment onto me, as if I am pushing some type of expectation of commitment onto him. I find it very unattractive when a guy that I have had a sexual interaction with automatically assumes that I want more than a casual relationship with him or that I somehow expect a certain level of commitment from him thereafter. Guys do not always realize that girls can be just as unattached or have as little interest in dating as they do. Just because we hook up with you, we do not necessarily expect anything afterwards. There have been several instances where a guy will tell me he is not interested in a relationship or does not want me to get the wrong impression when it is not necessary for him to say so, and I end up feeling frustrated that my thoughts and feelings about the situation were inaccurately decided for me. I understand that guys can be scared of commitment and that this often influences how they act toward girls, but I wish they would understand that we are just as scared sometimes.(2955)

1. I have found that men have a far easier time leaving their wives and children. This can be in the form of a simple business trip or an overall desertion of their family. It puzzles me that men are able to do this with seemingly no regret. The motivation for these actions may be economical or personal as in the form of the infamous “midlife crisis.” I believe this is a kind of selfish emotion that propels the action. Men seem to do what is in their best interest, whereas women seem to do what is best for their family in general even if that comes as a sacrifice to the family finances or personal happiness. (6259)

1. One characteristic of guys that has always puzzled me is how quickly they can get over something that bothered them. For example, I have seen some of my guy friends get upset with each other over something. They will get mad but then they will move on and get over it. After they have moved on, it is like nothing ever happened and they can easily go back to being best friends. This is so different from fights that girls have because girls will often hold grudges for longer and cannot move on easily. Therefore, I believe that my guy friends' ability to get over an argument quickly and easily is a function of their gender, not just their individual characteristics. (2992)

  1. I had an argument with my boyfriend about young boys painting their nails. I did not really care either way but he insisted that it was absolutely not okay and that he would never let his (hypothetical) son do that for fear of the child being bullied. This is defiantly related to gender since girls are seen as painting their nails and boys are seen as not and to be seen as doing something girly is often times seen as weak to different people. My boyfriend’s reaction was irrational to me, and he was very angry and upset with the idea of his son doing something that could get him bullied. I found his logic, anger, and fear very confusing, and the link between nail polish and bullying even harder to understand. (5369)

  1. 1. I don’t recall a situation where the opposite sex found me deeply incomprehensible in understanding my messages for communication, however, there have been times where I’ve expressed a situation to someone of the opposite sex and it was not fully understood or able to be empathized. I strongly believe there was an emotional disconnect was due to the different experiences we’ve had being two different genders. (0531)

1. Men cheating and not feeling guilty after is a situation that I have encountered countless times. Many of my guy friends over the years have cheated on their loving girlfriends and not broken up with them. Some have only done so once, but many have maintained consistent sexual relationships with other girls while "seriously" dating someone. They treat their girls as potential wives, meet their parents, etc. in front of the world and yet are secretly violating their utmost trust. I don't understand how men can go to bed comfortably knowing they are actively and voluntarily deceiving someone who prioritizes them and is considering their relationship as marriage potential.

I understand the sexual motivation that drives men to do so. I do not, however, understand how the internal evaluation of their behavior eventually does not eventually cause them enough discomfort to either end the relationship or stop having sex with other people. The obvious sentimental difference between men and women aside, I feel as though guilt is a non-sexually dispersed emotion. If a man or woman robs a store, they should feel equally guilty. If a man or woman is not being honest, shouldn't they feel equally guilty? (8638)

1. A situation a few months ago that I had with my boyfriend made me think of the question of whether something the opposite sex had done that seemed incomprehensible. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years, we very rarely ever fight, yet this moment was probably the biggest fight we have ever had. When my parents were visiting a couple months ago we had a plan that I would pick him up around 3, go pick up my parents from the airport and take them around L.A. Just before 3 I called my boyfriend probably around 15 times with no answer so I angrily left without him. He called an hour later and said he just woke up… at 4:00pm… so my parents thought it was no big deal, he met us for dinner, but I was pretty livid. On our way home from dinner we dropped my parents off and I told him I was really sad and needed him to come over and talk and he asked me to drop him off at his place instead. I was calm, I was furious, and I told him if he left right then I would be really really angry. He left anyways and I later found out that he was playing video games with friends. I actually felt my heart break when he told me that and I called him saying if I wasn’t as important as video games than he really needs to evaluate his priorities. He ran over and apologized and even though I had told him flat out why I was mad, how he could make it better, and what to do he still decided that video games were more important in that moment. He has since made up for it with flowers and plenty of attention but I really did not understand how he could be so dumb. I think that this behavior was completely due to his male gender. Even when I spelled everything out for him he was more interested in getting back to his video games than paying attention to my needs. (8237)

1. I feel like the majority of men are driven by sex. It’s almost puzzling to me how much men crave it. I find it interesting, but also frustrating at times, that a man’s mood can change just based on the amount of sex they have. For example, if a man isn’t having sex often, I often feel like they are significantly more irritable and easily angered than a man who has sex often. I’ve found that women can go for longer periods of time abstaining from sex without it affecting their mood. I know that men have testosterone running rampant through their bodies, and science can prove that that causes them to be more sexually driven; the part that puzzles me is the extent to which most men are sexually driven. (2307)

1. An instance from the past that I found to be particularly puzzling about the opposite sex is based on a male friend of mine who likes to pick fights when he is under the influence of alcohol. I have witnessed this happen with only men multiple times when alcohol was involved. I’m wondering if it is testosterone induced because as a woman, I don’t quite have any desire to physically attack another for no reason. This can also happen when not alcohol, but jealousy is involved. A physical competition seems to be the go-to for men when trying to settle an issue whereas women, I feel, tend toward more sneaky revenge strategies. (0572)

1. One thing I find being deeply puzzling and incomprehensible about the opposite sex is their ability to move from one emotion to the next so fast. For example, when two men fight with each other over a serious topic they are somehow able to get over it and be friends with that person a short amount of time later. Although that does seem productive, I always wonder if that is just men not taking the time to think about and truly recognize their emotions about a certain issue. It does not seem possible to me for a serious issue to be resolved in that short amount of time. With that, I find it odd that women are negatively deemed as too emotional, but the same can be said of men in that they are not emotional enough in certain circumstances. (8417)

1) I never understood why men never want to ask for help thinking that they can always solve any problem on their own. An example is asking for driving directions. While a woman would have no problem in asking other people to help her find a place, a men would stubbornly insist to try to find the way on his own, as if to show he is cable to solve the problem without anyone’s help. However, this is such a waste of time! It seems to me that men behave in this way to show that, as men, they are in control of the situation and can accomplish any task independently. They also seem to believe that asking for help could diminish their masculinity. In reality, it could only save them a lot of time! (7500)

  1. Recently I had a situation happen with the opposite gender where I meet a new mutual friend. We absolutely hit it off, had common interests, and in general vibed together very well. But I had no sexual feelings towards this new friend and saw him as just a friend. I reference several times in our interaction what a good friend he was trying to emphasize the fact that I was only interested in friendship. I thought I made myself incredibly clear until het started to hit on me a few days later and ask me on a date. I reminded him that I just wanted to be friends and he was incredibly upset saying that from his perspective I was flirting with him and insinuating that I liked him. I was just being nice to this guy and told him multiple times that I had a boyfriend and just wanted to be friends. I am not sure how my message could have been any clearer? He took my niceness for flirtation and that I was physically attracted to him. To him I believe that he thought this girl is being nice to me she must want to have sex with me. It really frustrates me that it seems impossible to have true guy friends. (0423)

1.) One instance with the opposite sex that I found puzzling involved the male tendency to keep their emotions completely to themselves. A boyfriend and I had recently broken up, and I asked his best friend how he was handling it. His friend told me that he seemed okay but they hadn’t talked about much in detail. I was very confused as to why he seemed to have such little information and realized it was because men do not seem to confide in their closest friends the same way that women do. Women often lean on each other for social and emotional support, but male friendships seem to have very different dynamics that I don’t completely understand (2387) 1. 1) Something deeply puzzling/incomprehensible I found with the opposite sex, is the fact that they do not like to apologize. While both sexes do this, I feel that it is more of a common trait with men. I think they feel that it is a threat to their ego, and by apologizing, they are showing weakness and vulnerability a trait that is not considered socially acceptable, more specifically socially acceptable for men. This often happens to me with my father, who rather than admit he is wrong, he will try to buy me something to make up for it. This is his way of apologizing. This also happens in relationships, rather than say sorry, I also had an experience where a guy, bought me something instead to make up for it. 6947

1. I often find it puzzling than many men do not pick up on subtleties in social situations and in interpersonal interactions. I have noticed that sometimes when I have dropped hints to men to indicate that I am not interested they simply don’t pick up on the hints (or maybe don’t care) and continue to be persistent in pursuing me. Sometimes it also seems that some men don’t pick up on emotional subtleties (body language, tons, voice inflections, etc.) whereas many of my females friends do and will automatically ask about the emotion they see I am experiencing. I think this may be a result of men not being encouraged to be in touch with emotions and consequently not being very quick to pick up on others’ emotions or subtleties. Also men tend to be more straightforward and emit less emotional subtleties themselves so it is possible that they do not expect these subtleties from others.(1252)

1. Something puzzling about the opposite sex is how most guys get incredibly uncomfortable when you ask them for their opinion on the attractiveness of another guy. Being a girl, I know all too well how easy it is for a girl to recognize when another one of us has put in effort in her appearance, or is pretty/beautiful/hot. However, a lot of the times when you ask a male about the physical appearance of another male they get defensive and say “I don’t know I don’t look at guys like that”. It puzzles me because they automatically think we are calling them homosexual or implying that they may be into males, when it’s just that we as females are used to complimenting other women’s appearances and don’t feel attacked when asked if we find another female attractive. (8993)

#1) When I first started college, I had my first romantic relationship with a guy who was four years older. There were a couple of times, where the differences in gender got in the way of our relationship. One of the things that affected our relationship and what I find an issue with the male gender is that they come across as insensitive and unable to pick up emotions. I just don’t understand why guys have to act very rational and not be able pick up subtle cues that you are not looking for someone who can act very rational. (5702)

1. I have found that men often assume that girls want a serious commitment. I had an experience where I hooked up with a friend of a close friend on a vacation. It happened a couple nights in a row and then he randomly ignored me the last night. My close friend told me that the guy was worried if he hooked up with me every night that I would assume we were dating or “talking” when we weren’t on vacation anymore. This ended up straining our friendship and I was annoyed he would assume that. I wasn’t romantically interested in this guy at all and certainly didn’t act “coupley” on vacation with him so I couldn’t understand why he would think I wanted anything more just because I’m a girl. This is something I have heard from many of my friends who are simply having fun with a guy, and I’ve never heard it the other way around. (7663)

  1. 1.) A puzzling situation that has occurred repeatedly in my romantic relationships with Men is the issue of porn. No matter how many times I have tried, I can’t wrap my head around why Men watch porn that are in committed relationships. It doesn’t make sense to me. I don’t know any females that go home to jack off to a naked guy after they just had a date with their boyfriend. It’s gross! In some ways I almost feel as if it is a form of infidelity. I can’t comprehend WHY anyone would feel the need to watch trashy women doing fornicating with another man whose penis is probably way larger then the person that is watching it. I would feel bad about myself if I was watching a specimen built much better than I, getting pleasure from a woman that I would never realistically have a chance with. Perhaps this is a puzzle I will never solve.(1324)

I saw two guys get into a huge fight. For girls it would mean the end of a friendship, but these guys just punched it out and were back to being friends the very next day. I see this behavior a lot with men and, although I do admire it, I do not understand it at all. (9031) I once had a boyfriend who smoked a lot of cigarettes. Although smoking is not a gender specific habit, chewing tobacco does tend to aim in a direction more relevant to men than women. My ex always talked about how he needed to stop smoking, however he never seemed to follow through with his plan, so I took it into my own hands to attempt to help in. I would think that someone would want the help of someone who cares about them, at least most women tend to think that way mostly out of a nurturing instinct. I think that guys generally tend to be much more independent and stubborn than women, so when I tried to help, he took it as an attack and acted unfavorably. The response of my ex was to yell at me, telling me to never take his things again, and that it was none of my business. I found this puzzling because I didn’t really care one way or another what he wanted to do with his lungs, I was just trying to help and his stubborn motives fogged his sight of that. (5857)

1. An instance I found particularly puzzling about the opposite sex did not have to do with me, but rather my friend and her boyfriend. He constantly was putting her down and said that he was worried about cheating on her soon. If that is the case, then why wouldn't he just end the relationship? it seems dumb to be a part of something you are not committed to or happy with. Why can't he just call it quits and get away before they finish college. Maybe he is scared of being alone. (2662)

I know someone who is unhappy with his girlfriend, even cheats on her, and yet won’t break up with her. I find this tremendously puzzling, because if you are no longer interested in someone, you should end the relationship instead of dragging it out. I don’t understand why he would stay with her. I think the motivation behind this, however, is the reaction. One, I think that men might be more inclined (than women) to stay with someone they no longer like because it is easier than dealing with the complicated emotions of a girl they are breaking up with. I think men might find it hard to break up with women because of the reaction they more than likely receive.

I live with my boyfriend and when we first moved in together I realized how messy he was. When I asked him about it he said it just didn’t bother him and that he will clean up eventually he just doesn’t feel the need to do it right away. This was really puzzling to me because I just can’t live in a mess, I have to clean up after myself and live in a clean and neat environment. I think this is a function of his gender and not just his own characteristic because I have noticed that all the guys houses I’ve been in are dirtier in general than houses that girls live in. I think that “clean” means different things for girls and guys. (9232)

  1. When men utterly refuse to ask for directions or use a GPS. I’ve had the same puzzling experience with a number of different men in which I continue to be baffled by. In one particular occasion, my boyfriend and I were lost in a city where I didn’t have any familiarity. My boyfriend had been to the destination before and therefore believed there was no need for a GPS and he would be able to find it with ease. After quite a bit of time had pasted I began to suggest that we input the address into my cellular GPS in order to get directions, yet he was determined to figure out how to get there without help. I’m not sure if his refusal had to do with control or somehow proving himself, either way it took us twice as long to reach the final destination. (4610)

'1. 'What I found puzzling was that he got to know me and liked me but he didn’t or couldn’t connect with me on an emotional level

I spent a lot of time with this one guy in particular. We were friends, made each other laugh, spent time together, liked each other’s company, and were having sex. But he was unable to treat me with the loyalty and the respect in which he treated his guy friends with. No matter how much fun we had together, he remained a player. He wasn’t there emotionally and it never got to the emotional level between us. Well, for him. He said he wouldn’t make a good boyfriend because he wasn’t good at being faithful. I told him I didn’t want a boyfriend. But even as a friend to me, despite the semi-deep conversations we had, he was never able to treat me like one of his “boys”, even though I acted like one. Was he conditioned to be like this? Was it because he used to be in a gang? Was it because I am a girl? Was it because we were having sex? Or was it just him? (1109)

  1. 1. One situation that I have found deeply puzzling is why think that everyone woman wants to sleep with him and why they are so sexually driven. Just because a woman agrees to go over to watch a movie does not automatically mean that she wants to sleep with him. Maybe she genuinely just wants to watch a movie and get to know about your personality, not your body! It just amazes me how sometimes that is all that men think about and all that they want from women. Maybe this is due to the different hormones that men and women have or the different motivations that men have. Men need to realize that women are more than just sexual objects and that we are human beings with a ton of emotions and treating us in a terrible way will only result in us bringing them all the unwanted emotions. 9295

My boyfriend at the time and I were living in New York City and decided to take a day trip to Coney Island. Even from where we lived in the city the trek out to Coney Island was still a long one and it took nearly an hour and a half on the train due to the frequent stops to pick up more beach hungry travelers. I happened to get sun screen in my eyes while on the train and couldn’t do anything to get it out. I tried to keep my cool and just ignore the fact that I could hardly even keep my eyes open but I was honestly in a lot of pain. My boyfriend got so upset with me. He was clearly annoyed and frustrated that I couldn’t simply suck it up and we had to leave after only 45 minutes at the beach. I was baffled. I couldn’t believe that he didn’t care that my eyes stung so bad. I think that since he couldn’t understand how bad my eyes were hurting that he couldn’t understand why it was something that was unbearable. I can understand his frustration with the waste of a day but I couldn’t understand why he was so mad at me out of nowhere. I think this is semi-typical of the amount of aggression that men generally have. (1160)

1. One thing that I’ve found to be extremely puzzling of the opposite sex is that they are never willing to admit when they are wrong or need help. The classic example of this is that men, are never willing to ask for directions. I’ve always wondered why men can’t ask for direction or assistance with anything, and I would assume that it would be embarrassing for them to ask because it is a sign of weakness. What makes this characteristic puzzling to me is that if I put myself in the shoes of a man, I would find it much more embarrassing to go through the motions of not asking for directions (getting lost, being late because you’re lost, trying to figure out how to get there without the directions and just getting even more lost) than just asking directions in the first place. (8077)

1. Just their lack of common sense, or what I think would be common sense. Two examples are their lack of ability to notice or pick up on girls hints or cues when it comes to emotions AND how majority of drunk males think they can get with any girl just because she’s hot or dressed a certain way. I’m just confused on how they lack that common sense to notice or take those social cues. Maybe it is a biological thing, but I just can’t understand how most males just don’t pick up on the hints, just for anything (saying no or yes to sex, when we’re sad they don’t notice, etc.) (6858)

1. I was friends with this guy for a good amount of time. I respected him as a person and enjoyed his company. We stayed at a friendship level for a while. One day I started seeing him as something more than just a friend. We went to a party and ended up hooking up. We hooked up two more times after that and never went passed kissing. The nights we were together, we ended up talking and hanging out for hours. I felt myself liking him more but I realized that every time we were together, he tried to go even further with me (physically, that is). The next morning, I get a text saying that we shouldn’t see each other anymore, at least in that way. There were a lot of different factors to it that made it complicated, but I still took it hard. I decided, though, that I was going to make an effort to get our friendship back. Yet, whenever I talked to him, he mistook it as me being “clingy” and “desperate”. It almost seemed like when he saw that I would not go further with him physically, he was no longer interested in talking to me even as a friend. I’ve always heard the phrase, “guys only want one thing”, however this was the first time I experienced it first hand. Girls are always told that guys are only after sex, yet we find ourselves having this underlying hope that we will find a guy that is the exception. Why are guys like this? Obviously he liked me as a person because we were friends before anything happened, so why was it so easy for him to dismiss me even as a friend? He never thought I was clingy or desperate when we were friends, so why now? Was it always just about the sex? Why is the physical aspect of relationships so important to them? (3651)

1. One thing I find immensely confusing about the opposite sex is their ability to blow up in anger about a particular situation and then act as if it was not that big of an issue. I have experienced several instances where I have seen men yell and become incredibly irate over a particular topic and then within an hour or so, they seem to forget it ever happened. Women do not recover from instances of anger that quickly, rather we tend to dwell on the things that upset us. Women tend to complain about an issue to anyone who is willing to lend an ear and it seems that men are more about a spontaneous eruption of anger and then a fairly quick recovery from it. (0946)

1. Men tend to choose their friends over a girlfriend but this seems to only apply to other male friends. If the girlfriend has a problem with the boyfriend having female friends the male is usually willing to cut ties with the female friends in order to maintain the relationship. (7437)

1) The most clear-cut example I have in response to this question is in relation to football, basketball, or any other sports season in my household. My father is a huge fan of sports, just like many other men, and whenever he gets excited over a play in the game, he usually expresses extreme emotions. For example my dad and many other men will literally yell what is going on in the play from top to bottom, as if he were announcing it on a radio broadcast. Furthermore, he will sometimes physically arise from his seat, throwing his arms into the air when something goes wrong. I notice when he watches sports with any other males, their reactions are vastly similar. The reason I find these actions puzzling is because I cannot imagine feeling such a high affinity for something that one has no authentic personal ties to. In a sense, I don’t understand why males act so emotionally, many times asserting aggression, to a sport that they are not even participating in. The outburst of emotion amongst men when watching sports boggles my mind. (3886)

1. Every Sunday I play football with my boyfriend and his four roommates and our other friends. There is usually one girl on each team to make the teams fair. Whenever there are girls involved, we usually view the football game as a time for exercise and a fun and playful time with our group of friends. However, the boys participating in the game view is completely differently. What may be a friendly flag football game to the girls is a complete different game to the guys. All of the guys become very competitive and aggressive in order to win. They get so into the game and get very upset when they lose. The girls on the other hand have no opinion on the outcome of the game, for they don’t view it in a competitive manner. For instance, after a game that the team my boyfriend and I were on lost, he was upset the rest of the day and I got over the fact pretty much immediately. I think that this is definitely a function of an individual’s behavior. My boyfriend becomes so competitive and aggressive along with the other boys during flag football and the girls are more relaxed and in it for the fun of it. I find it so puzzling that these guys get so competitive with each other and often get into arguments over a simple football game.

1. A situation has occurred with someone of opposite sex that I found puzzling. I was involved in an on/off again relationship with someone for four and a half years who was cheating on me constantly, yet would not let me end the relationship. I found it totally bizarre that someone who was clearly interested in other people, would be so insistent on staying in a relationship and I do find that to be partially due to gender.(8531)

One characteristic that I have found the most puzzling or incomprehensible in men is that they aren’t able to understand or fully empathize with a woman’s emotions. I have found from my experiences that when I woman is feeling poorly about something or insecure, guys look for a quick fix rather than talking to the girl about it and making her feel better. If I went to my guy friends saying I feel fat, they would tell me to go to the gym. If I went to my girl friends, they would sympathize with me and convince me that I wasn’t fat. I just don’t understand, because I’m sure they have insecurities or emotions too but never seek comfort in the same way we do. (2431)

  1. When my dad tells me that I look like need to rest or clean up or go to the gym. I don’t think men have the same body image concerns as girls and so doesn’t realize that it is hurtful when he says things like that. (4669)

1. Although I don't think all men have this, I find their need for competition extremely puzzling. I dated a guy who was really nice and sweet most of the time, but whenever there was a situation that involved competition, he would get aggressive and throw a fit if he lost. Whether it was a sport, a videogame, a conversation, or a word search, he could not stand to lose if it became a competition with someone else. While I don't think all guys are this intense, I do think they seem to have higher drives for competition in general. (8359)


A situation that has occurred with someone of the opposite sex that was baffling to me, happened at a bar. My boyfriend at the time and I went outside to get some fresh air and I had taken my drink with me. When we decided to go back inside the club, as soon as I walked in, a guy clinked his glass with mine and said "Bottoms up". At that moment I was frozen because my boyfriend at the time was insanely jealous, so I tried to walk away but it was too late as my boyfriend had seen the guy. He in return said "Bottoms up" to the guy and clinked his glass so hard that he broke it. This created a big commotion, and theguy had not even noticed that I had walked in with someone else. He did not do it intentionally. My ex-boyfriend got really upset at me for not telling him what happened (in the brief three seconds that I had to react) and he went outside to talk to the guy. There was no big argument, just talked, but it humiliated me to no end. Needless to say, it was one of the catalysts for the end of our relationship a few months after. I think guys in general tend to get very territorial and feel extremely threatened if another guy was to talk to their girlfriend even if it is harmless causing trust issues in the relationship. (8436)

1. I don’t think that I have found any interaction with the opposite sex completely incomprehensible because when they have been, I have just attributed it solely to them being boys, difficult to understand and with their own feelings and emotions different from my own. I think it’s best sometimes to put things into this perspective instead of over-analyzing why I don’t understand. (6536)

049 1. One thing that has always confused me about men is there absolute obsession with video games. Yes some are fun, but I’ve been in a room and the guys literally cannot take their eyes off the screen for hours. It seems like nothing in the world could get them off that couch. Then when they play them, they get really mad and aggressive. Many video games have such inappropriate subjects and actions in them it is extremely offensive. Ive seen some where the guy gets extra points for raping women or shooting people. I’ve seen people throw controllers and loudly yell at the computer. I don’t understand why these games are taken so seriously and get mad when girls have absolutely no interest in playing them. I think this could tie back to men releasing built up tension through playing the video games. It is almost like they live vicariously through the video game. They can use the advantage of having a better understanding of spatial events to feel strong in areas of the video games that they can’t do in reality. (2321)

1. I had an on and off relationship with a guy who would consistently make plans with me and then flake without ever saying one word. He would either just not call me or stop mid text message and I would not hear from him again until the next day or two. He would call me again a few days later and not say anything about flakin and would act confused in I tried to bring it up. I think as a gender, males sometimes ted to not think about how their actions will hurt someone else. Especially at this age range, I think many will get as much as they can with putting the least amount of effort forth. (6991)

  1. 1 I have three older brothers, all of whom have had serious girlfriends over the past few years. Every one of them has been so infatuated by their significant other that they do pretty much anything their girlfriends ask of them. I’ve never been that into a guy, and when I see my brothers answer to their every beck and call it seriously confuses me because I can’t see myself ever being so controlled by anyone. I’m not sure if it’s a guy thing or a relationship thing, though. It does seem like people generally seem to say, particularly in marriage, husbands typically just do whatever their wife tells them. I find it so confusing because when I think about what I’m attracted to, the last thing that comes to mind is a pushover. Nothing turns me off more than someone who lets people walk all over them. (0497)
1. What I find to be a problem in my past relationships is the fact that males have a constant need to wear the “pants” in the relationship. I believe that when one enters a relationship, they are committing to an equal partnership. Evidently, this was not the case in my past relationship. One day, my ex boyfriend and I went out to dinner and once we parked, I walked out of the car, walked into the restaurant before him and told the maitre’d that we needed a table for two. When we sat at our booth, I could tell by the strenuous look on his face that he was not pleased with me. A couple minutes later, after discussing what we wanted to order, the waiter came and I ordered. This caused such a problem! He felt as if I belittled him, took away from his manhood and disrespected him because as a “man” he was supposed to open the door for me, be the one to talk, be the one to order the food etc...Why would he ruin his mood, then move on to ruining my mood just because he did not like the fact that I ordered or spoke up. It was mind-boggling. We were in a relationship, he has no superiority over me just because he is male. The fact that he believed he did frustrated me even more, because when I asked why he was acting like that, he answered “I’m a guy, let me act like a guy. You are a girl, stop acting like a man.” (0613)

1. I have experienced several men not giving women the time of day until he figures out that she is “cool” by his friend's standards. In other words, he waits for his friends validation before he can even talk to a girl. In my experience, a guy will not show interest in a girl until one of his more confident friends accepts her. I notice this a lot among the fraternities at LMU. It puzzles me that they need another’s approval before making the decision for themselves. (7100)

  1. 1. There have been times when I have found the opposite puzzling and I think a lot of what I don’t understand stems from how men do not seem to need as much emotional support as women. A particular case is when men have a problem they seem to a) ignore it or b) complain about it but not take any advice. This is from personal experience when I have tried to give advice but they do not seem to want to take it. It is a very frustrating when you become emotionally invested in someone’s problem, to have them not even take the advice and somehow you become “overbearing”. (9164)
  1. Last week, I was out with my girl and guy friends. We were all having a good time and then as the night went on, my guy friends’ testosterone increasingly came out to the point where my friend punched his fraternity brother in the face. The reason was because “he was being fucking annoying” that night, but why was there a need to punch someone for annoyance? This is a function of being a male, in my opinion, because guys like to show their alpha side with other males, and sometimes this comes out with physical violence (2501).
  1. I find it puzzling when men seem to not care about things that happen in their life as much as women tend to. For example, men tend to go with the flow rather than plan like women do. On top of that, men do not analyze situations like women do. Men could care less sometimes about what is going on around them because they feel like they are not being affected directly. I do not think that this is something that is gender specific but most males do act in this way. I believe that men act in this way because being emotional and dramatic is considered a feminine trait and men try to act as masculine as possible. (5659)
  2. Something I find puzzling is the culture and negativity that a majority of men have towards being or acting “like women”. A lot of the puzzling things I’ve seen and heard with men are the sensitive aspects of emotions. Men don’t like to be considered sensitive or compared to women. A lot of times, there are negative connotations with doing something “like a girl” and telling men to “man-up.” All of this is funny and interesting because human nature involved emotions. It’s human nature to cry when you’re hurt or sad. Why are these emotional aspects of life considered only for women and looked down upon when a man does them? 3066

1. One situation I find confusing and puzzling is when guys physically fight with each other when they have a problem. I’ve watched my guy friends who are mad at each other get into a fight and punch each other in the face, and afterwards they hugged and the fight was over. I think this is specific to men because girls find it harder to let go of problems they may have with their friends. Girls talk about their problems over and over again and we have a hard time forgiving each other unless we verbally express our feelings versus guys who can just fight each other to solve a problem and then they’re automatically over it. (7008)

1. I have always found it rather puzzling that several men that I have met have a very difficult time displaying emotion openly. I know that there is a societal stigma against men showing emotion, but also just in general, I feel that men sometimes do not even understand why it is important to show emotion. For example, if I’m ever upset my father will often be unable to comprehend why I need to cry and he says “just stop feeling that way”, when to me I feel it is more healthy to show your true emotions and not keep all your strong emotions locked away inside of you. (6617)

1. One thing I find so puzzling about the opposite sex is how they think passing gas is so funny. This is a very minimal thing but most, if not all males I’ve been close to have found it hilarious when it comes to passing gas. I myself find it disgusting to do in the presence of others and very rude. I was in the military so a majority of the people I have been surrounded by are males, I don’t get offended easily but passing gas is just something that should be done in private. Most guys I encounter say, “They can’t help it!” I think that’s a lie, I think they just don’t want to help it. I know everybody does it but if I’m able to hold it I’m sure they can. (7302)

I was really interested in a guy in my class during my sophomore year of college. Upon meeting him, he became extremely friendly, warm, and receptive. We exchanged information and began speaking very frequently. He quickly became the one person that would go everywhere with me. We often times spent every waking moment together. He was with me from the early morning until the evening. And he was very clear about his intentions. Eventually, he sat me down and stated that he was beginning to have very strong feelings for me and was hoping that I felt the same way. But shortly after we had this discussion and we began to develop a deep emotional connection, he shut me out and became emotionally unavailable. I find that often times, once men start to feel vulnerable and may potentially start showing emotions that do not match up with society's expectations for their gender, they shut down and refuse to go against society's expectations for fear of being judged. (3231)

One thing I find particularly puzzling about the opposite sex is their unwillingness to admit that they need help or that they are wrong. For example, my father thinks he can fix anything when in reality, he can’t. Instead of calling a specialist to fix our plumbing, he tried to do it himself until he made the situation so bad that he had no choice but to call an actual plumber. My family has enough money to hire a plumber, so this was not a matter of finances. He even got mad when my mom and I told tell him just to call someone so he wouldn’t have to do it himself. Even after he broke our piping, my father still wouldn’t admit that he should have just left our plumbing alone in the first place. 4531

1- Situations that confound me deeply with the opposite sex is every time that I need to prevent, presence or deal with the consequences of boys/men getting into fights. I have always found it absolutely bewildering how easily men become aggressive and get into fights. What I found particularly puzzling was their (and I speak in plural terms as this has happened multiple times) inability to think clearly and separate themselves from the situation. They act as if it were their duty to participate in fights if the situation calls/or doesn't call for it. (9140)

1. Speaking non-romantically and romantically, I have had many of instances when I was deeply perplexed about the other sex. I have many guy friends where I have deep conversations with them and it would be great. It’s all open, nothing held back, just raw information. It is refreshing when speaking with them because they will tell you exactly how it is without beating around the bush, about anything. When speaking romantically, I feel like it is completely the opposite. I don’t get direct answers and they tend to hold things back when talking. They’re all boys, but their behaviors change depending on the relationship status. I don’t think it is a function a guy’s gender, but maybe just varies on person to person. (0018)

I find it incredibly puzzling when a guy that should know me very well considering how long we have been dating still fails to pick up on the cues that tell him something is bothering me. Me having to tell him what is wrong just angers me even further because by now he should know me front and back and know what pushes my buttons and what makes me happy. Failing to recognize patterns in my emotions and his behavior is incredibly puzzling for me because as a girl I pick up on the smallest details and fluctuations in a guy’s demeanor, tone, etc…yet the fact that a guy I’ve been dating for for months is so oblivious is incredibly puzzling. It makes me question if he purposefully tries to dodge the situation and look oblivious to avoid confrontation and a fight, or if whenever similar arguments occur—the things I say go in one ear and out the other and he doesn’t actually take into consideration what I’m saying and change his behavior for the future.

#2. In general, what do you like about the opposite sex? What do you dislike? Again, think of the opposite sex in general, as they actually are, not how you might like them to be different

2. What I like about men is that they are usually drama free. They may indirectly cause drama, but for the most part the relationships they keep with people are honest. Another aspect I like about men is how they look physically, mainly the torso and facial features. No matter their build, there is a universal similarity all men have. Additionally, guys have a protective nature which I admire and drawn too. That being said, being over protective and trying to be a hero is something I dislike. This may be just from a personal experience, but I want to feel protected not become a damsel in distress. Another aspect of men that I dislike is their lack of communicating. Sometimes it feels as though he is holding something back.( 4012)

  1. 1. I really like that men (in general) have a tendency to be much more laid back, and easy going that women. It makes them comfortable and easy to be around. I also really like that men allow themselves to be much more goofy and lighthearted (or society allows them) compared to women. It is often more fun to be around men because they are more in-tune with their goofy side.

> I dislike that men criticize women for having qualities that are heavily expected of us societally. For example they will have a tendency to make fun of us for trying to eat healthy but don’t understand that we are under such a heavy pressure to look a certain way. (1569)

  1. I mostly like that men are protectors and also their spontaneity is something I can be envious of. I dislike their lack of cleanliness and hygiene, and the fact that they can be stubborn and insensitive at times. (7407)

2. Something I definitely like about guys is that they tend to be down to earth and carefree, maybe even genuine, compared to girls. Sometimes girls worry too much about how they act and what they say or feel like they need to constantly keep up with each other. I think guys tend to just be themselves more often and are less concerned with what other people think about them and how much they are liked. Another thing I like is the confidence that guys put off, even if it is somewhat artificial. Guys tend to be relatively outgoing and willing to put themselves out there in terms of approaching a girl they want to talk to or speaking in class. On the other hand, over-confidence or overcompensation for a lack of confidence can make guys act arrogant, which is a distasteful attribute among their gender. Another characteristic I dislike of males is their lack of emotion or care in certain circumstances, especially in relationships and when a girl wants to talk about her feelings and feel the guy is genuinely considering them. (2955)

2. In general, I like that men are physically strong, strong willed, and loyal. I have 4 older brothers and it is interesting to see how different we all are, but at the same the differences between our sexes have made my experience growing up very different than theirs. I like that men have a desire to succeed and a willingness to step up in any situation. I dislike that men are extremely blunt and aggressive. Truthfulness is good but many times men are truthful in a hurtful way. Men also take much longer to mature than women, and often, when they have matured, they resort back to their immaturity. (8237)

2. I like that the opposite sex is attractive. They need little maintenance to attain this attractiveness unlike women. They are able to roll out of bed and still look at their best while this takes minutes or hours for a woman to accomplish. I also like that men are less complicated. Their emotions do not dictate their every decision and they do not feel the need to vocalize their emotions like women do. I find that there is a general easygoing attitude that comes with being a man in terms of both appearance and emotion. I don’t like the way men come to a decision so quickly with so little thought behind their actions. I find that men are more impulsive and once they make an impulsive decision their stubbornness takes over to make them stay with the impulsive decision even if they know they were wrong. (6259)

2. What I like about the opposite sex is the fact they are protective, physically attractive, strong, I like when they act manly (when they are able to “man up”), their sense of humor, they’re ambitious, when they are self confident, they are simple, minimalistic, and just their overall ability to just be chill and casual. It could be a good balance for those moments, for me personally, when I’m just all over the place. What I dislike is their lack to notice or take hints, their ego, when they are too sex driven, they can be lazy, and non-committal. (6858)

  1. 2. I generally like how the opposite sex tends to keep a relaxed disposition and tend to not involve themselves with a lot of drama. I also generally like their protectiveness because in certain situations and contexts, it makes me feel safe and not so anxious. To a certain extent I do like the stereotypical competitiveness because I am very competitive with a lot of things. To go alongside with the competitiveness, I also enjoy their activeness—involvement in contact sports, endurance sports, and strength sports—because I too love to participate in games and challenges to compete in.

I dislike how shallow they can be in social settings, for example, if they don’t find someone attractive, they tend to be very short, dismissive, and overtly show some kind of negligence to a person. I also don’t like their attraction towards aggression whether it be by watching, actively participating, or verbally using aggression and violence. I don’t like how they can stereotypically be indifferent or even apathetic towards others around them; they are generally egotistical and that will always be a very unattractive aspect to any person. (0531)

2. What I like about males is their ambition, physical attractiveness, simple-mindedness, having respect, a great imagination, and bravery/courage. What I don’t like about males is laziness, cockiness, jealousy, lack of trust, and lack of goals (2501)

2. I like how protective gusy are over girls. I like that generally they tend to be more low maintenance and more decisive in decision making. I dislike how defensive many guys can get even in simple situations. I dislike that they are generally less emotionaly available or can sometimes even be emotionally cold especially when faced with conflict. (6991)

2. I like that men are more protective, straight-forward, and typically calm. I find that they are generally more accepting than women are and less judgmental. I dislike that they can be extremely egotistical, aggressive, hold back their emotions, and be non-communicative (2662)

2. Some characteristics of the male sex that I like include how they can be protective and make me feel safe, their physical strength, and attractiveness. I also like how they are direct/to the point with their words and what they are thinking, their laid back attitude, and how they are much less dramatic than women. Some characteristics of the male sex that I dislike include their aggressive behavior that occurs at time, and how they are sex-driven and have a one track mind. I also dislike how they are less perceptive and less detailed oriented than women which can lead to them acting insensitive. (2992)

2. I generally like a man’s masculinity, calmness in a crisis, directness, and protectiveness. I do not like their lack of cleanliness, over competitiveness, tendency towards selective memory, and over sensitivity to certain things particularly their egos. (5369) 2. I like that by nature men are protective. Going along those same lines, I like that men are more athletic as well. When I think of men, two of the most masculine things to me are the protective nature of men and their natural athleticism and larger build. I would also say that I like that men do not over analyze situations as much as women do. I dislike that men tend to be terrible listeners. Sometimes when I talk to my boyfriend, I feel that what I say goes in one ear and out the other. I also dislike how hotheaded men can be. Men tend to get really angry immediately during an argument, but also tend to forgive and move on faster than women, but in my opinion, if men could stay more levelheaded and less quick to anger, arguments wouldn’t escalate to the extent that they do. (2307)

2.I really like how men are more simple human beings. I feel that when I have had a stressful day—I prefer to be around them rather than a flock of females. When it comes to a romantic partner, I like to feel protected and safe when I am with them. I find it very attractive when a man is driven and knows what he wants. If they can make me laugh—they’re golden. What I dislike is their resistance to showing certain emotions. When us women are so open and we’re getting nothing back—it makes us feel that perhaps you’re not into it or listening at all. (0572)

2) I like that men have the ability to live a simpler life with less drama and complications than women. It seems like they are able to find quicker and more efficient ways to deal with painful situations or to not be touched as much as women by uncomfortable social situations. What I dislike about men is their inability to understand how much sometimes they hurt us, and their decision of not doing anything about it. Most men seem unable to deal with our suffering and for this reason they just decide to ignore us, which is the worst decision they could ever make. (7500)

2. I like that males tend to be more laidback about things, they do not overanalyze or get worried about things as much. They also are much less concerned about how they appear to others, or what others think of them. I also like that they do not tend to talk about other people as much. Also, males are completely fine with hanging out with their friends and not talking. They can watch a game without making conversation and it is not considered "awkward." I dislike, how men sometimes have a sense of entitlement. They expect things to just fall on their lap. Like they expect to just have things cleaned, or washed, or to have a woman take care of them when they need it. This also has to do with moving. It is more acceptable for a woman to leave her current job/school/whatever for a man, than for a man to move for a woman. 6947

2.) I appreciate several characteristics that men generally tend to have. First, I like that guys are usually more laid-back and relaxed then girls. They don’t overanalyze situations and have a more straightforward, decisive outlook on life. I also like that men seem a lot less judgmental than women. Women seem to constantly size each other up, especially regarding appearances, and men tend not to gossip about those types of things as much as women do. One thing that I dislike about men in general, is their competitive nature. I have seen guys become extremely competitive even when playing board games that are meant to be light-hearted and funny. Sometimes men seem to let their competitiveness overtake their ability to have fun and just enjoy themselves (2387)

2. I like that men seem to take life less seriously than women do. They are straightforward in their problem solving and after a disagreement is solved they are instantly ready to go back to happier times. Men also generally mean what they say. If a man texted “I’m fine.” then he probably really is. However, if a girl said the same thing it would mean she is definitely not fine. However, sometimes I also don’t like that men don’t overthink things. Often men don’t consider how a woman will understand something. A woman would even overthink why the man ended that text with a period. Because of situations like that, I think men could really work on their communication skills with women. (7663)

2. I love how men are simple lovers. They love you and protect you as long as you keep them well-fed, sexually satisfied, and don't intentionally project negativity in their daily lives. Their expectations are clear-cut while women, on the other hand, are emotionally oriented and have dense and complicated expectations. I dislike, however, that men are able to completely disregard this discrepancy between what women expect and invest in a relationship. Men easily go their way the second another woman is able to provide their simple needs. They do not realize how much more there is then meets the eye of what a woman does for a man they love and break strings as simply as that. A man can easily destroy a woman's trust and concept of love through an insensitive break up, after a woman built and defined their love after months and oftentimes years. (8638)

2. In general there are many things I like about the opposite sex and I think they are wonderful and I enjoy being around them. They have a protective nature to them and whether it is a friend or a boyfriend there is a sense of physical comfort in having a guy friend near by. I also enjoy that men are decisive there is not a lot of debating over decisions such as where to go to dinner, but rather they know what they want and they take steps to get it. I enjoy being around guys because they are less drama oriented. I find that they do not gossip as much as girls and they in general are much more easy going. In addition I enjoy the physical strength of guys and their emotional stability. One thing that really drives me crazy about guys is they always have to be right. When it comes to an argument or discussion it will not be over until their viewpoint is the one that’s evaluated. Sometimes they can be stubborn in this way and it is hard to get them to switch out of their own mindset in order to see another viewpoint. In addition I get frustrated that guys don’t pick up on hints and subtle body language etc. To me sometimes when I see a guy interact with a girl like his girlfriend it is so obvious to me that he just isn’t picking up on something that is emotionally going on with her and I have also experienced this in my own life. (0423)

2. I like that men are straightforward and simple- they often tell you what they think and don’t wait for you to guess or continually ask them what is wrong or how they are feeling. Females aren’t as straightforward with their emotions and feelings and will sometimes hide them and expect you to ask about their emotional state. Men tend to sugarcoat things less and oftentimes you know what they say is what they really think and consequently you are able to take what they say for face value whereas with females you sometimes have to read into what they say. Something I dislike about men in general is that they are hesitant to be emotional, nurturing, and sensitive. They aren’t always good at picking up on emotions or being comforting in situations where someone might be upset. I feel that many men are so invested in proving their manhood and hide many things because they don’t want to be seen as weak. Men are even hesitant to order certain kind of drinks because they think it will make they seem “gay” or girly. I really don’t like when men get in fights or become aggressive just so they can prove how tough they are, I find this to be an incredibly unattractive trait. I believe that this manly persona encouraged by society keeps men from expressing who they really are and who they want to be. (1252)

2.) What I like about the opposite sex is that they are drama free, don’t care about their appearance and looking good. I find guys more down to Earth and they are brutally honest. They don’t seem to have a hidden agenda unlike females do. What I dislike about the opposite sex is that they are obsessed with porn and sex and they don’t come across as very nurturing when you need emotional support. They act egocentric especially when they feel the need to act like a man. Another part I don’t like about the opposite sex is that they use derogatory terms to describe girls and their body parts and do cat calls with them. (5702)

2.) In general, I like that men are strong and beautiful creatures. They are very animalistic in nature, which tends to mean they are simple. If it weren’t for men, I think this world would become much more complex and confusing. Men are straightforward and usually direct in expressing how they feel and what they want. Even though they may not always say how they feel, when they do it is almost always the truth. Men simplify things in a way that makes emotions easy to understand.(1324)

2. In general, there are several qualities that I like about the opposite sex. One of the qualities that I like the most is that they are extremely protective. I find it comforting to know that in harmful or scary situations a man would be willing to stand up for and protect a woman. I also like that men are able to focus less on what people think about them. Considering the men that I have interacted with in the past, I feel that they walk around with a confidence that allows them to focus on other more important things instead of worrying about what someone is thinking about them. One thing that I dislike about the opposite sex, however, is their initial reaction to be aggressive in certain situations. I feel that men automatically use their defensiveness and aggressive nature in situations where they are not always appropriate or necessary. (8417)

2. My favorite quality of the opposite sex would have to be their sense of humor. I typically find that men are far more accepting of both giving and receiving sarcasm and/or playful insults while women are far more likely to not see the humorous side of a joke, whether due to insecurity or just plain disinterest in fooling around. Interestingly enough I also find the biggest quality I dislike in men to be their tendency to step over the line with derogatory sentiment when gathered in large groups of other men when their testosterone gets going. (6503)

2. Something I really admire about males are that they are simple and it is easy to determine what they want. Women often tend to over-analyze and complicate situations whereas males are content with a set few things and don’t play as many mind games. Guys don’t stand around and gossip about other people nearly as often as women do, and they tend to be much more drama-free. Something I don’t like is that men tend to clam up quickly when they feel like they don’t have control in a situation. Sometimes they are afraid to ask for help when they need it, or afraid to offer help when they see their girlfriend needs someone to be there for her. Men often get scared of saying too much, and in turn end up saying nothing at all. (8993)

I like that men are more easy going and less emotional than women. It’s nice to watch guys’ relationships, which have much less drama than girls’. It seems so much less draining to take things more lightheartedly, which can often be hard for women. I also like that men are assertive. I like that they can ask girls on dates without a mind-numbing fear of rejection. I like that they are more willing to confront others about problems and deal with them head-on. I like that men are spontaneous. It’s amazing how they can make plans so last minute, and yet they usually work out just fine. If women make spontaneous plans, it will be a disaster because someone wasn’t invited, or someone didn’t want to go there, or someone already had other plans. I don’t like that men are sometimes emotionally indifferent or unavailable. Sometimes when talking to guys, it seems like they don’t care about a situation, even though it’s extremely important or sad. I don’t think that’s the case, but since it is so difficult for men to communicate their emotions, it’s hard to know what’s actually going on, and it makes them seem inattentive. I also don’t like that their assertiveness can easily be turned into aggressive behavior. I think there is a time to be assertive, but there is also a time to back down. And more often than not, it’s men over women who become aggressive unnecessarily. Finally, I don’t like the focus men put on women’s bodies. Men will say they don’t really care about bodies or sex, or tell women they look great the way they are, but when they ogle at half-naked women all the time (on tv, in magazines, on the street), it’s hard to believe they really don’t care. And if they admit that’s the most important thing to them, it makes it seem like women are less important than men, something provided merely for their pleasure, not people themselves.

I like how men do not hold grudges. I see it especially with their friends. If a friend messes up, they address the issue once and never hold it against them. I envy their ability to do so because grudges cause drama. I also like that men are confident. Confidence is very attractive and I like to see men who are sure of themselves physically, mentally, and emotionally. I like that men are easy going. They do not focus on little things and they do not let small issues bother them. I like that men are not high-maintenance. They do not require a whole lot and do not get as caught up in material things as girls do. Though I said I liked when men are confident, I do not like when they are over-confident. Cockiness is a pet peeve. I do not like when guys think they are better than anyone. They need to find a good balance when it comes to confidence. I do not like that it is all about sex for guys. I hate that sex is the only thing that they care about. It makes girls question if men’s perceived love is for our personalities or for sex. In addition, I hate that guys have such high standards for girls. They expect girls to have a perfect body with a natural face and perfect hair. Yet they complain when girls wear too much makeup and are constantly trying to lose weight.(3651)

I like how they can have completely different interests than you, but you can meet those whose differences mesh very well with your likes and dislikes. They are also better in some ways than having friendships or relationships with other girls, because they don’t have the same type of chemical balance and thought process as girls do, making it sometimes easier to talk to and figure things out. It’s nice when you share the same values with the opposite sex, because usually the brain power of the two sexes put together can provide for very interesting results. (5857)

I like how men generally do not hold grudges, do not try to read too much into what others say about them, and that they are strong. I like how men are not catty and are generally straightforward. I do not like how men treat women as objects and act as if their main motivation for doing nice things for women is because they think it will persuade women to sleep with them. Men are frequently arrogant and are easily instigated, which can be really frustrating. (9031)

There are many things I both like and dislike about the opposite sex. The first thing I really like about the opposite sex is their ability to be straightforward. For example, if they don’t like your shoes they will tell you don’t like them, whereas a girl might say they do like them when they don’t. Also, I like the protective nature they have. I live with my boyfriend and when he is home I feel much safer then when I’m home alone because I know that if something were to happen he is there to protect me. I also really like how laidback guys can be. If you want to do something they will usually always be down to do it, without taking an hour to get ready or asking a million questions, they just go with the flow. There are also things I don’t like about men, particularly their lack of cleanliness. I don’t know why they think its okay to never clean their bathrooms or clean up their trash but it is absolutely disgusting. Another thing I don’t like is how sex-focused they are. Sex seems to be their end goal all the time no matter the situation. I think this goes hand in hand with the lack of maturity I see in many men. Lastly, I don’t like how uncommunicative men can be. When the topic is about something they want to talk about they could talk/listen for hours, but the second it turns to something they are less interested in they check out and its hard to get more than a sentence out of them. (9232)

2. I can come to dislike the things that I like about the opposite sex when I am in a committed relationship with a guy

I’m a big fan of guys as friends. I can’t sort out the reasons why. I like how they are chill, they don’t gossip, and they don’t judge as much as girls do. They take what I say as is, without reading too far into it. They aren’t always worried about things and I don’t have to talk about my feelings. We don’t have to talk about petty small talk and we can joke and laugh. Nothing gets serious. There can be silence without it being awkward. We don’t have to talk about other people. They’re usually down to have fun and are not overly obsessed about what people will think of them.. Well, at least they don’t’ show it. They aren’t as stressed out and high strung as girls are and because of that, I’m more able to relax around them and just be myself.

I don’t like how they aren’t good at accessing their feelings. You’ll ask them something personal and they’ll be caught off guard, like they’re never actually really given too much deep thought about the answer. They won’t explain how they’re feeling. They’ll give short and blunt answers, so I’ll be the one reading into it, wishing they would explain just a tad bit more. Sometimes they are jerks, and think that just because they didn’t say anything mean that they aren’t hurting a girls feelings. They don’t realize that NOT doing something can hurt just as much as doing something wrong.

The same reasons why I like them: that they are chill, easy going, and not overly wrapped up in their feelings – can make me crazy. When I want a guy to notice that he did something wrong but don’t want to tell him, (because it counts more when he realizes it himself) when I want him to be attentive to my feelings. I don’t’ like that many men they objectify women. Yes, women can have nice bodies but if only that could just be a plus to them and they didn’t make attractiveness the biggest factor in deciding who they want to talk to or take out. I don’t like how many guys are very shallow but ya know… I’m not one to talk. (1109) 2. As discussed in class some of the qualities that I like about men are their assertiveness, loyalty to friends, spontaneous actions, and that they are less dramatic than women are. When making decisions or wanting to accomplish something men are much more assertive, and are not afraid to go after what it is that they may want. They are also more willing to do things in the spur of the moment and not afraid to get their hands dirty or take risks. Men are also less dramatic than woman are, they do not go off and gossip about what some other dude was wearing or how much of a “slut” he looked like which relates to how they are more loyal to friends. Most times they are blunt with friends and do not beat around the bush when trying to say something to a friend. Qualities of males that I dislike are that they are cocky, do not always show emotions, and double standards. Some men may be putting on a show but others are serious about the comments they make about themselves that make them seem great. There is a big different between bragging/being cocky and confidence; however most men do not know the difference. Men rarely show emotion, but sometimes it would be nice for them to show that they care not only through romantic actions but also with words. Lastly it is social acceptable for guys to be going out/sleeping with multiple women, but if a women was doing that then she would be deemed a “whore.” What’s the difference between a man and woman doing that? It is not acceptable for either to be doing so, but I do not know why men are praised for it and women are not. 9295

I really like the role as protector that men generally feel. Actually, I feel fairly confident that I’m actually ok with most gender role characteristics. I think that the problem is when there isn’t a balance and no moderation. I enjoy the man acting as protector but I am not a damsel in distress that can’t stand up for herself. I am capable of protecting myself when necessary but I love when a guy can defend me if, for example, a guy purposely cuts me in line at a cafe. I dislike the fact that men are generally not as emotionally in-tune with themselves. I find it so frustrating that they can’t as deeply connect with things like a poem or a sappy story. Their level of empathy is not impressive sometimes. (1160)

2. I really like that men are so protective of women. It’s always so nice when a man put his arm around you as you’re walking along a busy street at night, or walks you to your car. I really appreciate that chivalry. I also admire men’s need to always serve the women they are with, take care of them, and provide for them. Sometimes, as a very independent woman, it can come off as a bit of over kill when they try to do too much to serve you. I am fully capable of opening my own door, and doing a few handy things around the house, but all in all I really appreciate those chivalric gestures. I also like that men are athletic, and like to show off their physical capabilities. Though I love how strong and physically able men are, physicality is also one things that I dislike most in men. I hate how men feel the need to prove themselves physically. There is a time and a place. You don’t always need to brag about how much you can bench or many times you’ve lifted weights that day. Just be a strong humble man. It doesn’t go unnoticed and is far worse when it is a constant topic of conversation. I also strongly dislike how selfish men can be. Especially when it comes to physical acts with women, men seem to feel that their physical satisfaction is most important. Whether that is a conscious thought or not, men seem to frequently view women as tools to fulfill their sexual pleasure rather than seeing them as equal sexual human beings themselves. (8077)

2. I like that the opposite sex is not afraid to be themselves almost at all times. They can be loud and goofy whenever they want and they tend to make me laugh more than girls do. I think they are more spontaneous than women. I dislike that most men think they always have to be right or have the upper hand. (7100)

2. A quality that I truly admire about men is their ability to speak their mind. Men are willing to tell you the truth whether you are going to like the answer or not. In general, women tend to be more cautious about what we say in order to avoid hurting other people’s feelings. In addition, men are much more willing to be real with women than women are with other women. Men can handle the sarcastic jokes, the bitchy comeback, and rough housing, whereas women are quick to judge, easily offended, and often too busy acting overtly feminine to just have a good time with the guys. A serious quality that I dislike about men is their inability to express emotion. Obviously, I believe this stems as a result of gender norms that are forced upon men in our society, but nonetheless it is incredible frustrating to feel like you have to pry into an individual’s life in order for them to tell you that they are upset about a particular issue. Generally, in my experience, men tend to shut down and push others away when they are in an emotional state that they are uncomfortable with or unsure of how to deal with it. (0946)

2. Like – they are straightforward; easy going; protective; less “catty”; don’t tend to hold a grudge Dislike – Not serious when they should be; make rash decisions; cocky (more than just confident); not expressive (verbally or physically); avoid commitment for as long as possible as often as possible; immature (7437)

2) I like that the opposite tends to have a positive outlook on life. Where many women would adopt a path of pessimism, in my experience, males prefer to look forward and move on quickly. Women like to dwell on their situations and mull over how they may have reacted differently to render another result. Males on the other hand appear move on faster. The see things as water under the bridge faster than women do. What I dislike about males is their general disorganization and messiness. The stereotype that men don’t pick up after themselves has been what I have encountered amongst many men in my experience. It seems as though cleanliness is not a very high priority for most males. (3886)

2. There are a lot of qualities I like and dislike about men. The ones I enjoy is their ability to not hold grudges and to forgive easily. I also like their protective instinct; I feel most men are willing to defend and protect the ones they love. Another quality I like about men is their technical skills; such has fixing things that are broken. In my experience, men are much more willing to offer to assistance in regards to handy work. However, there are qualities I dislike about men as well. I dislike their inability to express emotion or simply their lack of emotion. I also dislike their obsession with women’s bodies and their objectification of women. This is not true for all men, however, I have encountered a vast number of young men encouraging double standards and treating women as objects. (4610)

2. In general I like how the opposite sex, males, are so much less dramatic then females. My male friends always are more relaxed and solve problem with a straightforward manner instead of beating around the bush, causing unneeded problems, as females tend to do. I also like how males have strength, which makes me feel protected and safe. They have a confident manner, which makes them appear strong, making myself feel safer when I am around a male. I generally do not like how men communicate. Overall, I believe that men and women have very different communication patterns. In my experience men and more closed off and less emotional, and when I want to talk about something emotional to my boyfriend it is often difficult for him to properly communicate with me. Sometimes I want him to share emotions with me and I feel like he believes that he cannot and he holds himself back from conveying emotion in his communication behavior.

2. In general, I like that males are easy-going, carefree, spontaneous, direct, protective, and less dramatic than females. They don’t overanalyze things the way that females do and often take things at face value. They are more simple minded. My boyfriend and guy friends do not stress out over every little thing that I do and they often calm me down when I am anxious. I dislike that they are often poor communicators, messy, aggressive, not very attentive, less empathetic, and don’t like asking for help. My boyfriend often shuts down when he is dealing with tough emotions. He says he doesn't want to talk about it or if he does talk about it, he is usually apathetic. Men struggle more with expressing emotions especially those that are negative. (8531)

I really like that the opposite sex is very straightforward about things. Yes, this can be negative if they say something you don’t want to hear, but I was looking for the truth I would go to a guy to ask. They don’t waste time playing games or beating around the bush for what they want. If they like a girl they’ll text her, and if not they won’t, end of story. Although they are very straightforward, guys can be very immature at my age. Scientifically it is proven that males mature more slowly than females, and this is the age when it starts to become more apparent. For example, boys will have burping contests when this will gross out girls. They like to watch stupid shows about beer and the objectivity of women, while girls find these not amusing. They look for women with good bodies rather than good hearts, and care more for frat parties than dinners. I might be generalizing a lot here, but the women at LMU that I have spoken to tend to feel the same way.

On a basic level, I like men’s bodies. I like they way they tend to have an emotional strength, and seem less inclined to let little things get them upset. I like the way they tend to be more straightforward with what they want and what they are thinking. I like how they often assume the role protector. I like they way men tend to worry less. I also dislike some things about men, such as they way they tend to be guarded with their emotions even in situations that warrant an emotional response. I dislike the way men can be non-committal. I dislike that men tend to be more rash. I dislike that they tend to be less observant. (4669)

2. I like that men tend to be far less dramatic than women. After going to an all-female high school and then coming to a co-ed college, I can say that it has been so much easier to have guy friends because they aren't as sensitive, gossipy, or willing to create problematic situations out of nothing. While I like that guys tend to be easy-going, I think it's annoying when they are unable to communicate or unwilling to talk about the feelings. I don't expect them to want to talk as much as women do, but there is certainly a middle ground that many men don't manage to meet us at. (8359)

2. Something that I like in the opposite sex is their power and dominance in some matters. I am an independent girl but I like a guy that can take charge and does not always depend on me to make decisions, or a guy that I could mutually make decisions with. I like does not agree with me on something just to make me happy but will discuss with me the points on which he disagrees and why. I dislike some men's cockiness. It is very attractive when a man has the power without having to show it off to make himself feel more powerful. (8436)

2. In general, I like that the male species is straightforward, brave, handy, masculine, less dramatic, and assertive. In general, I like that they are messy, have selective hearing, cocky, immature, and the idea of the double standard. (6536)

2. In general I like that guys are bigger and stronger than girls. It makes me feel safe when I with a strong and confident guy. I like that they are sometimes more straight forward than girls. They don’t really beat around the bush. If they don’t agree with something or think something is stupid they will just say that it is stupid. They are a lot less drama too. Probably because they do not gossip as much or over analyze things. I don’t like when guys get cocky or look at girls like meat. It is so insulting to walk down the street and get whistled at like a dog. I don’t like it either when men will stare at a women’s breast constantly. Its very distracting to try and talk to someone and you can clearly tell where their eyes are wondering to. Lastly the most annoying thing a guy can do is make fun of a girl because of her period. A lot of guys throw out comments like oh she’s acting like a bitch she must be on her period. I hate that women are made fun of for something that is natural and essential for life. (2321)

  1. 2 A lot of the things I like about men are the things that also annoy me the most when they are in excess. For example, I like that guys are straightforward and tell you how they’re feeling and what they’re thinking without playing mind games. It’s nice because you know exactly when and why they are mad, and how you can make things better. If a guy is too straightforward, though, it gets boring. Fast. Also, I like that guys feel the need to protect women, but that can also get annoying because I am a feminist and thoroughly enjoy my independence. I really don’t like how over-protective and jealous men can be because I believe that a relationship is all about trust. If you’re dating somebody, you should trust him or her enough to not betray you. At the same time, it can be sort of sweet when a guy gets jealous or protective over me because I know that means they care. (0497)

2. I love men, in general. I love that they are rational-minded humans. While I overthink and overanalyze, men just take it as it is and don’t make things complicated. I like the fact that they are protective. They often feel the need to keep you safe and allow you to trust them easier. Men are very handy, they are mostly able to fix things. I also like the fact that they are decisive, they know what they want and they don’t go back and forth. The main thing I don’t like about men is that they are egotistical. It frustrates me that they have a hard time accepting when they are wrong. Men often mistaken being protective with being controlling and overbearing. I don’t like the fact that they cannot multitask and have selective hearing. I also dislike the fact that men have to be told multiple times to do something before they actually get the task done, they are not proactive and impulsive as women usually are. They are more laid back and take their time.(0613)

2. Qualities I like about males are: how they do not overanalyze situations, how they can get over fights quickly, chivalry, protectiveness, how they are more likely to be physically active, how they are easy going and all around easier to be around at stressful times. What I dislike are: how they can sometimes have no regard for women’s feelings, how they can become overtly competitive, their lack of hygiene, they’re inability to have emotions when making decisions (sometimes) and how some men have social standards about how women should be. (9164)

2. I like the protective quality that many people of the opposite sex have. I feel like most men have this protective-defensive approach that applies to friends, family, and relationships. I also like that they seem to be very low maintenance. Socialization has made make-up enhancement a thing for women, whereas men are taken as they are without embellishments. 3066

2. What I like most about men is how protective they are of the women in their life. To the degree that a man is willing to stand up and physically or emotionally protect a woman correlates with how much they care about that woman. In the end everyone likes to know that they are loved and cared for and protection is a way to nonverbally show that you love them to some degree. On the other hand, I do not like it when men come off as insensitive. If I am coming to you for advice or comfort, it is rude to brush off my feelings. I understand that women are more emotional then men and they have a harder time to relate to our feelings but that is not an excuse to be insensitive. (5659)

2. I really like that men can often have fights with their friends but then make up with them pretty easily. They tend to be more direct about what is bothering them than women are and they are less passive-aggressive and that makes it easier to communicate with people and get into less fights. What I do not like about men is that they tend to be “sex-driven” and care much more about the physical parts of a relationship as opposed to the intimate parts of the relationship, such as getting to know each other as people. They also tend to have large egos and feel they have to prove themselves dominant over other men. (6617)

2. The likes, jawlines, their confidence, they are chill/no drama, minimal/low key and their protective instincts. Dislike, their overpowering sex drive, I’m not saying it’s a bad thing, I’m just saying I don’t like it since most of the time my significant other will assume I want it as much as him. Also, prideful, not in tune with emotions, stubborn. (7302)

I like that men are very logical beings. Being raised by men, I find that I was raised to look at situations in this particular way. I find that they are more capable of making decisions that are not clouded by their emotions, which in turn makes for better long term decisions. (3231)

I like that the opposite sex is protective over the people they love. Their willingness to stand up for or defend these people is incredibly attractive. I also like how men are straightforward. Men tend to handle situations without making them complex or dramatic. They tackle the situation at hand instead of making an argument about fifty other things like women tend to. I dislike that men have such a high sex drive to the point that it is almost overwhelming. Of course sex is enjoyable, but men have a tendency to act sexual at the most inappropriate times. 453

In general, what I like most about the opposite sex is that men are more protective, low maintenance, athletic and comforting. What I dislike the most about the opposite sex is that men are more aggressive, sex-driven, and callous and fear to show emotion or sensitivity (even if the situation calls for such emotionality). (9140)

2. I like that men are more laid back and do not seem to take situations or themselves too

seriously. Instead of overthinking or overanalyzing a situation or someone else’s actions, guys tend to take things at face value. For instance, if a guy’s friend arrives to lunch late, he may simply ask his friend why he was late or not even say anything at all. He would not think about what this action may indicate about their friendship or if his friend is hiding something from him or lying. I dislike that men are more impulsive and willing to do dangerous things to protect their reputations or impress others. For instance, when a guy’s friends dare him to do something reckless, he will do it and try not to show any feelings of apprehension. A guy would rather risk his personal safety that to have his bravery or strength questioned. (7413)

2. In general, the things I like about men are that they are athletic and strong—I find it attractive to watch them play sports or get really excited and passionate about a sports game. Also, having an athletic and strong physique is something I like about men. I like that men have confidence and I like that they take charge in difficult or sketchy situations. For instance, if my tire was flat, I like that a man would take charge and help fix it. For the sketchy situations, for example, if I were being harassed a guy takes charge and makes me feel protected and gets me away from an unwanted situation. Also, I like that men keep a pretty consistent emotional demeanor—meaning their emotions are not going haywire and they aren’t tipped off by the littlest inconveniences.

2. Aforementioned, I said some guys are direct and will tell you how it is without beating around the bush. I like that because it is refreshing. Guys are also not very dramatic and they are very “chill.” Some, if not most, guys have a very witty and dry sense of humor, and that is something I like. Also, guys have the tendency to be more ‘protective’ and that is something that I like too. Some things that I don’t like about guys is how gross/messy they can be, but this can be the same for girls. Some guys are also not very observant in areas we want them to be. Guys overcompensate for a lot, and are often hypersexual. These are things that I don’t like about the opposite sex. (0018)

In general the things that I dislike about men are that they can be stubborn and always feel the need to be right. This can make any debate or argument difficult because they are stuck in their own ways and refuse to take into consideration other peoples opinions or advice because of their own stubbornness or ego. I also don’t like that men can be really messy and sloppy. I don’t like that men are so clueless about women’s emotions because it seems that unless we explicitly tell them exactly what is wrong they cannot pick up on the cues telling them that something is wrong. And even so, when you do explain what is bothering you—they still can be entirely clueless and not recognize why it’s a problem or just don’t want to put in the effort to understand. I don’t like that in general men do not have a filter for what they are saying and can be incredibly inappropriate and vulgar—saying things in front of girls and even their girlfriend that is crude and makes girls feel uncomfortable.

  1. I like the freedom in which men seem to live. Most seem relatively uninhibited and unapologetic about the manner in which they live their lives. I also admire their lack of emotional aggression — in my experience, men don’t often elicit drama or hold grudges against others. However, this unapologetic aspect of men’s personality may also turn into excessive stubbornness and unwillingness to admit to being wrong. (9166)

When it comes to men, I enjoy how straightforeward they are. If they have a problem with one another they will tell them to their face and ten minutes later they are back to being friends. They say what they think which is often refreshing and you can count on them to be honest about their thoughts. I dislike on the other hand how confrontational men seem to be. Its as though when angry they look for a fight which often leads to a physical confrontation. (9609)

2. Generally what I find most appealing about the opposite sex is humor, their strength, protectiveness, and their nonchalant nature. The strength most men have is not only physically appealing but also very useful for heavy-lifting and their height is useful for when someone like me cannot reach a top shelf. Protectiveness goes hand in hand with masculinity. Men show their masculinity by being concerned for their significant other’s safety and well-being. However, there is a fine line between being protective and being possessive. This is not a trait distinct to men, there are many women that are considered crazy or jealous because they are constantly concerned as to where their significant other is. What I mean by nonchalant nature is that men are very relaxed and flexible with their time. They do not desire drama of any sorts and they are very accommodating. I dislike that that men are clueless of the hints women sometimes drop. I do not necessarily mean that every guy should be able to read the minds of women, however, I definitely feel that they could be a bit more observant and considerate of women’s emotions. This leads into their “closed-off” behavior towards their partners. Men view portraying their emotions as a sign of weakness, when they should view it as a way to connect with their partner on a deeper level. (2775)

I like that the opposite sex seems to trigger so many emotions for each other. Whether that be because of feelings, conversations, words, interactions — there are always so many follow up reactions about encounters that go on between a male and female. Although a lot comes along with those feelings, good and bad, it’s stimulating to even have interactions like that which I think are far more different than same sex interactions. I also like the instant feeling of protection that I feel around men.

I dislike the way that their hyper masculinity can get in the way of truly connecting with women and the pride that they have to put aside to empathize and understand the way the women naturally want to nurture and care for a male that they care about. (8701)

#3. What is the one thing that the opposite sex most misunderstands about your own sex?

  1. I think most men chalk women up to being extra emotional and irrational. But in reality, I think most women are very strong and logical. (7407)

3. The one thing that men most misunderstand about women is their sensitivity. Men can be rude and insensitive and say cruel things to women and don’t understand that their words can have a very negative impact. However, at the same time, they make comments about our sensitivity by saying things like , “don’t be so sensitive” which only escalates the frustration and furthers the problem. (9994)

3. One thing men misunderstand about women is that we are “crazy”, “over-emotional”, and dramatic. What guys should understand is that it is not that we have no control over our emotions, it is that we express our emotions, where as men are not as likely to do that. Women may over analyze and think about situations in more details, but I think there is something special in being able to understand our emotions that helps us to grow into the people we want to become.

3.Men most often misunderstand that just because women invest a lot into relationships and the people they care about, does not mean that we are being overly sensitive or dramatic. I understand that guys tend to think about things differently than girls do, but using the “emotional” or “menstrual” label for women is just an ignorant way of undermining our opinions.(2955)

3. I think that men most often misunderstand women's emotions. Men can be so oblivious when women are happy, sad, flirty, or many other emotions. They don’t understand intentions, moods, and how women react to every situation. (8237)

3. I would say that the opposite sex most misunderstands that women who speak their mind or aren’t afraid to voice their opinion, regardless of how brutally honest it is, are not being “bitchy”. Men often label women as being a bitch or bitchy when they don’t hesitate to say the truth or what their own opinion is. 3066

3. Men don’t understand the emotions of women. When trying to explain a situation to a man it is best to leave out any sign of emotion and use logical principles alone. Men believe that women are over emotional and dramatic because women have trouble separating logic from emotion. Men misunderstand that an emotional reaction may be laced with a logical explanation. Rather than seeing that a woman may have a point, even if it is a dramatic one, men filter out this logic and boil it down to the woman being “crazy.” (6259)

3. I think men generally see women as sensitive and emotional. They assume we are “clingy” or “needy” when we call or text them. Maybe we genuinely want to know how your day is going. They also see us as overly emotional, and have a tendency to misread whatever emotion we are actually feeling. (2662)

  1. 3. I think men mostly misunderstand the goal of catharsis and venting. Not only from my experience but from many of my other girl friends’ experiences with venting and expressing their emotions, we intend to be intimately and carefully heard and understood. We don’t wish to place all our problems onto our friends and have them solve it for us, we just want to be listened to, receive verbal affirmations, and be comforted by someone we trust. My guy friends and some of my ex-boyfriends have a difficult time in supporting friends during these vents because they’ve told me they want to do something about it but they don’t know what to say. (0531)

3. Personally, I believe that the one thing that males most misunderstand about females is the thought process of females. Men often complain that they have no idea what a woman is thinking and women can often become frustrated because the man does not understand where she is coming from or what is bothering her. I have heard many men complain that they should not be expected to read a woman's mind. But, I do not think that women want men to be able to read their mind, women instead would like the man to pick up on the subtle clues that she is providing to understand her better. If men were better able to pick up on these subtle clues and understand the female thought process better, there would be far less arguments and miscommunication between the genders. (2992)

3. I think they think we are extremely unsafe or oblivious when it comes to going out partying or drinking, but in reality females try to be very safe and protective of one another. I feel like they think we are easily available and willing to put out more than we actually are or appear to be. We can tell when a situation is bad news, for the most part. (6858)

  1. Assuming that anger or other strong emotions are because we’re on our period is a big thing that men tend to misunderstand about women. Feeling passionately enough about something to vocalize it doesn’t necessarily mean that. Also, hormones don’t have full control over our emotions during that time; we don’t become completely different people, so what we say or feel must have some grounds somewhere within us. (9166)

3. I would say women’s emotions. Men have a hard time understanding why we take the little things to heart, why we say we are fine when we are not and why we can hold grudges so long. These are all things that derive from our emotions and most of the time we get upset because men disregard to easily something that we find meaningful or important. (5369)

I think that males overthink the sensitivity we carry with ourselves and fail to realize that sometimes these sensitivities are triggered by the actions of males. Getting reactions like, “why do girls even care when a guy does this?”, or “does she really think that that picture looks good?” are definitely things that trigger sensitive feelings amongst the opposite gender without even realizing that insecurities also stem from this. (8701)

3. Ithink guys misunderstand the emotional needs of women the most. Because they do not have the same needs, it is very difficult for them to understand that women have so many. I think many women need a guy to constantly be there for them and guys don’t understand that need. (6991)

3. I think men think that all women want a man to fix their problems, when in actuality women just want someone to talk to- someone to listen to them and tell them that everything will be okay. When I first started dating my boyfriend, I would call him and vent to him about a bad day I had and instead of listening to me vent, he would get irritated of me complaining and just say, “well what do you want me to do about it?” The answer is nothing. We don’t want or need men to fix our problems- we can handle it ourselves. But what we do want and need is someone to listen to our problems, show genuine concern, and then be there to support us and encourage us to keep going even when the going gets tough. (2307)

3.I think that they don’t realize how smart we are and how quickly we can detect when we are being put off or taken advantage of. They don’t understand why we freak out when they haven’t verbally stated anything wrong—but really that’s why…it’s because they are making it extremely obvious that something is wrong nonverbally. (0572)

3) Men are not able to understand women’s emotions and they often find themselves helpless when dealing with women’s feelings. Since they don’t experience the same type of emotions they don’t know how to act when a woman cries, since most of the time is for something they don’t even understand. This is the reason why women often have to explain to men in simple words what is it that hurt them in order for men to at least know which behaviors they’d better not repeat. (7500)

3.Males do not understand that females sometimes just want them to listen. We are not always looking for a solution to a problem. We are looking for support. Like in Modern Family, when Clare tells Phil (her husband) that she is always stuck in traffic, his natural response is "Just leave earlier." However, other women explain to him that really all she wants is someone to support her and agree with her, that traffic is in fact, terrible. Sometimes females just want to talk about things not necessarily looking for a solution to a problem. 6947

3.) I think men often unfairly view women as “needy” or “clingy.” Many women just want men to verbally express their feelings every so often, and might appear to be clingy in an attempt to get them to do that. In order for a women to feel secure in a relationship, she might need some verbal affirmations to feel like her feelings are being reciprocated. Though these affirmations don’t need to be constant, I think that men should be more aware that making an effort to verbally communicate their feelings occasionally might make a women feel more secure and less “clingy.” (2387)

3. The one thing that most men most misunderstand about women is the fact that we cannot detach emotions from sex to the extent that men can. The no strings attached relationship that most men in their young adulthood prefer to a traditional relationship is rarely ever successful on behalf of the woman. Women get emotional over almost everything, even an encounter with a stranger. You can only guess how much stronger their emotions regarding someone they have been having sexual relations with are. (8638)

3. Men always seem to think that women are too emotional. Without even getting to know a specific woman, men assume she will be clingy, cry easily, and be “crazy.” I honestly don’t know many females who fit this stereotype, unless they hide it extremely well. Actually, most of my previous boyfriends have been way more emotional than me, but in privacy and without the knowledge of their “bros” of course. (7663)

3. Some men think that women are too emotional and while it’s true we may have more emotional ups and downs I don’t think it is necessarily that we are too emotional, but that we are in touch with our emotions and express them more often than men. Some men also think that women are too needy emotionally and need to have verbal affirmations. I do agree that many women are need emotionally and require affirmation but I don’t think this is a bad thing especially since women often give these things to men it is only normal that we would expect them back. (1252)

3. Something I don’t think males understand are the emotions of a female. Men don’t get that women tend to feel things more often and strongly than men in situations. Men don’t feel comfortable around women who are in an emotional state because they don’t know how to fix the situation. (8993)

Men don’t understand that sometimes we just want them to listen and to be empathetic. Sometimes we just want someone to tell about how bad our day was and that’s it. It can be frustrating when there has to be a solution or where they do not allow the space for venting. Sometimes we just want someone to listen and someone to understand our experience.(0423)

3.The one thing I feel that guys misunderstand about the female gender is that they don’t understand emotions and how to comfort a woman when she is going through a tough time emotionally. I find that guys don’t understand how to comfort a woman when she’s feeling emotional and they give advice that may not be useful. This is why when I am going through a hard time and need to talk about my personal feelings I feel more comfortable talking with a woman. (5702)

3.) The one thing that the male sex most misunderstands about the female sex is their emotions! Females need affirming and nurturing just like we give males. And they need Men to express how they think and feel just like we do! Females are generally better at expressing their emotions but we desperately want to understand the emotions and feelings of Men. (1324)

Men generally appear to think that women are weak. Women may have less muscle mass than men do, but that does not mean they are weak. Rather, women are strong in different ways than men. Women seem to be seen this way because they are much more outwardly emotional than men are. (9031).

3. The major thing that I feel men do not understand about women is the importance we place on emotions. Females often express themselves through their emotions and like to share emotional events and aspects of their lives. When women do this, I feel that men automatically are turned off. I think that men need to be more open to understanding that using our emotions is how women communicate and if men took more time to realize this instead of disregarding our feelings, women would not seem so “confusing” or “complicated.” (8417)

I think sexual intent is something that is misunderstood by males about females. Men think that if a girl texts back or says okay when asked on a date that she is going to have sex with him. Or if on the date the girl is flirting and kissing her date and then at the end of the date she doesn’t have sex with him she is considered a tease. I think this is the biggest misunderstanding between men and women because the women may be into the guy, and sex may eventually happen, but men think that if it doesn’t happen right away then its never going to happen and its going nowhere. (9232)

. I think guys underestimate how hard it is to be a girl and don’t realize that girls don’t always choose to get moody and emotional —sometimes they cannot control it. (hormones) They’re like “oohh they just have to wear high heels and shirts that flash their boobs. They have it so easy. Guys have to do all the work.” Girls have a lot more pressure put on them than most guys realize, and it is the men who create this pressure. Do they think that we like PMSing?? That is it fun for us? Do they think that we feel good about ourselves after we irrationally act like a bitch? No. Do they think that we like having all these hormonal emotions and feelings? No. Sometimes girls don’t have a choice whether they are moody or not, it comes with being a girl. (1109)

I think men most misunderstand that women don’t want to be ogled. I think they think is a compliment to that woman. And sure, a compliment on our appearance is nice every once in a while, but there are things that are more important to us and that would make us happier if they were noticed. We want to be more than a piece of meat, or an accessory on your arm. It’s not a compliment to stare all night.

A common misconception of men have of women is our emotions. It is almost like them expect us to constantly hide our true emotions from them. If we show even a little bit of what we are feeling, they automatically think we are being too overdramatic. It is hard for women to suppress our emotions. In fact, suppression most often makes us more emotional. When we bottle up emotion in attempt to avoid being accused of being overdramatic, it is likely that all of that stored emotion will explode over a little thing. (3651)

3. One thing that men most often misunderstands about women are emotions. Although men can easily brush off something, most women cannot and I think it is really hard for men to grasp that concept. Women are sensitive and do not let anything go, no matter how much we try and men just do not know how to deal with that. Men probably think women overreact most of the time, but if they sat down and actually took the time to listen to everything that women have to say they would see that we feel things more intensely than they do but it really comes from a good place. 9295

Men most definitely don’t understand empathy as well as women. A woman can frequently be brought to tears by hearing a stranger’s sad story whereas men can quickly disregard it after a brief moment of acknowledgement. I think often of my love of reading and analyzing poetry in this regard. I really enjoy deciphering and relating to a poem, trying to figure out its meaning. Men tend to like things that are more blatant and straight forward. (1160)

One thing that I would say that men misunderstand most about women is emotional complexity. Men constantly complain about how complex and hard to read women are. Though women clearly have very different ways of emotionally coping and dealing with situations, all humans are complex. Men are just as complex as women. Though these complexities may be in different aspects of life, humanity is inherently complex, so it seems to be a bit harsh to put all the blame on women as the most complex of the human race. (8077)

3. Most men are thoroughly confused about female emotions. We are emotional beings, far more so than they are, however there is still much to be said about it. Women are viewed as overly emotional by most media outlets and any expression of emotion is viewed as dramatic or over the top. The thing that men do not particularly seem to grasp is that often times we have very little control over our emotional states. I, personally, hate waking up and feeling overly emotional. I frequently think to myself, “What the hell is wrong with me today?” If men took the time to ask why we act like such emotional train wrecks, most would probably be surprised by our answers. (0946)

3. When we vent to them about a problem we just want them to listen we don’t want them to try to solve the problem for us. (7437)

3) I think that men characterize women as overemotional beings, who don’t have control over their own reactions. I think that, tying into this, I believe men hold the misconception that women enjoy acting dramatically and choose to act as such out of pleasure. (3886)

3. I truly don’t believe men don’t understand the pressures women feel to be beautiful and thin. Some of those pressures come from other women, but a majority comes from the male population and their distorted understanding of beauty. The time, effort, and money most women put into their appearance I think would shock and confuse most men. Women want to appear attractive to the opposite sex and therefore the only way to successfully end these types of pressures is to change the warped definitions of female beauty. (4610)

3. I think that the one thing that males most misunderstand about females is their friendly behavior and manners. Many males view a female’s friendly behavior as them being flirty, when that is not always the case. I have often found myself in a position when I was simply being friendly toward and individual of the opposite sex and they thought I was flirting with them. Overall, I think females have a friendly and nurturing aspect to their behavior and males often misunderstand such behavior.

3. One thing that males misunderstand about females is that females are not all that difficult to please. Yes, we experience complex emotions, however the one thing the majority of females want is simply to be shown love. A few loving phone calls or texts throughout the day and most females are satisfied. (8531)

Women are most misunderstood about their feelings. We tend to have more complex emotions than men, and have more of a desire to progress in relationships and settle down. Sometimes all I want to do is sit and talk, but boys are too entranced by video games and stupid T.V shows. Boys act as if they want to stay emotionally distant, when in reality they are doing for the show rather than themselves. (2431)

I think men misunderstand when girls dress nicely and think that we girls do it for them, when really we do it for ourselves. (4669)

3. Women find it therapeutic to talk about our problems. We like to vent, whether it's about emotions, daily issues, or other people. Most women seem to have an unspoken understanding that you are supposed to listen to your girlfriends about their problems and to offer encouragement and support, but that just because your friend is venting, does not mean she expects you to fix the problem. Sometimes it just helps to talk about it, and that's all you need. My dad or my guy friends can drive me crazy sometimes because all I want to do is talk about something that's bothering me, but they are determined to find solutions and do something about it rather than let me finish talking. I understand their logic and I realize that this can be somewhat counter-intuitive, but it can be frustrating when guys do this. Talking our problems out is therapeutic for women. (8359)

3. I believe that the most misunderstood thing about women from a man's perspective would be their neediness and clinginess. Most men seem to think that once a woman is in a relationship, she will eventually become needy and clingy. While I have noticed many of my friends take on that role once they are in a relationship, it has never been true about me. I like to show to my the guy I am with that I do not depend on them and I have seen that they find this very attractive. (8436)

3. The one thing that men misunderstand about women is what we are feeling because when they want us to talk we say nothing’s wrong and that we’re fine but when we do talk they sometimes have a tendency to tune us out.(6536)

3) I think guys don’t really understand a lot of our communication cues. For example they won’t get that if I haven’t said a word all day that something is wrong. Or they don’t try to engage in conversation to help a girl feel better, they may just shrug it off and walk away. I don’t think guys really understand how comforting their presence and words can be. They think we are just being dramatic instead of realizing how sad or hurt we actually are. (2321)

  1. 3 I’m a pretty big tomboy, so I don’t feel too much of a disconnect with guys for the most part, but there are definitely certain things that they can’t seem to understand about me. I feel like guys for the most part think girls are high maintenance and expect a lot from them when, in reality, we aren’t. When we say it’s the little things, we literally mean the little things. I don’t expect or necessarily want expensive gifts and fancy dates. Hanging out at home, making dinner and watching a movie would be a perfectly amazing date. Also, simple favors like offering to help me do the dishes or take out the trash would be a great way to show that he cares, just as much as a bouquet of flowers would. (0497)

3. I think the one thing men misunderstand about women is that they often assume that we make over analyze things and make them complicated on purpose. They do not allow themselves to explore their own feelings or thoughts as we do, thus they begin to react when women talk about their thoughts and feelings. (0613) 3. Something that is misunderstood by men about women is that women are not complicated as men think we are. We are simple. Just not the simple way that men want us to be. If a girl says she is “fine” when she is not, it is most likely not because she wants to fool you it is usually because she is more worried about how you would react to her. If a man is in that situation, I hate to say it, but he probably did something wrong. (9164)

3. Something males misunderstand about girls that they think we mean what we always say. When a girl says, “she is fine,” she usually is not fine but they take it literal. Guys should take into account the situations they find themselves in with girls and deeply consider if they are being vague or literal. (2501)

3. I think men misunderstand woman’s emotions more than anything. Women do tend to care more and are more sensitive to what others think about them. Just because you may not personally understand what or why women feel the way that they do, does not mean that you can discredit how they feel. Women are naturally more emotional creatures and men should understand and respect that to the best of their abilities. (5659)

3. Men often misunderstand how important listening is to women. They feel like they can listen to about every 3rd word and still completely understand everything we are trying to tell them. However, women like to explain things out so often only listening to half of what we tell them is not going to cut it. (6617)

3. I would say that a man misunderstands the needs and wants of female’s emotions. I would say women are easy, of course most men would say otherwise. In prior situations I’m sure women express their needs and wants, usually the man says he understands but a few days later it’s like he has no clue what’s going on. This causes a woman to get upset/emotional over something the guy should already know. I think the ladies just get tired of saying things over and over again and a start to assume that the guys should just already know since he’s been told numerous times in the past. (7302)

3. I think that guys most misunderstand women’s feelings and emotional states. They think that women are over-dramatic, or on their period if they have any strong emotions. I think that guys are sometimes scared of women’s emotions, so they oversimplify them or altogether discredit them. (0632)

3. I think a lot of the time, women can be afraid to say what they are thinking for fear of rejection. Men think that we always talk about our feelings and emotions, but a lot of women I know, including myself, actually hide what we are feeling because we don’t want to burden others with our problems. If I were to say something in a relationship that is bothering me I would be afraid that my counterpart wouldn’t want to work on the problem—he may just want to end the relationship, so he wouldn’t have to deal with it. (7100)

Men do not understand how much PMS affects our disposition. I am not typically an emotional person. But when a woman is PMSing, sometimes you just want to cry in the middle of the day for not logical reason. And I find that men misunderstand the passive aggression that often occurs as a result of PMS. We don't want to be bitches. We want you to understand that sometimes, when a woman is PMSing, silent company is all we really want or need. Guys often say, "it's not that big of a deal." But I'd like for a man to come back to me after his penis bleeds for a few days, his emotions are constantly and involuntarily fluctuating, and his back and gut feel like death and say, "it's not that big of a deal." (3231)

Most men misunderstand that being a woman is dangerous. The possibility of rape and sexual assault are harsh everyday realities that women have to deal with. Women must worry about acting a certain way or dressing a certain way so not to provoke unwanted attention. Men will never know what it is like to have to worry about their safety the way women do. 4531

I believe that men misunderstand the fragility of women. Just because women are more likely, and willing, so show emotion, it doesn’t necessarily mean that we are not able to take in hardships. For instance, I believe that if a man looks at a woman crying, he immediately freaks out and/or believes the woman is overreacting. I think men misunderstand expression with lack of control and drama. (9140)

#3 Men misunderstand that when women do not mean to pry to be nosy and gossip, but because they want to be of some help to them should they need someone to listen or give a word of advice (2259)

3. Men incorrectly think that women are too emotional, making them fragile. Although women may be more willing to get in touch with their emotions and are more socially intuitive, they are not more fragile than men. Men often think they need to censor themselves around women or may change the way they act around women. These changes in behavior are insulting because it indicates that men think that women are incapable of regulating their own emotional and mental states. (7413) 3. Body image issues. I feel like men don’t look so harshly at women’s bodies as women tend to look at their own bodies. Also men don’t judge their own bodies as harshly and tend to make changes by eating healthy and working out and not resorting to eating or body disorders

3. The male species misunderstands most about females would have to be our thought process when we expect males to know what we are thinking and feeling. I try to think about it from their perspective and take into consideration with how simple their thinking is and how little drama they like to deal with. If girls are always silent about an issue, there would be no way for a guy to read your mind and assume that you are upset about something. (9097)

3) One thing that men misunderstand about women is our “strength”. Men perceive us as weak because we express our emotions and are more sensitive, but we actually embody a lot of strength because of the societal obstacles that we have to overcome in our everyday lives. Even if we aren’t aware of it, we are constantly overcoming objectifications and assumptions regarding our abilities. Constantly having to prove our worthiness requires a strength that men haven’t developed. (9634)

3. I think that there are many things that guys don’t understand about girls, but I think that one thing is that guys don’t understand how sensitive girls can be. They sometimes don’t think through about what they’re saying and how it can affect the person they are talking to. Guys can be insensitive about the subject they are talking about and doesn’t understand the level of sensitivity that needs to be put into certain things. Girls don’t have the same humor as guys and definitely don’t process information the same way, and often times, this could lead to guys thinking girls are ‘too sensitive’ or ‘emotional.’ (0018)

3) The opposite sex which are men most misunderstands a girls train of thought. Boys don’t understand when a girl is really upset because girls usually say nothing but it’s the tone that gives it away. Boys need to stop and think about a girls feelings first before they assume it is all okay. Boys do not make the effort to try and figure out what is going on in the girls mind, instead they act clueless and act like they don’t understand what they did wrong. Men think that woman are dramatic. Woman express their feelings and men don’t see it or understand it and believe them expressing their emotions is an act of drama and being crazy. (4605)

3. I feel as though men, as a stereotype, sometimes view women as more emotional or weaker than they are. In the sense that they are incapable of separating their emotions from certain situations. I have also heard that men think women love to gossip and thrive off of drama. It is strange because as a girl I would agree that I do enjoy talking about others, however, I do not necessarily always speak of them poorly. Since women do much more enjoy communicating with each other, they form a bond through their similar interests. Also, I would like to add that drama is in fact entertaining to listen to at times, but personally I do not enjoy starting drama or being involved in drama. Men also do not understand that women want honesty. I would much rather a guy tell me that he is not interested in my right off the bat as opposed to dragging me on for a few months before doing so. This way there are not as many feelings involved and both parties can feel slightly more relieved. (2775)

#4. Think about a time when you found yourself particularly attracted to someone of the opposite sex. What characteristics of that person do you think attracted you? What was the most important factor that attracted you to this person, e.g., physical appearance, personality traits, self-confidence, social status, friendly gestures toward you, etc.?

  1. What most attracts me to men is if they are ambitious and motivated, which you can tell by the their job status, if they own a car, how the talk about their passions, etc. I also find a balanced confidence and good humor to be attractive. Lastly, I think it’s very attractive when men take pride in the way the look, like if they have good teeth, combed hair, a good outfit, etc. And then I obviously find other physical traits to be attractive such as being taller than me and things like that. (7407)

4. I feel like straight off I’m attracted to a man’s physical appearance and self-confidence. If they approach me and talk to me with an air of confidence I will be more inclined to want to get to know them. After completing that first interaction I then start to look at personality and sense of humor. I want to see if I will be able to build a relationship with that person and make sure they don’t bore me.

I’m extremely attracted to the way that a male interacts with my friends and family, shows genuine interest in my life and knows how to put their career and academics on the front-runner. Confidence is also attractive, but not when it becomes cocky and crosses the border or bragging and not making each experience genuine with the significant other. I also love manners and the idea of initiating the conversation, along with definitely taking looks into consideration, but almost to the point where personality makes up a lot of the looks. (8701)

4.Some characteristics that I am attracted to in men are the physical. Such as, their facial structure, facial hair, hair in general, eyes, back and shoulders, arms, and hands. What is most important is their personality. Specifically I like a guy’s inner confidence (a confidence in which he knows he a great person but does not need to prove it), humility, care for others (children, family, friends), ambition, and open-mindedness. The top two personality traits I find most important are ambition and open-mindedness. Additionally, a gesture towards me that I enjoy is looking at me when we have a conversation.(4012)

4. Humor is a big part of my personality, so I find it very attractive when a guy has a similar sense of humor or generally makes me smile. Along with that, I would say that guys who can carry a conversation and are approachable and easy to talk to attract me instantly.(2955)

4. The thing that most attracted me to my boyfriend was his confidence. I had heard a lot about him from friends and friends of friends but it wasn’t until I met him that I really saw the confidence he has, his smoothness in talking to people, and how funny he is. Those are the characteristics that most stood out to me. (8237)

4. I am attracted to men that are confident in themselves and don’t feel the need to be vocal. Of course this ends in frustration, as he is typically unwilling to have long conversations that I feel are necessary as a woman. A man can be confident and reticent but I will not be sexually attracted to him if he does not have the looks to match. I like a man with the typical “cowboy” looks. This means large muscles, strong jawline, and little effort put into his appearance. When a man has these looks coupled with the personality I am looking for, I find him sexually attractive. (6259)

4. In terms of physical attractiveness, I am often attracted to guys who are taller than me with good hair and nice eyes. Characteristics of a person that attract me to them further include confidence (without being cocky), a sense of humor, friendliness, kindness, and being outgoing. The most important factor that a guy must have in order for me to be attracted to him is the ability to make me laugh. Even if a guy does not have all of the characteristics of what I am physically attracted to, I am able to overlook it and still find the male attractive if he has a good personality and treats me well. (2992) 4. I think the first thing that everyone is attracted to has a lot to do with physical appearance at first because it is the first sensory input that we receive before coming into contact with that person. I have to say that what most attracted me to this person were his quirky smile, square jaw line, and wide back and shoulders. Aside from his physical appearance, I was attracted by his sense of humor, self-confidence, perseverance, humbleness, honest attitude, and dare I say crude language (cussing is a part of my own language). His personality was more important to what attracted me because it was beyond the surface. He eventually became by best friend and now boyfriend. 3066 4. When I was very attracted to a guy, especially at first it was due to purely physical appearance. But I didn’t like him as a person after I got to know him. For a long term attraction it usually has more to do with the guys personality, if we like the same things, behave in similar ways, and just like being around one another, then after all that his general appearance comes into play. I would say women’s emotions. Men have a hard time understanding why we take the little things to heart, why we say we are fine when we are not and why we can hold grudges so long. These are all things that derive from our emotions and most of the time we get upset because men disregard to easily something that we find meaningful or important. (5369) 4. The last time I was attracted to a male, some characteristics that attracted me were his humor, attractiveness, and confidence. For me, personality and humor takes precedence over attractiveness, but when I do not know a guy and see them for the first time, I do have to be somewhat physically attracted to them. (2501)

4. The characteristics that attracted me to them was their eyes, they were very light brown/green; they had a deep/kind of serious voice; they were tall, over 6 feet; somewhat mysterious and hard to figure out so that intrigued me; when we did talk they were kind of sarcastic and I personally find the ability to joke and be sarcastic extremely attractive, they know how to have a good time, I’ve seen them in party atmospheres and they were fun; they were self-confident; they were older than me, but not too much; but overall his attractive looks was the first impression I got and that attracted me to him. (6858)

4. The last time I was particularly attracted to someone was initially because I first found him physically attractive, but that was not enough. Sure there are many very attractive guys out there, but I am always not interested when they seem cocky, rude or unengaged. What made me attracted to this person was that he was friendly, had an interesting sense of humor and was very involved in class discussions. (0632)

4. On a physical level, I am attracted to men who are tall, muscular, and have dark hair and light colored eyes. Tattoos are also a plus. On an emotional level, I am attracted to men who are funny, ambitious, and also charming. It sounds like the typical prince charming, but that’s what I’m attracted to. I’m pretty tall, so I’ve always been attracted to men who are really tall as well. I also find muscles and athleticism to be very masculine, and I find masculinity very attractive. I also love tattoos because I feel like it shows than a man is passionate and confident enough to put something permanent on his bodies. (2307)

4. A person who I’ve found particularly attractive was both physically attractive to me as was his personality. His physical characteristics matched my exact type and so did his personality. He was a genuinely sweet guy who, even when he would upset me, never intended to make me upset or to intentionally be mean. He was extremely protective and attentive as well. (6991)

4. I am really attracted to a man who is confident, funny, intellectual, sensitive, unique, trustworthy, and adventure seeking. When it comes to looks, I am not consistent- but I like tall guys with long hair and facial hair who are musically inclined. The quality I was most attracted to was his ability to be extremely goofy at times but serious when the time is right. Also, small gestures never go unnoticed. (0572)

4) What in particular attracted me about this guy was his ability to be so charismatic. He was really confident and self-aware but at the same time he was really sensitive and able to understand my feelings and points of view. Just after an initial conversation I felt like we had so much in common and that we needed and wanted the same things. Furthermore he was really available to me but at the same time he wasn’t too pushy. It was as if he liked me but at the same time he wanted to push back and not go to far. This behavior just drove me crazy. (7500)

4. I think I’m most attracted to quiet confidence. I like it when I can tell that a man is confident without him outwardly telling me; otherwise it just seems like arrogance. Usually the quietly confident men are also the ones that are intelligent and witty, which are two huge things that I’m attracted to. The last time I was extremely attracted to someone, I was really drawn in by the playful back-and-forth banter we were able to engage in, which I think encapsulates being confident, smart and funny. He also had an air of mischief, which I thought was super really alluring. Physically, I like men that are tall and thin yet fit — really muscular guys don’t really do anything for me. And if he has brown hair, stubble and wears glasses, those are all pluses too. (9166)

4. My current boyfriend, I met on a trip somewhere. The first thing I noticed what that he was tall and handsome. As I got to know him though, I became even more attracted to him because he was incredibly sweet and sensitive. From the beginning he always asked how I am doing, and did not play games. Even if I did not respond to him for a few hours, he would respond to me right away if he was next to his phone. Since we were on a trip both of our families were also there, and he was more than happy to spend time with mine. He listened to me, and established a friendship with me, and did not try to push my limits (ie: try to do something physical very soon). In fact, he even asked me before he could kiss me the first time (over a month later). 6947

4.) There are several characteristics that I find most attractive about the opposite sex. First, I am really attracted to guys who are witty and have a good sense of humor. I think that these characteristics are most often seen in guys who have a certain confidence about themselves, which can also be an attractive trait. Overall, I tend to be attracted to decisive, intelligent guys who have a strong sense of self. (2387)

4. The last person I dated, became particularly attractive to me days after we had met. He asked me out on a nice date, which is rare to begin with nowadays so I knew he had a higher level of maturity and seriousness then most guys my age. He was attractive, but not a head-turner, which is important for me to feel attracted to someone. He was very confident but not egotistic, which was also a huge turn on. He was of particularly high social status, but I did not find that out for a few dates which I think played a slight but not major role in my attraction for him. He was extremely well-mannered, opened doors for me, presented me to anyone we spoke to, made sure I was always treated with utmost respect, etc. The way he treated me was very impressive and surpassed all of my normal standards, making him extremely attractive. He was from another country and his personality and stories were very different from anyone I had met before and my interest in him increased due to this. (8638)

There is a large combination of characteristics that make me attracted to someone of the opposite sex. I am attracted to men who are smart, but humble and who have a gentle presence. But at the same time I am attracted to men who are strong because it brings me a sense of physical comfort. In addition I am attracted to someone who has a good sense of humor and has a want to adventure and explore. I am attracted to people who travel, who climb, who explore.(0423)

4. I am most attracted to men that are sensitive, caring, emotionally-intelligent, and nurturing. I love when men are not afraid to be in tune with these things because it reflects that they are confident with themselves and aren’t worried about meeting social standards of manhood. I am also attracted to men that are intellectual, adventurous, ambitious, good listeners, take care of their health, have a good sense of humor and want to make changes in the world. (1252)

4. Something that attracted me to the guy I am talking to currently was the fact that he was funny. I think a good sense of humour is an incredibly attractive and important trait that all people should have regardless of sex. Along with humour comes a friendly, open personality which can really make a guy ten times more attractive than a guy that is too sensitive and gets butthurt easily. (8993) 4. I never fully felt romantically attracted to guys but there are some nice qualities that I like about guys that I find very attractive. I had a guy friend who I thought was down to earth, easy to talk to and came across as nonjudgmental. He didn’t care so much about how I look and he didn’t seem very two-faced. I feel that I can have a drama-free conversation with him (5702)

  1. 4.)The moment I became the most attracted to my current boyfriend was when he took me on our first date. He went out of his way to make the night special for me and expressed how he felt about me without trying to get into my pants. He is a true romantic, which is a characteristic in men I find extremely attractive. Physically, I am the most attracted to Men when they are tall and of a bigger stature. I like when they have bigger muscles and nice body definition. I am also attracted to Men who are of a particular ethnicity and have strong ties to their culture. It is exciting and attractive to be involved with somebody who has a different perspective on life due to their culture and participates in different celebrations and rituals.(1324)
  1. 4. I think I am really picky and skeptical when I see and talk to a physically attractive, seemingly witty and intelligent guy, so if his humor, good sense of self-care, sweet/friendliness, and intellectual and curious disposition lasts over a good amount of time, and don’t diminish as soon as we are consistently seeing each, than I tend to allow myself to become really attracted to a guy. Generally humor is an aspect I will always find attracted. I also love if the guy genuinely loves my humor as well; laughter in general is always enjoyable. (0531)

4. My last relationship was characterized by an instant attraction to his muscular physique and confidence in social situations but after a year of dating I found that our personalities were just not compatible long term and ended up causing a lot of discrepancies. After that I have found that over anything I look for humor and a general laid back disposition in the potential men around me. Not in so much that I’m only planning for future long term relationships, but in male friends and potential boyfriends alike, I find the quality of being able to joke about oneself and to not be offended easily as a highly redeeming trait. (6503)

4.The thing that attracted me most to my last boyfriend was his confidence. He had no problem approaching me in a non-creepy way and striking up a quick conversation. He asked for my number and said he wanted to take me on a date. I have been going out to bars for years, and that was the first time a man told me he wanted to take me on a date rather than just “chill” or “hangout” or “hookup”. The fact that he was confident enough to ask straight away to take me on a date was really cool. (2662)

I think confidence is what makes a man most attractive. It’s sexy when someone is so at home with himself, and it makes me feel as if I could be at home there too. Confidence draws me in because it makes me feel like there is so much more to learn about that person. It makes them seem much more interesting. Other qualities that are important are overlapping interests, intelligence, a sense of humor, and similar values to mine.

One time I was particularly attracted to this guy who always seemed really mysterious. Even though I knew him really well he always kept me really intrigued because I felt there was always something I didn’t know, but wanted to find out. The most important factor that attracted me to this person were his personality traits. (9232)

I was really attracted to his physical strength and the way he carried himself with a sort of quiet, mysterious confidence. Eventually, I became more and more attracted to how someone so big and strong could be so gentle and caring. I found that I was initially attracted to him based off his outward appearance but it was his personality that kept me interested in him. (9031).

I am attracted to men who are nice and easy to talk to. Of course, physical attractiveness is important as well, but I feel that if a guy is friendly, it automatically makes him more attractive. Another thing that is attractive is a sense of humor and outgoingness. This goes along with confidence as well. If a guy is confident enough to crack jokes and make you laugh, he becomes more attractive. A guy who is smart is also very attractive. However, he cannot be the type of guy who tries to show off how smart he is. (3651)

I like tall, toned but not buff, blonde guys who have tattoos and sort of hot babyish face. I like retired bad boys around the age of 26. I like them to be quiet around a lot of people but outgoing and funny around friends. I like them to be confident but definitely not cocky. And I don’t like them to hit on me. I like to pick them out and initiate the conversation. The most important factor is their psychical appearance, especially being tall and blonde. But what also matter is the energy they give off – something sort of unexplainable. Maybe I’m chasing after my ex-boyfriend because that pretty much sums him up. (1109)

4. Characteristics that attract me to men include but are not limited to; athleticism, humor, personality, manners, and tone of voice. Athletic men are always a plus for me because I am athletic and it is nice to have someone who you can go out and play ball with. Personality and humor are a major plus, I would not want a man who is serious each second of the day because then it would be pretty boring and nothing fun would come out of the relationship. As far as personality goes they have to be sweet, likeable, nonjudgmental, and all that other jazz. Manners is very important as well, rude men or men that talk down to others (hence the tone of voice) are really unattractive. Men need to treat and speak others like they would want others to do for them. 9295

The thing that most recently attracted me to a man was his sense of humor. He is always the center of attention, but not in an obnoxious way. He is the center of attention because he naturally just confident, funny, and outgoing. People tend to look up to these characteristics as it coincides with those of a leader. I was very attracted to him as well which of course helped. It also happened that we knew each other when we were little so it seemed like one of those crazy serendipitous moments. (1160)

When attracted to someone of the opposite sex, I find myself to be most drawn to broad shoulders, clear complexion, good teeth, pretty eyes, and a nice smile. I am also extremely attracted to a funny and witty sense of humor. I find myself most attracted to confident yet nerdy personalities. Confidence is key, but not too cocky. If I really reflect on the order to which my attention is brought to these characteristics, I feel that I am first drawn to a great sense of humor and then a man’s physical nature. (8077)

4. I find my current boyfriend incredibly attractive because of his personality. He is exceptionally outgoing, caring, genuine, and really works hard to make his life as successful as possible. We have known each other for six or seven years and he really has taken the time to get to know me, inside and out. We share many common goals, ambitions, hobbies, and attitudes in regards to appearance. Since I am 5’10”, it is also a huge bonus that he is taller than me! (0946)

4. His appearance is what caught my eye but his personality was what further attracted me to him. Friendly gestures made me aware that the attraction was mutual. (7437)

4) Initial attraction to most men usually begins with their physical features. I tend to look at height, appearance and the physical structures of their faces. Secondly, I look for their personalities, and how compatible their morals are with mine. This second aspect is what ultimately determines of I end up liking the guy or not. (3886)

4. I find myself attracted to men that have a good sense of humor and that are easy to talk to. When they’re open about who they are and their feelings, I definitely become more attracted. I truly believe that having an initial friendship is essential in a long-term relationship. When a person is simply attracted to another’s physical appearance there’s a high likelihood they won’t be compatible as a couple. A person’s personality traits, in my opinion, need to be the most attractive quality about the person because they determine the compatibly. (4610)

4. The first thing that attracted myself to my boyfriend is his physical appearance. When he approached me for the first time, I was immediately physically attracted to him. As time progressed and we began hanging out and going on dates, I not only was attracted to him physically, but I became even more attracted to his personality. His ability to joke around and have fun but also at times be serious and attentive made me fall in love with his personality. His strong relationships with his friends and family also were a factor that attracted myself to him. Although his physical appearance is what initially attracted myself to him, his overall attitude, perspective on life and drive is what made me entirely attracted to him.

4. My boyfriend is very charismatic. He is very charming and that is what initially attracted me to him. His kindness towards everyone he meets is something I find very attractive about him and is something I think is really important in a significant other. I think “a person who is nice to you but is not nice to the waiter is not a nice person” is a very good rule of thumb. Physical appearance is important too, of course. I like strong hands and forearms, thick eyebrows, brown hair, and a tall strong body without being creepily muscley. Now that I think about it, I would actually prefer someone a little round around the edges than a super skinny guy. (7663)

4. I was initially attracted to my boyfriend for his physical appearance, as well as his personality. He made me laugh, which I find attractive and he was charismatic and fun to be around. Over time however, I became more attracted to more emotional traits such as his kindness, compassion, honesty, openness, as well as his intelligence. The most important factor that drew me to him initially was our chemistry (8531)

4. There are many characteristics that constitute me being attracted to someone, but there are definitely qualities that stick out among the rest. Whenever I am attracted to a person of the opposite sex it usually starts by being attracted to their physical appearance because it is the first thing a person notices about someone else. Beyond this, however, I always find myself being attracted to people who are extremely outgoing and confident. Specifically, one thing that always draws me towards a person of the opposite sex is eye contact. I am attracted to a person who is able to keep strong eye contact and not act like they are distracted or focusing on something else. If a person is able to show me that they are extremely engaged in our conversation, that is an attractive quality to me. (8417)

When I met my boyfriend, I was immediately attracted to him. He’s good looking, but it wasn’t just his physical features that made me drawn to him. He was confident, but not cocky. He was athletic and played three different sports: track, football and rugby. He was easy to talk to and friendly so that everyone got along with him. I was always nervous around him, but he seemed comfortable cracking jokes and always seemed really invested in the conversation. Honestly, the most important traits to me have to do with personality, because one day if you are still with the same person and you’re old and retired with more wrinkles than a raisin, all you have left is their company. They are the person you will have to go through all your important life moments with, and who you will spend 90% of your time talking to. How is it possible to have a relationship with someone you can’t stand? Sure the other characteristics have a contributing factor, but they aren’t deal breakers. (2431)

The initial thing that makes me attracted to a new person is there physical appearance, including both their body, the way they carry themselves, and they way they present themselves (i.e. their clothes). If I meet a new guy who rejects me slightly or ignores, I feel more attracted to them, and see them as a new challenge to overcome (and get them to feel the same way about me). I am also more inclined to be attracted to a guy if he carries himself well, and seems self-confident, or if he has something I like (such as cool friends or a nice car). However, once I get to know someone other characteristics, such as personality traits, play more of a role in attraction, and outweigh physicality. (4669)

4. I think what attracted me the most to this guy was the way he treated other people. He was such a gentleman, always ready to give a hug when needed, and always ready to be there for a friend. I appreciated the way he treated his family and made time for his younger siblings, as well as how protective he was over the people he cared about. His demeanor and the way he cared for others was the main factor in my attraction. (8359)

4. The thing that attracted me to my current boyfriend was his shyness yet assertiveness. I have known him for many years before we got together and he was always shy which I liked about him yet always open with his feelings about me. He's always been loving and sweet to me. As far as physical traits that I like on him are the fact that he's tall, strong yet not hideously muscular. It just makes me see him as strong and protective over me when he holds me. I also love his bright smile and how his eyes light up when he smiles. (8436)

4. Surprisingly physical appearance isn’t the most important thing to me. The characteristics of someone that attracted me were extroversion, intelligence, and humor. We shared a lot of witty banter back and forth. He was just so nice to everyone, but he still slightly played hard to get. Social status doesn’t matter to me, as long as someone has drive to succeed in life. (7100)

4. In general, I think that friendly gestures toward me is what has attracted me to the males when they have approached me. Especially if their gestures were genuine or appeared genuine and there wasn’t any clear ulterior motive. I mostly base my attraction off of personality or charisma that I immediately notice rather than just looks. (6536)

I am particularly attracted to guys that can really make me laugh. Being very social is nice especially since I can be really shy sometimes and feed on that positive energy. A guy that who is really confident and stands up for you is a really big deal to me. It would definitely be a combination of self-confidence and personality traits that draw me to a person. Even if he isn’t physically attractive, those qualities help me to appreciate him more and I slowly start to find him more attractive. (2321)

  1. 4 There is one guy I work with that does absolutely nothing for me physically. He’s not my type at all, which is tall, muscular and athletic. This guy is not. He’s also super flirty to the point of being almost pervy. But for some reason I think he’s the cutest person and find myself inexplicably attracted to him. When I think about it, it must be his confidence that draws me in. He’s also just a super friendly and nice guy and has made me feel welcome since I first started working there. (0497)

4. A big part of my initial attraction to a guy is his physical appearance. Particularly, his eyes and smile. In addition, if the guy is dressed like he put an effort and smells great is a plus. It shows that he takes care of himself. I am attracted to athletes because they are often tall, fit, muscular and driven. However, I do believe that what keeps the attraction alive is his personality. Looks fade overtime, but his personality is what stays. I love when a guy is playful and sarcastic, throwing around clever, witty comments to my own comments. I am also attracted to guys who are intelligent and can carry on a conversation, where they actually talk and not just lecture at you to sound like a know it all. (0613)

4. Things that attract me to a person is personality, intelligence, humor and lastly physical appearance. I will not say that physical appearance is not a factor but it is not the most important. An ignorant, physically attractive person is only attractive until they open their mouths. (9164)

4. I tend to find men the most attractive when their personality is amazing. To me, personality greatly trumps looks any day. The perfect personality to me is a man with a great sense of humor but is also very loving and caring to any of my needs. He’s not afraid to be himself. An ideal partner of the opposite sex is someone who will do anything to put a smile on my face. Looks do not matter to me because without a good personality to back yourself up, you are just another pretty face. (5659)

4. I think physical appearance definitely comes into play regarding a general sexual attraction. I think that at first physical features are what draw people toward each other, but eventually I find myself more attracted to personality traits and self confidence. Physical appearance alone is usually not enough to maintain a relationship with someone. When men are well mannered, have a good personality, and have self confidence I find it very attractive but I think that being over confident can lead to cockiness which is usually unattractive to most women. (7008)

4.The men that I tend to be attracted to are often very kind and caring. I am really attracted to people who are considerate of other people and try and treat everyone around them with respect. That being said, I do also find a sense of humor attractive as well as a willingness to not take things too seriously. I also like men who are well cultured or well read or who are particularly talented in one particular way. One of my biggest crushes in high school was a fantastic pianist and I loved watching him in concerts play because I was attracted to his talent. (6617)

4. For me initial attraction comes from physical appearance, if I’m not physically attracted to them chances are I won’t let the other areas have a chance. I love tall men, so if they are about a foot taller than me my eyes are drawn to them (I’m 5ft 2in so anything 6ft +). Smile and eyes are next, once I get to talking next comes personality, they don’t have to be a certain type, I just have to have a connection. (7302)

4. Their confidence attracted me and their ability to talk to me openly as I am shy and need that initiation from the opposite sex as well as their sense of humor. Their friendly gestures towards me made me feel that they liked me and secure that they liked me, which attracted me the most. (5908) #4 I find confidence in both mentality and physicality as attractive because that means you have an insight into who they are and what they value most in their lives. Initially, it is looks, but for me it comes to friendliness, sociability, and proving they are genuine in their intentions and interest towards you. (2259)

4. I was attracted by the person’s sense of humor, show of kindness to others, and the fact that he engaged in conversation with me. I like people who have the same dry sense of humor that I do and whom I can joke around with. I also really value people who are compassionate for its own sake, exhibiting kindness to others even when they think no one is watching. Physical appearance is of secondary importance to me, although it is definitely a factor. (7413)

4. Some of the few physical characteristics that men possess which I am attracted to are: tallness, muscular (a fit man), eyes, broad shoulders, clear skin, and nice teeth. As far as personality traits, I am attracted to someone who shows that they are kind, genuine, and caring. Also, I am typically attracted to men who are the same ethnicity and social status as me. (3892)

I would argue that the thing that first attracts me to someone and grabs my attention is first and foremost their physical appearance. The characteristics of their appearance that I was drawn to was their height, body structure, and eyes. I am attracted to men that are tall, and have big broad shoulders, muscular arms, and a toned back. However, physical appearance is not the most important factor that attracts me to someone, because often times I have been initially attracted to someone but then upon meeting them and getting to know their personality I am completely turned off and see them in a different light. An attractive physical appearance does not guarantee an attractive personality. The characteristics that attract me to a man are his sense of humor and genuineness. I am very attracted to guys that can make me laugh, and isn’t afraid to just be himself or weird. Also I am attracted to a guy who is sweet and gives me attention in a way that seems genuine and not just as an act. (9994)

While physical attraction is important for me, I found myself completely in love with my ex-boyfriend not because of his physical appearance. Objectively, he wasn't what most girls would consider to be attractive. But what made me really develop a strong attraction to him was not only his self-confidence, but his attention to detail. I'm a simple woman and it's very easy to make me happy. But the one morning when he came into my classroom with my coffee exactly the way I like it without me explicitly telling him how I like it or that I even wanted any coffee showed me that he was genuinely interested in what I like. One time, he even took me out of my classroom early while I was sick, gave me medicine, and had me stay at his place until I got better. Let's not forget to take into account that I was throwing up all over his apartment. (3231)

At first, I was attracted to an ex-boyfriend simply because he was physically attractive. He was 6’2 and tan with straight white teeth and strong facial features. I liked him simply because I liked looking at him and he was great to show off. Second to his face, he was confident and had good taste in music. 4531

I am very attracted to a man when he has a good balance: he is both confident and humble, smart and willing to learn, athletic but not aggressive, and strong but also sensitive. The most important factor that attracted me to the guy that I was attracted to was how personal he was with me: it is very refreshing and nice when a man is the best that he can be with you. When men are wiling to try and make you happy, this is very attractive. (9140)

4. I’m attracted to males that are taller, and stronger than me. Being a pretty independent person, it makes me feel like if we were together, we would be a power couple and would compliment each other, and not solely depend on one another. I am also attracted to confidence and the way they treat other people, the way they talk to workers and bystanders says quite a lot about a person’s character. I take it as a sign that they are well mannered and grounded with themselves and that they are capable of having respect for strangers. Social status is a large trait I’m attracted to as well, it shows me that they do not need a significant other in their life to occupy their time, and that I am someone they enjoy having around but not needed because that is the same thinking for me. (9097)

  1. 5. Some of the strengths of men include their ability to make decisions faster, usually in the context of helping other people. I find women tend to overthink things or even cues on body language or verbal language in general. A weakness of theirs, however, is their lacking in empathy and sometimes even engagement on other people’s lives. This is definitely a weakness because a strong connection depends on these aspects (0531).

4) When I am particularly attracted to a man, it is usually because of his physical characteristics and personality traits. I am drawn to men who are taller than me with dark hair and handsome features. I also like it when they appear healthy and fit because they then carry themselves well, but obvious muscles can be a turn off because that implies arrogance and too much self-confidence. Regarding personality, I am drawn to a sense of humor and adventure. I will be more attracted to him if he is sarcastic and enjoys the outdoors. I admire humbleness, therefore a man would become less attractive if they talk about their societal status shortly after meeting. Once we started thinking about each other more seriously, however, societal status becomes a more attractive characteristic. Friendly gestures toward me wouldn’t make me more attracted to them because friendly gestures these days usually imply that they are only interested in you physically. (9634)

4. I remember approaching and talking to a guy from purely physical appearance. He was extremely tall, good looking, and had tattoos. He was just a good looking guy and I think that is what attracted me to him. However, there have been times where I found someone I thought was just a friend to be attractive as well. He’s not my type, and I am not physically attracted to him, but his personality is amazing. He is extremely funny and very quick witted. He listens to what you’re saying and really gives you his full attention when talking to him. So there are a lot of different things that make guys attractive to me, whether it be their face or their personality. (0018)

4) I was most attracted to his personality. He has a great sense of humor. But another thing that attracted me to him was his sincerness. He sincerely liked me and showed it everyday. He would do anything for me and tell me how much I mean to him directly and show it by actions. His gestures towards me were very sincere showed that he really cared about my thoughts, opinions and feelings which meant more than him being very physically attractive but the icing on the cake was he had very nice long lashes and green eyes which were the first two things that drew me in. I also like a guy who dresses well and smells good. Tall men, with big shoulders and great teeth are impressive. If he looks like he takes care of himself and his body in my opinion means he will be a good boy to his girl. (4605)

4.The last male I found myself attracted to was very physically masculine but also had a sense of humor and was quirky. This person also had soft facial features which made him seem approachable. Additionally, he was very friendly although we were acquaintances. He definitely portrayed confidence but was sparing with it, I never felt like he was being cocky. His sense of humor made it easier for us to connect on a different level because we were able to joke with one another. (2775)

#5. In your opinion, what are the strengths and weaknesses of the opposite sex?

  1. A strength of men is that they are problem solvers. A weakness of men is that they don’t share feelings or emotions very much (which leads to other weaknesses and problems). (7407)

5.I think boys have difficulty understanding some emotional situations especially when it comes to female’s emotions and emotional reactions. I think they have trouble connecting emotionally sometimes and letting their masculine guard down. Their strengths are their confidence and lack of insecurity about trivial matters. Because of this lack of insecurity they tend to be less dramatic about things that don’t really matter and therefore have less drama in their lives.

5. Strengths of men would be their ambition to succeed and their direct nature. Weakness of men would be the lack of initiation to communicate their wants, needs, thoughts, etc and commitment.(4012)

5. Strengths that men possess include actual physical strength, protectiveness, they are simple, and they are straightforward. Weaknesses that men include are self-control and they are not very emotional. (3892)

5. In contrast to girls who often think subjectively, men are often good at looking at things objectively, which is better for making prompt decisions without over-analyzing the details. Another strength men have is their ability to go with the flow and being up to try and experience new things. A weakness is their inability to understand girls’ emotions and not relate to why certain things they do upset us. They are also not very good at planning and making arrangements.(2955)

5. Strengths= their athleticism, ability to take things in as they are, domination to a certain extent. Weaknesses= their insensitivity and cluelessness in certain situations, they way that might feel the need to impress especially in their peer groups, the way they sometimes use women physically or are more likely to do so than men because they are generally less emotional (5908)

The strengths of men lie in their ability to make decisions based on logic. The weaknesses of men lie in their inability to see that while it is very important to be honest, it is also important to make sure that they don't come across as tactless. (3231)

5. The strengths of men are their physical strength, their persuasion, and their confidence. The weaknesses of men are their inability to cope with their emotions, their inability to see future consequences of their actions, and their inability to multi-task. (8237)

5. Many of men’s strengths are also their weaknesses. For example, the uncomplicated and laid back attitude of men can be seen as positive. They are less dramatic, easier to talk to and less dramatic than women. This is also a flaw. Men are simplistic. They do not notice the emotions or hints that women give them because they are too relaxed. Men are also very territorial. They are able to protect women and be a trusted confidant. Unfortunately, this protective instinct can turn into possessive aggression. Men have a difficult time controlling their temper and tend to get very jealous. (6259) 5. I believe that strengths of the male gender include their physical strength and power, confidence, and ability to not worry about trivial details. I am always amazed (and somewhat jealous) of males I see not worrying about something that is freaking me out. For example, in regards to school, I see many men not worrying about a test or project as much as I am. It would be nice to be able to have this mindset while still being productive and doing well on the project or test. Weaknesses of males include not being able to multi-task, being too driven by sex, aggressive behavior, and thinking that they are superior to women. While there are men who think of women as their equals, I still find many men holding the mindset that they are better than women in general. (2992)

5. Some strengths that men have are the general physical strength they have over women and the power that sometimes comes with it. Men also are a lot more laid back than women which I find is a strength because as a female, I over analyze everything and sometimes it becomes a huge set back in my life. I also find that men naturally give off a sense of self confidence and as long as it isn't over baring it usually would be a strength in their personality. Some weaknesses of males would be their general insensitivity. I think that the worst feeling is when you're telling a guy about a problem and they're unable to relate to how emotional you are so they don't understand and therefor don't care. (7008)

5. A mans strength is in his physical ability, ability to handle stressful situations, to think on his feet, and be direct in his goals. I find their weakness is in their sensitivity. Though the stereotype is that women are more sensitive I find men are very sensitive particularly with topics that pertain to them personally. An example would be in our last class, the girl said their dislikes to the class and there was a lot of arguing and specification needed, where as when the guys listed their dislikes of women, most of the girls agreed and admitted that they did some if not all of the things on the list. (5369) 5.Strengths: competitive edge, drive, muscles Weaknesses: insensitive, oblivious, simple-minded sometimes (0572)

5) Men are simple and drama free. They tend to create fewer complications in their life by getting over things more easily than women do. Their weakness is however their inability to express their emotions in order to maintain their sex role as man who don’t need the help of others and don’t cry or talk about their feelings the way women do. (7500)

5. Strengths: they are strong (emotionally and physically), they are handy when it comes to certain life obstacles like changing a tire or fixing something in a house, their ability to be protective Weaknesses: sometimes they don’t show enough emotion, sex-driven, immature (6858)

5. One of the strengths of the opposite sex is that males are able to take things more "Easy" they do not overanalyze things as much, and have a more laid back approach. They also have a good sense of direction, they are able to memorize maps. Also they are physically stronger (for the most part). They are able to lift things and are not seen as vulnerable as females are when walking alone at night. The weaknesses include not being able to express how they are feeling as much and having their ego get in the way of things sometimes. 6947

5. The strengths of males are their will to be ambitious and succeed, their will to be protective, and they are brutally honest. Weaknesses of males are how they lack commitment, they internalize a lot of their feelings, and they sometimes do not understand or know the line of their humor/jokes towards girls. (2501)

5.) I think that male strengths include their tendency to show confidence in front of others. Their physicality in general is also a strength in that they can perform certain physical tasks with greater ease than women. I think the male tendency to be blunt and honest can be both a strength and a weakness – a strength in that the other party knows exactly what they think and a weakness in that their bluntness can sometimes be hurtful. I think another weakness might be that males miss small details and subtleties that are important in interpreting the feelings of others, particularly significant others. (2387)

5. I think a strength of the opposite sex is that they are less high maintenance. women tend to stress over all of the little things and men are able to look past that and just focus on what they want. A weakness is that they don't always understand consequences, especially in regards to their actions with women. In that sense i think men can be selfish. (6991).

5. In my opinion, a strength of the men is their ability to not get emotionally involved in a situation. They are able to keep emotions and material things as two separate components and live life a lot happier for this reason. They are offended and distracted a lot less because of this. Men are also outwardly driven as opposed to internally driven, which makes them more efficient beings. They can procreate, work, get motivated, etc with a lot less involvement of emotions. A weakness men have is tied to the above, in that they are not good at investing emotions when it would be better to do so. If two women are pursuing the same man at the same time, a man will easily choose a more promiscuous, attractive woman as opposed to a virtuous woman who would do a lot more good for them. Their lack of emotional investment keeps them from self-betterment because they are prioritizing instant gratification. (8638)

5. I think that some of the strengths of the opposite sex are that they are naturally physically strong, are usually straight-forward thinkers, and are usually career driven and future oriented. I think some of their weaknesses are that they can try to be emotionally dry, closed-minded, and sometimes lazy. 3066

5. Men’s strengths are that they are simple and straightforward so often you can take what they say at face value and not doubt their sincerity. With men what you see is what you get and they often have little reason to hide what they think when asked. At the same time however men can be unemotional and bad at picking up on emotional and social cues. They can often fail at providing affirmation and nurturance in relationships and being sensitive to someone’s needs. (1252)

5. I think a strength of the opposite sex is that they are very naturally protective of people they care about, whether it be their moms or girlfriends. Something I think is a weakness is the need to have their ego stroked constantly, and the need to feel alpha in situations. (8993)

5. Some strengths many men have would be their friendliness, lack of judgement and willingness to forgive. Some weaknesses men may have include emotional cluelessness and a lack of empathy. (9166)

5. The strengths of guys is that they can be your protector and ward off offenders, they can be loyal especially if it is someone close to them. Guys don’t hold grudges and are able to conceal jealousy very easily.The weaknesses of the opposite sex is that they get overly attached to sex, breasts and pornography. They can be verbally or overly aggressive when they get irritated and have anger management problems. They are more internal and have a hard time showing their weaknesses (5702) In my opinion the strength of the opposite sex is that they are rational and they easily make decisions. This are black and white and straightforward. For this reason I feel that guys can be more productive as their emotions don’t get involved in their decision making. I think a weakness of the opposite sex in general is their inability to adapt a new perspective. I feel that men often times do not understand women because they can’t imagine what it is like to be in their shoes. I feel like this is a skill that is more common within women. It is harder for men to understand a woman’s experience in a situation and I think this leads to a lot of conflict and controversy. For example when a women is venting to a man about an upsetting situation and they want to receive comfort often times the man can not understand their experience of why they were upset in the first place. Since they can’t step into the shoes of the women they can’t properly comfort because they don’t have that innate understanding.(0423)

In my opinion, the biggest strength of a man is his rational ability. Men have the ability to set aside emotions that are no longer serving them for the better. I feel that women have more trouble doing this. A man’s biggest strength can also be his biggest weakness; the inability to adequately express emotions. (1324)

5. One of men’s greatest strengths is usually being able to get over arguments with others very quickly. While their arguments may be more heated and escalate more quickly than arguments between females, they usually resolve themselves in a timely manner or both men simply decide to get over it and not be friends, but not drag out the drama. A very apparent weakness however is that men have the tendency to speak first without giving much thought to whether their words will be misinterpreted or somehow hurtful and/or ignorant. This quality can also be seen as a carefree, adventurous attribute yet in social situations often proves more detrimental than beneficial, especially when conversing with women. (6503)

5. Their strengths are their physical build, their simplicity, and moving on from conflict quickly. Their weakness’ lie in their lack of connection with their emotions. Somehow men are conditioned to believe that showing any form of emotion is uncool, and undesirable. (2662)

A main weakness of males is the inability to express their emotions. I think that men think vulnerability is bad and don’t want to look weak in front of their partners, so they therefore don’t like to show their emotions. A main strength of males is their ability to protect. Because they are usually larger and stronger than their partners, they are looked at as the protectors. Another strength is their ability to easily brush things off. Another way of saying this is they don’t hold grudges. If a guy fights with his girlfriend he wont hold onto the argument, whereas a girl might be mad for a long time, or bring up the argument again at a later date. (9232)

I think some strengths are being assertive and spontaneous. Assertiveness is important because it helps to get things done. There is no beating around the bush, or trying not to hurt someone’s feelings. What needs to be said is said, and then everyone moves on to bigger and better things. To get creativity and break out of boredom, spontaneity is great. It helps shake up the routine and keep things interesting. I think men are also generally good at fixing things, which I view as a strength because it is nice to have someone around who can do things for themselves and be more independent. I think some of men’s weaknesses are being aggressive and inattentive. Once someone sees an aggressive side of a person, they will always be wary of them. Relationships will be strained, and it might be harder to cooperate or trust them. Being inattentive makes others feel like men don’t care about them. Even if it was just a slip up, forgetting someone’s name or birthday, let alone not attempting to comfort them, can feel like a lack of concern for them.

A huge strength of the opposite sex is how easily they can let little things go. Girls often dwell on the tiniest of issues and it leads to more problems and wasted time. The main weakness of men is their obsession over sex. Sex often clouds their judgment and can lead to trouble and heartbreak. (3651

5. I think men are stronger emotionally and have thicker skin than women. They are also more rational/logical in times of high stress. But I think men are too controlled by sex, which is a weakness. I also think that another weakness of men is their inability to empathize with women. I find men’s inability to plan ahead is both a strength and a weakness. I think it is a strength to be able to live in the present and enjoy life as it comes, but I think it is also a weakness because men tend to be less prepared than women. (2307)

5. Strengths & Weaknesses

5. The strengths of guys is that they can be your protector and ward off offenders, they can be loyal especially if it is someone close to them. Guys don’t hold grudges and are able to conceal jealousy very easily. The weaknesses of the opposite sex is that they get overly attached to sex, breasts and pornography. They can be verbally or overly aggressive when they get irritated and have anger management problems. They are more internal and have a hard time showing their weaknesses (5702).

The strengths of men: literally, they are usually much stronger than women. They are able to handle rejection better than women. They don’t’ resort to being passive aggressive—straight up.

Weaknesses: They can be easily manipulated by sex. Some have too much pride which can lead to fist fights, etc. Some unable to open up emotionally and can be afraid of commitment. (1109)

5. Strengths of men is that they are very charismatic and easy going, this really helps them when it comes to social skills. Women are automatically drawn to men whom possess these qualities and they also have the ability to influence other men and aspire them to be just as sociable. Another strength is men’s ability to be bluntly honest, although sometimes the truth might hurt it is better to have the truth be told than to be lied to. Men are not scared to tell others the reality of life and all the terrible things that might come with it.A weakness that men have is the inability to see things other than black and white. Men seem to think that situations can only go one of two ways, but that is not necessarily the case. They seem to have a difficult time thinking out of the box and seeing things from a different point of view. Sometimes it is as if that things to do not happen in the way that they want them to happen, then there will be no way at all. Another weakness is their inability to respond to and express emotions. It must be genetically ingrained in them that being completely unemotional is acceptable, but in reality it makes them harder for women to read and understand. 9295

The strengths of men include their ability to problem solve, forgive, and be light-hearted. I admire a man’s ability to forgive and forget so easily, as it is definitely not for me. A guy’s lower sense of empathy is also where I feel they get their light-heartedness from, as it means they have the ability to not think as seriously about a situation. I feel their weaknesses include their obsession with the female body and their lack of empathy. A woman is far more likely to fall in love with a man for his personality over his looks than a man is able to. A man is also more often influenced by his sex drives rather than his emotions, which is very frustrating to me. (1160)

Some male strengths are their masculinity and athleticism, easy-going nature, and their proclivity toward thinking of only one thing at a time. Some male weaknesses include their tempers, their sloppiness, their difficulty communicating with women, and their outward arrogance. (9031)

In my opinion some key strengths of the male gender are the willingness to serve women, self-sufficiency, confidence, physicality and literal strength. I also really admire how drama free men are. It seems that when conflict arises amongst men, they are able to either talk or fight it out and move on. Women almost always dwell on a situation and go through a period of avoidance before confronting an issue. Women then hold grudges, even when claiming to be “over the situation”. This is something that men seem to gracefully avoid, and I very much admire that. Some weaknesses that I observe in men are a lack of sensitivity, lack of emotional empathy, and emotional disconnect. (8077)

5. Some strengths of the opposite sex include their assertiveness, ability to rationalize situations, and their general carefree attitude. One of the biggest weaknesses with men would have to be their aggression. Men tend to go from calm to explosive very quickly, in these instances they even set aside their rational capabilities to try to fight for some sort of manhood or respect that they feel entitled to. (0946)

5. Strengths – easy to get along with; don’t typically hold a grudge Weaknesses –bad temper; always competing with others even over silly, insignificant things; sense of entitlement (7437)

5. I think a strength that men possess is that they are very rational and good problem solvers. They are quick to come up with a game plan and make decisions relatively easily. I think their weaknesses lie in being stubborn and standoffish when they think they are right. (0632)

5) Strength of males includes their abilities to let go of situations and, rather, embrace what is to come. Males don’t typically hold onto grudges, which cause their overall relationships with others to appear more authentic than girls. Males’ biggest weakness is their inability to be perceptive when it comes to other people. I feel as though they lack the ability to accurately detect others’ emotions. This could provide for a serious problem in a matter of relationships. If the male’s partner does not feel as if he is empathetic of their emotions, it may case a rift between the two, and could put a strain on the relationship. (3886)

5. A strength I see in a lot of men is their ability to sort out their priorities. Women can get carried away with one group of friends or a new significant other and men don’t seem to do that. So in that way I think men are better at balancing their lives and giving work, friends, family, and a significant other equal attention. They also are better at setting aside feelings until a more convenient time to deal with them. A weakness men have is being oblivious. Even if they do care, they don’t really make an effort to notice little things or to remember birthdays or parts of a conversation. (7663)

5. I believe men have a lot of strengths. They have a great ability to forgive others, more so than most females. I believe some are more willing to put themselves out there and be vulnerable. However, they also have some weaknesses, such as most are more influenced by their testosterone than logic. They’re extremely motivated by sex and some attempt to manipulate others to obtain it. (4610)

5. One of the greatest strength of males is their ability to set aside their emotions in their decision makings and even in everyday functioning. Men have the ability to detach from their emotions completely in order to focus on other things. Women have a harder time doing this. Women’s behaviors are often dictated by the emotions and have a harder time detaching from them. A major weakness of males is their lack of communication. Men do not value communication as much as females do and this often makes it hard for men and women to effectively communicate with each other at vital times.

5. Strengths of males include physical strength, relaxed dispositions, protectiveness, simple mindedness, spontaneity, ability to fix things, less dramatic, and more adaptable to change. Weaknesses of males include poor communication skills, less sensitive, selective hearing, messy, aggressive, not attentive, less empathetic, and don’t like asking for help. (8531)

The strengths of men are that they are in general confident, strong, and driven. The weaknesses of the opposite sex are that they are stubborn, rude, and immature. (9994)

One strength of a man is that they are protective, so that no matter where I am I feel safe. They have more self-confidence than women, which is refreshing when women are constantly complaining about their weight. One weakness is that boys have the need to impress others, so they act in cocky and immature manners. They are slow to mature, and put little thought into their physical appearance. They take significantly less showers than women. If you look at a woman’s room and a man’s room, you will be able to tell whose is whose. They have in incredible sex drive that often takes precedence over anything else. (2431)

I think a strength shared by most men is the ability to not be overly emotional. However I think the same thing can be a weakness for it is also in times when emotions are beneficial they tend internalize more (4669)

5. I think that in general, men are very good at being straight-forward when they talk and are much more willing to be assertive when necessary. Women are much more likely to tiptoe around certain subjects or allude to things without explicitly saying what's on their mind. That being said, although they are more straight-forward, men often fail at communicating about their emotions, disregarding such topics as unimportant or not worth explaining. That is definitely something women are better at, and this usually creates a decent amount of conflict. (8359)

5. The strengths of the opposite sex would have to be their idea that they have the power, however I think that is in fact their weakness because women always make the men soften even though they think it will never happen. (8436)

5. In my opinion, I think their strengths are exactly that, their ability and willingness to be considered as strong and protective species. I think their weakness also lies in assuming that this is all it takes to become a man which sometimes allows them to hide their emotions and put on affront they may be perceived as cockiness. (6536)

5. There are several strengths and weaknesses when it comes to both males and females. Some strengths that I think males have are being protective, being straightforward, and being decisive in emotional situations. Among the many strengths that they have, however, there are weaknesses as well. Some of these weaknesses are not being emotional, always feeling like they have to be right, and being aggressive in unnecessary situations. (8417)

5) The strengths of the opposite sex would be that guys aren’t as afraid to act to get what they want as girls. They are a bit more confident in themselves so if they see something that they want they will go after it. I think it has to do with they don’t have as big of a fear about what people may think about them. They will go outside and not care if their hair is messed up whereas a girl will make sure she looks perfect before letting anyone see her. I think a major weakness about guys is that they don’t express their emotions as much as women do. I’ve noticed that girls interpret silence as being the equivalent of not caring. But if guys opened up more and let girls see their sensitive side they wouldn’t put up as many walls. (2321)

  1. 5 Men’s strengths are obviously their physical strength and overall athletic abilities. They’re also seemingly better at fixing things like broken pipes, cars, anything electrical, etc. They are also better it seems, at asserting themselves in confrontational situations. For example, if I’m at a restaurant with my dad and we have bad service, he has no problem confronting the server and negotiating a discounted meal. If I’m with my mom, though, she will typically say nothing or just be slightly passive-aggressive to the server. This is just awkward and gets us no discount. Men’s weaknesses seem to come into play when it comes to communication skills, particularly when emotions are involved, general maturity, anger management, rational thinking and comforting distressed loved ones. (0497)

5. I think a lot of men’s qualities play the role of a double-edged sword. According to certain situations their strengths can become their weaknesses. For example, one of their strengths, in my opinion is that they have a rational mind, however this often backfires in situations where they are needed to be emotions and emphatetic. Another strength is the fact that they are driven and strive for success, however it does become a weakness when they solely focus on that. Weakness is stubbornness, they have a hard time budging. (0613)

5. Strength: Men do not get overwhelmed by the little details. Instead they will work around the problem and get tasks accomplished. Men are able to focus on the bigger pictures and see the light at the end of the tunnel. (9164)

Weakness: That being said men can become very one track minded and forget the burden they put on everyone else. They do not realize that their action affect others, which women are very sensitive about. Men can be insensitive in these situations and focus too much on the end goal instead of getting the task done well. (9164)

5. A strength that men have is their direct way of speaking their minds. With girls you sometimes have to guess what they are actually saying behind their words. Most men say exactly what is on their minds. This way it is easy for me to understand how they are feeling without all of the passive aggression and drama. Sadly what tends to go along with this trait is low communication. Since men don’t get wrapped up in the drama the way women do, they are not as aware of others feelings around them. This then leads to what women see as low communication of their feelings. As great as it is that men say exactly what is on their minds they also do not communicate these feelings enough, giving us a double-edged sword. (5659)

5. The strengths of the opposite sex are their goal oriented tendencies, but this can also be their biggest weakness. Being so driven is good because most men have goals of being very successful, which is completely understandable, in our society a man is expected to be well off and when he is very successful it is a sign that he is indeed more manly than other men. Where this can go very wrong is when men more often than women are willing to put a multitude of things and people aside for that success. Often they forget to think of how their actions or lack of presence will affect a situation or a relationship. They become too competitive and it is no longer about achieving their goals, but instead is about beating out other competitors. (0735)

5. A strength of the male gender is that they are true. They do not try to bounce around the subject, they say something for what it is. They also take initiative with women. If a guy likes a girl you usually know and he will make the first move. A weakness is that they don’t realize how much they hurt girls in certain situations. They may just brush off certain actions or situations and not think about how the girl feels. (7100)

5. The strengths of the men are that they aren’t easily brought down by the little things in life, such as petty fights with friends. They have less drama with people around them than women tend to have. The weaknesses of men are that they sometimes do not see the deeper meaning behind certain things such as actions or other behaviors. They have a harder time interpreting why people may be acting in a certain way. (6617)

5. For me the strengths of men have to be their ability to make me feel comfort in the crappiest situations. Their weakness is their lack of emotional awareness. They can’t sense when things are wrong like women can. Sometimes people don’t want to have a pity party but would like comfort; it’s good to just comfort someone without having to have them tell you directly what the problem is. (7302)

The biggest strength for men is physical body strength. Men are often stronger than women, and being strong comes in handy when you need to defend yourself or when you need to open a really tight jar. Their biggest weakness is their overwhelming sex drive because the desire for sex can sometimes cloud their judgment. 4531

In my opinion, males are good at looking at things as they are and then finding a solution for it, put less pressure on themselves to be liked by everyone, and finding pleasure in doing little things more. They are not as good at taking the time to pay attention and give their input into another person’s problems. (2259)

5. Men’s tendency to be straight foreword in their words and actions is a strength. This makes interactions more efficient and lessens the likelihood of misunderstandings. When men say what they are thinking without filtering it, it is a more accurate representation of their thoughts. Although this may get them in trouble at times, for instance appearing to be insensitive, it takes the ambiguity out of an interaction. Another strength is their loyalty to their friends. Men seem more likely to stand up for their friends when they are not there to defend themselves, whereas women would rather avoid conflict. Men’s stubbornness is their weakness. They always have to be right and like things to happen on their terms. It seems like they are less willing to engage in conversation to come to a compromise about things and more likely to do what they want even if no one else will do it with them. (7413)

5. Strengths that men possess include actual physical strength, protectiveness, they are simple, and they are straightforward. Weaknesses that men include are self-control and they are not very emotional. (3892)

5. Strengths would have to be protectiveness, males instinct to become the primary breadwinner of the family, Weaknesses are that they are usually less romantic than women. (9097)

5) In my opinion, some of the strengths of men are that they are straightforward, protective, confident and useful. Some of the weaknesses of men are that they are stubborn, narrow-minded, immature, and lack empathy. (9634)

5. I think that one of the main strengths a guy possesses is not over-doing something. For example, they don’t over analyze things (they don’t stress about the little things that may matter to a girl). Guys are loyal, most of the time. Another strength that a guy has is that they are protective. Some of the weaknesses that I think that guys have are being too emotionless and immature. Another weakness can be their ability to pick up on social cues. (0018)

5) In my opinion the strengths of being a male is that they have good spatial reasoning so they tend to be better at sports and also in packing a car or packing a closet, a house, they are good at moving things and making it fit. Also men are good for handy things because they are stronger and can do more intense things than a girl. Girls on the other hand are more nurturing and soft but still capable of some much. (4605)

5. Right off the bat, I definitely feel that men are unable to properly communicate because they assume that it makes them seem vulnerable to show emotion. Communicating over text is not the same as talking face-to-face because both parties are unable to see the facial expression or hear the tone of voice that accompany the message during a conversation. Also, men are incapable of seeing situations in the same capacity as women. I would assume that this is due to the fact that women are much more aware of their surroundings and are legitimately constantly thinking about something. I would say that 99 percent of the time, even when I am completely zoned out, I have something on my mind. It is very difficult for me to sit somewhere and clear my head, this is why I cannot meditate. (2775)

#6. Can you think of any instances in which you have personally been treated unfairly by the opposite sex? If so, give a brief description of what happened.

  1. 1. I was treated unfairly by the opposite sex when I was playing powder-puff football for the school. The guys from the football team were coaching our team, and the girls wanted to scrimmage against the guys for practice, but the guys insisted that it wouldn’t be fair because they were too good for us and we wouldn’t get very fair. I ended up scoring a touchdown on them.

In high school, my ex boyfriend cheated on me with one of my friends at the time. We had been together for 6 months and one night after hanging out all day, he called my friend over and they hooked up at his house. After finally confessing to me what happened, he then went on to date one of my other friends. It felt like a bunch of betrayals at once and ultimately the entire situation could have been avoided if he shared his unhappiness beforehand so we could have broke it off before seeing other people or talked it out and solved the problems. (He also didn’t need to be going after my friends … ) (7407)

6. A lot of college-aged guys tend to look as women as sexual objects and approach them with that intention, which is fine if both parties are looking for the same casual kind of thing. But I’ve had instances where guys have said very crude things to me in attempt to get me into bed, or in response to me rejecting their invitation to “see their room.”

6. I had a project that was particularly frustrating because the guy I was partnered with immediately thought that all of his ideas were better than mine. He presented a few ideas that I said arbitrarily were “good, ” but I mostly said that not to be discouraging. His ideas, however, had nothing to do with the prompt. When I pointed this out, he insisted that it didn’t matter because the ideas were so good. When I presented my ideas, he rejected them all, not even trying to spare my feelings. I was frustrated because I knew my ideas were worth pursuing. The rest of my energy was spent convincing him that we should come up with a brand new idea since he vetoed all of my ideas right off the bat. He thought that his writing was much better than mine, used me mostly as a secretary and essentially tried to make me “decorate” the project. (0632)

6. Ways I have felt treated unfairly by the opposite sex usually have to do with commitment and communication. An instance would be getting to know a guy for a while and perceiving that everything is going well until he either stops talking to me with no explanation or treats me differently suddenly. When a guy suddenly stops wanting to hang out or even talk, there is a great deal of unanswered questions. Such as “did I do something wrong?” so on and so forth. Additionally, if there is a sudden shift in dynamic when being together and there is a weird tension, I want to know what the guy is thinking and what is going on. I do not believe it is fair to be left hanging out on a limb with a thousand questions. (4012)

6. I went to an all-girls Catholic high school, so most of the boys I was friends with went to our “brother” school and everyone was pretty much involved in each other’s personal lives. When I broke up with my boyfriend during my second year, I got a lot of backlash from his friends and was blatantly called a “slut” and “bitch”, among other things. They basically treated me like I was a terrible person, which was really hard on my self-esteem. They all felt like they had to back up each other, so when relationships turned out badly, they treated the girl like the enemy.(2955)

I was raised by men. And as a result of that, I became a tomboy (or a woman with great interest in topics that are often associated with men). I grew up with my grandfather and uncles who were all well known college basketball coaches for the top university in the Philippines for basketball. So I know a lot about sports. I found that often times, guys discredited me and made remarks like, "you're a girl. what do you know about sports?" At a young age, I began writing post game analysis articles and got thousands of hits. But I was only allowed to do so because I submitted them under the name of a man. These same articles were submitted under my real name, but were initially rejected. (3231)

6. I distinctly remember in 8th grade the boy sitting next to me told me that a woman would never be president of the US because men were better leaders. As president of my 8th grade class I found this wholly offensive and said I felt sorry for him, his opinion meant nothing to me, and his mother should be ashamed of the way he thinks. He scoffed at what I said and tried to look cool in front of the people around us. The next day that boy left a teddy bear and chocolates on my desk as an apology. (8237)

  1. 6. I don’t recall a specific time where I was discriminated against because I am a woman, however, I have observed prejudices in a physical context, i.e. getting into a pick up basketball game at the park. Although I am not told anything or blatantly picked last, I definitely feel, in the beginning of the game, that the other men are extremely careful and usually don’t want to match up with me to play because they feel they need to go really easy in defending me, etc. (0531)

6. When I go out to a party or to a bar, I notice that I am treated very unfairly by the opposite sex sometimes. One particular situation occurred when I went to a bar in Santa Monica with some of my girl friends. At this bar, many of the guys pull you away from your friends when you are walking around because they act overly-confident and believe that it is a privilege to talk to them. I kept running into one particular guy that night and he kept stopping me to talk to me. I thought that he was creepy and I could tell that he was very drunk so I would always keep the conversation brief but polite, and then leave to go and find my friends again. Later in the night, I got cornered by the same guy. This time, the guy was very forward and kept talking how I should go to an after party at his place. I politely refused but he kept pushing and repeatedly tried to kiss me. I avoided the kisses and kept trying to leave but he would not let me go. After rejecting an inappropriate sexual advance, I forcefully left. This made the guy upset and his friends even came over to tell me to give their friend another chance. Being treated as an object and not as a person was not a good feeling for me. I strongly disliked how the guy used his physicality to avoid letting me leave and find my friends. I also thought that it was extremely inappropriate for the guy and his friends to think that they are entitled to my company just because they are males. (2992)

6. This has happened a few times, but if I ever rejected a guy from having sex, he never talks to me or wants anything to do with me. There was a chase, but once I said no, they were gone. And then eventually they have a girlfriend with someone else. (6858)

6. I spent time traveling through Middle East with a group of young men and women. The men were given later curfews, nicer housing, better food, and a laundry service. Women were expected to wait on the men and assist them with such tasks as cooking and cleaning. Men were allowed to wear whatever clothing they saw fit while women were meant to be covered head to toe regardless of the extreme heat. This situation is repeated to a lesser extent even in the United States. Women are still expected to do chores for men and men make more money, allowing them to have nicer things. Sons are given later curfews than their daughters and allowed to show as much skin as they would like. Although the degree to which men have better treatment varies, the theme is constant. (6259)

6. A I am a small person, this happens tome a lot as men assume that I cannot do things and make me feel weaker than them even in situations when I might not be just so that they can feel powerful and dominant. An example was at work when one of the guys asked me to open the dors for him when he was driving a cart. The doors were quite heavy but he then assumed I could not do it even though I could, and said never mind , you will not be able to, hopped off to open them himself. (5908) 6. Yes, many times, one of the most resent was when I went to Costa Rica for a school study abroad program specializing in environmental research and study. The professor in charge was wonderful but he always seemed to think that I (and most of the other girls) could not do anything even though I personally had worked in research before and had a good deal of experience. He would look at a group of people I was in and point to each person saying “Your groups will be good at this, you are good with cameras, you are good at writing, you are good at leading,” then he would get to me and say “and your just beautiful!” which as nice as that is, I was not on that trip to be a spokesmodel for research groups or something. He never seemed to look past my looks to my actual ability, always assuming that because I was a girl I was somehow delicate (even though I play ice hockey and throw javelin, go figure) and he seemed to see me as clueless. Through out that trip he always favored the boys for more physical (but fun!) activities and it frustrated the whole group seeing as there were 10 girls and only 5 boys. (5369) 6. I think almost every woman has been cat called, and to me, that is an example of being treated unfairly. I feel like men cat call as a way to objectify women. We aren’t an app that you rate in the iTunes store. We aren’t pets that obey all your commands. We are people and deserve to be treated like people. If a man wants to compliment a woman on her physical appearance, there’s a polite and appropriate way to do it. Cat calling is not one of them. (2307)

6.I hang out with a group of guys, and one of my girlfriends. The guys are all incredibly successful businessmen under 30. Last summer I realized that they don’t take a single thing my friend or I say seriously. They don’t listen to what we say about them or ourselves when it comes to school or life, and never pay attention to what we say when we try to contribute to their conversations, regardless of what the topic may be. It sucks because they consider us friends, but just not as equals to them. Our opinion is less valid. (2662)

6. There was never anything significant for me—really just gym class when I was younger. The boys never wanted to pick girls to be on their teams because they thought we weren’t as good at sports. (0572)

6) I’ve been treated unfairly by a man who insisted to just wanting to be a friend with me even if he was constantly playing with me and taking advantage of my strong attraction towards him. As a friend he should have pulled back instead of teasing me all the time with continuous phone calls and sweet messages. In addition he affirmed that as a man he didn’t have the strength to reject me, since he was physically attracted to me as a woman, and this was the reason why he wasn’t able to say no to me. (7500)

6. One time a male friend of mine told me that if I got breast implants I would be more attractive to the opposite sex. I thought that this was completely uncalled for and humiliating. I felt very judged especially by someone I considered a good friend. 6947

6.) Recently I had an unfortunate experience with the opposite sex while exercising. I was out for a run and a car full of guys honked and whistled at me while I ran down the road. I feel that it is unfair that I have to be constantly self-conscious and aware of my appearance because certain guys are always looking for an opportunity to check out a women’s body. By no means does this apply to all men, but I think it is unfair that females often have to endure this kind of catcalling on the streets (2387)

6. An instance in which I have personally been treated unfairly by men occurred when my group of friends planned a trip to Palm Springs. My immediate friend group consists of three girls and 6 guys, we are clearly outnumbered by the men. My best guy friend planned the trip and called and invited me and told me to invite my girl friends who he is not as close to. The trip was set and three days before our departure date, my guy friend called and rudely cancelled. He said his parents had given him a quota on the number of people who could stay at their rented home and he said he had to choose the boys, "of course." Ironically, I know that he is closer to me and my two girl friends then half of the boys going on the trip. I felt as though he should have prioritized our friendship over these gender expectations of boys before girls. (8638)

6. One instance where I felt I was treated unfairly by the opposite sex was when the other person was not making the effort to spend time together. He worked a lot during the evening but when he had time during the day, instead of trying to make time together, he would rather spend time alone. (6991)

6. There are several instances where I feel that men have treated me unfairly. In one particular situation, one guy acted as if he was extremely interested in me and would always talk to me and would invite me to hang out with him. It was going well for a while, until I realized that he acted that way with every other girl. It took me a while to realize that he acted that way only to keep me interested and basically to drag me along for whenever he wanted me around. I felt extremely used and treated poorly and also felt bad for all the other girls that were in the same situations as me. Men should not expect women to be at their beck and call. (8417)

6. I feel treated unfairly by the opposite sex when I am objectified, catcalled, or when men are persistent in pursuing me despite me telling them I am not interested. I feel that sometimes men underestimate my intelligence or strength simply because I am a woman. I find this to be disrespectful and don’t like be treated any less than a man’s equal. The one instance I feel I was most treated unfairly by a man was during a sexual experience (it was one of the first times I had sex with someone I wasn’t in a relationship with). He was completely uninterested in how I was feeling and was only focused on his own pleasure and experience. He said a few demeaning things and was upset when I decided to stop having sex with him because he hadn’t finished yet (even though he didn’t once consider if I had or not). He was completely entitled and disrespectful.(1252)

6. My ex boyfriend was Mormon so he believed in a lot of stereotypical gender roles. I felt like it was unfair (not to mention controlling) that he would tell me not to wear certain things just because I’m a girl. He also had an idea of what a woman “should do” like bake cookies all the time. (7663)

6. Just last weekend I was moving into my new apartment with my two roommates, one of which had her boyfriend helping in the process. When I was unpacking things for the kitchen, her boyfriend went off on me about my shirt “revealing too much” when it wasn’t that low at all. Having never met him before, I thought it was incredibly rude that he was calling me out for wearing a shirt that he didn’t approve of. He said that his mom “taught him to like classy women” and he felt “uncomfortable”. I immediately told him he was free to leave my apartment if he felt that way, but I was not going to dress according to his standards, especially because he was not my boyfriend and someone I had just met. I think this situation was completely unfair and he had no right to be an asshole to me without even knowing me for a day. (8993)

6. I can’t think of any reason where I was treated unfairly by the opposite sex. However, I hate how guys treat woman unfairly because they are emotionally vulnerable than they are or that woman get passed up for higher level positions so men can take them (5702)

6. I remember being treated unfairly by the opposite sex when I was in high school. Some men around campus thought it was in their right and okay to call me and my friends names when we walked by. I would consider it “cat-calling,” and it was derogative and sexist. These comments were unfairly thrown to us because my friends and I had not done anything to initiate the rude comments or given a chance to defend ourselves. 3066

6. I would say that I was treated pretty unfairly during first romantic relationship. I definitely played the subordinate role in the relationship, and my then-boyfriend often took advantage of being in the dominant role. He was comfortable being controlling and manipulative, and after I ended things with him, he behaved erratically (and continues to do so). In my opinion, the controlling, manipulative and possessive behavior likely stemmed from him feeling like he had established some sort of ownership over me during the course of the relationship. (9166)

In multiple instances Men have treated me unfairly because of my emotions. When I am particularly upset about a situation in which I feel I was treated wrong, I have been called ‘crazy’ for expressing my emotions in a rather passionate manner. I have been invalidated because what I feel is not significant or real to the opposite sex. If I feel a certain way about an experience- it is valid because it’s MY experience. Men tend to treat emotional situations with women as unreal because they are ‘just being emotional’.(1324)

6. In high school I was a coxswain on the men’s crew team at the rowing club near my school. Navigating the boat while the men are rowing is often relatable to driving a car, with many small and precise alterations to the course. I can remember often being called out more severely than the other male coxswains for my navigation skills because of my supposed female inability to drive and/or steer. (6503)

6. I have been treated unfairly by being cheated on. I had to find out by a friend because my ex would not tell me what he had done because men have a hard time admitting when they are wrong. Also, my ex-boyfriend had a terrible temper and would scream. I was much littler than him so I would become very scared when he got so angry so fast. I felt like I had no control over the situation. (9336)

6. When I was younger my father used to treat me unfairly in comparison to my brother whose only 1 year older than me. My curfew was at an earlier time, I always received phone calls informing me to come home because it was late, while my brother was allowed to be out later. Once of my guy cousins once treated me unfairly when I wanted to help him connect a surround sound system, he instead told me to go help my aunt cook. (6553)

Often times I feel that my intelligence is undermined by the opposite sex. Rather than worrying about what I have to say they are worried about how I look and wanting to look at me. I have the experience of men just telling me to “shut up” as if my voice does not matter. I think sometimes men are intimated by my intelligence and they like to belittle it. In particular as a yoga teacher men almost automatically think of me in a sexual manner when I tell them I teach yoga. When I begin to talk with them about theory and philosophy I feel they are often times shocked at my knowledge, but they don’t care.(0423)

Unfortunately, on more than one occasion, I would talk to a guy for a while, hook up with him, and then never hear from him again. Cliché, I know. But it is very unfair the way that guys can act like they are interested in you, and then right when they get what they want, they pretend you do not exist.(3651)

I had a boyfriend who expected me to cook for him, even though he never cooked for me. I also did all the grocery shopping for our meals together alone. He would also ask me to do laundry, and the dishes, and a lot of other chores. I felt taken for granted, as well as taken advantage of. It was as if I was filling the “mother” spot in his life, even though was not supposed to be my job.

The last time I felt I was treated unfairly by a man was when I was shopping for cars. The salesman spoke to me as if I had no knowledge of cars, which was far from true, and even told me that the car I was interested in was too “manly” for me, suggesting instead that I look at one of the more feminine cars. (9031)

I live with my boyfriend and he always thinks that because I’m a woman I’ll do the cleaning. He isn’t a dick about it, but because I don’t like living in a messy environment I constantly go around cleaning up after him and if I ask him to clean something, what he considers clean isn’t what I consider clean, so I find myself cleaning it again. We don’t fight much, but when we do its usually because I feel like a maid and I get sick of it and mad. (9232)

Luckily, not particularly.

I mean guys might befriend me not because they actually want to be my friend, but because they want sex. But I don’t know if that counts. Many times I do not distinguish whether guys are doing things for ME, or if they are do things simply because I am a girl. I’d like to think they do it for me. (1109)

6, An instance where a man treated me unfairly because I am a woman is when talking about directions. Men think they know everything and think they always know how to get to places, but most of the time they may be just as lost as women are or sometimes even more. It is a bit frustrating when you try to get a male directions and he doubts the directions the entire time and feels the need to figure out how to get to places all by himself. Although this may be something really small it is irritating that they always need to be “macho” and can never be wrong about anything, even simple things like directions. 9295

I can think back to the days of being excluded from being picked for teams in elementary school because I was a girl. It didn’t matter then if the boys thought I was cute or not, I was simply a girl. Surely I couldn’t hit a ball because of this. I was never really a star athlete and maybe it’s because I wasn’t aggressive enough like the boys were. (1160)

We live in a patriarchal society, men expect women to serve them and be domestically talented. I often have friends over to my apartment for dinner parities and just to hang out. Though it may not be blatant, men almost always expect to be served more than women do. Men wait for you to get them something to drink, while women get acquainted to the kitchen find where glasses are and serve themselves. At the end of the meal, men often avoid taking the steps to clean up the table, wash dishes, and clean the kitchen. Though if enough time passes, men will conveniently “offer to do the dishes”, that gesture almost always seems to come after a pause as if they are waiting to see if the women of the social setting are willing to take care of those domestic tasks. All in all, men just seem to avoid domestic duties as much as possible. (8077)

6. A particular situation in which I have been treated unfairly occurred in high school with a guy that I was dating. When I started high school, all the jokes about women being in the kitchen and making men sandwiches were really becoming popular. In what I mistook for a joking manner, he began to call me “woman” in our classes together and most of the time that we were around anyone else. It got to the point that when a person said, “woman” I actually turned and looked to see if he was there. Eventually, he broke up with me because I refused to make him a sandwich. It took me a long time to get over this experience, I had never experienced total sexism until that point in my life. (0946)

6. Whenever I go out with any males the individuals helping us tend to defer to the male for the decisions. For example, if I choose a movie people will tend to look at the male I am with to gage whether he accepts my decision or not. Although this is true whether the person helping us is female or male, it tends to occur more often when the individual is a male. (7437)

6) The most vivid memories I have of being treated unfairly by the opposite sex dealt with cases of athletics. In Physical Education classes during high school, when we played co-ed sports, it seemed that males on my team were reluctant to engage with me on the field or court. I danced in high school, and that was how most people identified with me, so it seemed as if the males, knowing this information, did not value me as an athlete. (3886)

6. There have been my instances where I felt discriminated against and treated unfairly as a female. As a young girl I enjoyed playing outside and getting dirty. On a family vacation I was outside with my male cousins playing some violent fighting game when my uncle approached me and suggested that I go inside and play with my dolls; that these types of games are not suited for a girl. (4610)

6. The first thing that comes to mind of when I have been treated unfairly by a male is when I was judged by my emotions. When I become sensitive or emotional I have been viewed as irrational and over dramatic. At the time in which I displayed such emotions, I believed that I was not being irrational or dramatic and my male counterpart did and did not take what I was saying into account. I believe this to be unfair for although I cannot control my emotions as well as a male, I do not believe that is a good enough reason to not take my opinions and feelings seriously.

6. Several instances in which i was treated unfairly by a male include situations in which a double standard was present. Girls are judged much more harshly for their sexual behaviors than males and are often judged as sluts while males are praised for their sexual behaviors. (8531)

I’m sure I could think of an instance in which I was treated unfairly by a boy, like when all the boys were picked first for sports teams or another like that, but I’d rather tell a story that better resonated with me. My parents worked in the same building, and were on a work volleyball team. They were playing a game one day, and they were losing by one point with just a little time left. My dad made a sexist comment saying that they should put in all the men because they were obviously better at sports. My mom punched him in the face, and they’ve been married for 22 years now. She taught me that no matter what, being a girl doesn’t inhibit you from anything and to never let them take advantage of you for that. (2431)

When I go to get my car fix they usually charge me more than they would charge my dad if me brought in my car. (4669)

6. When I was younger, I PE was always a nightmare because the boys hated to have to include girls in sports. Until my teacher made new rules that required them to pass to us or include us in the activity, the boys would do everything they could to ignore us. Even after they were forced to let us play, if one girl made a bad play or dropped a ball, all of a sudden every boy was complaining that "all girls" were ruining the game and shouldn't be playing sports with them. (8359)

6. An instance where I have been treated unfairly by the opposite sex would be my ex-boyfriend's insane jealousy. It was unfair towards me because we were together for almost four years and not once did I give him even the slightest notion that I may have been unfaithful. I was loyal and never even talked to another guy. My ex insisted that he trusted me, but not the guys that would try to talk to me. To this I would tell him that if he indeed did trust me, he would not need to care about the guys trying to talk to me. I found this extremely immature and hurtful that after so long he still felt insecure of other guys and it seemed to me that he did not know me as well as I would have hoped after so long. (8436)

6. I can not think of any instance where I personally felt that I had been treated unfairly by the opposite sex. The only situation I can think of is elementary school playground scenarios in which boys claimed that us girls were not allowed to play with them during recess.(6536)

6) I can think of a lot of instances where I was mistreated by guys. The example that comes to mind first would be when they have verbally been mean. I have gone on dates with guys only to find out later that instead of telling his friends he was going out on a date, he told them he had a booty call and was just coming over to use me for sexual favors. Guys have also turned situations around so that blame will not fall on them. I recently broke up with my boyfriend and instead of owning up to what he had done wrong he listed everything that was wrong with me and told me I would be forever alone because was so bitter. (2321)

  1. 6 I was dumped in a really messed up way by an ex boyfriend. He broke up with me without a warning at a party basically in front of all of our friends, and his reasoning was that he just couldn’t see me as more than a friend. The frustrating thing was that, when he was asking me to be his girlfriend 2 months earlier, I specifically asked him if the whole friendship we’d already had was going to be a problem in any romantic relationship we could have. He’d said no, but then broken up with me for that exact reason. (0497)

6. I have never had an experience where i have been treated unfairly by the opposite sex. However, I have watched my sister’s turmoil with her ex boyfriend. During the year I was very ill, my sister started dating a boy from her grade. While I would get treatment, they would constantly talk, text and go out. After I finished treatment, on a family vacation, my sister found out that this guy was hooking up with his ex girlfriend for the past year. It was mind-boggling that he would take advantage of her in such a vulnerable time in her life.(0613)

6. I feel unfairly treated when I get cat-called. I have had experiences especially at night clubs or other public arenas to be yelled at to come over. I had one stranger forcefully pull me closer and whisper “Don’t embarrass me in front on my friends”. I’m sorry you feel the need to impress your friends. (9164)

6. An instance when a guy treated me unfairly was last semester when I was together with a guy, Chris, and after being together for two and a half months, he ended it on very bizarre terms. He continuously told me how great I was and how much he liked me, but wanted to focus on work and his career. I fully respected and understood where he was coming from, and I’m an understandable person, so I was okay with ending things, but about a week later, I had been told he was already with someone else. I like to pick and choose my battles, and this was one that I didn’t want to confront, but he had treated me pretty unfairly by using false excuses to break up with me.(2501).

6. Back in high school I was interested in getting into a relationship with a guy. He was a super outgoing and nice guy but people warned me that he has a dark side. Trying to be a good person, I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Eventually we officially became boyfriend and girlfriend and all seemed to be going great. About a month after we started dating I got extremely sick. I went to the doctor and found out that I had a horrible case of mono. I am very conscious about not sharing drinks or food with anyone. How could this have happened? Naturally, I called by boyfriend at the time to tell him the news. He laughed when I told him and I asked why. He said nothing but I knew there was something off. After about a month and a half I was finally able to see friends and go back to school part time. As soon as I got back to school all of my friends were telling me that my boyfriend was telling people that he knowingly gave me mono, which he had only 4 months before. When I confronted him about it he denied ever intentionally doing that. To this day I still do not know for sure if he willingly gave mono to me but he was aware that he was still contagious. This is one of worst things a man has done to me. (5659)

6. I think a common mistake that guys make is when they lie to a girl they are in a relationship with, or lie to a girl in general. A lot of times men think that they have to lie about what they're doing or who they're with in order to not upset their partner. This is completely wrong and girls will always be more mad if a guy lies to them and they find out later. I think a dishonest relationship is unfair and being truthful will always lead to far better outcomes in a relationship than lying will. I personally tell the truth as often as possible so I take lying fairly seriously because most of the time, guys pick things to lie about that they don't need to. (7008)

6. I have been cat called time after time when I am just walking down the street. It doesn’t directly affect me; it’s just uncalled for. I don’t see what men get out of it. (7100)

6. I was only 8 and I loved football, but I was never allowed to go to the games with my dad and my other cousins. I was always told it was because I was too young, but a few months after asking to go my dad had invited his friend’s son, my best friend. We were the exact same age, but then I realized it is because I wasn’t a boy that my dad and cousins assumed I would not enjoy the game and instead they thought I would need to be entertained, becoming an overall disturbance to them. For my best friend the game was a right of passage, but for me I was kept from it because I was a girl, I wasn’t suppose to like sports. (0735)

6. When I was younger my older brother and his friends would always treat me unfairly because I was a girl. Whenever I wanted to hang out with them they would always tell me that girls were not allowed to hang out with them and for this reason, when I was a little girl I would often say that I wanted to be a boy because then I could play with my brother, who I looked up to a lot, and the rest of his friends. (6617)

6. I guess one instance I would say I was treated unfairly, or just women in general is the double standard that it’s okay for men to be promiscuous but not women. I understand that acting a certain way can get a person in trouble but why is it understandable for one sex and not the other? I don’t really want to get into detail of the situation but I’m sure you understand what I’m talking about. (7302)

My father comes from a traditional Mexican background so often times he scolds me when I break out of how he thinks a woman should act and treats my brother different from how he treats me. If I burp out loud he will tell me to stop acting like a dude, but if he or my brother do the same, there is nothing wrong with their behavior. Likewise, when my brother was my age, he was allowed to stay out as late as he wanted to or bring girls into his room without a problem. My father is less lenient with me because, as he says, unlike my brother, I can get pregnant. 4531

#6 I have never really felt personally victimized by a man because I believe they always see me as an equal. Hopefully because I show this to be true through who I am. (2259)

6. When I was in elementary school, a group of boys teased me about my age in relation to my gender. They said that when girls turn nine, they are really old, but when boys turn nine, they are still young. Although this particular statement is not especially insulting, it was hurtful and embarrassing because the group of boys ganged up on me, the only girl present. Even though what the boys said does not really make sense, it was still made on the basis of gender. (7413)

One particular instance in which I have been treated unfairly by the opposite sex was the breakup I recently went through with my ex boyfriend. I had gone on a girls weekend getaway with some friends, and prior to leaving I was very sick but decided to go anyways because I felt bad missing my friends birthday. The night before I left my boyfriend came over and brought me soup and comforted me while I was sick. After I had left for Vegas the following day things began to get weird between us. He wasn’t being very responsive, which at first was fine because I was with my friends, however it started to worry and annoy me. I texted him and called him several times, but still no response. I ended up getting more sick that night and didn’t go out with my friends and spent the night in bed with a fever and throwing up. I tried getting in contact with him, yet he still did not respond. Five days had passed before he finally responded to me with a breakup text message. I was completely devastated, confused, angry, and had a whole rush of emotions. He blamed the entire break up—making false accusations of things I had done and telling me I was too immature and not stable. I tried everything I could to have him meet me to speak in person to clarify these accusations and resolve the situation however he completely shut me out and threw me to the side. A month passed, and he texted me saying he missed me. We chatted for about 10 minutes until yet again he went MIA and didn’t speak to me. A week later I found out the real reason for him breaking up with me was due to another girl he had met and had been cheating on me with. I was livid knowing that the breakup was due to his indiscretions, not my own, and that he had made me out to look like a bad person when in reality it was him. Typically, like most men, he came crawling back to me asking for forgiveness and telling me he messed up and loves me, but my walls were up and I refused to let him back into my life. He started to text me and call me incessantly, blowing up my phone, getting angry, then sad, and acting completely crazy. In the end, as of this week, he decided to move back to the east coast blaming it on me and saying he can’t stay here anymore because I won’t be with him—clearly his way of trying to manipulate me or make me feel guilty yet again. (9994)

6. I was at an Italian restaurant one time with my boyfriend and the waiter treated me unfairly. It was obvious that he was sexist. He only talked to my boyfriend and had a conversation with him. The waiter completely ignored me and did not acknowledge anything I had to say when I tried to join in on the conversation. After leaving the restaurant, my boyfriend even realized how sexist the waiter was. (3892)

6. I have encountered situations that I have felt like I put in 75% effort and they put forth 25%, whether it be communication, thoughtfulness, etc. Lets say we went out to dinner and I bought dinner last week and he wanted to split the check this time. (9097)

6. I have found that generally I’ve been treated the most unfairly within my industry as a professional. Women seem to have to prove themselves more than men, whereas men are accepted until they prove themselves to be less than satisfactory. I also think it’s unfair that men are viewed as more funny than women. (3816)

6) Men have treated me unfairly when they prioritize their needs and ignore what I may be feeling. For example, a guy I was dating didn’t want to label our relationship because he wasn’t ready. His previous relationship was dysfunctional therefore I was very patient with him, but he didn’t even consider how that made me feel like I wasn’t good enough. (9634)

6. I don’t think that I’ve ever been directly mistreated, or treated unfairly by a guy. I feel like maybe a few of the guys I was talking to didn’t really take the relationship seriously(?) But they weren’t ever serious relationships, so I didn’t feel as if I was treated unfairly. (0018)

6) I think one time I have been treated unfairly by the opposite sex was when I was with my grandfather and he said I could not drive because ladies do not know how to drive. Only men know how to drive. I found that offensive because I do not believe that woman are not capable. Woman are very capable and I personally think we are better drivers than men. Guys like to show off and impress which results in dangerous driving. (4605)

6. In a particular instance I was seeing this one guy, whom I was interested in. I had assumed he was just as interested in me, however, the relationship we had was very casual. After the excitement of the first few months had gone by we spoke less and less with each other. There was a time when I had asked him to hang out and he did not respond. Then one day he deleted me off of snapchat. It was very strange to me because it was an unexpected reaction since we had not spoken in awhile. This is what our generation refers to as being “ghosted”. Meaning that the person you were talking to you suddenly drops all means of connection with you. He later told me that he was talking someone else and that I could no longer text him. (2775)

#7. Can you think of any instances in which you have been treated particularly well by the opposite sex, simply because of your (or their) gender? If so, give a brief description of what happened.

  1. My current boyfriend has treated me especially well. Because of his protectiveness, he has been a great support system during my parents divorce and any other issues I’ve had to endure. I believe men can be really good rocks when they have to. (7407)

7. Instances that I feel that I am treated particularly well are when I am in a room of mainly guys and I receive a great deal of attention. This may be narcissistic of me, but if guys are interested in my life and in what I have to say I enjoy it. Obviously there is a line between attention and conversation, and unwanted harassment. (4012)

7. At LMU specifically I rarely have to open a door for myself, because if a guy is near the door he will open it for me, which is very kind and courteous. Also at bars I have been given free drinks by bouncers or bartenders or have not had to wait in line like my male counterparts. The same occurs with parties off campus. Guys in less affiliated with the people throwing the party will have to wait to get in if they get in at all, while girls are usually able to walk right in.

7. I have encountered some instances when guys open doors for me; buy me dinner, more chivalrous things because they feel like they are supposed to do so. (9097)

7. Girls are given much more attention when it comes to social situations, especially those that involve alcohol. I have been in several situations where guys have treated me nicely by getting me a drink or making another guy get up so I could sit down. This happens a lot at parties or bars, typically where it is custom to treat women favorably.(2955)

7. When I was moving into my dorm, guys offered to hold my bags and bring them up the stairs because they looked heavy. I really appreciated the help. (0632)

7. I have definitely been treated particularly well by men just because I am a woman. When going on dates, the majority of the time, the guys that have taken me out have always bought my meal or movie ticket, etc. I would argue that this is special treatment just because I am a girl because if I invited a guy out for dinner, I don’t think he would expect me to pay for the meal, but if a guy asks a girl out he most often treats her because she is a lady. Also, often times I find myself getting special treatment such as being let into clubs/bars/parties for free and even getting to skip the line entirely and walk right in. In addition, I am not sure if this entirely accurate or just a misconception but I have had guy friends tell me multiple times that the only reason I have gotten away with tickets from police officers is because I am female. It sometimes seems that being female is like the get away free card when dealing with men. (9994)

My ex-boyfriend believed that women and men were to adhere to very stringent guidelines for their own gender. I was treated particularly well in that every time I was going to drive anywhere, he would always make sure to check in with me to make sure that I got there safe. Every single time. He would always say, "if a woman does not feel safe and protected with her man, then he is not a man." (3231)

7. I can think of one million instances where men have treated me well for the sole fact that I am a woman. I love having doors opened for me, getting into clubs free, having men buy you drinks or give you compliments (while sometimes creepy can also be very charming if done right). I have also noticed that when walking with men they usually (maybe subconsciously) will move themselves to walk closer to the street on a sidewalk to protect me. (8237)

7. Men buy me things because I am a woman. I expect free drinks at a bar based on my gender alone. I expect men to hold a door open for me for this same reason. I expect flowers from the men I am dating and for him to pay for the date but it is likely I will never return the favor. Women also treat me well because of my gender alone, in very specific circumstances. This is only done when a “team” of women is a benefit rather than a hindrance. For example when there are very few women present and the men in the room are unattractive, the women are able to team up to deflect their unwanted attention. (6259)

  1. 7. There are a lot of instances in which I have been treated well by men because I am a woman, particularly in a social context setting, i.e. parties, concerts, gatherings, etc. One example from 3 weeks ago was when I was in Las Vegas. My girl friends and I were admitted into all the clubs we went to for free simply because we were young women. One instance in particular was interesting because we had arrived late to one club and there were a couple of guys next to us waiting to get into the same club and while my friends and I were instantly let in, the men who also arrived at the same time as us were deferred to a place where they had to pay (0531).

7. I am constantly treated very well by my boyfriend. He always does whatever he can for me and genuinely cares about my well-being. For example, if I am not feeling well or am sad or unhappy, he will drive over to my house or call me (when it is impossible for him to come over) and make me feel better. I know that he wants me to be happy because he will do all that he can to achieve this. An instance when I have been treated particularly well by the opposite sex because of my own gender is at grocery stores or public places when males will hold the door open for me or the bag boy will ask if I need any assistance to my car. I have never seen a bag boy ask a fellow man if he needs help getting his bags to his car so I can only assume that I am receiving this offer because I am a woman. (2992)

7. Any instance where a guy buys me a drink. You rarely see a girl buy a guy a drink, it’s always the other way around. They usually buy girls drinks because they are cute, and hopefully by that gesture the girl will give the guy something positive in return. (6858)

7. I can think of tons of instances where I am treated well simply because I am a young woman. Dates where the guy pays for everything, men in bars/restaurants who bring over drinks or bottles of wine, or even men who open doors for women. I think a lot of this is something that boys are raised with, that whole chivalry thing. (2662)

7. I can’t think of a particular event but in general men at formal events and parties treat me very nicely. They usually hold the door for me; pull out my chair, just general polite behavior. (5369) 7. Any date where he paid for everything, opening car doors, complimenting my appearance, introducing me to his friends, subtle public affection. (0572)

7) In almost every occasion men have offered to bring me home after a night out. This happened with boyfriends, friends, but also acquaintances or people I just met that night. They offered a ride or even to simply walk me home. This behavior was due to the fact that as a woman they were scared something dangerous could have happened to me on my way home if I were alone. (7500)

7. Almost any time I go to a bar, a man offers to buy me a drink; and almost anytime I want to go to a club, I get in for free and get to cut the line. I think being a woman allows you a certain power over men: the power of sex. Guys will do pretty much anything to get a girl to have sex with them. (2307)

7. I have a particular group of guy friends who are extremely protective over me. Especially when we are all out together, they make sure no guy is bugging me, they always pay for me, and make sure that I’m getting home safe. These are all platonic friendships but because I’m a girl, they are particularly protecting and caring of my well being (6991)

7. As a girl, it is nice to have free drinks bought for me in bars. (5908)

7. This one time, I was having bad menstrual cramps. My boyfriend felt bad for me so he went to the store and got me tons of chocolate. He laid in bed with me and offered to get me anything I needed from the store, or even make me whatever I want. He stayed with me even though I did not ask him to. He obviously did not know what I was going through. I feel like men get scared when they hear a woman is on their period. 6947

7.) I had a recent experience when a guy intentionally helped me out just because of my gender. I was moving out of my apartment and a guy whom lived nearby offered to help me several times. I thanked him for the offer, but told him I was okay doing it on my own. Later on, I walked out of my apartment to throw my trash out and the same guy spotted me and grabbed the trash bag out of my hand to throw it away for me. While I appreciate the gesture, I am sure that a male would not have been so persistent to assist another male with those sorts of tasks. It seemed like the guy intended for it to be a sort of chivalrous act. (2387)

7. Whenever I go out around town I get treated particularly well by men of the opposite sex. At bars, they offer to buy me drinks the second I do not have one in sight. They make sure I do not pay for anything if we are going to a different bar. Guys, on the other hand, have to pay for everything beginning to night including entree fees. The differential gender treatment is undoubtedly a corporate matter, men buy drinks thinking they will get lucky with girls, and clubs and bars know that they will have plenty of business regardless of high and unfair charges because men really want to try and woo women and will subject to the differential treatment. (8638)

7. I think that sometimes I receive preferential treatment (discounts, faster service, special exceptions) from males because I am a fairly attractive woman. I actually don’t like that attractive people receive preferential treatment even if I do benefit from it. I think it is unfair especially since physical appearance is something someone is born which and not necessarily something someone can change very much. Also because I am a woman I am less threatening and “suspicious” and so I have again received preferential treatment for example when employees let me use the employee only bathroom or when I am not patted down at concerts/clubs while men are. Also at some parties women get in free and men have to pay. Again, just because I benefit from this doesn’t mean I agree with it. I believe it objectifies women and again I prefer equal treatment, not worse or preferential. (1252)

7. I can think of many reasons where I was treated well by the opposite sex though I can’t recall a specific event. Guys would hold open the door for me, they would give me compliments that would make me feel good. When I go to restaurants or any other nice place, the male waiters always seem more friendly than female waitresses. They would use terms such as “madam” or “miss” (5702).

  1. 7.) In one instance, I was treated particularly well by a police officer of the opposite sex. I got pulled over for running a red light and a male police officer pulled me over. I was having an extremely bad day and completely broke down in tears. He didn’t know what to do so he just told me to clean myself up and be more careful driving. If a male was in the same situation I don’t think he would have drove away without a ticket.(1324)

I have always been treated very well by men in the workplace. At my last job the men were very protective of me. Many of them also went out of their way to do things for me without me asking, such as lifting heavy objects or taking out the trash. (9031)

7. In general, I feel that I have been treated very well by the opposite sex. One instance where men showed true chivalry was when I dropped a bunch of papers I was carrying on campus during the rush of changing between classes and more then one man helped me gather all of my belongings instead of being selfish and ignoring that the situation even happened. Another time I was treated extremely well by the opposite sex was when I was moving out of my apartment all on my own and one of my neighbors graciously offered his time to help me move my belongings. These are just two examples in the recent past of how well men have treated me, however, men should also be acknowledged for opening doors for me and protecting me in necessary situations whether I know the man or not. (8417)

7. I can’t think of one particular instance that stands out to me, but I have noticed that male friends of mine often offer to walk me to my destination if I’m heading somewhere at night. It’s really nice that some men are conscious of the fear some women may have of walking alone after dark, and that they are willing to go out of their way to offer some sort of comfort or protection. (9166)

This isn’t a time I was treated “particularly” well but its definitely only because I’m a girl. When I go out to the bars, guys will offer to buy my drinks. I know they aren’t doing it out of the kindness of their hearts, but rather that they think it will help them get laid. Looking around, lots of girls get their drinks bought for them, but no guys are buying other guys drinks. (9232)

My best friend is a guy. And though he does have characteristics that all men have, he treats me differently. He is always there for me when I need someone to talk to and always checks up on men when he knows I am having a rough time. He knows exactly what to say to cheer me up. Since we are best friends, sex is taken out of the equation. It makes things less complicated and he actually treats well. (3651)

7. I’ve been on some very nice dates where men have treated me very well. In general, many of these things involve gifts, favors and compliments. The notion of chivalry. (3816)

7) Personally I do not have really much of an experience of being treated badly by the opposite sex. I pretty much think that most men understand that men and woman are equal and that men do not have power. I feel like the new generation is more open and educated and see that woman are very capable are smart. However, some men still have the old mentality that they are greater than girls and they superior towards them. (4605)

7. One of the most obvious social situations in which myself and other females tend to be treated far better than men is the general attitude toward females in alcoholic settings, whether it be at a club or simply a party. A lot of women I know particularly prize this social phenomenon, yet hypocritically dislike being more apparently treated as an object or valued for their looks at other times. The balance between being wanted for sexual attraction and for inner qualities is indeed confusing. (6503)

7. On multiple occasions I have had a guy offer to hold my books for me or open a door for me. I think this is because guys have been taught to do those little things for women as gestures of respect over time. (8993)

7. I have been treated very well by the opposite sex. Men have been very caring, loving, protective, and supportive. A man took me out to a nice dinner and concert to get to know me before he owed me anything because we were not in a relationship. (9336)

7. I don’t like to let it happen and don’t’ abuse it because it makes me feel uncomfortable

Guys have treated me especially nicely and offered to do things for me. I don’t think that they would have done these things for me if I wasn’t a women. Besides that, I wouldn’t be okay with a guy doing anything for me because of the fact that I am a girl. I don’t want to feel like I owe them anything. Plus, I haven’t been around many gentlemen. (1109)

In particular I think about often times men buy things for me like food, drinks, movie tickets etc. Whether the man is my boyfriend or just a friend I often times get free things solely because I am a women. I often think about this when I go out to bars and men buy me drinks. A part of me likes it because it is a free thing but a part of me does not as it sometimes feels like they are trying to buy me in a way. While when a guy offers to buy me food or a drink I usually accept as I see it as an act of kindness with good intentions, a part of me wonders about the morality of all of this and whether or not I should actually accept such offers.(0423)

Quiet often at both LMU and my workplace, men hold doors open for women. It is a small gesture, but it actually means a lot. It shows that they noticed you and care that you are following them in or out. A lot of the time, guys will even hold the door open for me if I am not immediately behind them. They have to wait, and it can get awkward, but I always appreciate it because they are taking that extra step to be polite. I don’t see men do it for other guys nearly as much. Once, I was walking out of a building, and a guy was on the other side of the door. He stepped in first and cut me off, and I wrote it off as an oblivious, inconsiderate gesture. But once he noticed I was there and what he had done, he stepped back outside, and held the door open for me to walk through. It was an amazingly kind experience.

7. Although it does not happen often, some men still open doors or women or allow them to go ahead of them in a line. Most men do not hold the door open for other men, but sometimes when they see a women walking towards a door or about to enter the same door that they are, they take the initiative to open the door. 9295

7. I feel like I’ve been treated “well” by the opposite sex because of my gender every time a man offers the statement, “Ladies first.” I feel like this statement has been internalized as the gentlemen thing to say and it is a polite statement that men use a lot. This has to do with small gestures like holding the door open and letting the female go first. 3066 I can’t think of any shocking instances in which a guy came to save me with his cavalier attitude. I can however think of small instances that still mean a lot to me though in which I was treated well because I am a woman. I’m never expected to lift anything super heavy when I am at my church every week. Each time that we are all setting up, whether it’s a scrawny guy or not, someone will always come to help me carry things which I really appreciate. I don’t find it demeaning at all. (1160)

Now that I have turned 21 I find it extremely entertaining to see how much more men reach out to women in bar settings. In other social settings (restaurants, shopping centers, social gatherings without alcohol) a man might find a woman attractive, but never approach her. At a bar, that inhibition is completely eliminated. Men automatically are more prone to approaching women at bars, flattering them, and buying them drinks. This gesture is also witnessed much more frequently toward women than men. You rarely see women going up to men and offering to buy them drinks for the night. (8077)

7. I have been treated very well by the opposite sex. In general, when I go out, I tend to go with a large group of guys who are incredibly protective of me. Just the other day, a male friend of mine got out of the car to help me at a gas station because a homeless repeatedly approached me and made me feel uncomfortable. (0946)

7. At work my male manager gives the male employees harder cleaning tasks where they must move heavy equipment around while the females are given easier cleaning tasks that don’t involve as much manual labor. (7437)

7) I think the best I have been treated by someone of the opposite sex happened during a date. Because I am a woman, it is socially acceptable for the guy to take the lead on the outing. Because of this, I had a meal paid for, had doors opened for me, and was generally treated with kind regard. Also, on the male’s side, he was very presentable. I was complimented multiple times. Overall, when males take me on dates, they present themselves in a way that you see all of their good qualities and none of their bad on one night. (3886)

7. There have been a number of instances where I was treated particularly well by the opposite sex because I’m a female. Last year, when I was moving out of my apartment and there were a number of males that offered to assist me. These people I had never talked to, yet they were gracious and helpful. I believe if I were a male it would have been less likely that those men would have offered assistance. (4610)

7. A particular time I can recall being treated very well by the opposite sex is when my boyfriend took me out on our first date. We were not an exclusive couple at the time, but he treated me with such respect as if we were. He picked me up from my apartment, promptly on time. He held every door open for me and paid the bill for dinner. At the end of the night he simply dropped me back off at my apartment with no expectations for any thing further to happen. His respectful manner made me feel safe and appreciated.

7. I can think of so many examples of this. Especially in bars, men buy women drinks and women don’t have to pay a cover charge. In Europe this summer a lot of men would get up from their seats on the metro to let me sit down. Also, men that I’m friends with at work who still have lion dollars are more likely to let a girl buy food than another guy coworker. In expensive stores (like fixing a phone at the apple store or something) I would like to have a male worker help me rather than a female because they’re usually more lenient. (7663)

7. In general I have been treated very well by the opposite sex. My boyfriend is always incredibly polite and respectful and my guy friends have always looked out for me as well. In some aspects males have been more loyal to me than females. (8531)

Because of my gender, it’s easy to get cheaper or free admission to events which men don’t. They will open doors for me and hold elevators so I won’t have to wait. In general, men treat women more kindly than men treat men. It is instilled in men that it’s their job to go out of their way to treat women well. (2431)

If I go to a club and there is a male bouncer I never have to wait in line, but if I am with a male friend we have to wait in line and he usually have to pay a cover (4669)

7. I have an amazing group of guy friends and they are always very caring and protective of me. When I walk back to my apartment after hanging out with them, they insist on accompanying me. If I get hurt (emotionally or physically), they rush to help in any way they can. While I know they would be amazing friends even if I were a guy, I know that some of the things they do and the way they treat me is partially due to my gender. (8359)

7. I think moments were I have been treated particularly well by the opposite sex because of my gender would be generally on date nights. It is expected for the guy to take the girl out on a date and give her flowers and plan out the evening. I think this is a moment where guys get to spoil their girlfriends and it does not always happen the other way around. (8436)

7. The instances where I have been treated particularly well by the opposite sex is at parties, usually fraternity parties. My experience with nightlife whether it be frat parties or clubs, etc. is that the ideal is to want and allow all women to attend while boys have to pay a fee or are turned away if they aren’t a member of the specific group hosting the party. (6536)

7) There is one time where I got really sick from drinking some bad alcohol and I knew my friend absolutely hated taking care of drunk people but he insisted on taking care of me. The entire night he never left my side and was very caring. He went well out of his way to make sure I was comfortable and got home safe because I was a drunk girl and he did not want anyone to take advantage of me. He has never done that for his guy friends. I guess he sees them as being tough and able to handle themselves. But just because I am a girl, he thought I needed to be watched and protected. (2321)

  1. 7 Tonight, I had to run to the gym just under 2 miles away from my house, because my car got blocked in my driveway and my roommate had left with the keys. There was a workout class I wanted to go to so I literally sprinted as fast as I could to get there in time. After the class, I was explaining to a guy at the gym my whole situation, and he offered to drive me home. I’m not sure if it was because I am a girl and he didn’t want me running back home in the dark, or if he was just trying to be nice, but it was a really nice thing to do and I appreciated not having to run back in pitch black darkness. (0497)

7. I have been treated well by the opposite sex on many occasions. But the latest experience I remember was at Disneyland this past summer with one of my guy friends. I recently had surgery on my hip and have a hard time standing up for a long time before I get sore. During the entire day, Johnny made sure I was not limping, or I was not tired. He put his arm through my arm and made me use him as a crutch. He even held my hand while I got out of rides, just so I do not trip or fall. He paid for our lunch and made sure to give me his sweater when I started getting cold watching the fireworks. It made me feel amazing and hopeful, that there really are great people in this world! (0613)

7. My best guy friend in high school went out to eat together all the time. One time we went to our favorite burrito place where you order first, pay, and then sit down. He knew my order and without me knowing ordered it with his and bought my meal. I wasn’t paying attention at the time, so I was surprised when I got to the front of the line and the cashier told me my order was already in progress! I don’t believe this was a nice gender because he paid for me. In fact, I enjoy being able to pay for myself. It was the fact that he knew my favorite order and thought it was nice that he simply surprised me when I got to the front of the line. (7100)

7. When getting into a care and there are three male passengers and myself, often the boys will let me sit in the front so I don’t have to squish in the back because they assume I would be uncomfortable being surrounded by two boys. And I do appreciate that. (9164)

7. An instance where I was treated well by a male was when my good friend Steven, who I also work with, surprised me with a coffee one morning at work. Random acts of kindness like this really stick out to me, and when I asked him why he got me a coffee, he replied, “just because”. (2501)

7. The first day I moved into the dorms freshman year at LMU, I was able to meet all of the girls and guys who lived on my floor. Lots of people on the floor loved to sing and play guitar. In a conversation with these people I said that my favorite song at the time was “Superman” by Joe Brooks. Eventually the conversation died down and everyone went to bed. The next day I went over to one of the guy’s rooms that were really nice. To my surprise I walked into him paying my favorite song on the guitar. I was so surprised because it is not a very well known song and he had learned it overnight. He told me that he wanted to learn that song so he could hear me sing. This was extremely thoughtful and kind for him to do. Now I know that he did it because he liked me and he wanted to show me that he cares. Exactly a year from that day we started dating and now we have been dating for a year and a half. It is weird to think that simply because I was a female that he found attractive that he did something so sweet that has completely changed my life for the better. (5659)

7. A common instance where women are treated well because of their gender specifically is when getting into a bar or a club. This situation happens regularly where females are let into a crowded bar or club before males so that they will occupy more of the venue, because more girls are wanted rather than more guys. (7008)

7. My ex boyfriend was always one to open the door for me, pull my chair out, all the other typical actions required by a “gentleman”, but being around his parents they often remind him that he is the man and I am the woman and he has to treat me very nicely because I am gentle and need to be cared for. This was upsetting because I was not a feeble or dependent person and had assumed we had all left such notions with past generations. I began opening my own doors, pulling my own chairs out, etc. and he did not mind very much, he still tried to beat me to the door and other kind gestures, but the first time his parents saw me open my own door they were so upset. They did not understand why I was doing this, and more importantly why he was allowing me to do this for myself. They were such kind gestures, but it was odd that it was based solely off my gender and his gender expectations. (0735)

7. Women, in general, have a much easier time getting into clubs or other parties and often in bars women have an easier time getting free drinks from men. I have gotten into several clubs on the basis of my gender alone, which is interesting when you really think about it. (6617)

7. At my old job I worked with mostly males, at the most I had 4 other female coworkers. Our job was a blue-collar type of job, hard, dirty labor. Most of the time the supervisors would give the females the easier jobs and the more physical and draining jobs went to the males. We would all get paid the same and work the same amount of hours but the work was divided differently, less was expected from the females. I guess in a way this was down grading the female’s ability but it was in our favor since the job was a lot easier. (7302)

Sometimes I receive larger food portions simply because I am a woman and the men helping me think I am attractive. There is a small deli near my home where most of the people working there are men. Whenever I order a sandwich, the men will pack it with meat, cheese, lettuce, etc. and make an amazing, overstuffed sandwich for me. My father went to order a sandwich from them and they made a mediocre one. I later found out that they did this because they thought I was pretty. 4531

#7 I feel like a lot of things that people could imagine as being treated with more attention because they are a women, like maybe having the car door opened for them or having their shopping bags carried, would to me only really appear to be respectfulness and proper. I do not find anything undignifying or degrading about that. (2259)

7. When I went to formal in high school, my date paid for dinner, gave me his coat when I was cold, and opened doors for me throughout the night. These actions were likely on account of the schemas of how men and women should act on a date or dance. My date was especially courteous due to both his gender and my gender. (7413)

7. Instances in which I am treated particularly well is when men open the door for me and tone things down in competitive settings since I am a female. (3892)

7. Because I am a female, whenever I go out on a date, everything is paid for, and I never touch a door handle, and I usually make the decisions as to what I want to do or how long to stay, etc. (2418)

7) The majority of instances in which I have been treated particularly well by men simply because of my gender involve the party scene. Girls are let into college parties and most bars and clubs for free and don’t have to wait in the lines as long as men do. We also don’t have to pay for our own drinks because men will usually offer to buy them. (9634)

7. I feel like going out on the weekends, girls get treated better specifically because we are girls. Girls get in for free and often get free drinks. For example, when my friends and I were in Vegas, we had a harder time getting into the clubs because there were six girls and five boys. However, later when we split up, we (the girls) were able to get in just fine, and didn’t encounter any issues. Also, I feel like girls are treated better when going on dates; most of the time, the guy will be super chivalrous, opening doors and paying for meals. However, these are things that are expected by our society of them. My family tends to treat my boy cousin better. I am not sure if this is because he is a boy (his gender) or just because he is the only boy out of 7 girl cousins. They see him as the token boy and is adored by all the aunts. (0018)

7. There have been many instances where guys have held a door open for me. I consider this act to be a gender norm. It is a societal expectation for men to be chivalrous towards women. I have held many doors open for guys and I have definitely been in situations where guys have not held the door open for me. This is one of the more popular incidents women are able to say that they were treated differently simply because of their gender. (2775)

#8. Describe an instance, or instances, when you have been rejected by someone of the opposite sex to whom you were attracted. How did they reject you? Was their behavior inconsiderate, rude or insensitive? How did it make you feel? How might they have done it in a more considerate way?

  1. The times I’ve been rejected by men, have nearly always been the same - they just flat out ignore me. I think for men that is their code to women that they are rejecting you. It comes across pretty rude and insensitive and could really be handled better. (7407)

8. I’ve been rejected by someone because I tend to be very guarded and it takes awhile for me to feel comfortable someone and trust someone, and some people aren’t patient enough to understand that and get to know me, usually because we’re looking for different things. They just reject you by stop talking to you, and avoiding hanging out or moving on to someone else, but never really just out right saying how they feel. This makes it worse because you’re kind of left wondering what happened and left unsure of the other person’s feelings

8. One time a guy was texting me for a while and he sent a text message inferring that he wanted to have sex. I didn’t want to have sex with him and that made him send a few angry texts back. I thought this was a hostile response. It made me feel like he didn’t actually like me but was just wanting to use me. Maybe if he was disappointed, he could have not responded. (0632)

8. I told this guy I liked him, but he said he just wanted to be friends. I don’t think it was inconsiderate, I think it was honest. I’ve never really had guys rudely reject me. (9097)

8. Many instances in which I have been rejected usually end up in the man distancing himself. Either they stop talking to me or there is just a feeling I have when we are together. Mainly, there are many questions that are left unanswered. Their behavior is insensitive usually and I do not think these guys understand that. When rejected in such a way I feel mostly insecure in who I am as a person. My self-confidence drops and I wonder why I was not good enough for an explanation. How the situation could have been handled in a more considerate way would be a face-to-face conversation on how the guy feels and what he is thinking. All I want to know is that he has thought his decision through and there is more of an explanation of “it’s college”, and “it’s not me it’s you”. Please elaborate on what you mean. A phrase does not give me enough explanation.(4012)

8. I was dating a guy for a few months, and then one day out of the blue he said he was not interested anymore and basically walked out as if we barely knew each other. I was confused because I did not really see it coming and his reasons for ending things seemed sort of artificial. I was mostly really hurt by the fact that he has not said one word to me since and ignores me any time I see him. He could definitely have handled it better and at least owes me the decency of acknowledging me in public.(2955)

I was rejected by a man that I had been dating for several months. I thought it was going very well. He even brought me over to meet his parents and siblings. One day, he just stopped speaking to me. There was no explanation. I found that cutting me off so abruptly was very rude. He ultimately gave me an excuse and said, "I have really strong feelings for you. But I have a lot going on in my life right now. I don't think this is a good idea." I later found out that he was going through severe depression. But I would have liked it if he just told me sooner, instead of cutting me off. I went through severe depression previously, so I would have been very understanding. (3231)

8. Years ago I was interested in a boy who I also thought was interested in me. He seemed flirty, we kissed occasionally, and we were pretty close. I also knew that he was somewhat of a “player” and thought that maybe I would be able to get him to settle with a girlfriend. Well, after months of him rarely texting me back, telling me he liked me and then treating me like I didn’t exist, I started to get the picture. I thought that because he and I had this history we would eventually date but then I would hear stories of his weekend escapades and feel hurt even though I knew we weren’t really together. It wasn’t until I met my current boyfriend and saw the way a boy who likes you really should and will treat you did I realize that the old boy was never worth the time anyways. He was insensitive, he lied, and he often told me things that I wanted to hear but would never act on them. His family loved me and I felt some connection but he wasn’t interested in taking any important steps towards a relationship. He made me feel wanted and confused, he made me excited but also sad. He always gave me hope when he knew he didn’t want anything serious and I think by stringing me along he was very inconsiderate. It would have been better but would also hurt a lot if he had been upfront and honest. (8237)

  1. 8. I have endured the slings and arrows of rejection from someone I was attracted to, twice, by the same guy, and it was devastating. I’m typically neither very emotionally expressive when it comes to talking problems out or explaining myself, nor when I’m listening to someone explain or express themselves, so when I was rejected I didn’t show any overt devastation, tears, or clear sadness for the matter. As far as my opinion receiving the information, I was quite surprised on how unemotional and direct it was. I felt like he didn’t really care about how his words would affect me and so it made the aftermath of coping and moving on very difficult. I did feel it was very inconsiderate of him, and a bit cold-hearted of him to treat someone so carelessly (0531).

8. My first boyfriend in high school rejected me at the end of our relationship by acting very immaturely and ceasing all communication with me for long amounts of time. When I was finally able to get a hold of him to talk to him about what happened, he would make rude comments about how I wasn't very interesting and he wasn't into the relationship anymore. This behavior was incredibly inconsiderate, rude, and insensitive and made me feel worthless and not wanted or attractive. He could have rejected me in a more considerate way by taking the time to talk to me about his feelings and how he did not want to be in the relationship anymore. Even though I may have still felt worthless, not wanted, and unattractive, it would have been easier for me to get over him and move on if we would have been able to talk about what went wrong. (2992)

8. I remember an instance when I was rejected by this guy I was attracted to and he came off very rude and entitled. He almost scoffed at me, as if he was way better than me and made me feel like I was completely out of my league by even approaching him. This made me feel humiliated and also very angry because I find it incredibly rude when people are pompous and have an elated ego. I think he could have kindly told me he’s not interested or I would have even been fine with him making up a fib such as saying he has a girlfriend. However, the expression on his face said it all, and his rude demeanor was a complete turn off and made me feel very stupid for even trying. (9994)

8. He was actually my best friend as well as someone I was interested in, but he got a new girlfriend because I didn’t like him quick enough and his new girlfriend did not want him talking to me or be close to me so he basically told me that we couldn’t be close anymore and we haven’t talked since. We were best friends for 2 years. His behavior was definitely inconsiderate because he didn’t even feel bad for leaving. He told me it had to be done without any remorse or even thinking about how it could affect me. He just listened to his girlfriend without trying to work something out to make us both happy. It made me feel like our 2 year friendship and his feelings for me were never that real or honest. The fact that he was so willing to get up and leave hurt. It could have been more considerate if he maybe felt more bad or put in the effort to at least talk to his girlfriend to work things out. (6858)

8. I have never been open enough to really experienced rejection from men who I have been attracted to, however there was one time when I was going to tell a guy Liked him and he told me right before that he liked my sister. I did feel rejected even though it was not direct or rude. Even though he was clueless and not rude at all, I was still hurt by the situation. (5908)

One guy and I showed interest in each other for a while. We flirted and after a while we eventually we went on a date together. I thought the date went well and he reassured me by texting me the next day saying he had a great time and that we should hang out again soon. We texted for the next couple weeks and then eventually he didn’t respond to my last text. I waited to see if he would text me, but he never did. I don’t think this was rude behavior, it was just confusing to me because he made me feel like the date went well. It would have been more considerate of him to tell me he wasn’t interested anymore or that something else in his life was going on. (7100)

8. One time I sot of experienced rejection was from a guy who I would study with for a class. One day he told me “I just want to let you know I’m not looking for a relationship right now, I don’t want to lead you on”. Calm down, we are just studying. I haven’t ever been able to figure out why he thought I was romantically interested in him, aside from him thinking he is so awesome that everyone would want to be with him.(2662)

8. I was recently rejected by a man after we had been seeing one another for a couple months. Rather than tell me that he was no longer interested in the relationship, he started making a variety of excuses as to why he was unable to see me that day. This continued everyday for the next three weeks, making me extremely irritated with him. I feel as if this was his intention because he did not want to be the one to end the relationship. I gave him the option of making more time for me or to stop talking to me all together, he chose the latter. I believe the way he went about this process was malicious and inconsiderate. I would have preferred that he had been honest in the beginning and told me he no longer wanted to continue. Although, the best thing he could have done in this situation would be to continue seeing me and give me his undivided attention while treating me like a goddess. (6259)

8. A boy I liked in high school rejected me. But it was more of a silent rejection; he would just talk to me to be polite then go about whatever he was doing. He wasn’t rude at all. I wasn’t sure at first if he understood I liked him or not, but after a few months of waiting and hoping I got the message. I was a little sad at first but I just moved on focusing on schoolwork and friends. Had he outright told me I guess it would have been nicer since then I would have had a strait answer, but the message was clear enough.

My first boyfriend also rejected me when I was a sophomore in high school. I think that was because he expected more of a physical relationship than I was comfortable with. So he dumped me over the phone but always hung around and followed me a lot at school and continually texted me. At first I was really sad and lonely but with time and friends it got better. And then I realized how creepy he actually was since he always dated younger more inexperienced girls then dumped them when they wouldn’t put out. I think his thought process was that if he dumped me I would be so sad I would do anything to get him back. It didn’t end well for him. He could have dumped me in a more polite manner but given the situation I don’t think it would have made a difference, I needed the shock to realize what a bad boyfriend he actually was. (5369)

8. One time, I invited a guy I was seeing to a dance with me my freshman year of college and he said he couldn’t go because he had “rehearsal.” So I was completely okay with this and moved on…later that night I decide to go to an after party and sure enough, he was hooking up with another girl in someone’s bedroom. I think this was a very inconsiderate way to end the relationship because I had to be publicly humiliated as well as lied to. It would be more considerate if he had been honest with me. (0572)

8) Many years ago I liked this guy who was often passing his nights with his friend at the same bar I used to go to. I was really attracted to him and often I tried to talk to him or to make him notice my interest. We had a girlfriend in common who knew him pretty well. After noticing my interest he decided to tell this girl to let me know he didn’t like me in order to get rid of me without having to deal with the situation. I found him to be a coward and an insensitive person since he could have found a better way to make me understand he wasn’t interested. There was no need to make me feel bad and ashamed for having tried to get to know him. (7500)

8. One time I was rejected thorugh a text message. This was an extremely insensitive way of rejection considering I had known him for some time and had previously dated for over a year. It made me feel sad and angry all at the same time. We haave so much available technology that people think it is a perfectly fine substitute for human interaction. Situations of such sensitive subjects should never be dealt with trough technology. He should have talked to me face to face instead of cowering behind a cell phone. (6991)

8. I have been rejected by men many times because I would not "put out." Males also tell you that they are interested and then all of a sudden disappear, and you had no idea why, when the previous day I had been told how much the guy cares about me. They do not give explanations sometimes for things and I believe that is insensitive and rude. I would rather them even say that they got "busy" then to disappear, and try to spare my feelings. Sometimes the unknown is worse than knowing. 6947

8.) I was once rejected by a guy through a third party. His brother called and told me that he wasn’t attracted to me anymore. We were both fairly young, but at the time I felt that it was insensitive for the guy not to explain his feelings directly to me. I think men should definitely make an effort verbally communicate their feelings or lack thereof to women directly so that she has a sense of closure. (2387)

8. Earlier this summer, I was seeing someone who I thought had relationship potential. We had great chemistry and he was always the one taking the steps towards the more serious stages, while I was completely letting the ball fall in his court. He was calling me "babe" and I was letting him do so but not doing so back and making it clear that I was not headed towards a clingly or uncomfortable stage at any point. He ended up moving into the same house as my ex and hanging out with him a lot more. All of a sudden he was getting more and more distant and after a rude evening where he bailed on our plans last minute, I decided I was not going to text him again. I assumed he would text me again to make plans, but I never got another text from him again. His rejection was a passive move so I would identify it as insensitive rather than rude. It would have been more considerate for him to explain his reason for being over our situation because I cannot guess his thinking. It is more of a bother to not know then to have been verbally explained why. (8638)

8. Two weeks ago I was talking to a guy, who previously had been categorized in my eyes as a friend, at a party. As we talked throughout the night, there was something a little more between us that made me wonder what was going on. The next few days we continued our normal texting, but it had turned from friends to more than that. The next weekend rolled around and when I saw him at a party, he was completely with another girl and showed me no attention. I found this to be inconsiderate and rude because above anything else, we were friends, but that was the last thing he was treating me like. It made me feel insignificant and dumb for thinking that he had liked me more, and now since I developed somewhat “more than friend” feelings, I didn’t know how to look at him as just a friend again. I ignored him the rest of the night, even when he eventually came up to me, flirting. It was rather embarrassing for him, as he thought I didn’t see him with the girl and believed it was okay to flirt. There really was no other considerate way to act, other than either not have leading me on or just not have been all over another girl. (2501)

8. I have not experienced an instance where I was rejected by someone of the opposite sex (I do not usually pursue men if I don’t think they will be are interested). (1252)

8. I haven’t personally experienced rejection by the opposite sex, but my friends, while reacting to rejection, tend to gather groups of friends and review conversations or text messages so that they can question what went wrong with the support of a group. Usually, the guy has rejected them bluntly or has simply stopped answering their text messages. I think being forward or blunt about the rejection is the best way, in my opinion, as the message is clear. However, I think guys could find some way to deliver the message in a slightly nicer way. (9166)

8. I have never feel flat out rejected, but I have had guy friends that slowly drifted away once they got girlfriends. I think that it was more of an issue with the girls not feeling secure in their relationship, but maybe talking it out with me would have been a more considerate way to handle the situation rather than just distancing themselves completely over time, and then becoming friends again when the relationship didn’t work out. (8993)

8. I wasn’t rejected by a guy that I was attracted to but I can give an example from my life where I was rejected by a guy I wanted to be friends with. He was my ex-boyfriend. After we broke up, I wanted to continue being friends with him but he didn’t want to be friends with me because he still had romantic feelings for me. I felt hurt and betrayed because he couldn’t deal with his feelings towards me to continue to be friends with me. It seems guys have a harder time putting their feelings aside (especially romantic feelings).(5702)

  1. 8.) I have never been flat out rejected from a male, because I have never had the courage to flat out hit on a guy. Instead when I find a male attractive I will usually just smile and see if he tries to talk to me. More often than not, he will hit on my more outgoing friends who put themselves out there more. (1324)

8. One particular instance where a male rejected me happened in the recent past. I had been talking to this person that I had met and we hit it off. He would always talk to me as if we were already in a relationship and would act extremely interested in me, which obviously kept me engaged and hopeful that something might come of it. However, one day he posted something for his girlfriend to celebrate their one year anniversary. I felt extremely rejected because not only did he post this publically, but he completely shut me out of his life after he knew I was aware of the whole situation. (8417)

I had a boyfriend break up with me out of the blue, because it was “getting too serious”. It wasn’t very serious at all, he hadn’t even met my parents, so I was confused. Later I found out that was just his excuse to break up. In a way, that was considerate of him to try and spare my feelings I guess, but lying isn’t a great option. At the time I was very confused, and then when I learned the real reason later, I was more hurt than I would have been if I had known that from the start. He should have just been upfront and honest, even though it’s awkward.

I was once put in a situation with my ex boyfriend who had previously appeared to be more interested in me than he later led on to be. He had a girlfriend after me who I didn’t know about, and instead of telling me, he pawned me off on his friend to be his partner for pool, which ended up working out in my favor. (5857)

8. The most memorable instance I have of being snubbed by a man I was attracted to would be freshman year when I was exceedingly attracted to one of my good guy friend’s roommates. I’d say the biggest negative factor to the situation however was my naivety and my unwillingness to recognize the clear signs that my infatuation was not evenly reciprocated. After we finally hooked up and it didn’t go well I felt that he was incredibly mean and insensitive, when I shouldn’t have hooked up with him in the first place. Now, however, we are better friends than ever, after I was able to let go of the presumptions I had about making our relationship into something it isn’t. (6503)

I am not confident enough to go out and hit on a guy. So, I guess I have never been flat out rejected. However, I was attracted to this guy. We were talking and flirting for a long time. He kept telling me that he wanted to take me out on a date and was consistently complimenting me and telling me I was different. All of a sudden, he stopped talking to me. It was clear that he wasn’t interested anymore. Though it was not a rejection, it sure felt like one. It made me feel like I was not good enough, and that everything he said was a lie. My self-esteem was very low for a little while. I honestly do not know if there would have been a better way to reject me. I feel like if he flat out told me he was not interested anymore, it would still hurt the same. (3651)

I can’t really think of a time I was rejected by the other sex, particularly because I never really put myself out on a limb to get rejected. I have never made it overly obvious I liked a guy, or directly gone up to him and told him. (9232)

In the sixth grade I tried to be friends with a guy who was very smart and funny. He told me he did not want to be my friend because I was a girl and he told me to go play with some dolls. I thought it was very rude and that my being a girl was a terrible reason to not want to be friends with me. (9031)

8. I remember one time that I really liked a guy and I thought he was into me as well. We dated for a month and then he literally stopped talking to me completely. I just remember feeling so confused and sad at first because I really liked him and he just completely cut off contact from me; I felt like the only reason he dated me for a month was because he wanted to have sex with me. But then, I got angry because that is the cowardly way out. It’s so much harder to tell a girl that you do not want to keep seeing her than it is to stop talking to her. I respect men who have the courage to tell a girl in person and I really look down upon cowards. (2307)

8. This guy told me he didn’t want to have sex with me anymore because he didn’t want to lead me on.

I was living in the same apartment complex as him and about to move 45 minutes away. I wasn’t trying to date him so I knew that this wasn’t the case. I got mad at him and told him to fuck off because I had never been denied sex before. It made me feel angry because I knew there was a reason that he wasn’t telling me about and it also made me feel a bit insecure.

Later I found out that since I was going to be leaving, he decided to start having sex with another girl in my apartment and that was the reason I got denied. (1109)

8. I have never really been completely rejected by a male. The extent to reject that I have seen from a male was when he told me he was not ready for a relationship and that he did not think it would be fair to continue on the path we were on. He did it in a polite manner and really explained himself. 9295

I tried to hook up with a guy once that was sort of considered a “man-whore” when we were both intoxicated. He rejected me while we were making out saying that he wanted to wait until we were both sober. I highly doubt that was actually true though, and I find it hard to believe that he cared about waiting until we were both sober. I do admire though his way of letting me down smoothly and in a rather subtle manner. (1160)

I can’t think of an instance in which a male rejected me explicitly. The more I reflect on this question, I feel that it is much more likely for men to be rejected by women than women by men. Though women in this day and age may pride themselves on their independence and graduals escape from societal confines, one societal norm that seems to be pretty consistent is that men pursue women much more frequently than women pursue men. For this reason I feel that men are much more subject to rejection than women. (8077)

I often don’t put myself out there toward men of the opposite sex, but rather allow them to come to me. In the instances where I have put myself out to someone who I was attracted to it yielded successful.(0423)

8. I was once broken up with for no apparent reason. He made up all sorts of excuses for why things weren’t working out. I had genuinely cared for him, so I was crushed when he ended it and quickly moved on to someone else. I later found out that he broke up with me because he couldn’t handle the thought that he was socially beneath me. He could have handled things in a much better way. The most considerate thing for him to do would have to just be honest with me. Regardless, I would have been hurt, but I could have dealt with the pain of his inadequacies better than I did the thought that he replaced me. (0946)

8. We were really close friends and I know that he knew I liked him more than just a friend but I was not sure if he felt the same way so one day I told him while we were texting and at first he ignored the text and continued responding to my other texts and so I told him again and he told me he had no idea I had felt this way. I asked if he had anything else to say and he just said again that he was honestly shocked and speechless. He did not mention if he felt the same way so I assumed that he didn’t. A few weeks later I found out he was in a relationship which he had failed to mention to me. Had I known the situation I would not even have disclosed my attraction to him at that time. I wish that instead of avoiding the question he would have told me outright if he had ever liked me or not and I also wish he would have been honest that he was in a committed relationship, especially since we were close friends. I believe that he did not want to tell me about his new girlfriend because he already knew how I felt about him and he didn’t want to risk the friendship. (7437)

8. I don’t have a lot of chances to get rejected because I’m usually not the one to initiate anything. I’m not scared to make the first move but it’s usually when I’m sure the guy is interesting. Although, I’ve been cheated on which I guess is a pretty shitty way of being rejected. That probably could have been handled better. (7663)

8) In high school, I had once had a crush on a guy, who I met at a movie theater. We had kept in constant communication for about a month, but the relationship seemed completely platonic, and I had given him no indication that I liked him at more than a surface level. At one point we spoke over the phone, and I had the courage to ask if he was attracted to anyone at our school, to see if he would pick up the hint that I liked him. He said that he was attracted to my best friend, which was evident to me that he was not interested. I think this was a perfect example of how men are not perceptive to women’s feelings. We had been talking consistently for weeks, so when I found out that he merely saw me as a friend, and instead had actual feelings for my best friend, it hurt my feelings a little bit. They were not aware that they were hurting my feelings, but the rejection was unpleasant. (3886)

8. I can only recall one time when I was somewhat rejected by a male. I use the word somewhat, because I never had enough confidence to directly tell the person how I was feeling. It was back in my senior year of high school and another person told the guy that I had a crush on him. At that point, he wouldn’t return by text messages and avoid me during school hours. It was clear he had no interest in starting a romantic relationship. I was quite upset about the encounter at the time and thought it was an insensitive way of handling the situation. (4610)

8. The only time I experienced rejection from the opposite sex was in elementary school, for I had a lot more courage back in those days than I do now. I remember going up to my crush at the time telling him that I thought he was cute and that I liked him and he simply just ran away without a word being said. This showed that I was able to be more expressive with my emotions than my male counterpart, but this experience may have scared me for life for in my later years I can never build up enough courage to flat out express my emotions to a male counterpart.

8. A while back, I was dating someone nonexclusively for six months. He refused to make it exclusive, stating the tired excuse of needing his independence as a reason. One day out of the blue, he called and broke up with me, even though we were never technically dating. I found this particularly rude and condescending to “break up” with someone you never even officially dated.(8531)

When I was in my junior year of high school. There was a boy that I really liked and we had been talking for several months. Prom was coming up, and I kept dropping hints that I would want him to take me. He kept putting off, saying it was too far in advance to talk about or we’d “figure it out later”. Eventually we stopped talking, and he took his ex girlfriend to prom, only to get back together with her later that week. If they were more considerate, he could have never led me on in the first place if he had known he still had feelings for this girl. Honestly, this is a perfect example of how boys can be completely oblivious of girls’ emotions. (2431)

A guy I was starting to talk to, and who I had gone out with a few times, and who I was attracted to, told me after a party we were both at that he wasn’t attracted to me and just wanted to be my friend. I thought his behavior was very considerate in that he told me as soon as he knew he wasn’t interested, and didn’t wait until after we slept together. I still felt bad because it’s never fun to have another person tell you that they don’t want you, but overall I respected the way he went about it and don’t think he could have done it better or in a more considerate way. (4669)

8. In high school, there was a guy that I was really attracted to that went to a different school. We met at a football game and started flirting over texts and phone calls. For a little over a month, it seemed like things were going great, and then one day, he just stopped texting me back. He didn't answer the phone and he never spoke to me again. While I understand if he just wasn't interested anymore, I would've appreciated some sort of sign or explanation rather than sitting there wondering why he had suddenly decided to cease contact with me. I thought it was rude and immature, and it would have been a lot better if he had at least told me that he didn't want to keep this up, or that he was interested in someone else, even if it was over a text. (8359)

8. I have been rejected by a guy but it was not because he did not want to be with me but because at that time in his life he was going through a lot in his life and did not know how to deal with everything. He was very harsh about it, telling me he only saw me as a friend when I knew he was lying. I was not upset about his decision to not be together, but the way he handled it. It made me extremely upset, sad and confused because I knew he had strong feelings for me, but could not understand what happened to him. Eventually he worked on that rough patch in his life, we talked through everything, I let him understand that his manner was completely wrong and hurtful which he understood, and we are currently together. (8436)

8. I can remember a time where I was rejected by someone of the opposite sex when my ex-boyfriend broke up with me. He wasn’t rude or inconsiderate, maybe since the reason we were breaking up was because he was moving. Of course, I was hurt and a bit sad, but overall I wasn’t angry about it. Thinking back on it, the relationship seems sort of trivial in comparison to where I am today. 3066

8. In instances where I have felt rejected by the opposite sex, their behavior was rude but not blatantly so, they merely decided it was better to avoid both me and the situation I was a part of at the time. It really couldn’t have been done differently unless they just didn’t do it at all but it made me very upset. (6536)

8) One time I thought that a friend was really cute so I went out of my way to be helpful and kind to him. But I honestly think it just creeped him out. They stopped responding to my messages or would give me one word answers. When I saw him in public he would always avoid eye contact and seemed to want to get away as fast as he could. Especially because he was a family friend and all I did was try to be nice to him since he claimed he didn’t have any friends, I think his reactions to me were really rude and insensitive. I was only useful to him when he needed me but other than that I couldn’t offer him what he really wanted to I was tossed on the side. It hurt a lot to be ignored especially when I went out of my way to make him feel welcomed. I think he could have just been nice and returned my texts and treated me how he would treat any person he cared about. I didn’t want any special treatment but he could have been a lot more appreciative of what I had done for him. (2321)

  1. 8 My ex and I had a really back and forth kind of relationship, and at one point in the middle of everything I was basically begging for him to take me back. He was so blunt in his rejection and it stung badly. He basically just said “no, I like [insert girl’s name here] now. Get off my porch.” That was a time when the straight forwardness of guys really sucked. (0497)

8. I had a hard time thinking of an instance when I had been rejected by a guy, because mostly guys approach me. If I was one to approach guys, maybe I would get rejected more often. However, I do remember one instance, in the 8th grade when I had the biggest crush on a guy who played in the same basketball league as I did. We met at a party and started chatting online for a while. After some time, I gushed to one of my closest friends that I think Peter was cute. She wanted to help and so she decided to IM him when I was by her and started asking him questions about me to see if she could pry out information from him. I was certain he liked me too, considering how amazing our conversations were and how flirtatious he was, sending me smiley faces and winks here and there. Before I knew it, he told her “oh, she’s an awesome friend, but nothing more.” The next time I saw him after that conversation, he acted as if he did not know me, ignored me when I walked in and did not make any eye contact. It was surprising to me that a guy who was so open, talkative and flirtatious one moment could make a 180 degree turn and become a stranger after one conversation. (0613)

8. I have had one boy that I was attracted to cut off contact with me. Later I saw him with another girl. I don’t think there would have been a nicer way to do it. It is what it is. (9164)

8. I really liked this guy who was in one of my psychology classes. He had asked me to go out to lunch with him a couple of times and I thought he was really sweet and nice. I had a sorority date night coming up and I thought I might as well try to ask him to be my date. After we finished studying for a test together, I took the leap of faith. I told him about the date function and how I thought it would be fun if he went with me as a friend. There was thirty seconds of silence before he finally responded. He said “Yeah… so I kind of have this feeling that you like me. So no, I don’t want to go with you.” I immediately said, “Ok” and then ran away. I was really hurt by his extremely rude way to respond to the invitation. He could have handled the situation a little more delicately to spare my feelings. (5659)

8. One situation I was in when I experienced rejection was when my high school boyfriend broke up with me, which at the time felt like a huge tragedy. The way he broke up with me was very inconsiderate but that's to be expected from an 18 year old so looking back at it it's a lot more understandable. I felt really upset because I never got an explanation why our relationship was over and as a girl I wanted to know the reason behind it so I think a way that this could have been done more considerately would have been for him to explain what was wrong with our relationship especially if it was something he didn't like about me specifically because I value constructive criticism and I think it would have allowed me to grow rather than shrink myself from not knowing why. (7008)

8. I had been set up on a blind date, I was not thrilled about it, but things were going well after about an hour into lunch and I was reconsidering my opposition to the date in the first place. It was a little after this that he decided it was a good time to clarify that my friend had “oversold” me a bit and he was expecting someone a little different, and of course finished with a suggestion of just being friends. Of course I felt rejected, but more importantly I didn’t want to be friends with someone who was so blatantly rude, I couldn’t believe he couldn’t just wait for the date to at least end to tell me this. If he had finished the date, and simply told me he wanted to remain friends it would have been fine, but to interrupt lunch and add that my appearance was not what he expected was just rude, it made me feel like our great conversations hadn’t mattered. (0735)

8. When I was first beginning high school, I went to an event where all of the freshmen are locked inside the school campus for a night as sort of an orientation to the school. One of my brother’s best friends was working at the event and while I was there I decided to finally ask him out because I had always had a crush on him. He was very polite to me and told me that he already had a girlfriend, but that he was really sorry. I felt very disappointed but I was proud of myself for taking the chance and luckily he was very polite and kind about it. (6617)

8. I went on a few dates with this one guy and I was attracted to him and he was a nice guy. After a few dates we had already held hands and did cuddling but no kissing. Finally one night I went in to kiss him but the sparks didn’t fly. I didn’t say anything and neither did he. We went on a few more dates and I went with it because I was still interested to see where things were going and in him, even though I didn’t feel anything in the kiss. Maybe I was trying to forces something that wasn’t there. Anyways’ a few days passed and he stopped calling and texting. I ignored it at first but then I was a bit angry about it because I didn’t get an explanation or anything. We weren’t exclusive so I wasn’t angry about him dating other people but I did finally I ask him why he just stopped calling and texting. All he said was, “let’s face it, nothing is there!” This was very rude to me. True, I didn’t feel any sparks but we did become close, I would say friends so he shouldn’t have just stopped talking to me the way he did. I was hurt! (7302)

I had an ex-boyfriend who rejected me by cheating on me. He made a bet with his friends that he would sleep with me after we had broken up and still be able to hook up with some other girl. He lied to me about what happened when I confronted him and did not seem at all affected when I told him that I didn’t want anything to do with him after that. He was incredibly insensitive and inconsiderate, and he made me feel like I was just there for his pleasure. I felt used and dirty. He could have easily broken up with me and although it would have hurt, it would have been less demeaning than cheating. 4531

#8 I went on a couple of dates with a boy that I had a crush on since freshmen year of college. I wrote him a letter and got him a Valentine’s Day gift and since he did not make any plans (although I had plans with friends anyway) I figured I would go work on my project and hope he would come in. He did and I gave him the letter and present. His face changed and I suddenly knew it was coming. He started to explain that his past relationships really screwed him up and then said the best line I could ever think of to totally annoy and upset a person, “Basically I’m friend zoning you ha ha.” It was a kick in the face, but not only did I sit through a 10 min speech of him obviously breaking things off, but he actually used the term “friend-zoning.” As if I do not know what he was doing. He then said he was sorry in a way that made me feel like the smallest person in the world and got up with my letter and gift in his hand. He kept looking at it and to save us both the torture I told him he could just give that back to me. He set it down awkwardly on the table and went back to sit down. I didn’t know what to do with myself as we were the only ones in the room and I was still absorbing what had happened. I pretended to continue working on my homework but could not focus. He annoyingly asked me about the homework assignment guidelines as if he had not just broken up with me 30 seconds ago. The moment another person came in I shuffled out. It was the worst feeling in the world as it was Valentine’s Day and he left me walking aimlessly not knowing where to go, before I could not longer hold in the tears. It was the worst feeling in the world as it was the boy I had a major crush on since day one of school and my closest friend in the department who dumped on Valentine’s Day. He did not have the decency to break the news at least the day after Valentine’s Day or in words that did not involve the term “the friend zone.” It was brutal. (2259)

8. I saw a guy at a restaurant that I thought was attractive and I went up and talked to him. Although he was friendly, he ultimately rejected me by telling me he had a girlfriend. I thought that his behavior and the way he “rejected” me was not rude or insensitive. In fact, I thought he was extremely tactful in the way he handled the situation. Despite the fact that he was considerate, I still felt embarrassed that I had built up the courage to talk to a complete stranger, something I would not usually do, only to be told that he was not interested. This embarrassment was compounded by the fact that the guy’s friend was nearby and watching our interaction. I could see him smiling as I left. Overall, I do not think the guy could have acted in a more considerate way. (7413)

8. I have not been rejected. (3892)

8. I’ve never really been directly rejected by a member of the opposite sex, as I generally tend to date my guy friends and there is a long build-up to it. I have, however, had crushes on my guy friends that never lead to anything, but I feel if I were to tell them it would have been more awkward than anything. I don’t think they would be insensitive or rude, but it would probably damage our friendship for awhile. (3816) 8. When I was in middle school, I wrote this long letter to my crush that I had for a long time. I was confessing my “love” for him, and he rejected me, but not before telling/showing his friends what I had said. I felt like that was very inconsiderate and if he was going to reject me, he should have done it privately and not make a mockery out of it. It really hurt my feelings and made me not want to tell a boy that I liked him before he told me he liked me first. (2418)

8) I was really into this guy and it was definitely obvious that I liked him. He rejected me indirectly by hooking up with my friend. This was inconsiderate and insensitive because he knew that I liked him and that she was my friend (I hadn’t told her I liked him). It made me feel like I wasn’t good enough. A more considerate way of rejecting me would have been to not involve a friend of mine. (9634)

8. In 7th grade, I had a fat crush on this boy who was in my class. I didn’t ever directly tell him that I had a crush on him, but it became known throughout my grade that I had a crush on him. I know he knew about it, and later, he just slightly avoiding me in social situations. For example, we used to all each lunch together, and he would go out of his way not to sit next to me. And later, he got a girlfriend. I don’t think that it was inconsiderate or rude, or maybe I was being blinded. But I think that he just kind of avoided me to let the crush fizzle away. In middle school, everyone gets a new crush every other week, and by him avoiding me, I felt like it was a clear message without directly saying that he didn’t like me. I was obviously devastated for a while, but then I got over it because it was just a crush. (0018)

8) An instance where I have been rejected of the opposite sex has not really happened yet because in my culture we do not really date unless it is for marriage. But I have an instance where I rejected the opposite sex multiples time but he did not give up until I gave into him. (4605)

8. I already mentioned how I was ghosted by a man I was interested in. I would consider his behavior to be both rude and inconsiderate. If he had told me earlier on that he lost interest in me and had moved onto someone else, I would not have been as offended. He was not very good at communicating his feelings with me and that was a big problem in our “relationship”. Although we were not explicitly dating, we were still spending a good amount of time together, and it is completely normal to lose interest in someone. I just wish he had been upfront with how he felt in a considerate manner instead of avoiding me. (2775)

Imagine that you have known someone of the opposite sex for about a month. You have dated this person several times, but so far there hasn't been any kind of physical intimacy (holding hands, kissing, etc.) between the two of you. Now, you are out on a date with this person again.

How would you try to influence this person in each of the following


#9. Situation 1: The date has been going very well and you feel very physically attracted to this person. How would you influence this person to become physically intimate, and to go as far sexually as you wanted to go?

  1. I would hint towards physicality by touching their shoulders or their thighs while having conversation or just being extra flirtatious. I would maybe try and lean in for a kiss if the timing felt right but anything more than that would just feel forced and wrong. If things are going to happen sexually, that should just happen naturally. (7407)

9. I would sit or stand close to the person, make a lot of eye contact, and accept any intimate approaches the guy initiates that I feel comfortable with. I would follow my instincts but also do whatever I could do to let the person know I was interested and attracted to him.

9. In this situation, at the end of the date I would ask if he would want to come in and watch a movie. If nothing happens during that, I would maybe ask him why he hasn’t made any moves. I understand some guys are more timid and are terrified to make any sort of move and sometimes it takes the girl to address the issue because some guys are so used to rejection. (9097)

9. If I was dating someone and I wanted to become more intimate I would suggest something like watching a movie somewhere alone, such as my place or his. The key is to be alone in a safe space. Then it would be subtle body language from there. Such as sitting closer to cuddling, and eye contact. (4012)

9. Being that I am a girl, I usually let the guys initiate the first move however I do know that some guys are too nervous to or can’t tell whether I am interested in physical intimacy as well. I think a good way to show that I am interested would be to use small gestures such as reaching out for their hand or holding hands to see if they pull away or resist it. Being flirty in ways that use physical touch also can be a way to signify that I am interested in intimacy. If I were trying to influence this person to become physically intimate I would maybe test the boundaries first by giving them a kiss on the cheek if we are in a setting that seems appropriate. For me personally, I think I would be too nervous to verbally ask them if they are interested in going further with me, so I think I would just play the field to give them signs that I want something more and if they don’t initiate I would probably give up. I think over text, I have much more confidence and I would be able to ask the guy why he didn’t make a move or tell him I wanted more, but on a date I think I would be to shy to explicitly say anything out loud in fear of being rejected. (9994) 9. In an intimate situation that I was interested in becoming sexual, I would make gestures to let the guy I am with know that I am interested, either by getting close to him or touching his arm, some sort of indication of intimacy. I generally will look into his eyes and smile a lot.(2955)

9. In order to influence this man I would be extremely flirty and probably use body language to signal that I wanted a more physically intimate relationship. By touching his arm when I am laughing, sitting closer to him than usual, or whispering something in his ear I would signal my interest. If he wasn’t taking the hints I think that I would tell him I want to kiss him (I am normally very upfront and obvious when dating). (8237)

9. If I feel physically attractive to a man after the first date I would first try to suppress this emotion and “play hard to get.” This would probably fail, in which case I would begin the flirting process. Once I know that he is willing and wanting to become physically intimate with me, I would wait for him to take the lead. If I wanted to do nothing more than kiss my date, I would wait for him to kiss me once the date had ended and then say goodnight. If I were willing to do more I would invite him inside, pour a glass of wine, and wait for him to make his move. If at any point I felt like things had been moving too fast, I would text my mother our code word and she would call me and tell me that my cat has died. I would become very upset and ask that he leave. (6259)

  1. 9. I would probably draw myself closer to him and see if he responds. Usually I could tell if there is a mutual interest relatively quickly just by seeing how he reacts and chooses to also accept my closeness. If he retreats and/or verbally indicates I’m too close for comfort or anything, then I instantly give space and don’t attempt to get closer again, 60% out of respect for him and 40% out of embarrassment. I usually don’t initiate, even if I want to; this has happened twice in my whole experience with dating so I consider myself relatively new to initiating things like this (0531).

9. I would just ask him if he felt comfortable taking the next steps in the relationship. I wouldn’t really discuss how far we were both willing to go, I would just ask him to be clear on his expectation and I would do the same. I don’t really think talking about sexuality or having sex should be so complicated, there shouldn’t be this dance around the point, just make clear what you want, because if you don’t ask you defiantly wont get anything (5369)

9. It is mainly body language. To let a guy know that I am interested I would smile more, blink more, make eye contact, nod through the conversation, make sure we are facing each other, and my arms are not crossed at all. Then for example, if they say something funny you can touch the side of their arm. Typically men respond well to a physical touch. (2662)

9. I would influence the person to become physically intimate by acting more flirty. I would do this by smiling, making more eye contact, being happy, and touching the person more. Examples of touching the person include putting my hand on their arm while I am laughing or sitting closer to them on a couch. (2992)

9. I would probably have us go to a private place like one of our rooms or houses and then engage in an activity like watching a movie or listening to music where we can get closer. And honestly I would want to maybe share a bottle of wine or some sort of alcohol so we can both get a little loose and open up a little more because in my experience, getting a little drunk with the opposite sex usually goes toward the direction of sexual appeal. (6858)

9. When it comes to these sort of signs with me, it is 100% body language. If I am into the person, I’ll likely be more engaged in the conversation and enhance physical contact. I feel like girls don’t need to go to great lengths to show a man that they’re wanting to get physically intimate—they tend to pick up on those signs very easily. (0572)

9)If I notice my feelings are reciprocated I would just look for physical contact by for example sitting really close to him and look at him in the eyes often and for long. It is hard however to describe what would I do cause the way people respond to attraction is pretty natural and depend on the situation. If two people like each other they will be naturally drawn to one another with no need of specific directions from any of the two parts involved. (7500)

9. I would plan an outing in which we would be inevitably close. Movies at home, a theme park where you are sitting next to each other often, etc. While close, I would do something that would be a non-obviously sexual move such as nudging or touching him while laughing or telling a complex story. (8638)

9.) Even if I wanted to be physically intimate with a guy, I would wait for him to show clear signs that he was into me as well. I would probably be a little more flirtatious and touchy-feely than usual, and hope that the guy responded to those signals. (2387)

9. Instead of going out for the next date, I would suggest staying in and watching a movie. Honestly, if someone is not shoing much physical attraction to me then I don’t generally bother trying to make them. If a guy is attracted to you, you shouldn’t have to try that hard and if they’re not, then you shouldn’t be dating them anyway.(6991)

9. I would try to be flirtatious with my eyes and lean closer to him. That is all as I am not one to initiate that kind of thing. (5908)

9. I would make some hints that I liked him by touching his arm and being more flirtatious. If that wasn’t working maybe I would say something directly like “I really want to kiss you.” I would assume that this person was shy and that I needed to be a little more forward with him. (0632)

9. I would try to increase the physical contact between the two of us by rubbing his arm or leg or playfully hitting them in the arm when they make a sarcastic remark. I’ve found then men respond really well to physical touch. (2307)

9. I would initiate something small first like attempting to hold their hand and if they seem comfortable with that I would continue to be more physical (rub their leg, put my hand on their leg/arm, etc.) If it is something a little more serious like sex I would probably ask them about it before unless I felt we both mutually wanted to engage in this behavior. (1252)

9. To influence the person to become more physically intimate I would probably try to hang out more, in more private settings. I would also try to initiate more conversations and eye contact. (8993)

12. When it comes to initiating sexuality for the first time, the opposite sex will put their hand on your thigh and see how close they can get before you either move/pull away or turn towards them possibly signifying you are interested as well. (9994)

9. I would ask this person that instead of going to a date at a restaurant or any public place that we go do something at his house or my house. We can watch a movie together and have dinner in and see how the mood goes. At the same time you don’t want to be too pushy but create a mood that suggests more intimacy. (5702)

9. In this situation, I would try to make subtle hints that I was interested in him. I would probably move from acting as if we were just friends to acting more flirtatious and playful. I feel that in order to make a situation intimate, it not only needs to be in a private setting, but it also needs to be preceded by getting rid of the awkward tension that initial physical intimacy with someone often has. (8417)

  1. 9.) I would probably influence them with some liquid courage. Going out for drinks with someone you are physically attracted to can help dissolve any inhibitions that a person might have about becoming physically intimate.

9. When I am attracted to someone, I become very touchy because I feel comfortable. If I were on a date, I would initiate physical intimacy by holding hands or rubbing his leg under the table. Also, I would lean in for the kiss when we hugged good night. (9336)

Situation 1: Maybe I would ask him if he wanted to watch a movie at my house after dinner. Then once watching the movie I would cuddle up next to him. If he seemed into that I would look at him and lean in a little to see if he did the same. If he did I’d go in for a kiss and continue the same way. I’m not good at going out on a limb, so I would take baby steps to see how he is responding and just take it slow step by step. (9232)

I would try to hint at what I wanted to do, and would start moving closer or touching him at any chance given. Or I would just go ahead and make the first move if that didn’t work.

I would probably begin touching his arm or playfully nudge him from time to time and see how he reacts.(3651)

9. I would ask them to go back to my place, lay in bed with them, cuddle with the, start kissing them, and then bam. (1109)

I wouldn’t want to coerce them into doing anything they are not ready for. I also don’t like to be the one to make the first move. I would probably just brush up against their arm and see how they react to that. 9031

9. Small sudden hints, for instance if I wanted a guy to hold my hand or put his arm around me I would suggest going to see a horror movie. This is probably cliché but what better reason is there to grab onto the male you are attracted by being scared of something. Not only that, but I would probably hint to him to hold my hand by brushing his arm or hand with my hand. 9295

I would take charge and literally just grab their hand or do something flirty like rub arms with them. I’m not afraid of making the first move when I know that there is mutual attraction there. I think that a woman can just as easily make the first move and doesn’t have to wait for the guy. (1160)

If I wanted to take the steps to initiate more physical intimacy, I would start by initiating closer physical contact. Sitting closer together, brushing up against them, putting your arm on their leg as you sit next to them all seem to be social cues that guys are pretty receptive to. As a woman, I wouldn’t be comfortable taking it any farther than that as I am still old fashioned in the sense that I believe men should take the lead in initiating a first kiss and physical advances, but I would see how they react to those simple cues. (8077)

In order to show someone that I was physically attracted to them I would probably sit in closer proximity to them, smile more, and possibly physically touch them more for example touch their back for a second. Beyond physical proximity and paying compliments such as “I really enjoy ” about you I probably wouldn’t initiate any physically intimacy any further than that.(0423)

9. I would probably just stand more closely to him and open up the invitation for physical contact by doing small things, like touching his arm or maybe putting my head on his shoulder. I would also try to seem more confident. (9166)

9. I tend to think that men really do not need a lot of encouragement to move forward in intimate situations. I am generally not comfortable making the first move unless I know the person pretty well. I would maybe suggest doing something like taking a walk on the beach or going to a movie or just talking in the car to see where things would lead. (0946)

9. If I felt comfortable enough with the person I would just bring the subject up to test if they wanted to engage in more intimate behavior or if they were completely against it. If I was not comfortable enough to bring up the subject I would probably leave the situation alone for a while longer until I felt more comfortable and if after some time nothing had changed I would probably walk away and assume that he simply did not want to take things to the next level. (7437)

9) In this scenario, I would probably start by attempting to make more serious eye contact with that person. I would generally try to be closer to the person in terms of distance. I may say something that would insinuate that I wanted to further the relationship. (3886)

9. I would influence a person to become physically intimate by giving him small hints that I was interested, such as hold his hand or give them a light touch their knee or shoulder. If there was a positive response to those advances I might kiss him or wait for him to make a move. It depends on the situation and how confident and comfortable I am with the person. (4610)

9. I am usually not a confrontational person, so I would not usually take action in a situation like this, but if I had to I would suggest going back to either my place or his place to hangout in a more private and intimate setting. I would suggest to go home and watch a movie or something that involved being in close proximity, and then let the rest of the night fall into place.

9. To influence someone who I’ve been on some dates with to become physically intimate, I would more so verbally tell him how I feel than physically show it. I’m not one to be upfront with action because I pride myself more on how I can communicate with others. I prefer to be casual and take things slow, but the best way to know if someone is truly into you is to say something rather than act on it. Therefore, I am not the type to “influence” a guy to become physically intimate, and would rather let them take the reigns on when we would cross that stage. (2501)

9. If a date was going well, and I wanted to influence someone to become physically intimate, I would send subtle signals. Maybe prolonged eye contact, lingering touches, flirtatious banter, etc. I would let the person know I was interested without making the first move. (8531)

If I were trying to get a guy to be physically attracted to me, I would make flirty remarks and try to make physical contact such as touch their arm when I’m talking to them. Another thing I would do is laugh at all their jokes and act like everything they said was just great. (2431)

I would probably would kiss the guy I was on the date with. Since it would be the first time with physically intimacy, I probably would just kiss him. (4669)

9. I would probably try to drop subtle hints and initiate closer physical contact by making more eye contact, touching his hand/arm/shoulder here and there, or snuggling closer if it's cold. I generally don't like to make the first move, so I probably wouldn't do anything more drastic than that unless he initiated it. (8359)

9.If I saw that a date was going really well, and the guy was not making a move to kiss me, I would just be extra nice and playful, hugging him and touching him, but I would make no further moves. (8436)

9) If I wanted to influence someone to become physically intimate I would probably just kiss them at the end of the date which I would hope would let them know where I stood and then this would allow them to make the next move so to speak.(6536)

9) I think when it comes to girls trying to show they are interested in guys, they laugh and smile a lot more. I would walk closer to a guy I like and look at him more. Making eye contact and keeping it for longer periods of time seems to work. Touching their shoulders or brushing up against them to excite them. I would change my tone of voice to try and sound sexier. I make playful comments to see how they react and definitely compliment them so they feel confident. I tend to let my shirt go lower to show more cleavage and skirt go higher to show more leg too. (2321)

9. If I’ve been dating this person for a month with absolutely no physical contact and without having talked about how weird that is I would probably just assume he only liked me as a friend. If I were feeling really bold I would just ask. (7663)

  1. 9 I’d be very flirtatious and smile a lot. I’d also laugh at anything remotely close to a joke, and maybe even grab his hand or shoulder every now and then. I feel like it’s pretty easy to get men to take it to the next level, physically, so I don’t really have much of a strategy plan.(0497)

9. I would not try to influence the other person at all. It is not right to have a physical action simply because one side wants to. If anything, it would be a conversation, which I’ve actually had in my relationship, about what we want as a collective whole and what is okay. 3066

9. I am not one to make the first move, almost never. However, I do partake in many things to give him all the signs that I want him to make a move. I become very flirty and touchy. I make a lot of eye contact. I look him in his eyes, smile and look away. Then I begin looking at his lips and smiling. That usually gives them the green light that I do want him to kiss me. (0613)

9. I would probably touch his arm or make some sort of physical contact with him when we are talking. I believe this is a cue that I want something physically intimate to happen, even if it is just a kiss. Since we have gone on previous dates in the past, I may grab his hand as we walk together. When saying goodbye, I am not good at making the first move to kiss someone. But I would probably touch his hands, hug hum, and hope that he would initiate a kiss. I think things would progress from there on the next several dates. (7100)

9. If I had a chance on the date I would try to hold his hand or kiss him on the cheek. Something to let them know your interest. Otherwise I would try to be more approachable through body language. (9164)

9. If I was on a date with a man and I wanted to make him aware that I was really to become more intimate, I would give him hints by touching him and being very flirty. I would laugh at all of his jokes, no matter how unfunny they were, and touch his hands and shoulder while I laugh. I would flirt by making jokes about their lips. I would try to read the other person to see how they responded to my flirtations to make sure I was not making them uncomfortable. If by the end of the night he hadn’t made a move yet I would attempt to make a move. I would go in for a hug and then pull away a little so our faces were close and then he can decide to do the other 10% if he wants to. I honestly don’t know if I would actually be able to do that but I would hope that I would have the guts to if I really liked this guy. (5659)

9. I think that men are generally very sex driven, so if they aren't trying anything they are either uninterested or waiting for the okay from the girl. In this situation I would try to make some kind of intimate physical contact with him to let him know I was interested and make it known that I want something more. After that I would probably leave it up to the guy because I wouldn't want to come on too strong and I would be uncomfortable saying something or making any bold attempts. (7008)

9. Considering that no physical contact had been made I would start off slow, sitting a little closer to him, touching his shoulder occasionally as we talk, allow my hand to brush his while we’re walking. I wouldn’t do anything too bold since up until this point there has been no physical contact. I would also be more subtle because if it has been a month and he has not initiated anything up to this point it may be because he is not sexually attracted to me and I would not want to make him feel awkward. (0735)

9. In order to tell this person that I was ready to become more physically intimate I would use body language such as sitting closer to him when hanging out and being more open about holding hands in public. I would also talk to the person about how he felt so that we would be sure that we were both on the same page. (6617)

9. The first thing I would do would probably bump them shoulder to shoulder when we’re walking, so it would force us to walk closer together and hopefully have him grab my hand. If it were our first time being intimate I probably wouldn’t go further then kissing for that night. With that as we say goodbye I would just kiss him after a hug. Nothing too crazy and I’ve never had a guy pull away, but I have had a guy tell me he didn’t feel anything a few days later, but since it was just a kiss and nothing else it was nice that he didn’t let things go further. (7302)

I would flirt with him to let him know that I’m interested, but if I wanted to influence this person so that we went only as far as I wanted to go, I would make sure I have control of the situation. For example, if I only wanted to kiss, I would make sure his hands in an appropriate area. 4531

#9 I would lean in a lot closer to him, making sure our faces are close together and then look into his eyes or at his lips, and touch his arm or chest a lot when teasing him. (2259)

9. I would make sure I was in close physical proximity to the person, for instance, leaning against him or pressing by body close to his. If he did not get the hint with this, I would probably start being more forward with physical contact, touching his hair or near his face. I would also talk more softly and try to get the conversation to slow down and move away from mundane topics. If all else fails, I may try to initiate physical intimacy myself. (7413)

9. If it were really a problem that I have not had any physical intimacy after dating this person for a month, I would talk to him about it. I would ask if anything is wrong and if there is not anything wrong, then I would tell him that I want to move forward in the relationship. (3892)

10. To try to signify to the guy that I am not interested in becoming sexual I would try to create a more friendly environment. If I flirt with him then this could give him the impression that I am interested in something more. It has happened in the past where a guy tries to make a move and I have dodged his kiss, and although this is very awkward it immediately lets him know that he should not expect more. Friend-zoning a guy can be very difficult for me especially cause by nature I have a bubbly personality and so it is mistaken as being flirty and thus they assume I am interested in sexual intimacy.(9994)

9. I would probably read his body language and if I was sure he seemed into me I would flirt a bit to confirm and then kiss him myself. I don’t have a problem with making the first move. (3816 9. If I was vibing with a guy, and he hadn’t made a move on me yet, I would have one or two thoughts: He was either not that into me, or he was too shy to make a move. In the second instance, I still have a fighting chance. Therefore, I would influence the guy to make a move by physically flirting with him like touching his shoulder or knee every time I laughed or taking the invisible piece of lint out of his hair or shirt, or making sure I made great eye-contact with him every time he spoke, and if we were walking around, I would grab his arm and link it with mine. Just making sure at every possible moment I am making physical contact with this guy. (2418)

9) If I were trying to influence a guy to become physically intimate, I would approach the situation with signals rather than directly. These signals include smiling, laughing and flirtatious jokes. I would also occasionally touch his arm while speaking or laughing. I would not be direct because if he hasn’t made a move after going on dates for a month then it is possible that he is not interested, since guys are typically the ones to make the first move. If this goes on and really bothers me, however, I would eventually make the first move directly. (9634)

9. Situation 1: Maybe during the date, I would make more suggestive and flirty moves, like touch his arm/leg and lean in closer to him so he knows that I see him more than a friend. From there on, I would see if he has any mutual responses towards me. If there is, then hopefully he makes moves and if there isn’t, I would probably ask if he is interested in me. I think that respect is important, so I would want to make sure that he is on the same page as me before moving any further. I wouldn’t want to make a guy feel uncomfortable by making advances towards him if he was not that interested in me. (0018)

9) The way to get someone physically intimate would be sincere and cute with them and tell them how you feel and see if they are feeling the same way about you. Usually a couple is on the same page and should talk their feelings about and if you both are ready for it. I think you could see where it goes from there and how comfortable one is with the other. Even if both are very into each other if one is not ready for what the other is ready for then it should not be rushed. Intimacy is a very personal thing for people. If a girl wants intimacy they have to show the man that they want it and then the men will go for it. Although men are usually known as the more forward ones of the two genders they don’t pull the trigger until they know the girl wants it and feels the same about them. (4605)

9. The scenario is slightly strange for me because if neither of us has made a move after a month of dating, it kind of worries me. I believe that eye contact is very important in intimate situations. It helps reassure your partner of your interest in them. However, the key to physical intimacy is good communication. In this particular situation, I would ask the guy how he is doing and if he is comfortable with physical intimacy. Then as the intimacy progresses on, you should verbally check-in with your partner. (2775)

#10. Situation 2: The date has been going well, but you do not feel particularly physically attracted by this person. However, you can tell that this person is really turned on by you. Still, you know you're not interested in physical intimacy, and/or the subsequent involvement or commitment that might follow. How would you influence this person to avoid becoming sexual?

10. I am not great at telling a person I am not attracted to them directly so I would assume they could read my body language. In a situation when I am not attracted to a guy who is attracted to me, I try to seem less inviting. Sitting up straighter, making sure there is a distance between us should send a message that I’m not interested. (0632)

10. I would just tell him that I am not interested in sex before marriage or make up some type of lie so that this person fails to have any hope of being intimate with me, In this way, I am not hurting his feelings in a direct way that will damage his ego. But if I am not flat-out honest with a guy, they just don’t ever get the hint! (2418)

10. I would not give him any signals that seemed like I was interested; I wouldn’t prolong hugs or invite him over and put myself in a situation that he could pull moves. If he doesn’t get those hints, I would blatantly say that I wasn’t interested. (9097)

10. I feel like body language can really indicate your intentions with someone, especially regarding physical intimacy. Aside from simply telling the person you’re not interested in pursuing a romantic relationship you can not get close to them, cross your arms, avoid eye contact, be less talkative, avoid any sort of flirting, and if they do try to kiss you at the end of the date, you turn your cheek, and then say goodbye and go your separate ways.

10. If I do not feel particularly physically attracted to the person, I would tell him that I want to discontinue dating and explain to him that I feel no connection in the nicest way possible. During the date, behaviors I would exhibit showing I do not want him to become sexual such as distancing myself from him, purposely talking about things he would dislike, and try to be around a crowd and not be alone with him. (3892)

10. To tell someone I am not interested in moving forward in commitment or physically, I am open and honest. I would talk to them about how I am feeling and politely let them know that I feel as though he may have stronger feelings for me than I do him. I explain myself and ask how he is feeling about it. If he has any questions, I will do my best to answer them. I just want it to be a conversation and not a monologue.(4012)

10. When I can tell a guy wants more to happen than I do, I usually try to suggest something to do that is not romantic or is more public than intimate, so that I do not have to bluntly reject him. I really hate and feel guilty about rejecting someone who I feel is into me, so I try to subtly end the date or turn it into a situation with other friends so that the chance to initiate something is eliminated.(2955)

10. In a situation like this I think it is important to make it known that you are uninterested without being rude. I've heard from many guys that girls lead them on and then shut them down and I think it is because a lot of times girls feel too uncomfortable to openly say they're or they just like the attention they're getting from the guy but I think it's more respectful not to lead guys on whether that means ending the dates, stopping contact, etc.(7008)

10. To avoid becoming sexual with this person I would use the word “friend” a lot. “You are such a good friend to hang out with.” “I am so happy to be friends with you.” By signaling only friendship vibes through body language and conversation you can let them down easier. If this person doesn’t get the hint I would probably avoid it, try to leave as early as possible, and then not go out with them again. (8237)

10. If I were not physically attracted to a man, I would never agree to a date with him. If I did find myself in this situation, I would first try acting overemotional in order to put him in the “friend zone.” I would tell him all the dramas of my life and ask for advice to make him feel uncomfortable. If he still continued the pursuit, I would tell him that I am seeing someone else and then show him pictures of me and one of my male friends and ask him if he thinks we look cute together. If he continues to be turned on I would tell him he is creepy and call a male friend to pick me up. (6259)

  1. 10. This is difficult to do without making the guy feel bad. Sometimes I do have to explicitly say that “I am not seeing us becoming more than friends,” and then I would express how I look forward to a new friendship. Other times, and most of the time, I try to be more settle about it and passively express how I enjoy making new friends and how I don’t particularly take part in the hook-up culture. I express my conservative views on it, but then I remind them that I have friends that do that often so it’s more of just a me-issue and not an issue I have with all participants. I also become more stoic and become hyper aware of any flirtatiousness so I don’t respond to it. What’s disappointing is knowing that many guys do not trouble themselves with all of this; they typically don’t have any problem following my former methodology on this whole thing, rather than the latter (0531).

10. Once again, influence has nothing to do with physical acts. You should not have to influence someone to do or not do something physically intimate. In any matter, I would be very straight forward and honest by verbally communicating that this is not something I want to move forward in doing. Being clear and honest about it would be the best way to approach this sort of situation. 3066

10. If I was not interested in physical intimacy with a person who was interested in me, I would distance myself from them physically and emotionally. I would do this by keeping my distance from them while talking and not making as much eye contact with them. I would be sure to talk about things that would give the guy hints that I am not interested in him physically, such as emphasizing how he is such a good friend to me or is like my brother. If this didn't work, I would avoid being alone with the guy since most sexual advances will occur in privacy away from other people. (2992)

10. I would friend zone as much as possible. If he were to tell me that he wanted to take me back to his place or something along those lines, I would probably just tell him that we can be great friends, but I don’t think we are compatible. (2662)


  1. 1. I would just tell him “I have had a ton of fun, but I would like you to know that I am not really looking for a physical relationship.” Or “ I really enjoy your company but I don’t feel comfortable taking this relationship farther than it is.” Something along those lines. I think the clearer you are in these situations the less people will get hurt or embarrassed. (5369)

10. I would give off as many “Friend Zone” vibes as possible. For instance, revealing unattractive information about myself, asking for advice when it comes to other men, and offer to set him up with one of my friends. (0572)

10) I would talk to him about other guys I’m interested in and I would try to avoid any sensitive topics related to the sexual sphere. If the situation gets too awkward I would simply tell him the truth about my unreciprocated feelings towards him. (7500)

10. If this person made a move, I would pull away and make it clear I was uninterested but continue to treat him as if he had not done so to not make it awkward and be able to maintain a friendship with him. If he did not make a move the entire evening I would make sure to only hang out with him in the future in non date-like settings to make sure he understood that he was friend zoned. (8638)

10.) If I knew that I was not sexually attracted to a person I would probably steer the conversation away from anything suggestive during the date. After the date, I would let him know that I feel that we are not completely compatible and would not go out with him again. (2387)

10. I would do the opposite as previously stated and make sure we are not involed in any intimate situation. When we go out it would be to a casual, non date-type location. I would avoid a lot of direct eye contact and not act overly interested in conversation. I would attempt to avoid situations where we are completely alone such as him walking me to my car or to my door. (6996)

10. Well in my opinion if you’re dating someone for a month and still have no attraction, that’s a sign you may not be really in to the person as much as you thought. I would just let them know that I would really love to be their friend and I wouldn’t want to give them the wrong impression so I would stop going on dates with them and just start hanging out as friends. Communication is key, if the dates have been going well then there is respect for each other and I think the guy would respect the girl’s decision or vice versa. (6858)

10. I would have a talk with this person and let them know that I am not interested in pursuing a relationship. I would most likely explain to them that I don’t think we are compatible. I don’t believe in leading men on and am usually straightforward with them especially if I know they are becoming interested or attached. (1252)

10. To influence them to avoid becoming sexual I would most likely avoid touching them in any way, and slowly stop seeing them as often until we developed a platonic relationship. (8993)

10. I would make sure that we didn’t find ourselves in an intimate situation- I wouldn’t go back to his house and he wouldn’t come back to mine. I would also probably be pretty honest with him. I think honesty is a good policy, so I would probably tell him that I just wanted to be friends. (2307)

10. I have been in situations in which a guy was physically and sexually attracted to me and I didn’t hold the same feelings towards him. In fact, recently a guy asked if he wanted to be in a relationship with me or if I am dating anyone. How I dealt with the situation is to be honest with him and say to him that let’s just be friends instead of being in a serious romantic relationship. It can be hard to be honest and upfront with a guy who is physically attracted to me because you don’t want to hurt his feelings or appear “uncool” but honesty is important especially when you are dealing with guys. (5702)

10. If the date turned South but he was still into me, I would influence this person to avoid becoming sexual by acting way overly friendly and expressing how much I like him as a friend, and eventually leave the date early with an excuse. I’m not one to particularly lead someone on, but in the midst of a date, I could never be 100% upfront with a guy. I would have to tell him how I feel when we were not on the date. (2501)

  1. 10.) I would influence the person to avoid becoming sexual by not giving them any physical or emotional signals that I am interested in anything more than being friends. I would also avoid eye contact. (1324)

10. In this situation, I would make it clear that I am not feeling physically attracted by keeping the date in a friendly environment. I would do my best not too lead this person on, in a way that is not outwardly rude. If the subtle hints do not work, I would have an open and honest conversation with the person telling him that I am not interesting in him in that particular way. (8417)

10. Situation 2: Mixed signals are one of my biggest pet peeves in regards to relationships with men. If I wasn’t feeling sexually attracted I would give it one more chance, or simply tell him I just wanted to be friends. (6503)

10) I would talk about another guy in front of him and then end the date early. (1109)

10. I would keep talking to them and if they ever tried to make a physical movement, I would quickly avoid it ad start conversing with them again. Eventually if they were really persistent, I would be able to tell them I was not interested in anything more than a friendship with them as I cannot be sexual with someone that I am not attracted to and cannot pretend I can. (5908)

I would cross my arms and legs to send off the proper physical cues and eventually just tell him how I think he would be a great friend, but nothing more than that. (9031)

I would not lead them on or flirt with them in any way. I would try to minimize physical contact as much as possible and keep the goodbye short.(3651)

In order to avoid being sexual I would try to drop subtle hints at first maybe leaving our date earlier than I expected or contacting the person less. If the person was persistent I would just kindly tell them that I thought they were a nice person but I was not interested in anything physically or anything beyond friends. If the guy isn’t respective of my desires/lack of desires for intimacy then that is not a relationship that I value.(0423)

I would try to end the date as quickly as possible, and make sure nothing physical would be able to happen. If it seemed like he was still trying hard to get close, I would also tell him that I’m not interested. But I would make sure I could escape right after saying that before I told him, so there wouldn’t be an awkward car ride home or something.

Situation 2: This is a hard one for me because I really don’t like confrontation. To start I would make sure I wasn’t giving any signals to make him think I was interested. If it came to a point where he tried something, or asked to go another date, I would nicely tell him that I think we are better off friends. I would probably go into further detail about how nice he is but that the timing isn’t right (or something like that) and try really hard not to hurt his feelings. (9232)

10. I would influence this person to avoid becoming sexual by suggesting that we invite other friends to meet up with us later. I would also give him subtle hints that I am not interested in him the way that he is interested in me. However, if he were to bluntly tell me how he felt and what he desires of him, I would in return be honest with him that I am not interested in the same way. 9295

I would seem uninterested in a man’s advance by keeping my distance, and maybe keeping my arms crossed to show that I’m not open to physical contact because I am keeping to myself. I think that I would try to avoid any type of flattery and flirting towards the man as well, to show that I’m not interested.(1160)

If I was uninterested in a man who clearly felt differently than I, I would try to keep conversation completely platonic, possibly bring up other love interests or get them to talk about other girls they are interested in, or just try to remove myself from the situation to avoid any physical advances. (8077)

10. I would try to get the date over with as quickly as possible or tell them that I really enjoyed their company and that they were a great friend. I hate mixed signals or when guys get the wrong idea. (0946)

10. I would probably act oblivious to the sexual advances unless he would directly say that he wanted to take things further; at that point I would tell him that I was not interested in him that way. (7437)

10) In this case I would avoid eye contact at all costs. I would probably be looking at my phone a lot, so that it seems as though he is of no interest to me. Additionally, I would refrain from any physical contact and would try to be situated as far from him as possible, without making it seem as though I am not enjoying the date. If I am really adamant about making it clear that I was not interested in any sexual behavior, I would probably tell the guy that I wasn’t. (3886)

10. If I were in a situation such as this, I would most likely avoid any physical contact with him in order to not lead him on in any way. If he continued to attempt to become physically intimate I might just flat out tell the person that I would rather just be friends with them. (4610)

10. If I was on a date with a man who I was not physically attracted to and he was physically attracted to myself, I would make my feelings completely clear to him. I would not act flirty in any way and put off a friendly vibe rather than a sexual vibe. I would not have any physical contact with the person and would make it seem like more of a friendly hangout rather than a date.

10. If a date was going well, but I did not want to become physically intimate with the person, I would send strong friend vibe signals. I would begin talking about more generic, friendly topics, increase my distance from the person slightly, and ignore any of the signals they sent me, so that hopefully they would get the hint before the awkward moment of them making a move occurred. (8531).

I probably wouldn’t have gone on another date with a guy I am not physically attracted to so I would not lead them on, but if I was in that situation, there are a few tricks I have up my sleeve. The first would be that I had a family emergency and have my friend call me asking me to leave. The second would be to be unresponsive so that he would have to carry the conversation and want it to end. The third would be to fake sick and have him take me home. The fourth, would be honesty so that I would tell him that I had a great time with him, but I’m just not interested. (2431)

I would probably just tell them that I was not interested in them in that way to just avoid any awkward misunderstanding. (4669)

10. I would try to subtly avoid physical contact and hope that he got the hint, but if he tried to instigate anything, I would stop him and just tell him that although he's a great guy, I don't think we're the right fit romantically. (8359)

10. If I was not attracted to the person I would just try to not be engaged in conversation much and make it clear in a polite manner that I am not interested. (8436) 10. If I wanted to let someone know that I didn’t not wish to become physically intimate, I would probably just leave the date on a friendly note and then when they next asked to go out, attempt to turn it into a group outing. (6536)

10. I would keep my distance physically, especially if he tries to initiate physical contact. If the date’s going well otherwise, I’d still want to continue conversation, but I would probably end the date earlier than I normally would so as not to lead the guy on. I’d also try to steer clear of any flirtatious conversation, and if he hints that he’s very interested, then I’d be honest with him about how I was feeling. (9166)

10) I feel really bad in these types of situations. I don’t want to be mean but i like making sure that they don’t have any false expectations about us hanging out. I think its better to make your intentions clear from the very first minute. Its cruel to flirt with someone and get their hopes up if you actually don’t like them. Usually I try to keep the conversation interesting but I avoid any topic thats sexual. I usually refer to them as my friend and emphasize that word “friend” a lot. I try not to make any physical gestures that I want him to get closer to me and I make sure my clothes are covering a lot of my skin. (2321)

  1. 10 I’d be more standoffish and I’d allow awkward pauses to happen. I might even check my phone or something, as rude as that sounds. I hate hurting people’s feelings so I wouldn’t want to be straight honest with him and tell him I just wasn’t feeling it, even though in the long run I know that would probably just be better for both of us. (0497)

10. Considering I have a lot of guy friends, this situation has happened on many occasions. I often feel that it is rude to just dodge a kiss or a move. Instead, when I know that I am not into the guy, I begin acting like one of his guy friends. I give him high fives, fist pumps, pay for my own food/movie ticket, put the arm chair between us down in the movie theater, so that there is no way we could cuddle. If we are in a public space, I would flirt with the other guys around, just so he is certain that I am not flirting with him. If he assumes that he would get a goodnight kiss in front of my door, when he drops me off I say something like “thanks dude that was so much fun,” and i would walk myself to my door. (0613)

10. I would simply thank him for the date and leave. I would make no future plans to see them and act uninterested in what they had to say. Body language also helps letting the other person know you are not interested. (9164)

10. I would act friendly as usual but might mention a couple other guys in conversation and check my phone a lot. After dinner I would say something like “thanks for taking me out again, you’re such a good FRIEND.” If he tried to make a move I would be blunt and say I’m only interested in a friendship, because being vague in the interest of protecting someone’s feelings only ends up hurting them more. (7663)

10. If I was on a date with a man and I was not feeling any sort of physical attraction I would continue the date like it was a friend of mine. I would stay interested in what he was talking about and show compassion. I would make a conscious effort to not touch him physically and not laugh as often. If by the end of the date I don’t think he has gotten the hint I would have to say that I had a fun time but I’m sorry but I am just not interested. I hate to hurt people’s feelings but I understand it is better to say it ought right than to drag him along. I would finish by saying that I would love to stay friends because he is an amazing guy! (5659)

10. If I were on a date with a man and not physically attracted to him I would attempt to shut down any possibility of an intimate relationship as soon as possible. The easiest way to do this would be to make the date feel like more of a friend to friend hangout. As cold as it may be I would bring up other guys I was interested in or dating, even if they weren’t necessarily real, it would be the fastest way to send the signal that I am not very interested in him. Hopefully I had driven there on my own and would leave as soon as possible, using a friend in need as an excuse. (0735)

10. In this kind of situation I feel like it would be best to sit the person down have a discussion about the relationship. I feel that being open and honest about how you feel is always better than trying to hide how you really feel. I would tell the person that I have enjoyed getting to know them and I have enjoyed the time we have gotten to share together, but that I am not in the right place to be pursuing a serious relationship. (6617)

10. I would find it odd if I went on a few dates with a guy and didn’t find him physically attracted. Anyways, if I did go on multiple dates with a guy even if I didn’t feel attracted to him I would still try a kiss out just in case. Obviously I felt something to continue to go on dates with him, a kiss won’t hurt and that doesn’t mean it has to move to the next step. I would just say, “I’m tired and have to get up early.” (7302)

10. I would definitely keep my distance from him when we are together to prevent any closeness. If we are sitting near each other I would make sure there was space between us. I might become less talkative and smile less to seem disinterested. (7100)

First, I would avoid physical contact, other than a hug, with this person to let him know that I am not interested. I also would talk to him the way I would talk to a friend which means I would not flirt with him and I would talk about other guys so he knows that nothing further could happen. 4531

#10 I would not make too much eye contact, make myself look distracted by other things around us, cross my arms and keep to myself more, and keep conversations at the surface (movies, music, etc) and not so intimate and personal (what I look for in a relationship, etc.). (2259)

10. I would not make unnecessary eye contact and pull away from any initiated physical contact, even something as harmless as hand holding. I would keep the conversation light and as impersonal as possible. If he does not pick up on my nonverbal, I will verbally make it clear that I am not interested in going any further in the relationship or interaction, but I will do so in the most considerate way possible. If necessary, I will lie and say that I am interested in someone else, even if I am not, or that I am not interested in being in any relationship at this time, even if that is not true either. I would hope that this would hurt the guy’s feelings less. (7413)

10. I would probably start with body language cues and if it still persisted I would talk about something (other men, being disinterested in dating right now etc.) that showed I was really not interested without being direct and making them feel too awkward about it. I would try to not let it get to the point where things were getting there. (3816)

  1. I would start using the word “friend” a lot, like saying things like “You are such a good friend to me”. I would hint to the fact that I’m about to be getting really busy at work or school or something of that matter and the next few times he asked me out again I would have excuses as to why I couldn’t go. Hopefully he would then get the hint. (7407)

10) If the date has been going well but I do not feel physically attracted to him, then my number one signal to avoid becoming sexual would be crossing my arms and avoiding long periods of eye contact. If he doesn’t pick up on those signals and makes a move then I would tell him that I’m not ready to be physically intimate with him yet. (9634)

10. Situation 2: I think that I would just kind of brush off any advances that he makes. If he made more moves or talked about being intimate with me, I think that I would tell him that I wasn’t ready to get intimate with him or that I wasn’t interested in him that way, more just as a friend. I feel like in this kind of situation, being able to tell them is the most respectful thing, rather than leading him on. I think telling him that I had a great date but I am just not ready for any type of intimacy, they should respect your decision, and if they don’t then it is ultimately their loss. (0018)

10) To avoid sexual contact if I’m not attracted to the person in the same way and I can tell he is attracted to me I would tell him I’m not ready to do anything which would slow the relationship down. However, I would not completely stop talking to him. I have to take his feelings into account and slowly wind down the relationship so he gets less attached and attracted to me so it wont be as hard for him. If I start to distance myself, he will automatically start to slowly lose those feelings are realize that there is someone else better out there for him and maybe I’m just not the right one. There is always a perfect match for everyone out there.

10. This is definitely a situation experienced by many men and women. It is difficult to let someone down that you know is pursuing you. Like I previously said, communication is extremely important in a relationship. I would voice my disinterest but still take into account the person's feelings. (2775)


For each of the following sentence fragments, complete the sentence, and, if you wish, add a few more sentences to complete your thought. Do not include the sentence stem in your response--only your answer to it.

#11. In general, it seems that the opposite sex has a tendency to become "insanely" jealous when...

  1. girls have friends who are also men or if they aren’t feeling confident about their own position in life. (7407)

11. another guy is in the picture giving you attention 11.When a girl he has feelings for talks to/ is friends with other guys he does not know.(4012) 11. their girlfriend or girl that they are seeing is approached by another male who is hitting on them/flirting with them. This makes men insanely jealous because they view females as their “territory” 11. another guy hits on the woman he is interested in. (2955) 11. In general, it seems that the opposite sex has a tendency to become “insanely” jealous when their girlfriends have interest in people that do not involve their boyfriend. I have a friend who’s boyfriend becomes very jealous when she speaks to her friends on the phone while he is around. If she won't tell him who she’s talking to then he gets very irritated and has been known to read her texts. (0632)

11. you bring up other men from the past. (8237) 11. …their girlfriends have other male friends. 3066 11. …I text other guys and don’t really tell him who it is/what its about. (9097) 11. a woman flirts with his friends. (6259)

  1. 11. …other guys look at them or give them attention (0531).

11. ...other guys they view as competition are present or when they are insecure. Guys can also become "insanely" jealous when they are more likely to or have cheated because they are afraid that their girl will do the same. (2992)

11. When they think another guy is trying to hit on the girl they are dating.(2662)

11. Women say they have a boyfriend or talk to other men they find intimidating. Very often I will have guys talking to me but the second I say I have a boyfriend they either ignore me or get all defensive. (5369) 11.They run into your ex (0572)

11. They see a girl that they like talking to another guy (2501)

11) Girlfriends spend too much time or talk too much with other men. (7500)

11. … i have a lot of guy friends, especially when they do not know them (6991)

11....other men are texting their girlfriend even if it is for completely non-sexual reasons. (8638)

11.…other guys make sexual comments towards me or show persistent interest in me. (2387)

11. I am surrounded by other men that are attractive and smart. (1252)

...you talk to a male that they feel is more accomplished than them. (8993)

11. When a girl they like or their girlfriend is hitting on another guy or hanging out with family or friends over them. (5702) 11. …you are in a relationship with someone and another man hits on you. (8417)

11. Their girlfriend talks about their ex. (3651)

11.) Another man finds you attractive and is open about it. (1324)

11. ...the woman they are attracted to is initiating physical contact with other men in a non platonic manner. (6503)

11. I am out with them, but engage with other guys. (7100)

11. …they feel like they have ownership over a woman. (9166)

11. You act interested in their friends instead of them. (9232)

a girl they like is flirting with or touching at all another guy.

11. Other guys are hitting on me and flirting with me right in front of me and I’m flirting with the other guy back. Especially if the other guy is more attractive than the initial guy who is becoming “insanely” jealous (1109)

11. When they actually see another guy interested in the girl that he is interested in. 9295

I talk about another guy, or act out of the norm when in another guy’s presence. (1160)

11. their ego is threatened (5908.

you show more interest in another guy. (9031)

…there is another attractive male in the room showing their girlfriend or love interest special attention. Men seem to be extremely territorial of those they are involved with or interested in. If men see another man crossing into their territory, they seem to get extremely defensive. (8077)

..When a women is potentially interested in another guy. (0946)

11. They see other physically attractive males being flirtatious with a girl they like/are dating. (7437)

11) …other guys express that they like me in any way, especially if we are in public. (3886)

Other guys talk to me or I am getting to much positive attention. They get jealous when I am wearing something that is sexier or more revealing.(0423)

11. Another guy attempts to talk or hit on me in front of them. (4610)

11. Another guy is being flirtatious with their ‘girl’.

11. Another guy compliments his girl (8531)

11. They see the girl they like flirting with his friends (2431.

11. … I talk to a guy who has something that he wants (4669)

11. …they think you're talking to other guys or spending any time with other guys, even if they're just coworkers or study partners. (8359)

11. ...other guys try to talk to their girlfriend (8436)

11 In general, it seems that the opposite sex has a tendency to become “insanely” jealous when someone is hitting on or talking to or staring at the person they are with, like, or have a crush on. (6536)

11. … Another man hits on/is talking to his girlfriend. (2307)

11) Boys get insanely jealous when they see a guy that they find a threat talking to their girlfriend. (2321)

  1. 11 I speak to other guys or wear clothes he finds revealing (4097)

11. He sees you with another guy. This works for both boyfriends, ex-boyfriends and just friends. A boyfriend who is not secure with himself or the relationship will get insanely jealous when a girl talks to another guy, even if it is a casual conversation. An ex-boyfriend would get insanely jealous seeing his ex-girlfriend with another guy in general, because he knows that he used to have her and he lost her. As for guys who are just friends, they would get insanely jealous if the girl is not giving any attention to him and instead her attention is on another group of guys or if the girl is talking to him about another guy. (0613)

11. …I am with other close male friends. (9164)

11. their girlfriend ignores him while talking to another guy. (7663)

11. … I do better at something then them. (5659)

11. the girl gives more attention to another guy. (6858)

11. A girl gives another guy their attention (0735)

11. Other boys show any kind of interest in the girl that the guy is dating or trying to start dating. (6617)

11. I talk about how attractive anther guy is. The guy I’m usually talking to always seem to point out the negative of the guy I’m talking good about. (7302)

Other guys are flirting with me. 4531

#11 ...when you have a guy as your best friend and you have a long history of friendship with him. (2259)

11. women frequently spend time alone with another guy, even if it is for something like tutoring. Men start to think that the other guy has ulterior motives for spending so much time with her. Men also get jealous when a lot of other guys pay attention to her in general. (7413)

11. when other guys try to talk to their girl (3892)

11. I make significantly more time for my other guy or girl friends than him. (3816) 11. I am in a relationship with this guy and I am hanging out with my guy friends that he thinks likes me (2418)

11) when they see another guy flirting with you and you are seemingly flirting back and having a good time. (9634)

11. … you are talking to other people of the opposite sex. (0018)

11 ) The opposite sex becomes insanely jealous when another male attempts to talk to their girlfriend even if it is a friendly manner. It makes them feel inferior about themselves eventhough the interaction between the other two could have been completely innocent

#12. When it comes to initiating sexuality for the first time, the opposite sex...

  1. can be forceful. (7407)


  1. 1. …Should be more gentle and considerate and wait for the girl to give the OK. (9097)

12. tends to be very forward and clear with their intentions 12. gets very excited and they almost never try to stop or back out of that situation

12. should be respectful but till the initiator (5908)

12. When it comes to initiating sexuality for the first time, the opposite sex sees it as a right of passage or what makes them a man. (0632)

12. Takes the lead. Guys get closer to girls and are clear in what they want.(4012)

12. can sometimes be too forward about it. (2955)

12. should take the lead. (6259)

  1. 12. …tends to do the initiating without seeking verbal consent (0531)

12. Usually has to wait for a clear sign from the woman. Though women are not always very clear. (5369)

12. tends to be too forward or pushy (6991)

12. ...is often the initiator and are expected to initiate first. (2992)

12. usually makes the first move. (6858)

12. …usually is the first to ask or want to initiate it. 3066

12. Usually comes on pretty strong (0572) 12) Is more worried about his performance than anything else. (7500)

12. ...is always okay with accepting the most that they are offered even if they were planning on going less far. (8638)

12.) …is good at taking the lead and usually confident about it. (2387)

12. is usually respectful and sometimes more forward. (1252)

12. ...is a lot more forward. (8993)

12. is quick to jump into sexuality more so than females. This because males have a higher sex drive than females do by nature. This is why they are so obsessed with watching pornography and read playboy magazines. (5702)

Usually is the person to initiate sex.(0423)

12.) Makes it clear he wants to become physical with you(1324)

12. ...tends to need obvious confirmation of reciprocated interest, which can be frustrating. (6503)

12. Tends to be overbearing and wanting more in a faster time period than girls (2501)

12. needs to perfect their timing. (5680) 12. Is much more upfront. Males are more likely to make the first move than females.(9232)

12. Is very forward and initiates things. (3651)

12. is usually more forward.

12. Should make the first move, make sure I want them to do so, and I will definitely meet them half way. (7100)

12. Tries to get me alone with him, usually by watching a movie or something, and then initiates sexuality (1109)m

usually goes all in. Men, in my experience, are normally pretty aggressive when they want something. (9031)

12. Needs to have consent before trying anything. 9295

Tend to take the reins. (1160)

… tends to take the lead and be much more assertive. If a man wants to make sexual advances, they will more often than not just take the steps to make that happen (of course keeping in mind the consent of their female counterpart). (8077)

...must make the first move. (0946)

12. Does not usually care about commitment. In fact, it seems that often they would prefer having no strings attached. (7437)

12. is very obvious. (8237)

12) … usually does something physical to express it. (3886)

12. …is usually more willing to initiate and be more forward. (8417)

12. Needs to discuss their intents before they attempt to initiate sex. (4610)

12. Is usually more forward, men are usually the ones who make the first move and takes action on the sexual tension that is present.

12. … Usually initiates it. (2307)

12...Typically makes the first move.(2662)

12. Usually takes charge. (8531)

12. Usually more blunt about it (2431)

12. … usually igniting (4669)

12. …tends to be surprisingly cautious and conscientious. (9166)

12. ...is usually expected to make the first move. (8359)

12...is very open about it, and very soon in the relationship. (8436)

12. When it comes to initiating sexuality for the first time, the opposite sex is usually more aggressive or provocative, however this is what females seem to expect from them too. (6536)

12) Guys are usually more blunt than girls. They make their sexual intentions clear and are more willing to act to get what they want than girls (2321)

  1. 12 can be a little pushy. Sometimes I wish they wanted to hold back and I was the one that had to do the chasing. (0497)

12. is always the first to make a move, but that move should be taken with respect and comfort in mind. If the girl does not want it, then he should not force it upon her. (0613)

12. …is always very enthusiastic. (9164)

12. needs to hear an explicit “yes” before continuing. (7663)

12. … tends to push to go further than what I desire. (5659)

12. Will usually try to kiss a girl, or become much more physically affectionate. (0735)

12. Tends to be the one to initiate it. (6617)

12. Should always be the first to initiate it. As a girl I know I want it but sometimes I’m shy and scared of rejection, it’s better for the guy to take the leap of faith. (7302)

Usually initiates it. 4531

#12 When it comes to initiating sexuality for the first time, the opposite sex is more direct about it than women who throw subtle verbal language and use body language to hint at it. (2259)

12. tends to make the first move and it is usually begins with kissing. (7413)

12. generally seems to make the first move, but in my experience it has always been myself because I’ve liked shy guys. (3816) 12. Is always the first one to make a move, whether or not I give him physical or verbal cues that I am ready. (2418)

12) typically the initiator and moves too fast (9634)

12. … is more forward and aggressive. (0018)

When it comes to initiating sexuality for the first time the a guy is usually more straightforward than the girl. (4605)

#13. The opposite sex seems clueless about...

13. the way females overthink everything they say to us

  1. female emotion, communication, and cleanliness. (7407)

13. women are upset and/or mad unless they are told and they also have to be told what to do

13. Women and their emotions.(4012)

13. why we find certain statements to be disrespectful to us. (2955)

13. how a woman truly feels. (6259)

  1. 13. …the context and details within an important conversation or situation (0531).

13. ...what women want and how to give it to them. (2992)

13. Trying to hide things from women—We usually find out through personal experience or from our friends letting us know. (7100)

13. Women’s emotional thinking. Men don’t always understand why we say we are ok when we are not, why we get upset over little things etc. (5369) 3.What hurts our feelings. (0572)

13) Why women buy so many things they consider useless. (7500)

13. ...when lines should be drawn to moderate their behavior. (8638)

13. why women get upset about most of the things they get upset about, why women are so much more sensitive than they are in general (5908)

13.)…a woman’s need for detailed communication (2387)

13. about our general needs. they don't understand how to be there for someone fully or why we need someone there for us all the time.(6991)

13. The opposite sex seems clueless about women’s fears. They don’t understand why women don’t want to be “cat called.” They seem to think that women should be taking these “compliments” at the base level and do not understand the threatening undertones. (0632)

13. Relationships (2501)

13. expressing their emotions and love verbally, and picking up on emotional and social subtleties and needs. (1252)

13. The opposite sex seems clueless about how to comfort a woman who is going through a hard time. (5702)

13.) Seems clueless about women’s feelings and emotions(1324) how to properly communicate and keep in touch with their girlfriends. (5857)

how the female mind works. (9031) 13. …female bodies and what really happens with the female’s reproductive system. 3066

13. …subtle cues and when women are seeking emotional advice. (8417)

13. ...the balance between sexual interest and emotional candidness. (6503)

13. ...communication and the need for females to talk things out. (8993)

13. Importance of communication. (3651)

13. Communicating their feelings. (9232)

13) My intentions with them (1109)

12. How to read a females emotions (2662)

13. Women in general. 9295

13. women’s emotions. It also seems like they have no interest in learning more.

Emotions and reading a woman’s feelings. (1160)

… the big picture of female emotions. Men seem to want to avoid going too in depth with women emotionally and only gaining a basic understanding of women’s emotional needs. Men generally just try to have a grasp of general emotional states like happy, sad, angry as opposed to when is causing those emotions (which is the most important part to women). (8077)

Women's need to feel wanted (0946).

13. How important trust and honesty are in any relationship. (7437)

13) … feelings. (3886)

13. …when I’m upset. (9166)

13. Understanding women’s feelings and emotions. (4610)

13. How to effectively communicate with women and how to properly take into account their emotions.

13. What I want (8531)


  1. 1. …Romantic gestures and more chivalrous ways to go about things. (9097)

13. Relationships (2431)

13. … girls grooming (4669)

13. ...women's emotions. (8359)

How to talk with women about their emotions or how to be comforting. They are clueless with how to deal with us when we are upset or how to be comforting.(0423)

13.... picking up on nonverbal cues and understanding women's feelings and emotions. (8436)

13. … The necessary balance (and difference) between emotional intimacy and physical intimacy. (2307)

13. The opposite sex seems clueless about when they have said something that offends us. (6536)

13.Guys are clueless when it comes to reading girls emotions. (2321)

  1. 13 moods. If I’m being short, I’m pissed. Leave me alone for a little bit… (0497)

13. the way a woman's mind works. (0613)

13. …when I become stressed, they seem to not know why. (9164)

13. most things. (7663)

13. hygiene. (8237)

13. … my feelings. (5659) 13. taking hints from girls when we want something or are upset.(6858)

13. How to react when a girl does have an emotional moment. (0735)

13. Why women are more sensitive and why we need to talk more than a man wants to. (6617)

13. A female’s emotion. We have hormones playing around and so we are sometimes all over the place, sometimes we aren’t even sure what’s wrong. But it would be nice for a guy to just say some comforting words even when they don’t understand our ways. (7302)

Verbal communication. 4531

#13 ...picking up on sudden hints from girls when they are flirting or when they’re annoyed by something they have done. (2259)

13. what women’s nonverbal behaviors mean (7413)

13. how to deal with females when they’re in a bad mood or PMSing. (9994 13. how to deal with their emotions in a direct way/emotive way. (3816) 13. How I am feeling unless I directly tell them how I feel. They cannot pick up on subtle cues at all (2418)

13) women's emotions and how their actions affect them (9634)

13. what women really want when it comes to relationships. (0018)

A guy seems clueless about what is going on in a girls mind (4605)

#14. Being romantic is something that the opposite sex...

  1. struggles to grasp. (7407)

14. can be good at if they put in the effort 14. should do because it is very important to most women and makes women very happy when romantic things are done (3892)

14. Can sometimes be lacking. Or makes unclear.(4012)

14. is actually very good at if they choose to be. (2955)

14. should master if they want to further the relationship. (6259)

  1. 14. …doesn’t really care to give much attention to or hasn’t got a clue at what it is to their partner (0531)

14. ...can be good at if they try but often don't think they are good at. I think that guys will be more romantic with a girl that they truly care about because in cases like this, they will want to do more for her and show her how much they love her (2992).

14. Being romantic is something that the opposite sex is able to do relatively easily. Valentine’s day is very simple for example—it’s easy to be romantic by simply bringing home flowers or chocolate. Women have to get more creative. (0632)

14. should take more seriously (2662)

14. Should do more often (0572) 14. Is stereotyped at being bad at but from my experience is not true. All my male friends have been incredibly romantic and sweet to their SO’s. (5369)

does well at. They are generally the ones to ask girls out or take them out for a cute set up date, so they learn to develop and foster that romantic side of them because they know women enjoy it. (9994 14) Struggles with without understanding the real reason behind it. (7500)

14. ...views as corny and embarassing and only done to fulfill the woman's desires rather then to feel happy themeselves and to bond with their significant others. (8638)

14. Seems only serious about when they are in a relationship and not when they are single (2501)

14… does in order to get sex (6991)

14.)…does very successfully if they put the thoughtfulness and effort in. Men are generally good at being romantic through thoughtful actions rather than just words. (2387)

14. could be better at especially because I find emotional intimacy and verbal expressions of love to be romantic. (1252)

14. can be surprisingly good at if they are really into the girl, but hopeless if not (5908)

14. ...does a good job of when they feel extremely attached. (8993)

14. … Usually does at the beginning of a relationship, but stops doing as the relationship progresses. (2307)

14. The opposite sex is good at on the sexual level but lacks on the emotional level 14. either does really well, or doesn’t know anything about.

frequently misuses as a mean of getting women to sleep with them. (9031)

14.) Being romantic is something that the opposite sex doesn’t know enough about. Being Romantic isn't a one size fits all kind of thing. Each girl appreciates and values different kinds of romantic gestures. It is important for the Male to pay attention to the specific Female and not just what society tells him he should do for a girl.(1324)

14. Thinks of as something that has to be extravagent and expensive. Really, being romantic could be something small, yet thoughtful. (3651)

14. Can either be really good or bad at. For example, some men are very romantic and go out of their way to make romantic gestures, whereas others wouldn’t know romance if it hit them in the head. (9232)

14. ...generally views as daunting or unnecessary when in actuality it can be very simple and rewarding. (6503)

14. can be too cliché! (5680)

14. …Learns over time. (9097)

  1. 14....can be very good at…if they want to. (1333)

14. can do when they choose. (8237)

14. Shouldn’t be with me unless we are already exclusive (1109)

14.Has to do more of, one time just is not enough. 9295

Has to learn from a woman usually. (1160)

… struggles with unless they have a serious desire. Unless men are hoping to make a specific grand gesture, they seem to avoid romance viewing it as too complex or too much work. (8077)

...does not seem to understand. (0946)

14. Does not consider important after they have been dating a girl for a while. (7437)

14) … will utilize if they were taught to be so, or if their goal is to engage in some type of sexual activity. (3886)

14. Needs to understand that it doesn’t take a huge amount of effort or money to be romantic, small and subtle can be just as meaningful to a woman. (4610)

14. Tries to be good at, but does not always succeed.

Does less often than I personally do or than I would like.(0423)

14. …should be more confident about — usually they’re doing it right, but they don’t know it. Men are better at being romantic than they think. (9166)

14. is sometimes negligent about (8531)

14. They act like they hate, but actually crave it (2431)

14. … does well

14. ...usually thinks of in the stereotypical way with flowers, chocolates, etc., but romance should really be based more on the individual. (8359)

14... has trouble understanding and doing (8436)

14. Being romantic is something that the opposite sex knows about and knows how to be but are sometimes too lazy to become. (6536)

14. guys are romantic when they want something or are really trying to impress a girl but this usually dies off. (2321)

  1. 14 overthinks. It doesn’t need to be grand gestures of love. The little things speak enormously, at least in my book. (0497)

14. tries to do, but often fails. (which is fine, because at least they try!) (0613)

14. …doesn’t pretend to like but actually enjoys a lot. (9164)

14….is capable of, but is usually done only because a woman accuses a man of not being romantic enough on their own. (8417)

14. is very good at when he decides a specific girl is worth showing his feelings for. (7663)

14. … doesn’t have naturally. It just takes them a little more effort to achieve the same goal as women. (5659)

14. …thinks is stupid but does it anyways because female’s like romance. 3066

14. either is really good at or really bad at.(6858)

14. must put an effort into, but both sexes should be putting effort. (0735)

14. Often needs to learn to be better at (6617)

14. Should improve upon. Our generation has become obsessed with the “hook up culture.” Girls still appreciate romance. (7100)

14. Don’t do very often. It’s like they do it in the beginning of the relationship and stop after a year. (7302)

Can do really well and should continue to do. 4531

#14 Being romantic is something that the opposite sex can either succeed or fail at achieving. Some guys enjoy taking time to plan special dates and some just see a relationship as an extension of a deep friendship and feel they don’t have to go out of their way to male romantic gestures (2259)

14. finds less important, but knows that it is more important to most women. This is why men try to be romantic, especially in the beginning of a relationship. (7413)

14. can do just as well and frequently as women, but it really depends on their love language. (3816)

14. Feels a little wary about, unless they have conformation that being romantic is a good thing and not just something girls do. (2418)

14) avoids unless they are truly committed to the relationship and in love (9634) 14. ...can be good at if they really wanted to (0018)

1) being romantic is something that the opposite sex does to get what he wants. (4605)

#15. Sometimes it seems that the opposite sex puts their boyfriend/girlfriend through a series of relationship "tests" by...

  1. seeing how you interact with their friends or seeing how you do with one their favorite activities (like camping). (7407)

15. talking about other people of opposite sex 15. creating fake scenarios and lying about something purposely to see how their partner will react (3892)

15. Meeting their friends. Guys want to make sure their friends like his girlfriend.(4012)

15. acting like they don't care about arguments. (2955)

15. having a “boys night” when it was supposed to be date night to see how jealous or angry she will be. (6259)

  1. 15. Flirting with other girls to see the boundaries and jealousy of the girlfriend (0531)

15. ...making the potential girlfriend chase after them and now know how they truly feel before settling down. (2992).

15. I really have never seen boyfriends do this in real life. (5369) 15) Sending mixed signals. (7500)

15. Sometimes it seems that the opposite sex puts their girlfriends through a series of tests by testing to see how available a woman makes herself to the man (calling/texting at weird hours). If a guy wants to see if their girlfriend is “too clingy” he’ll test out how she reacts to being ignored. (0632)

15. holding grudges and expecting more reciprocation than they deserve. (8237)

15. ...seeing how often and to what extent they can get their way before their girlfriend picks a fight with them. (8638)

15. invoking jealousy or fishing for compliments/assurance. (1252)

15. introducing her to his friends without warning.(2662)

15. ...hanging out with other girls and becoming a little harder to make plans with. (8993) 15. By flirting with other girls or sending text messages saying that “you’re not spending enough time with me” or “I miss you” when you just saw them yesterday. (5702)

15. … seeing how much they can get away with and gaging how upset their girlfriend will get. (6991)

15. ...keeping interaction to a minimal level at first to act as if they’re maintaining their “independence.” (6503)

15. Seeing how much control they have in the relationship. (0572)

  1. 15....seeing how they react when another man is flirting with them. (1333)

15. Wanting them to hangout on their own terms, and if the girl has other plans, the guy tends to make them feel bad/guilty (2501)

15. Seeing how they act around their close friends. (9232)

15.)…deliberately not communicating with them regularly to make sure they are not too needy (2387)

15. …asking questions about previous relationships, seeing how they respond to things, and talking about honesty and trust. 3066

15. flirting with other girls, trying to get out of dates, avoiding meeting the parents.

15. Seeing how far they can go in general before getting a reaction. (3651)

15. Testing them in whatever way they see fit. If something is lacking in the relationship that he wants, he may initiate a test in that area without telling the girl it is a test. If she fails the test, the guy might not say anything. I don’t really know if this is true. (1109)

intentionally making them jealous and by making it a point that their friends come first. (9031)

15. Saying/doing things just to see what type of reaction that they will get from us. 9295


  1. 1. … Seeing if they will text you first, pay for dinner, remember the anniversaries. (9097)

the workplace, professional sports, and household chores. (9031)

15. Seeing if they fit in with their friends, finding out if they are high maintenance, introducing them to parents or relatives and watching their reaction. (7100)

Flirting with other girls to see if we will respond irrationally out of jealousy, and to see if we trust them. (1160)

… testing their boundaries. It seems like when entering a relationship men need to be aware of their boundaries – sexually, with how much they can still relate to other women, how much time they can still spend with their friends, etc. (8077)

...pushing their limits with what is acceptable behavior (0946).

15. flirting with other girls to se if the girl they are interested in gets jealous so they can be reassured she likes him or that he affects her (5908)

15. Cheating on them to see if the girl/woman will forgive them and remain faithful and loyal. (7437)

15) … trying to test their fidelity. Many times it happen in the form of going through a phone or social media site. (3886)

15. Seeing how the person reacts to them flirting with other girls. (4610)

15. Evoking certain situations to happen, in order to see their partner’s reaction and response.

15. pulling away from time to time (8531)

I do not agree(0423) 15. Asking if they are attracted to other guys (2431)

15 … pulling away and see how you respond (4669)

15. …seeing how far they can get with them before deciding whether or not they are relationship material. (8359)

15...not being completely open about how they feel to see if their partner is able to understand them without them having to tell them so. (8436)

15. …complaining about negative things other people do and seeing how we react. (9166)

15. … Evoking certain situations and seeing their partner’s reaction. (2307)

15. Sometimes it seems that the opposite sex puts their boyfriend/girlfriend through a series of relationship “tests” by threatening to break up with them and getting angry for trivial reasons to see how they’ll react. (6536)

15. Girls will totally test their boyfriends in situations to see how they react and to see if they approve of how they react. They will do this by saying something or putting them in a situation that may make them uncomfortable or seems harmless but is a really big deal. (2321)

  1. 15 ignoring them and seeing if she will fight for his attention.(0497)

15. hanging out with friends who are girls to see how she handles jealousy. (7663)

15. giving her the cold shoulder and seeing if she makes an effort to reach out-it shows him how much she cares. Or he would introduce her to his family and leave her with his mom or sisters and see how she carries herself. (0613)

15. ...introducing her to “the boys” unexpectedly. (9164)

15. …seeing if they are able to hang out with “the guys.” (8417)

15. … doing something to see how I will react. (5659)

15. acting like they don’t care or won’t respond quickly to see if they really care. (6858)

15. pushing my limits to see what I’m okay with, rather than simply asking. (0735)

15. Trying to get out of serious discussions about the relationship (6617)

15. I’m not sure if I can answer this one since I can’t think of anything at the moment. (7302)

Seeing how well they interact with their family and friends. 4531

#15 Sometimes it seems that the opposite sex puts their boyfriend/girlfriend through a series of relationship “tests” by asking them how they feel about a certain topic by asking her to react to a similar scenario. They might also go for doing little things for dates like staying in and watching television or playing video games to see if they are able to be comfortable and happy together when there isn’t any real entertainment or action happening around them, such as going to a show or theme park. (2259)

15. having her meet his friends and having her participate in activities he likes. It is important for men to see if their girlfriend and friends can get along and be civil with each other. By having her join him in his favorite activities, it shows her willingness to try new things and be accepting of different interests they may have. (7413)

15. asking their friends to flirt with a girl to see how she reacts and if she flirts back. (9994)

15. I’ve never really felt tested by my boyfriends to be honest, haha. (3816) 15. Seeing if she hits on any of his guy friends or allows herself to be hit on by his friends or other men in person or social media, etc. (2418)

15) having them hangout with his friends to see what they think of her (9634)

15. … asking them to fulfill certain favors or asking them to take their relationship to the next step. (0018)

Sometimes it seems that the a guy puts their girlfriend through a series of relationship “test” by putting their wealth aside to make sure the girl likes him for him (4605)

#16. The opposite sex seems to support equality for the sexes except when it comes to...

  1. household duties, competing for job positions, and “who wears the pants in the relationship”. (7407)

16. equal pay, reproductive rights, sexual assault 16. sex, cleaning, sports, and cooking (3892)

16. Their own pride. If a woman is hurting a man’s pride, then it seems to be a problem. Such as if a woman was better at a job that he believed he was better at.(4012)

16. anything that they feel would threaten their 'manhood'. (2955)

16. The opposite seems to support equality for the sexes except when it comes to traditional gender roles. Men still want to be the bread-winner, have their wives raise the children and have dinner on the table. I find it ironic when a man wants him and his wife to be equal with high paying jobs, but expects her to quit or take a smaller role at work if they have a child. (0632)

16. equal pay. (6259)

  1. 16. …covering for dinner or outings (0531)

16. ...doing things for the home. I think that the majority of men still think that women should be the ones to cook and clean in the house. (2992)

16. Women health care (in politics), and all forms of media. Women’s health care being the numerous battles over abortion legality, birth control, even women health issues like ovarian cancer. Media referring to, for example, the constant display of women’s bodies to sell things or the portrayal of women in movies, TV shows, video games and other forms as personality lacking objects with boobs, or as flat characters with only sexuality as a trait. (5369) 16. sports (0572) 16) Cleaning the house, cooking, doing the laundry... (7500)

16. ... having sex with others. Females having a higher number is viewed as bad or "slutty" while men having a higher number is seen as okay and a measure of their attractiveness. (8638)

16.)…athletic situations. Many men seem to laugh off women sports as a joke and don’t take them as seriously as male sporting events. (2387)

16. stopping sexual objectification and being more sensitive about consent and respectful sexual behavior. (1252)

16. ...paying for dinner. (8993)

16. …talking about feminism because they say they believe in gender equality but not feminism. When in reality, if you even knew what you were talking about in the first place, you’d know that feminism is gender equality. 3066

16. sports newscasting. (8237)

16. equal pay (5908)

16. objectifying women (6991)

16. … Double standards; men tend to get worked up when another guy talks to his significant other, but if a women gets worked up about another woman talking to her significant other, men call them jealous and clingy. (2307)

16. Making financial decisions because men think we’re not objective or responsible enough with our finances (5702). 16. Household upkeep. (9232) 16. Strippers and sluts (1109) 16. Sleeping around or talking to people of the opposite sex. (3651) 16. working and sex. I think guys still feel a need to be dominant in the workplace and in the bedroom. 16. Jobs. 9295

Sleeping around (1160)

… serving their domestic needs. Men have only known a life that is served by women. Men grow up in the comfort of a home where their mothers serve them, they then move onto relationships with that same expectation. It is very rare to find a man who is completely self-sufficient domestically. (8077)

...jobs, there are still fields heavily dominated by men. (0946)

16. Doing household chores. Boys/Men will try to get out of doing all household chores completely but if the female is insistent then they assist in some way they will only do “manly chores” like taking out the garbage, washing the cars, fixing appliances, etc. (7437)

16. The business world (2501)

16) … sports. (3886)

16. Who has to do the dishes(2662)

16. Female stereotypes and double standards. (4610)

16. Housework and chores.

Women who are more intelligent than them and how become a threat.(0423)

16. Sex (8531)

16. Jobs that men typically have such as police officers or CEOs (2431)

16. …they want you to cook (4669

16. ...housework like cooking and cleaning. (8359)

16...work environment and what type of jobs belong to whom (8436)

  1. …positions of power and/or authority (women tend to be perceived as a "bitch" if they assert an authoritative position, particularly in the workplace). (9166

16. The opposite sex seems to support equality for the sexes except when it comes to video games, running the country, and I think some men still might feel uncomfortable having women as bosses. (6536)

16. Sometimes sexual issues have a double standard. A guy can have sex with many girls and be praised whereas the girl would be considered a slut. (2321)

  1. 16 paying for meals. I know it’s a weirder thing to complain about, but this bothers me. Also driving. I CAN drive a car, you know. (0497)

16. equality in the relationship dynamic, in the household (roles) and in the corporate world. They always assume that they wear the pants in the relationship since they are male. They come home and expect the woman to have the dinner set, the woman to wash the dishes, clean the house and do laundry. (0613)

16. …house work. (9164)

16. …domestic chores or taking care of children. (8417)


  1. 1. …Women making more money or men staying at home while the woman works. (9097)

16. number of sexual partners. (7663)

16. … career aspirations. (5659) 16. jobs, sports, money, and handy work.(6858)

16. sportsand money (9994)

16. Power. I think men feel like they have to assert some sort of power over women. This may just be that their opinion is superior to a woman’s opinion. (7100)

16. pay rate, being a stay at home parent, losing a physical competition (0735)

16. The word “Feminism” because they feel that all “Feminists” are automatically “man-haters” (6617)

16. Leadership roles. For some reason it seems like guys don’t feel comfortable having a woman in charge of them. (7302)

Sex itself. Men can have more sex than women and be viewed as awesome while women are viewed as sluts. 4531

#16 the opposite sex seems to support equality for the sexes except when it comes to sexual assault on women. They might think it was their fault and they were asking to be attacked because of their promiscuity. (2259)

16. the appropriateness of women saying vulgar things or joking around in the same way that men do in their group of guy friends. Most men think that this is not “lady-like” and would prefer that they did not act like “one of the guys.” (7413) 16. female stereotypes and power in the workplace. (3816) 16. Equal pay, equal job opportunities, STEM in schools, and hair all over the body (2418)

16) sports and appearances (9634)

16. ...domesticity (0018)

A guy seems to support equality for the sexes except when it comes to driving (4605)

#17. Possessiveness is something that the opposite sex...

  1. is always claiming. I’m not sure if men realize yet that women do not like to be identified as your object to own. (7407)

17. is just as guilty of 17. should not do/ have that attribute (3892) 17. is more likely to be physical about compared to women (5908) 17. Does often when it pertains to girls. These girls can be their sisters, girlfriends/wives, and friends who are girls.(4012)

17. seems to either have an extreme amount of or none at all. (2955)

17. only displays when there are other men present. (6259)

  1. 17. …either partakes in seriously or is apathetic towards(0531)

17. ...can have over someone when they are insecure or jealous. (2992).

17. is too important to many guys. A relationship should be more of a partnership than ownership(2662)

17. Tends to display when it comes to their girlfriends, and other things that are important to them. (5369) 17. Has a lot of (0572)

17) Struggles with. (7500)

17. struggles with. Men are generally very possessive of their girlfriends and in a sense can treat them like their own property. Their possessiveness can lead them to be very controlling as well , telling the girl who she can and can’t talk to. (9994)

17. Seem to have when they are in a relationship and on't have enough confidence in their relationship (2501)

17. … shows greatly depending on the guy (6991)

17. ...display in different degrees but is usually quite intense when men have a lot of insecurity and trust issues. ( (8638)

17.)…should be more aware of. I think males have a natural inclination to be possessive of a significant other, but that this inclination can sometimes turn into an unhealthy and controlling situation.(2387)

17. may or may not have over their partner.(1252)

17. ...can take too far in relationships. (8993)

17. ...either embodies or doesn’t. I don’t think possessiveness is an innate quality in either men or women, and is instead quite subjective to different personalities or specific situations. (6503)

17. Is good at in a romantic relationship. (5702)

17. Can seem to have over their girlfriends, but not always. I would say it’s more about protectiveness. (7100)

seems to get very irritated by. I have heard many guys complain that clinginess and possessiveness are some of the most annoying traits women have. (9031)

17. Possessiveness is something that the opposite sex is more likely to display. They want their girlfriend to be theirs completely and are easily upset when they see another man approach “their girl.” (0632)

17. isn’t quite as guilty of.

17. … Does to a fault; it is so unattractive when a man treats his significant other like their property. (2307)

17. that is healthy to an extent. (5680)

17. Takes seriously while in the relationship, and doesn’t care about once the relationship is over. (9232) 17. Needs to have under moderation. (3651)

17. needs to relax on. Some guys can get way too possessive over the girl they are talking to. (7163)

17. Can sometime exhibit if they are insecure and think they are with a girl that is out of their league (1109)

17. Sometimes needs to control, it is not a bad thing to be possessive but do not get overly possessive to the point that it causes aggression. 9295

Can sometimes struggle with if they don’t feel secure in the relationship. (1160)

… seems to truly struggle with. Men become extremely territorial over women that they are involved with or romantically interested in which can become a bit suffocating. (8077)

Often is. The opposite sex is often possessive and I feel as if I am a trophy to show off to other people.(0423)

17. …does often when they have girlfriends. 3066 ...is equally as guilty of as women. (0946)

17. Disguises as just being protective. (7437)

17. …may definitely feel over their partner. (9166)

17) … often engages in when they have a long term relationship with someone. (3886)

17. Exhibits when they truly care about the person. (4610)

17. Can be overcome by, or can contain it to a healthy extent.


  1. 1. …Has depending on his inner security. (9097)

17. Experiences frequently (8531)

17. Is extremely prone to have (2431)

17. … sometimes takes too far (4669)

17. ...usually has a lot of. (8359)

17....that is extremely unattractive and shows their insecurity. (8436)

17. Possessiveness is something that the opposite sex does a lot of especially when it comes to women. (6536)

17.guys get possessive if they are insecure and feel like they may lose their girl. (2321)

  1. 17 needs to ease up on. I’m not an object, I’m a person. (0497)

17. experiences often, even if it without realizing. (0613)

17. …has a lot of. Boys just seem to be so carefree. (9164)

17. definitely has. (8237)

17. …can be too serious about and can often lead to more harm then good. (8417)

17. needs to realize is not the same thing as love. (7663)

17. … can do but does not show it the same way women do. (5659) 17. usually engages in when they are insecure or fear they might lose them.(6858)

17. is guilty of more often than not. (0735)

17. Needs to know that they are very guilty of. Especially if a girl has other guy friends the boyfriend will often get extremely possessive whenever she is spending time with them. (6617)

17. Is not as aggressive as females. (7302)

Is known for. 4531

#17 Possessiveness is something that the opposite sex doesn’t seem to wound up in. They’re do have their moments of jealousy but that’s only normal. (2259)

17. has a greater tendency to exhibit and may be expressed through controlling behaviors. (7413) 17. Does when he is very insecure and does not know how to fix himself (2418)

17) exemplifies because they can be territorial (9634)

17. … tends to have, and could later be dangerous. (0018)

Possesivness is something that the a guy has a lot of (4605)

#18. When it comes to physical attractiveness, the opposite sex...

  1. can always pull that off. (7407)

18. highly values it (3892)

18. is more athletically attractive overall (5908)

18. Can vary. Since guys usually are low-maintenance, they are very honest in who they are.(4012)

18. can be harsh and unrealistic when it comes to what they want in women. (2955)

  1. 18. Suddenly becomes attentive to detail and pretty judgmental (0531)

18. ...values it more in their mate than females. I once heard that relationships work out better when the woman is viewed as more attractive than the man because then the man will remain more interested in the woman. If the man is more attractive than the woman, he will think that he can do better than the woman he is with and will become disinterested or cheat. (2992)

#18. When it comes to physical attractiveness, the opposite sex... 18. should look as manly as possible. (6259) 18. Is generally seen as less attractive then women. (5369) 18. Finds it very important (0572)

18) Places too much importance on it. (7500)

18. ...men will disregard if they really want to get laid but hold into high accountability if they are to date someone. (8638)

18. When it comes to physical attractiveness, the opposite sex is expected to be strong, physically fit and clean. The closer they are to the “superman” stereotype the better. (0632)

18. sometimes cares about their appearance and other times does not. Sometimes they expect women to look their best while not thinking they have to try at all.(1252)

18. ...is very particular with standards. (8993)

18. feels that is important to them especially if a guy has a girlfriend (5702)

18. ...is more willing to admit it is a major factor in forming relationships. I often find women try to play it off as a less important, but nice benefit, while in actuality a relationship will not last if one is not physically attracted to one’s significant other. (6503)

18. should all play water polo. (5680)

18. …doesn’t have to do much to be attractive, such as accessorize or put on make-up. 3066

18. is less particular when it comes to a specific type (6991)

18. is the first thing that they look for in women, while men work less on their physical appearance. (6553)

18.…shouldn’t worry too much about their looks. I don’t find myself finding many guys unattractive, as long as they look as though they are healthy and take care of themselves (2387).

18. …does not need to try too hard to be attractive. Unlike girls. (2541) 18. Makes it a priority when picking a mate. (9232)

18. Doesn't have to try nearly as hard as we do. (2662)

places a lot of importance in how women look. (9031)

18. Have very high standards of women. (3651)

18. Tends to let it take precedence over their personality (2501).

18. seems to be fixated on this (1109)

18. often thinks this is a determining factor of a relationship.

18.Needs to be less picky or at least show that shape does not matter. 9295

Look for physical attractiveness before anything else. (1160)

…Is completely shallow. It seems that the hierarchy of importance to men is body first, face second, personality third. (8077)

...acknowledges how important it is to them, probably more than they should. Women do not like to be seen as objects. (0946)

18. Tends to get off easy. Men who have a great personality or wealth/prestige can get a woman who is much more attractive than them, but the opposite is rarely true. (7437)

18) … catches my attention. (3886)

Is very attractive for the most part?(0423)

18. …tends to misunderstand what women are physically attracted to — there’s a lot of variation. (9166)

18. Tends to obsess and fixate on too much. (4610)

18. Is open to the importance of it when finding a suitable partner.

18. prioritizes that (8531)

18. Is a good first impression (2431)

18. … values it more. (4669)

18. ...Tend to give a woman a number rather than an attribute; for example, she’s a 10 rather than she is beautiful. (2307)

18. Is very attractive. I like their broad shoulders, their harsh jaw lines, and their eyes. I don’t think a guy needs to be super muscular to be attractive. (7100)

18. ...puts too much emphasis on it in women. (8359)

18...makes it more of a priority but I think this is true for both sexes. (8436)

18. When it comes to physical attractiveness, the opposite sex relies on their god given features and generally doesn’t put as much thought into picking out an outfit. 18. guys take physical attractiveness to have a lot of weight in deciding whether to date a girl or not. (2321)

  1. 18 has to be tall and muscular. I also appreciate pretty eyes and good teeth. And personal hygiene is a must.(0497)

18. often focuses on and makes use to decide if a girl is "decent looking." If a girl is not good looking, they often say that they won't want to waste their time going for a "4" when they can put in that time getting a "9." (0613)

18. …cares a lot about how girls look but not how they themselves are dressed. (9164)

18. can clean up well. (8237)

18. …men have a particular type of women they like and also hold women to very high standards. (8417)

18. doesn't try as hard. (7663)

18. … cares more about it. (5659) 18. uses that as a basis to find potential partners and they focus on the boobs and butt more than anything else.(6858)

18. tries to make their physique as the majority of their first impression (0735)

18. Cares about it too much in females and not enough in themselves. (6617)


  1. 1. …Deems that to be one of the main factors. (9097)

18. Doesn’t always have to be cookie cutter perfect. In fact just because I find somebody attractive doesn’t mean someone else will. For me most of the time others don’t and I’m okay with that. (7302)

Expects a lot from women. 4531

#18 When it comes to physical attractiveness, the opposite sex have less to worry about. There is less pressure for them to meet a certain body type and what hairstyle or makeup would make them appear more attractive to not just a potential partner but also herself and others. (2259)

18. seems to give this factor greater weight when evaluating a potential partner compared to the weight women place on physical attractiveness. (7413)

men can be shallow. They had a certain mold of what female beauty is and a large focus of that is on the girl’s boobs and butt. (9994)

18. tends to see more physical appearance and traits then emotional characteristics

18. doesn’t have to try as hard as we do. (3816) 18. Pays less attention to it than women do. Women seem to see their beauty more so than guys tend to see their handsomeness (2418)

18) doesn't have to try as hard (9634)

18. … tends to look at the level of attractiveness before personality. (0018)

When it comes to physical attractiveness the a guy focuses on a girls figure, smile and eyes (4605)

#19. Money and status is are things that the opposite sex...

  1. doesn’t care enough about. Sometimes it seems that men would be happy living in a box as long as they had sex and food. They could maybe strive for more. (7407)

19. should have (3892)

19.Work hard towards. It is the man’s ambitious nature to be successful that leads them to wanting more power, money, and status(4012)

19. strive for. (2955)

19. …feel pressured to successfully and highly achieve (0531)

19. …care about but not in a greedy way. It is more about being financially stable in the near future. 3066

19. ...do not care as much about in their partners as women do. Women as a whole care more about the social status and amount of money that their male partner has more than men do in their female partners. (2992)

  1. 19. Money and status is are things that the opposite sex...

19. Tend to strive for (0572)

19) Finds really important for his success and respectability as a man in life. (7500)

19. Money and status are things that the opposite sex is very preoccupied with. The man is expected to be the breadwinner of the family and his status is often associated with how much of a “man” he is. (0632)

19. ...is usually evaluated on rather then cares about as has been established by the gender role stereotypes of men being the moneymakers. (8638)

19. Are attracted to. (2662)

19.)…seems to value at certain times in their life more than others. I think men feel a certain pressure to provide for a family and so money and status are very important to them when they are young adults. (2387)

19. seem to be concerned more than family, while many women are taught to consider their family first before their career.(1252)

19. holds of great importance especially when try to please a girl (5702).

20.) Should have later in life, but not important in the age range of 20-30

19. value in general and have more expectations of stereotypically (5908)

19. ...is taught to strive for by society. It is true that many women do respect and are attracted to financially independent men, however placing work above the relationship would be a more serious fault. (6503

19. use to seduce women. (6259)

19. Is stereotypically seen as needing in order to score a pretty girlfriend or wife. But in reality is just a perk to a relationship, not a requirement. (5369)

19. ...care about a lot when impressing a girl. (8993)

19. are incredibly focused and obsessed with. Their self worth comes from being powerful and having good status as well as being able to provide for themselves and their families. (9994)

19. Craves more as they get older, and become overly ambitious to achieve the money and status they want (2501).

19. … don't seem too invested in. in our age range, status means more to them than money (6991)

19. cares too much about; women like attention above money and status. (5680)

19. Strive to achieve. (9232)

19. constantly strives for.

19.Should care about, but not too much. (3651)

19. doesn't really care if i have (1109)

19. becomes more attractive when they possess. (8237)

19.Tend to care about a lot. 9295

Use to feel more secure about themselves. (1160)

strive toward and show off. (9031)

… seem to value as much as women do. It seems that men value this more in reference to their career and their desire to be able to serve women and provide for them while for women it seems to hold a more materialistic emphasis. (8077)

... Struggle with. I believe men are almost obsessed with being successful, to the point that it can harm their relationships. (0946)

19. Can acquire in order to improve their chances of finding a mate. (7437)

19) … tend to have over women. (3886)

19. Uses to boast their own ego and becomes intimidated when a woman exhibits them. (4610)

19. Strive to attain in order to become a more desirable and suitable partner.

19. Strives for (8531)

Are concerned with obtaining more so than the women are.(0423)

19. Seems obsessed with having (2431)

19. …values more (4669)

19. …strive for because society teaches them that they won't get a girl otherwise. (8359)

19... should have goals to achieve for the sake of their future not to woo girls. (8436)

19. Money and status are things the opposite sex should strive for as well as the female sex. ( 6536)


19) Guys like to have money and status but I think they can be threatened by a girl that has more than they have to give to the relationship. (2321)

  1. 19 takes too seriously. I really do believe happiness comes from being surrounded by those you love, and having their approval. Nobody else’s opinion really matters. (0497)

19. values. However, I believe that men that value money and status are those who have earned it themselves. Those guys who value money, just become of its material worth and how it makes them look to others are shallow and not worth one’s time. In addition, money and status become intimidating to a man, if a woman is the individual who attains them. (0613)

19. …does care about but not to the extent that girls do. (9164)

19. … Should strive for, but shouldn’t be defined by. (2307)


  1. 1. …Doesn’t seem as important as if the woman was viewing the man. (9097)

Should be aware of, but not let consume their life. If they flaunt their money or status it is a huge turn off. (7100)

19. …care about, but during different stages in their lives. (8417)

19. can obtain in the work place easier than women. (7663)

19. … puts more effort into. (5659)

19. usually posses and we as women like to look for in a male.(6858)

19. use to rate their happiness and success. (0735)

19. Care FAR too much about. (6617)

19. …should encourage women to strive for, too. (9166)

19. Think highly of it. I feel like the males want to be able to support the females but females don’t really want support/money from the males. (7302)

Feel like they should have in order to impress a woman. 4531

#19 Money and status are things that the opposite sex can attain easier than women because of society’s restraints on women in work payment and executive positions. (2259)

19. strives for because they know that women find this attractive. (7413)

19. places less of an importance on when it comes to picking a partner, but regard highly when it comes to themselves. 19. is often associated with. (3816) 19. Prides himself over and is the defining factor of success. (2418)

19) feel pressure to have (9634)

19. … value. (0018)

money and status are things that men do not value as much as woman do (4605)

#20. It hurts me most when the opposite sex..

Lies and does not respect me. (9745)

  1. ignores me.

20. is not there emotionally for me and does not take action when they know I am upset (3892)

20. When I feel lied or betrayed by. This usually happens when I am confused about how/what they are thinking.(4012)

20. acts like girls are dramatic and too sensitive. (2955)

20. ...does not value what I am feeling or care about. (2992) . 20. ignores me. (6259) 20. Sees nothing but women’s looks or gender. To often females are discounted simply because they are females. (5369) 20. objectifies women (0572)

20) Ignores me when I need him the most. (7500)

20. ...lead me on in complete disregard to my feelings. (8638)

20. …don’t listen to what females have to say, or think of them as bitches if they speak up about what they believe in. 3066

20…doubts my ability to succeed in something just because of my gender. Whether in academia or in other activities, I don’t like to feel like men expect me to perform badly at some tasks just because of stereotypes. (2387)

20. treat women as inferior and objectify them. (1252)

20. Only values a woman based on her looks (2662)

20. … makes me feel like i'm not worth their time or feelings (6991)

20. ...blows things off thinking they aren’t a big deal when they are. (8993)

20. is brutally honest and hurts my feelings 20. Lies. (9232)

20. ...doesn’t acknowledge the need for mundane communication. Communication of emotions is important at times, but the general interest in how the other person’s day has gone is also very important and gratifying. (6503)

20. doesn’t console me after we argue. (5680) #20....doesn’t realize the importance of authenticity in communication. (1333)

20. Uses me for sex (although I do that to them.. how ironic) (1109)

20. Does not realize that their actions and words can really affect a person. 9295

treats women as objects instead of people. (9031)

20. Stop talking to you after they get what they want. (3651)

20. Disrespects myself or my friends and has no empathy to show towards the situation (2501)

20. objectify women so much. There is more to women than a body. Can’t understand the point I am trying to get across no matter how many times or ways I try to say it. (1160)

… fails to understand the importance of communication or try to be more communicative. (8077)

...is distant. Talking about what is going on in their lives will make them feel better.

20. Insinuates, or directly says, that women who have become successful must have performed a lot of sexual favors to get to the position they are in, as if they could not have done it through pure hard work and dedication. (7437)

20. is completely inconsiderate about a girl's feelings (5908)

20. lies. (8237)

Call women to come over at night for a “booty call.” (7100)

20)… talks in a vulgar way about other women. (3886)

20. Refers to women as objects. (4610).

Insults women, makes jokes about rape, or talks about women as if they are just items and numbers. When men do not respect women as people it makes me very upset. (0423)

20. … Doesn’t think about how their actions and words affect others. (2307)

20. Closes off, and does not communicate.

20. Lies (8531).

20. Belittles women or treats them as objects (2431)

20. … treats me like I am less than because I am a women (4669)

20. ...is inconsiderate and oblivious to how their actions affect others. (8359)

20...is lacking communication skills and puts up walls instead of discussing relationships issues. (8436)

20. It hurts me most when the opposite sex attributes certain traits, behaviors, etc. to all women in general. (6536)

  1. 20 ignores me. I don’t know if it’s a test or if they are actually just not thinking of me. Either way it hurts. (0497)

20. lies, acts like they don’t care, is ashamed or won’t put a label on our relationship (if we so act like we are dating)(6858)

20. act like they care less about me around their friends to prevent seeming “whipped” (0735)

20. Only cares about sex in a relationship or treat women as sexual conquests and not as human beings. (6617)

20. Use me for their own wants and needs and pushes me to the side once they get what they want. (7302)

Thinks I am less than they are because I am a woman. 4531

20. ... makes demeaning comments about women. It doesn’t feel great to be scrutinized/see other women being scrutinized — society tells us to be self-conscious enough already. (9166)

#20 It hurts me most when the opposite sex actually go out of their way to talk bad about girls they may have some troubles with and talk about how they’re “sluts.” I remember I was near a group of boys when they were doing this and it was shocking. (2259)

20…Doesn’t feel the need to commit or label us. (9097)

20. objectifies women or judges women based upon their physical attributes. (7413) 20. plays games and leads you on with malicious intentions 20. objectifies women. (3816) 20. Doesn’t see that he doesn’t have to put me down because I am a woman, to make himself seem like more of a man.

20) objectifies me (9634)

20. ... takes you for granted/doesn’t respect you. (0018)

it hurts me most when a guy is not loyal (4605)

#21. I feel best about the opposite sex when...

They are understanding,trustworthy, respectful, and are open to my opinions. (9745) 21. …They are clear about things and are honest about personal problems. (9097) 21. they respect, care, and appreciate me, take me seriously, value me, listen to me, give me attention, do romantic things, give me flowers, love my dogs, and are honest. (3892)

21. They treat me as an equal and are interested in what I have to say.(4012)

21. I can tell he is being genuine with me. (2955)

21. they give me positive yet genuine attention that’s not just expressed through sexuality. –(9994) 21. We are completely comfortable sharing anything around each other and we aren’t afraid to be our full selves. (7100)

21. surrounded by a group of male friends who treat me as their equal. (6259)

  1. 21. …they are actually nurturing and comforting, not patronizing or dismissive; also when they're very attentive and loving (0531)

21. ...they treat me well, make me laugh, and break negative gender stereotypes. (2992)

21) They are giving me the attentions I need. (7500)

21. ...They treat you like a princess who has earned utmost respect and treatment, not an objectified trophy. (8638)

21.) …they make me laugh. I think humor is a great way to deal with negative situations in life and men are often able to provide comic relief to tense moments (2387)

21. they treat women as equal being and fight for their equality in all areas.(1252)

21. ...they make me laugh. (8993)

21. when we’re at a carnival and he wins me something like a plush animals (5702) 21) Actually takes the time to understand how we feel. 9295

20) it hurts when guys judge me based on how I look instead of my personality. (2321)

20. lies to me, just to "protect my feelings." (0613)

20. …doesn’t understand where I am coming from. I don’t tell boys to do their homework or pay their parking fine, but I am simply looking out for them. (9164)

20. …treats me like I am an object and not a human being. (8417)

20. makes me feel stupid for having emotions. (7663)

20. make me feel like I am inferior to them and in some circumstances powerless compared to them. (9994)

20. … doesn’t treat a women with respect. Men shouldn’t cat call or push a woman farther than they would like to sexually. (5659)

  1. 1. Doesn’t see that he doesn’t have to put me down because I am a woman, to make himself seem like more of a man.

21. ...make me laugh. As long as he can still make me laugh, anything else can be resolved. (6503)

21. they make me laugh. (5680)

21. They are respectful (0572)

21. They are respectful to me and shows me that they enjoy spending time with me (2501).

21. we are lying in bed talking. (9232)

21. They prove they are different than the rest. (3651)

21. when we can forget about our gender and have a good time together as humans.(2662)

21. they are polite and charming gentlemen.

they don’t try too hard to be nice. (9031)

21. … they make an effort to include me in their life and how that the relationship is balanced in terms of feelings (6991)

21. I know i am in control (1109)

21. they let their guard down every once in a while and show that they do have feelings and can be sensitive

I am emotionally connecting with them. (1160)

… I can sense that they are passionate about something and let that be their primary motivator. (8077)

...we have those weird, yet deeply significant talks late at night. (0946)

21.They are genuine and have deep and serious conversations with you. (7437)

We are able to uplift one another and be in a positive and conducive relationship with one another. (0423) 21) … they treat me with kindness and make me laugh. (3886)

21. Makes me feel good and confident about myself. (4610)

21. Goes out of their way to do something that will make me genuinely happy.

21. they make me feel loved (8531)

21. They make me feel comfortable (2431)

21. … they treat me like a princess. (4669)

21. ...they feel comfortable enough to open up to me and talk about their feelings. (8359)

21. we are able to communicate well and laugh together (8436)

21. I feel best about the opposite sex when they act like gentlemen. (6536)

21. my boyfriend does something to make me realize they’re not all dicks. (7663)

21. …we can appreciate one another’s differences. (9166)

21. … They show they genuinely care. (2307)

21) I love it when guys have the ability to make me smile and feel good about myself. When they compliment me and I believe what they say. (2321)

  1. 21 they ask me for advice. To ask for someone’s advice shows the utmost respect. Respect is so unbelievably important to me particularly from men because women, in general, aren’t as respected in today’s society. (0497)

21. they make me feel comfortable and loved. If they can keep a smile on my face, it goes a long way for me. (0613)

21. …when we can just goof around and not worry so much about external pressure that comes with a boy and a girl being in the same vicinity. (9164)

21. I feel best about the opposite sex when I see them going out of their way to make the women in their lives feel comfortable and safe, whether it's walking them home or making sure other guys don’t demean them. (0632)

21. they treat me fairly, kindly, and honestly. (8237)

21. …someone is helpful or friendly, just because they are a good person. 3066

21. …they prove all the stereotypes wrong. (8417) 21. I see generosity, understanding and open mindedness. Which I often do at LMU! (5369)

21. … they are more open and vulnerable to talking about their feelings. (5659) 21. when they have my back or support me(6858)

21. they genuinely want to spend time with me, and go out of their way to do so. (0735)

21. Treats me with the utmost respect, but then still finds a good time to make me laugh. (6617)

21. I don’t feel like doing a task around my house or need help. I know I can always call my males friends to help me, of course I’ll have to feed them but that’s fine by me if it get’s my dresser moved. (7302)

They treat me as a person rather than an object. 4531

#21 I feel best about the opposite sex when they go out of their to defend women’s rights without worrying about what their friends might think. As well as this, when boys act the way they act around their girlfriends in front of their friends; they do not act completely different with the presence of others. (2259)

21. they show sensitivity to others, not just women, and when they are just as invested in the relationship as the woman is. (7413) 21. they are honest, respectful, and straightforward. 21. I hangout with my guy friends and boyfriends and realize that there are so many great guys out there. (3816)

21. they treat me the way I was taught by my father and my uncles, and not the way that the media wants men to treat women with disrespect. (2418)

21) they treat me with respect and make me laugh (9634)

21. … they appreciate you. (0018)

I feel bad when a guy gets turned down because it lowers his self esteem. It is tougher to be guy in this sense because it is more common for a guy to approach the girl so the girl hold more power because she is the one who can decide if she wants it or not. (4605)